Love Is Overdue (32 page)

Ivan met his gaze but stayed
silent.

“
So where the wedding at?”
Ben wanted to know.

Ivan hesitated briefly. “Half
Moon.”

Ben’s eyes went wide. He looked to be
debating something in his head. “So Mom plannin’ it or
what?”

Ivan nodded slowly. “It just goin’ be
real small but she wanted to, so…”

I glanced back over at Ben and noticed
something in his expression change. It almost seemed like the idea
of his mother helping Ivan plan his wedding didn’t sit right with
him. He looked like he wanted to say something but instead just
sucked his teeth and stayed silent.

Ivan was just staring him down.
“What?” he demanded suddenly. “Just say what you haffe say,
awright? We all adults here…” His eyes fell on me for a moment.
“And it not like your girlfriend here don’t already have the
back-story, so may as well just keep shit real.”

Ben stared back at Ivan for another
moment but kept his mouth shut. And something told me he was
holding back because of me. I could sense it.

“
I don’t have anything to
say, Ivan. Congratulations.” Ben’s words sounded definite. Case
closed.

Sally let out a deep sigh. “Well,
there we go. That’s a start.” Her voice sliced the tension in the
air. Somewhat.

But the look on Ivan’s face was
growing more and more irritated. “What the fuck is your problem,
Benjamin?”

I flinched slightly and caught my
breath.

“
Ivan.” Sally was in
mediator mode.

“
Nah, y’know what?” Ivan
wasn’t finished though. “This is bullshit, you know, Pops is right,
and I know he tell you himself – this gone on long enough and it
affectin’ more than just you and I, awright? Time for you to just
let this shit go already.”

Ben just sucked his teeth again. “I
have nothin’ to let go, Ivan.” He kept his tone calm. “I told you
before – we cool.”

Ivan’s eyes went wide. “Awright, Ben –
we cool. Right. So then if we cool I can assume you gonna come to
my wedding, right?”

Ben sucked his teeth at that. A little
bitter laugh. “You can assume whatever you like.”

“
Ben.” Sally’s voice again.
Laced with disappointment. “Really?”

Ben leaned forward, his elbows on his
knees. “I’m sorry, I really don’t know what y’all want me to say.”
His defense-mode was picking up. “Ivan – I respect your decision,
awright? Your relationship, your wedding – whatever the fuck else
concerning you and Angela – it’s all good, awright? You want my
blessing? Fine. You got it. But that’s not what alla you really
want…” He addressed Sally then as well. “What alla you really want
is for me and Ivan to be what we once was and that the one thing
that can’t happen. You can’t take back what you did.” His eyes
rested finally back on his brother.

Ivan sighed. “Yeah, you right. But
that’s where you missin’ the point. Am marrying her, Benjamin – so
why the fuck would I want to take back any of it?” He kept his eyes
steady. Focused.

Sally glanced over at Ben. “They love
each other very much.”

Ben’s gaze
shifted back and forth between the two of them again. Now he just
looked pissed. “I’m happy for you, Ivan. And I’m happy that your
mother finally came around and saw shit your way. It’s a beautiful
thing…” Ben’s eyes focused over on me then…finally. “You ready to
go?”

I took a breath. “I…guess
so.”

Ω

Ben took me
upstairs to check on Sophie, leaving Sally and Ivan out on the
porch behind us. He stopped me at the top of the stairs after
peaking in on Sophie and pulled me close, wrapping his arms around
me, giving me a nice, long warm hug. My fingers grazed his back,
tightening their grip, inhaling his sweet scent. He pulled back,
kissing my forehead tenderly.

“
What was that for?” I
asked softly.

“
For having to witness all
that bullshit downstairs,” he said simply, still sounding somewhat
irritated, but his voice was soft now. “You need another
one?”

I sighed. “I think you do.”

