Masquerade (30 page)

“
Just during the day?” she
asked.

I felt a fine blush spread
over my cheeks as I nodded. “I watch your house at night. To keep
you safe.”

“
All this time I thought I
was crazy,” she murmured to herself.

“
Why?”

“
Because I always felt like
I was being watched. I always sensed that something was there, in
the shadows watching me.”

“
I didn’t know you felt
that way. I never meant to scare you.” I said.

“
Just like you never meant
to lie?”

“
I lied to protect you. I
thought I would be able to kill China before now.”

“
Why haven’t
you?”

“
She’s strong and whenever
I manage to get the upper hand, something always manages to get in
the way.”

“
So that’s it then? She’s
going to keep coming at me until I’m dead?”

“
No! I won’t let that
happen.” I rushed to her side and sank down on the bed next to her.
“That’s the reason I can’t let you leave, and why I can’t stay
away.”

“
Please,” I whispered. “I
want to go home.”

“
Okay. I’ll take you.” The
truth was out now, and I couldn’t keep her here. She wouldn’t want
me around but that was okay; I could protect her from afar, and I
would.

She didn’t refuse the ride,
and I took that as a good sign
.
With a ballroom full of people downstairs she
could have asked anyone for a ride
.
But she didn’t. Maybe there was a chance for us
after all.

The drive to her house was
quiet and sad. I had hoped this night would be so different. I
thought it would be the beginning for me and Heven
–
not the end. I thought
that finally, tonight, she would confess her love. I was naive to
think that she would love me at all.

When I pulled into the
driveway, I shut off the engine and turned to face her. “Want me to
explain to your mother why you’re late? I can make something
up.”

“
No. I’ll do it,” she
said, reaching for the handle.

“
If you want to talk you
can call me anytime.”

She wasn’t going to
call
.
I knew
that
.
She got out
of the truck and I scrambled out after her, not needing to walk her
the short distance to the door but wanting to prolong my time with
her
.
At the door
she refused to face me.

“
I love you, Heven.” I told
her, needing to say the words.

She put a hand up to her
scars, whispering, “Your love comes with a heavy price
tag.”

She walked into the house and shut the
door in my face. I didn’t know if she would ever talk to me again.
I didn’t know how to make things right. The only thing I had left
to offer her was my absence. And her life. Standing there in the
dark, my heart in a million pieces, I made a vow. I would give
Heven back the life she lost. I would kill China. And then, if she
wanted me too I would walk away and never look back.

Chapter
Fifteen

Heven

I spent the weekend
avoiding Kimber’s phone calls, claiming I had a stomach bug. I used
the same excuse to stay in my room all weekend, away from my
mother. When Monday morning came, I pleaded I was still sick, even
going as far as running into the bathroom to make retching sounds
while I poured water in the toilet. Mom was convinced and let me
stay home from school. At eight-thirty I felt my first breath of
relief when she left for work. Finally, I was blissfully
alone. I lay in bed a while longer wallowing in
misery. The guy I loved wasn’t even human, and it felt like my
heart would never mend.

I padded down to the
kitchen and made some hot tea and brought it up to my room,
crawling back under the
covers. I thought
about everything he told me, about the danger I was in and how a
crazy hellhound wanted me dead. I knew I should be terrified, but
my emptiness at the loss of Sam muted those feelings. And to make
it worse the nightmares kept coming, but instead of the animal-like
claws attacking me, there were long, red fingernails biting into my
skin, drawing blood while Sam stood watching in the
background
.
When
I would wake up, I would lay there and cry wondering how my life
got so messed up. I was so incredibly miserable. What made
everything that much worse was the one person who could make it all
go away was the reason for the pain. How could I miss Sam after all
he’d done? I burrowed further under the covers, trying to go back
to sleep, except I wasn’t tired. I’d slept too much this weekend. I
was wide-awake with my misery.

I threw the covers back and sat up,
reaching for my tea. I jumped and screamed, tea spilling
everywhere, when I saw Sam sitting on the floor by my dresser.
“Owww!” I wailed, scrubbing at the hot liquid.

Sam jumped up. “I’m sorry.” He rushed
to the side of the bed.

“
I’ve
got it,” I told him, pulling the shirt out away from my skin.
It burned and stung. Tea dripped down my arms and legs making me
feel sticky and wet. Like I wasn’t already miserable enough, now I
had to have burns?

I gathered up the soaked bedding and
tossed it on the floor. Then I grabbed a clean shirt and went into
the bathroom to change. When I came out Sam was stuffing the
bedding into the washing machine. He looked up apologetically, “I
don’t know how to use this.”

I sighed and gave him a quick lesson,
putting in the detergent and showing him how to use the settings.
When the task was complete I went back to my room. Sam
followed.

“
What are you doing
here?”

“
You didn’t go to school.
Your mom finally left and I wanted to make sure that you’re okay
and see if you needed anything.”

“
I’m fine. You can
go.”

“
You can’t be here all day
alone, Heven.”

“
This is about China.” I
was sorely disappointed. Was I hoping he would say he missed me,
that he wanted to see me?

“
It’s about your
safety.”

That didn’t make me feel any better.
“I’m fine.”

“
I’ll just stay and make
sure.”

“
You can’t
stay.”

“
Why?”

Because it hurts too much.
Because I want to throw myself into your arms and never let go.
Because I want to forgive you, but I can’t.
“Just go.”

