Morning Star (14 page)

But she had other thoughts as well, ones she had discovered on her own. “Who
is
this Jesus? Joseph says He's a son of God just like we are; that Lucifer is His brother. The only unique thing about Him is that when He and Lucifer volunteered to go save the world because of original sin, He was chosen instead. Because of that, He had a special body, which God was responsible for when He came down to sleep with Mary.”

Jenny gave a troubled sigh. She poured hot water over the cups and reached for the towel. “The only thing is, when I heard
that
, it didn't give me a turn at all. But now every time I pick up the Bible and read about Jesus living on this earth, healing people and telling them stories, even giving out strict sermons, I just get more curious.”

Jenny held a teacup up to the sunshine and admired the way light rays put rainbows of pastel color through the milky china. “Hold it up to the light, you see more,” she mused, rubbing her thumb across the cup.

She turned away to stack the clean dishes in the cupboard, but her hands were slow. In her reading, the word
believe
was causing the problem.
Seems I keep falling over it
, she thought.

As she picked up the broom and headed for the parlor, she addressed the empty room. “I find myself wishing more for Tom. I have a better time trying out my questions on him 'cause he knows enough about me that I can't get scared out of questioning. It's been a long time since he reminded me it's a sin to ask questions, or to doubt. Could be he's having some questions too.”

By the time Jenny finished sweeping and dusting, she had decided to seek Joseph's advice. The decision left her satisfied, and she carried the Bibles to the kitchen table.

Yesterday she had found the paper marked “mystery of Christ,” but after being caught up with all the
believe
verses in the book of St. John, she had put it back in Mark's Bible, carefully, lest he guess she was looking through his notes.

As Jenny thumbed through her Bible, she mused over her need for secrecy. “Mark shoves so much at me I can't accept. I'd rather find out for myself. I'm fearing he's been led astray. Like atonement.”

Moving carefully through the Book, discovering she could now more easily find the references, Jenny followed Mark's notes leading her to Ephesians. She read, and then leaned back in her chair, slowly putting her thoughts into words. “This Paul is talking about having a knowledge of the mystery of Christ. Seems from his words, the mystery is that the Gentiles can have the same promises the children of Israel have—through Christ.”

Now her eyes caught two things on the page in front of her, the first was a drift of words across the page—the
unsearchable riches of Christ
. The second was a scripture notation—Mark had written in:
Romans 9:30-32; 10:2-4
.

Jenny didn't know about Romans, and it took her a long time to find the passage; when she did, she read and then puzzled over it. The implications filled her with dismay. “It says the Gentiles who aren't even related to the children of Israel found righteousness by faith, but that the children of Israel didn't have righteousness because instead of using faith, they were using works of law,” she murmured.

“Why, Joseph says we're the children of Israel by baptism, whereby the Holy Spirit changes our blood into children of Israel blood, and he teaches we're righteous by keeping the law and by doing the works of the church.”

She was thoughtful for a moment before returning to Romans. Then she read: “‘For Christ
is
the end of the law for righteousness to every one that believeth.'” She closed the Book, saying, “There's that
believe
again. I wonder what it means?” All the other verses stacked up in her mind, like a towering pile of library books.

With a sigh she went back to the final verse Mark had listed, 1 Corinthians 2:7. “More mystery,” she muttered. “Now it's talking about the wisdom of God being a mystery, and that if it weren't, the princes of this world wouldn't have crucified the Lord of glory.” For a long time she struggled with the words
princes of this world
and
the Lord of glory
.

When she finally closed the Bible, it was with an impatient snap and a sigh of frustration. The verses she read told her that God was calling her into fellowship with His Son Jesus Christ. And all those other verses said the same. But they didn't tell her
how
.

Jenny replaced the Bibles, straight, just the way Mark had placed them. She cocked her head, looking at them, then decided. “I'm going to have to visit Joseph, even if I must chase him clear to Carthage.

