She won’t see the person you want her to see; she’ll see who you really are.
Ouch. Even his subconscious was against him.
Lisette exited the bathroom after having dumped her toiletries off. “Will you be okay here while I go harass Marty?”
“Oh yeah, sure.”
She raised one eyebrow. “Don’t feel the need to come with me?”
He sighed. Yeah, he deserved that. “I’m sure. I do trust you; it’s just hard for me sometimes.”
“I know it is.” She grabbed his shoulders and looked into his eyes. “You need to remember. I am not your ex-wife. If I met her, I’d probably punch her for what she did to you.”
“Strangely, that’s one of the nicest things anyone’s ever said to me.”
“Nobody messes with my man.” Lisette stepped back and stared at a spot on the carpet before taking a deep breath.
What was that about?
“I’ll be back in a few hours, and we can find someplace for dinner.”
He used the time Lisette was away to give himself a stern talking-to, and by the time she walked into the room a few hours later, he had convinced himself he wasn’t going to have a heart attack, either from worrying about what she was doing or from the fact that they were going to be sleeping in the same bed. Ryan had even been able to successfully find and watch a lame TV movie. Lisette plopped down beside him on the sofa as if it was nothing new.
“How was Marty?”
“Exasperated but understanding. Oh, and by the way, he’s married with four children. If he was any happier, I think he’d burst.” She nudged him. “Marty told me about a good steakhouse not too far from here. He also said he’d keep you as my dirty little secret, for a price.”
“Great…”
Scooting over, she turned her face up, and he obliged her with a quick kiss. “I just wanted to see your face when I said that.”
“Need I remind you what happens to cheeky girls?”
“Ow. No. My ass is just getting back to normal from Saturday.”
“Then be good. You can be a good girl, can’t you?”
“Why does your saying ‘good girl’ make me purr?”
He laughed. “I have no idea. It’s good I have that kind of power, though. I will make every attempt to be a benevolent dictator. Okay, let’s go to dinner so we can get back here. I want to do unimaginable things to you.”
“Oh, you do talk pretty.”
They had a nice dinner, but when Lisette sidled through the door of their room afterward, Ryan was on her in a heartbeat. Pushing her against the wall in the foyer, he leaned his weight into her.
“I want to fuck you.” Ryan did a slow roll of his hips, and she groaned. “Stay right there.” He grabbed a condom and was quickly back. “Hike up your skirt, and then put your palms flat on the wall.”
She was already breathing hard, and her breath hitched at his order. Taking a moment to enjoy the sight of her panty-clad ass and incredible legs, he pulled her panties down to midthigh and unzipped enough to put on the condom. Feeling for her wetness, he groaned as his fingertips easily slid through her pussy lips. “Is my little slut ready for cock?”
“Always, sir.”
“That’s what I like to hear.” He bent his legs and, with one swift stroke, entered her to the hilt. Both of them moaned, and he immediately began to move, his hips snapping again and again as he kept up a litany of dirty talk. In front of him, Lisette was going crazy, moaning and shifting as she slammed back into him. Ryan sped up even more, grabbing one of her hips in a punishing grip while he found her distended clit with the fingers of his other hand and stroked in time with his thrusts. “Come for me, sub.”
Lisette screamed out her release, and Ryan followed her shortly thereafter. They slumped against the wall, breathing like they’d run a marathon, but Ryan soon forced himself to pull away, both to take care of the condom and because he didn’t want to crush her. After quickly cleaning himself up, he came back with a warm washcloth. Lisette was still leaning heavily on the wall, and he helped her over to the bed, where she fell on her belly. Ryan cleaned her and threw the washcloth into the bathroom.
“You okay?”
“Someday you’re going to kill me.”
Ryan grinned and sat down beside her. “But what a way to go.”
She rolled to face him, hiking her panties back up and pushing down her skirt as she settled. “I wasn’t complaining. I was stating a fact.”
“Good, because you’re not getting rid of me. I’m your Dominant.”
Lisette smoothed a hand down Ryan’s cheek and neck to his chest, where she stopped over his heart.
“I don’t want to get rid of you.”