“
I’ll be outside if you
need me.” He walked to the door.

“
Outside?” I couldn’t stop
myself from asking.

“
I’ve been here all
weekend.”

“
What?”

“
I told you I would protect
you.”

He stayed outside all weekend to
protect me? To watch over me?

He nodded, looking
exhausted. When he was halfway down the stairs I went after him. I
couldn’t let him go again; he made me feel better even though I
didn’t want him to.

“
Have you
eaten?”

“
I’ll get something
later.”

“
I’ll fix you a
sandwich.”

He looked up, his eyes flashing
gold.

My heart leapt.

He followed me into
the
kitchen, seeming tired and worried,
which
for the life of me I could not
understand. After admitting to sitting outside the entire weekend
to keep watch over me like a stalker, coming into my house without
being invited, and scaring me almost to death…and only now that I
was to make him a sandwich he was worried?

“
Like any sandwich I made
could be that bad…” I muttered, grabbing the bread.

“
What?”

I jumped a mile high because I had no
clue that he was inches behind me. “Geez, stop sneaking up on
me!”

“
Sorry.” He moved to the
other side of the kitchen, giving me some space. This was a good
thing, right?

I sighed and focused on the turkey
sandwich I was slapping together. Extra mayo, extra turkey,
cheese…I held up a tomato and he shook his head, making a face. I
put the tomato down and topped the sandwich with another slice of
white and carried it over to him. He reached for the sandwich, and
his fingers brushed mine. I felt the jolt as if I were
electrocuted. He froze and looked up at me. I ignored him and went
back across the kitchen to grab a soda. When I turned back, half
the sandwich was gone. I began making another; clearly, he was
starved.

“
When’s the last time you
ate?”

He shrugged and shoved the rest into
his mouth. Geez, did he even chew? After I handed him the second
sandwich I turned to walk away, but he grabbed the hem of my
T-shirt and pulled me back. “Hey.”

My stomach did that flippy thing, and
I prayed that he couldn’t hear my heart accelerate. Who knew what a
hellhound was capable of? “What are you?” I whispered.

His hand slid away from me. “I’m the
same guy I’ve always been.”

“
I never really knew you
at
all.” I had no idea that he was a
hellhound and lived on his own with a bunch of other hellhounds who
liked to kill.

“
I only hid
what
I am, not
who
I am.” He sat the
sandwich on the table like he’d lost his appetite.

“
Isn’t that the same
thing?”

Slowly he shook his head.

I wasn’t sure how to respond, so I
busied myself by cleaning up. “You don’t need to stay.”

“
I’ll go outside, but I am
not leaving.” he said being stubborn.

“
Fine! Do what you want
anyway!” I said, exasperated. I wanted to run from the room, but he
was near the door, so I settled for turning my back on
him.

I shouldn’t have been
surprised that he appeared behind me
instantly, soundlessly, but I was. I felt his hands hover
above my shoulders before they settled, warm and heavy. With gentle
hands and strong arms he turned me around and cupped my face,
forcing me to look into his hypnotic eyes. “I don’t want to hurt
you. I would die to protect you from pain.”

My skin tingled under his touch, and
it was his words, not his eyes, that hypnotized me.
“Sam…”

His lips brushed over mine,
and while I willed myself to push him away, I pulled him closer. I
opened my mouth wider and his tongue slipped in, making me groan.
There was a sharp thump and a gasp from the door of the kitchen.
Before I could register anything, Sam flipped around, tucking me
behind him. I stared at the tense, rippling muscles of his
back
.

“
What is going on
here?”

Oh, crap.
It was my mother.

I tapped Sam on the
shoulder and he turned, his eyes full of regret. “I wasn’t paying
attention,” he whispered. “I didn’t hear drive up, I was so focused
on you…” his eyes dropped back to my lips. I understood because
everything else fell away when I was with him
too
.

I stepped around him to look at my
mother. “Mom, this isn’t what it looks like.”

“
You mean you didn’t
pretend to be sick so you could skip school and…and…act like a
harlot?”

A harlot? What the heck was that? Sam
must have heard it before because he actually growled. Like that
helped anything.

“
Mom…”

“
I do not want to hear it,
young lady,” she said, bending to pick up her dropped keys and
purse. “You and I are going to have a talk. And you,” she said
pointing at Sam, her face flushing, “you are going to leave. You
are not welcome here.”

“
Mom!”

Sam turned to face me, his hazel eyes
darkening. “I’ll see you later,” he whispered.

“
Go!” Mom told
him.

When he was gone, Mom stared at me,
hard. “Are you proud of yourself?”

“
He came by to see if I was
okay, that’s all.”

“
Are you even
sick?”

“
Yes.” At the moment I felt
like hurling.

“
I didn’t want to believe…”
she murmured, sitting down at the kitchen table. I don’t even think
she heard me.

“
Believe what?”

“
I thought you understood;
I raised you with the Lord.”

“
Mom, it was one kiss.” It
wasn’t as if we were naked on the floor.

“
You did so well after the
accident. I understood that you were sullen and self-conscious
about your scar.”

She wasn’t making any
sense.

“
But these past few weeks,
I began to see the change in you: the cheering, the parties, the
boys.”

I felt like she’d slapped me. “I was
helping the cheer team out at a competition so they wouldn’t get
disqualified. It was two parties, this whole year, and the only boy
is Sam.”