He smiled slightly and wrapped his
arms around me once more. Fuck, he felt good. But something was
nagging me and had been for a while already. I tightened my grip
around him and took a deep breath. “Ben, if you’re really over
Angela then why is it you can’t just make up with your brother? I
mean, it seems like to me that if you really don’t have feelings
for her then…”

Ben pulled away slowly while I spoke
and now was staring back at me. He was mad now. I could tell. Even
though I could also tell he was trying not to show it. “That’s what
you think?”

I opened my
mouth to respond but Ben just cut me off.

“
Let’s go. Am not talkin’
about this here.”

Ω

Ben’s parents were both out on the
porch speaking softly when we came down to say our goodbyes but
Ivan was already gone. Ben kept the farewell short and
sweet.

When we got
back in the car, silence took over again for a good few minutes. I
hated it. Why would what I said have affected him so much if it
wasn’t true? My heart started sinking.

We were stopped at a red light and I
saw Ben glance over at me. He hesitated slightly and then spoke.
“Your place or mine?”

I shrugged. “Doesn’t
matter.”

Ben sucked his teeth softly, my change
of mood obviously not lost on him either. “I hate drama, Gabriela.
I’m a pretty simple guy.”

That made me glance over. “You
accusing me of something?”

Ben sighed. “No. Look…this isn’t about
Angela…I mean, it is and it isn’t…it’s complicated. And I don’t see
what this has to do with me and you. The past is the
past.”

I gave him a shocked stare. “Well, I
think if you still have feelings for another woman then it has a
lot to do with me and you.”

We were stopped at a light and Ben
turned and met my eyes. He didn’t look impressed. “I don’t have
feelings for Angela. We been through all this before
too.”

I bit my lip. I didn’t want to make
him mad. But I was hurt and I hated how dismissive he was being. So
I stayed silent.

Ben flipped on the stereo system and
some Mavado started blasting from the speakers. Then as we headed
up Broadway, Ben made a left turn onto Fraser.

“
My place?” I was
surprised.

“
Yeah. Your place,” Ben
said simply. “Unless you don’t want me to stay.”

I just shrugged again. “Your
choice.”

Ben pulled up in front of my house and
shifted into park. He glanced over at me. “So my
choice?”

I nodded, staring out through the
front windshield. “Yup.”

He let his breath out slowly and then
I felt his hand running gently down my thigh and squeezing, ever so
lightly. “Well, then I wanna stay…”

Chapter
Fifteen

Once inside neither of us really said
much. I headed straight for the kitchen, clearing up a few dirty
dishes from the table and straightening up. I poured myself a glass
of water and wandered down the hall. Ben was in the bathroom – door
open, tap running – brushing his teeth.

I lingered in the doorway. “What are
you doing?” I asked the obvious, absentmindedly.

He eyed me briefly. “Using your
toothbrush,” he mumbled, his mouth full.

My mouth dropped open. “Seriously?”
But of course it didn’t really bother me at all. I did it secretly
all the time at his place.

Ben rinsed and spit. Everything he did
seemed to turn me on…

“
Why you look so
surprised?” he wanted to know. “I catch you all the time, you know
– I just never say anything.”

I knew the guilt was plastered all
over my face. “I like a clean mouth,” I said innocently.

He gave me a little smile. “That’s
good. Here you go.” He handed me back my toothbrush. “All clean for
you.”

“
Hmm. Thank you.” I took
the brush from him and moved over to the sink, grabbing the
toothpaste.

Ben disappeared again so I brushed my
teeth quickly, wondering what the fuck was up with him. I was
rinsing my mouth when he reappeared behind me in the mirror. He had
one of my thick cream-coloured bath towels draped over his
shoulder, obviously having just raided the linen closet.

He pulled the shower curtain back and
turned on the faucet in the tiny tub/shower and began adjusting the
water.

“
You’re taking a shower?” I
asked the obvious yet again.

Ben stood up and came up behind me
then. I stared back at him through the cracked vanity mirror. It
embarrassed me all the time although I tried not to let it…the
stark comparison between my home and his.

He ran his hand up my back, sending a shiver down my spine.
“No.
We’re
taking a shower.”