He held her hand to his heart between them and kissed her, their tongues dueling for a time before the kiss gentled into a lazy exploration of mouths. When they broke apart, he touched his forehead to hers and looked deep into her eyes. “I don’t want to get rid of you either.”
Ryan could swear he saw some deep emotions lurking in her gaze, but he wasn’t sure he was ready to acknowledge them, so he kept silent, instead choosing to kiss her again. They made out like teenagers for a while, rolling around on the bed, but Ryan wanted Lisette to get some good sleep while she was here, so he insisted they go to bed around eleven. Her breathing leveled out after only a few minutes, and Ryan was glad she was getting some much-needed rest. He wasn’t so lucky, lying awake for hours and staring at the popcorn ceiling as he tried to figure out what he felt for Lisette. At this point, would he even recognize love?
The thought of her being with anyone else made him see red, and that had to mean something. She’d made him admit he considered himself her Dominant, which by itself was huge. He wanted to take care of her, to give her everything she needed. She was a perfect match for him in so many ways, both in and out of the bedroom. But did he want to get serious so soon? Did she? The thoughts churned around his brain like a demented Tilt-a-Whirl until finally Ryan fell into a fitful sleep.
* * * *
Lisette pulled herself out of sleep when her cell phone alarm rang. After groaning and turning it off, she bumped into something warm next to her when she stretched, and a smile bloomed on her face. Ryan, her Dominant. Ryan was here with her. Rolling over slowly so as not to disturb him, she watched him sleep for a few minutes until she started to feel like a creeper. He turned onto his back, one forearm slung over his eyes, and an obvious erection tented the sheet.
She was well aware of the concept of morning wood but hadn’t spent the night with a lot of men in her lifetime. Master Taz was her first serious relationship, and she never spent the night with him. He didn’t feel it was proper for a Dominant to sleep with his submissive. Peeking under the cover, she saw it looked exactly like an erection Ryan would get at any other time.
What a pain, to wake up to that every morning, especially since most men can’t do anything about it.
He was naked, and his copper-colored nipples were calling to her. Lisette tried to recall if he’d ever let her play with his nipples and whether or not he’d liked it, but her sluggish precoffee brain wasn’t much help with recollection. Stealing closer, she reached a hand over his body to steady herself and licked one of his nipples with quick, firm strokes before sucking it into her mouth. It was obvious the moment he came to consciousness, because he stiffened, and she was about to pull back when his heavy hand landed on the back of her head, holding her to his chest.
“You weren’t thinking of leaving, were you? Tease. Oh, and good morning.”
She pulled off long enough to quickly confirm that yes, it was morning, before bending to her task once more. Lisette left off the “good” part. Morning was never good before the caffeine spread through her system.
“What a way to wake up,” Ryan mused.
“I wanted to play a little.”
He looked down at her and smirked. “Far be it for me to refuse you, but I think you should straddle me upside down so I can have my way with you while you suck my cock.”
“Sixty-nine? What a great idea.”
“I’m full of them.”
“Full of something. Ow!”
“That was for being cheeky. Don’t make me redden your ass before you go see Marty. He might wonder what’s got you so squirmy.”
With a soft
tsk
she rearranged herself.
“Much better.”
Lisette concentrated on driving Ryan crazy while he no doubt was attempting the same to her. Much as she loved BDSM and doing scenes, there was something to be said for vanilla sex. When Ryan gave her a sharp nip, she glared at him. “Ow.”
“Sorry.”
He didn’t look sorry. Of course it hadn’t been enough to bruise or break the skin, but still. This early in the morning, she wasn’t ready for erotic pain. Ryan didn’t know that, though, since they’d never spent the night together.
“Grab a condom.”
“I need to get going.”
“And you will. But you’ll come before you go.”
Knowing she wasn’t going to talk him out of this, she glanced at the clock. She had about fifteen minutes before she needed to get a move on. That was enough time to play a bit and still grab a quick shower before she left to be a pain in the ass to Marty. Reaching over to the nightstand, she grabbed a condom and was about to hand it to him when he said, “Put it on me.” She had to lean way over to do so, and he licked, kissed, and sucked any patch of skin he could get his mouth on.