“I don't understand all those verses, and some of them he's not been reading himself. I wonder if my saying carries enough weight to change the church.
By faith
.”

She grinned at the foolish picture of Joseph leading Jenny to the front and dramatically acknowledging the new revelation.

“Silly. Joseph thinks women are to be seen, not heard; and besides, it isn't a new revelation; it's been there all along.”

****

On Relief Society day, Jenny decided again to approach Joseph with her questions. The meeting itself had spurred on the idea.

Since the day Jenny first urged Sarah Pratt to accompany her, the two had been riding together. Jenny was beginning to enjoy Sarah's company, but since that first time together, Jenny sensed there were many deep and hidden places in the woman's life.

Not daring to probe with questions which might raise the specter of gossip again, Jenny listened and learned. She guessed there were deep hurts, but she also saw Sarah's loyalty.

Sarah's references to her husband were guarded. Jenny knew he had been cut off from his apostleship. Soon she realized that part of the gossip was correct. Orson's quarrel with the Prophet had been responsible, but surely it wasn't because of the rumor of Sarah's adultery.

This fine June day, Sarah loaded Aaron into Jenny's buggy, saying, “I'll not be riding back with you. Orson has a meeting with Joseph this morning and he will take me home from the meeting.”

Her face was radiant with pride and Jenny said, “That's good, isn't it?”

Sarah looked astonished, paused, and then said, “Seems you don't know that we've both been rebaptized. Joseph has accepted us back into full fellowship.”

“I wonder why he had to rebaptize you?” Jenny saw the embarrassment on Sarah's face and hurried on. “I was baptized in the Presbyterian church years ago. At that time I learned that just one baptism was necessary. When I joined this church I went along with the Prophet since he told me my former baptism was to be nullified by being baptized into the Latter-day Saints Church. Apparently the first was not any good to begin with.”

Abruptly the symbols of sacrament and baptism surfaced in Jenny's mind. She was again seeing the sun-shot window with its glorious brilliance, and a finger of purple light beamed at the chalice of wine. Just as abruptly, overlapping the picture, came the same chalice—now dark and shadowed, bearing the horror of blood.

Jenny shivered and Sarah looked at her in concern. “Are you coming down with the ague? I'd thought we'd put that behind us.”

“No,” Jenny shook her head, “I was just thinking about baptisms and such. It's scary—this not being sure of things, only doing the best you can, and then wondering.”

“You're talking about the church?” Sarah frowned and slowly said, “I know what you mean. The troubles of the past year have left me wondering. Might of been, if Orson hadn't needed so badly to be restored to fellowship, I'd have been gone forever.”

Jenny studied her, remembering the talk she'd heard in Kirtland. “Then you don't really think Joseph is the Christ of this dispensation?”

Sarah thought and then sighed. “I've got to—there's nothing else to lean on, seeing the Bible's polluted and the true Christian church has been gone for fourteen hundred years. I felt the witness confirming it all, or I'd never have joined in the first place.”

She looked curiously at Jenny and then asked. “Looking at your face, I'm thinking you need to be asking, too. Mostly you look like you've more questions than a person should be asked to handle.”

“Are you talking about the burning in the bosom like Tom talks about?”

She nodded. “Have you been into the museum since it was finished? The mummies are on display.” She paused and added, “You know, if you aren't interested in the burning of the bosom, there's the writings.

“You know the translation of the text they found with the mummies turned out to be the writings of Abraham. Did you know Joseph has finished the book and it's being printed now?”

They had reached Nauvoo; the horses slowed in the press of traffic. Sarah said, “There's Joseph's Nauvoo Mansion. Just looks like a nice home to me. Wish he could be satisfied for a time. This building a hotel seems a little too grand right now when we're still so poor.”

“Mark says there's many visitors coming to the city.” Jenny turned to look at the neat home, adding, “Sure, it's bigger than most of us will ever have. I suppose his needs are greater.”