I stared back at him then, my body
seizing up in anxious protest. “I can’t.”

Ben raised his eyebrows at me in the
mirror, his hands running slowly down my shoulders. “Yes, you
can.”

I let my breath out slowly. “No, I
mean…” My voice trailed off as I imagined my mother running a bath
and downing a handful of pills. “I just hate this
bathroom.”

Ben kept rubbing my shoulders, his
eyes running all over my reflection in the mirror. “Well, we gotta
fix that then…”

“
Ben…” I started to protest
again but my voice trailed off as I watched his hand move up higher
and pull at the band holding up my hair…and I watched with him as
my messy mop of dark curls fell down over my shoulders.

A small smile spread across his lips.
“I like your hair,” he said softly, pulling it over across one of
my shoulders and then leaning over to kiss my neck. “You still mad
at me?”

I let my breath out, my heart rate
quickening under his touch. “A little,” I admitted. Then I nodded
my chin at the running faucet. “I’ve never done that before.” I
normally tried to hide my inexperiences with him but sometimes they
just came pouring out of me.

Ben’s eyes fixed on mine again. “Done
what?” He gave me a strange look. “Take a shower?”

I rolled my eyes at him. “Take a
shower with someone…with a guy…with anyone…I’ve never done that.”
My nerves were definitely showing now.

But Ben just let his breath out and
stared back at me, his hands running around my waist and pulling me
close to him. “Then you’re in luck…”

I let my breath out slowly. “I
am?”

He nodded slowly, staring back at me
again as his hands moved around my waist, undoing the belt that was
synching my sarong. His eyes fell from my face in the mirror and
moved down my body like liquid. He unknotted and unwrapped the
fabric slowly until he slid it off me completely.

I winced at myself in the mirror,
under the horror of the fluorescent lights. I really hadn’t thought
this one through. Now I was just standing there in my strapless bra
and panties. I was thankful the mirror came down only waist
high.

“
This is nice…” Ben’s voice
pulled me from my thoughts. He was cupping my breasts and pushing
up gently, extending my cleavage by a mile. He smiled as he
continued squeezing softly. “Musta been expensive…”

I was confused. “What?” I asked
nervously.

He laughed at my expression in the
mirror. “This bra,” he said, still fondling and caressing me
through the padded fabric. “To hold these up…must be made of steel
or somethin’…”

“
Hmmm…you’re so funny,
Ben.” I tried to dismiss it, still wondering how I was going to get
out of this whole showering together dilemma he was putting me in,
but my body was already responding to his every touch. I wanted him
so badly.

His hands moved around me again and I
felt the tug of his fingers as he released the clasp of my bra and
pulled it off me so smoothly. My nipples were so hard and I saw Ben
suck his breath in approvingly. “You ready?” He nodded toward the
bath. “You want your hair back up?”

I nodded silently and then watched as
Ben reached up and pulled my hair back up in a bun, securing it
with the band. He was so tender, so gentle. Then he reached down
and pulled his t-shirt up over his head, exposing his gorgeous lean
torso, those broad shoulders and flat belly. His shorts hung low on
his hips, even with the belt.

I felt frozen as I just kept watching
him in the mirror as he unclasped his belt and pulled his shorts
and boxers off so smoothly. He pushed up behind me again then, this
time his hands running over my hips, hooking the waist of my
panties with his thumbs and pulling down slowly. “You coming?” he
coaxed me gently.

I let my breath out again, glancing
back over at the tub. “It’s so small…”

He pulled my panties down further and
I stepped out of them completely. “That’s okay, you’re allowed to
touch me,” he assured me softly. “That’s kinda the
point.”

I smiled at that and let him pull me
into the shower. He had adjusted the temperature perfectly, I
noted, as my body became drenched under the warm spray of the
water. I tipped my head back, facing the spray, so as not to wet my
hair and I felt Ben’s arms circle around me from behind. I felt him
press up against me. He was already hard and I felt a surge of
excitement rush through me. I wondered then if he was really just
planning on showering with me…