“Now ride me in reverse, cowgirl. I want to watch my cock slide in and out of your pussy.”
She finally wrestled on the condom—she’d never been good at that and certainly wasn’t smooth—and then scooted down his body. Ryan held her hips as she guided his thick erection inside. With a moan Lisette sank all the way down. “You always feel so good.”
“Fuck me. Ride my dick.”
“Yes, sir.” With his help she impaled herself on him over and over, feeling the first sweet twinges of her orgasm beginning to build. His breathing was becoming erratic while he spouted a litany of filth as he watched them move together.
Ryan growled, and Lisette threw her head back. She loved how Ryan didn’t treat her like a glass doll. He fucked her hard and didn’t apologize for it. God, they were so compatible in so many ways.
Her head snapped up, and her mouth went dry. All of this seemed so natural; him being at work with her every night, them playing at the club on the weekend, and even sharing a hotel room here.
Oh, shit. I did it. I fell in love with him.
“Why did you stop moving, baby? You okay?”
“What? Yeah, sorry. I’m fine.”
“I’m sure Marty won’t care when you get in.”
“No, you’re right, he won’t.”
“Then finish me. I want to see you fly apart on my dick.”
“When you put it like that…”
Soon both of them were clutching the sheets and grinding out their releases, and though at the moment Lisette would’ve liked nothing better than to collapse in a heap, she had to get up. With her thoughts all jumbled up at the moment, she needed some distance from Ryan anyway. “Gonna take a shower and run outta here.”
“See you later.”
She hauled ass toward the shower like she was being chased by a hungry alligator. Once in the cab on the way to see Marty, she leaned back against the seat. Her thoughts were darting back and forth, scrambling in every direction, and it was impossible to get a handle on what was going on inside her. But the one thing she kept coming back to was,
What am I gonna do?
* * * *
It was no better that evening at dinner, as Ryan talked about inconsequential things while her brain screamed at her to tell him she loved him. No, impossible. He’d tell her he wasn’t ready, and then she’d feel like a fool. Better to wait.
For how long?
When dinner was over, Ryan took her hand. “Look at me.”
Her gaze flew to his, and she frowned at the intensity in his eyes.
“I did a lot of thinking today, a lot of soul-searching.”
“Uh-huh…”
“I think I’ve figured out why I went on that loony cleaning-out spree.”
“Oh?” Monosyllabic answers no doubt made her sound like a moron, but right then, there was no way she could have put together something more complicated. She held her breath and waited for him to continue.
“Yes. I want you to move in with me.”
“You what?”
He smiled. “Move in with me.”
“But—”
“I know, I know, there are a million reasons why we shouldn’t, and I know a lot of them have to do with my problems, not yours. But give me a chance.”
“Why do you want to do this?”
“Well, I was going to save the second part of my grand plan for once the shock from asking you to move in had worn off, but it might make more sense to lay all my cards down.”
“Okay. Um, go ahead.”
Is he proposing? Oh my God, I hope he’s not proposing, because I’ll say yes, and I’m not sure that’s the best answer. Is he really ready for that kind of commitment?
Her question was answered immediately.
“I want to do a collaring ceremony. I spoke with Jack on the phone for a long time today about how I felt and what I wanted. I’m not ready to get married quite yet, but I want you in my life and by my side. He mentioned the formal collaring ceremony, and it was like birds started singing.” He looked down at the tablecloth with a sheepish grin. “I want you. I love you, and I want you.”
“Back up the truck.”
“To which part?”
Ryan’s thumb moved in slow circles over the back of her hand as she tried to compartmentalize what he’d said.
Not ready to marry.
Ready to move in.
Ready to collar.
Loves me.
She stared at him. “You love me?”
“I do, and I hope in time you’ll love me back.”
“I do.”
“I don’t want you to say—” She slapped her hand over his mouth, and he pulled it away with a mock glare. “That was rude.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know how to make you stop talking. Yes, I love you too. I only came to the realization recently, but once I did, it felt right, you know?”
“Yes, I do.”
“So let me make sure I understand. You want me to move in, and you want to collar me?”