“I hear Emma's expecting again.” Sarah sighed. “Poor woman, I'm really sorry for her with feeling so badly and then having to contend—” She glanced sharply at Jenny, looking embarrassed. “I—where are we going for meeting today?”

“Rooms over the printshop. Good thing there's places like that. Our need for meeting places is getting bigger.”

“Soon as they get Joseph and the twelve moved into their offices in the temple things will open up for us. Meanwhile, the men come first.”

“It will be soon?”

“Before the winter's out, at the rate the building's going on.”

Jenny left the buggy at the livery stable and the pair walked the short distance to the printing office.

As soon as they entered the meeting hall over the pressroom, Jenny realized Emma was in one of her unpleasant moods. With a sigh she whispered to Sarah, “Looks like no sewing today. Shall we wager the subject she has on her mind?”

“I just object to her personal questions. For the past month she's been after information. Everyone is squirming.”

“Why? Certainly there's nothing to worry about.” Astonishment was in Sarah's eyes, “You haven't heard—” but before she could finish, Sally approached.

“I hope you've been keeping a tight ship,” she cautioned Sarah and Jenny. “Emma's got everyone on the carpet today.

“You've heard all the outrageous things Dr. Bennett's been saying—that horrible confession Joseph insisted he make before the brethren in the Masonic Hall. Andy says the men were ready to take him apart, limb by limb when Joseph started pleading for him. So much for that confession. That man's going to be—” she gulped as Emma Smith approached.

“Sally, my dear, must we have gossip? Are you really criticizing the Prophet for moving with compassion and interest in the salvation of one soul? Joseph will be here in just a few minutes. Will you women please be seated?”

She turned away. Before Jenny had time to react to Sarah's raised eyebrows, Joseph came into the room. Jenny felt the excitement sweep through the room. She felt it touch herself even as she studied the faces of the women around her. Sarah Pratt was the only woman not viewing the Prophet with eyes filled with adoration. That troubled Jenny as she settled herself to listen to Joseph.

Wearing a slight frown, Joseph was terse, to the point. “All of you women have heard of the confessions of Dr. Bennett. I consider you representative of the city's virtuous women. I've come to beg your help. The disclosures Dr. Bennett has made are a reflection upon his character, but they will be damaging to the virtue of this city and to the Saints who are living their religion and seeking to please God.

“Remember, a little tale will travel many miles, and it can set the world on fire, particularly our world. I urge you, my dear Saints, please listen to me. At the present time a truth involving the guilty must not be aired. We are attempting to hold our influence with the world, and spare ourselves extermination. The brethren wish me to caution you to be prudent, wise, virtuous. If there is a need to repent, then reform, and do so in a way which will not destroy those about you.” With a quick wave of his hand, the Prophet was gone and the room was silent.

Jenny was aware only of Emma's stern gaze. Although the woman was studying every person in the room, Jenny felt as if she were on trial. All too clearly she was remembering Emma's interruption the evening Jenny approached Joseph in his office while Mark was in England. Today Emma was wearing that same expression.

Sarah and Jenny walked down to the street together. When Orson arrived Jenny watched him bundle his wife and son into the buggy before she made up her mind. She turned back to the printing office, saying, “I'll just pick up a copy of the
Book of Abraham
while I'm here.”

Jenny could hear the press running as she stepped through the doorway. The door leading into the pressroom was open and Jenny walked toward it.

Willard Richards and Mrs. Hyde were facing the press. Just as Jenny stepped forward, Mrs. Hyde slipped her arms around the man's shoulders and lifted her face. Jenny watched the kiss and all the implications burned through her. She started to turn and bumped against the table.

Nancy Hyde dropped her arms and turned with a smile. “Oh, sorry, I didn't hear you.” The smile faded and she studied Jenny with a quizzical look. “You've been listening to Joseph's talk?”

“Yes,” Jenny said slowly. “About—I thought it was all gossip.”

“Remember what he said,” Nancy replied sharply. “The Prophet's interested in keeping things nice and smooth around Nauvoo. Now, what do you want?”