Music of the Heart (15 page)

to go toe to toe with the execs if they give us any shit about it.”

“I’m still your mother, and I say no.”

A tormented sob choked off in my throat. I gripped the phone tight against my ear as I tried to hold

my emotions and sanity in check. “But we don’t have that much time left together. How can you be so

fucking cruel and deny me one moment with you?”

“Jacob, your language is absolutely atrocious!” she chided.

“Stop it! I don’t wanna hear about the wrong I’m doing, okay?”

“Look, these are hard times on everyone, sweetheart. There are a lot of people who work for you

and they depend on you and so do their families.” When I started to protest, she sighed. “I’m a mess

right now, honey—both emotionally and physically. I don’t want you seeing me like this. Before I

knew for sure if it was terminal, I started treatment again just in case. It’s wrecked me. So give me a

few weeks, okay?” At her sniffling, I broke down myself. “Sweetheart, I want more than anything to

have a month or two just to be your mother and take care of you before you have to take care of me.”

Tears streamed down my cheeks when I thought about everything she was going through just to

have time to be a mom to me. “Why do you have to be like this?”

She chuckled. “Jacob, it’s that stubbornness that we both share, remember?”

“I love you…God, do I love you,” I blubbered.

“I know, baby. As high as the sky, remember?”

I was crying so hard I couldn’t respond. Even though she couldn’t see me, I bobbed my head in

acknowledgement of the phrase she had taught me as a child.

You know how much I love you, Jacob?

As high as the sky, Mama!

That’s right, sweet boy.

“Jacob,” my mother began in the soft, soothing voice she’d used since I was a child. “I know it’s

hard, but try to put all this behind you. Focus on your music. Find escape in it, and for the next three

weeks, give your audiences the best shows you possibly can. And each night you do, rest assured that

you’re making me proud for your strength and courage.”

With the backs of my hands, I tried wiping off the tear-stained, snot-filled mess my face had

become. “Okay, I’ll try.”

“That’s my boy. I’ll call you each and every day.”

“You better.”

“I will. I love you, honey.”

“I love you too.”

And with that she was gone. Doubling over, I rested my palms on my knees. My body heaved and

shook as I tried to get myself together.

“Jake?”

Pinching my eyes shut, I willed her to go away. I couldn’t deal with her period, especially not like

this. “Not now,” I muttered.

She snaked her arms around my waist. “Baby, what’s wrong?” Bree crooned into my ear.

“Shit that you wouldn’t possibly understand. Besides, I just told you I don’t wanna fucking talk

about it, okay?”

Slinking around me, Bree tucked her finger under my chin and forced me to look at her. “Oh Jake,

you look like hell.”

“Thanks,” I grunted.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t make it yesterday. Trust me, if you’re going to get like this when I go away,

I’ll just quit my job,” she teased.

“You barely work as it is. It’s a wonder you don’t get fired as much as you call in.”

She laughed. “That’s the perk of working for your granddaddy’s towing service. It’s hard to fire

family.”

“Whatever.”

“Besides, he likes being able to tell everyone that I’m cutting off work to go hang-out with Jake

Slater of Runaway Train.”

I fought the urge to say that her grandfather was pretty sketchy to enjoy the fact she was a glorified

groupie, joining up with me at different tour stops.

Bree’s tongue flicked across my earlobe, causing me to shiver. “I could work on you full-time.

Cause trust me baby, it’s a buzzkill having a real job that keeps me away from you and that fantastic

cock of yours,” she drawled. The lust in her voice caused my traitorous dick to twitch.

“Is that right?”

“Mmm, hmm.” A cat-like smile curved on her lips. “You miss me?”

The truth was I hadn’t. Sure, I missed the sex, but there would never, ever be anything stronger

between me and Bree. But I desperately needed an emotional escape right now, and the only thing I

could think of was screwing my problems out of my mind. “Yeah, I did.”

“Hmm, wanna show me how much when we get back on the bus?”

“Yeah, but first I need to get fucked up.”

She chuckled. “It’s barely ten o’clock, Jake.”

“I don’t give a shit. Go tell your dad I want his flask—the one with the good stuff in it.”

“Okaaay, if you say so.” She ran her hands up my chest. “Just don’t get too wasted where you can’t

make me scream at least three times.”

I forced a smile to my lips. “Now why would I want to do that?”

***

I could only push around the food on my plate after Jake refused to sit at my table. I tried reasoning

that it wasn’t really a slight against me. Maybe he needed some space after AJ’s dig about our writing

session or maybe he wanted time with the roadies and crew. He’d obviously already opened up to me

far more than with anyone else, so I guess he needed time to process it all. I had to remember that I

would be a total bitch if I laid too much fault with him considering he was going through hell right

now with his mother’s illness.

We’d barely known each other twenty-four hours, so he didn’t owe me anything. But deep down,

his behavior pierced through my heart to sting my soul. If I allowed myself, I could really feel

something for him—something more than sympathy or compassion. I could even maybe grow to…like

him.

When I saw Jake fly out of his chair and storm out of the diner, it took everything within me not to

go after him. Instead, I tried focusing on Brayden’s stories about his children or how Rhys’s parents

had almost disowned him after he gave up his Ivy-League background to pursue life with the band. AJ

remained conspicuously silent, and from time to time, I would cut my eyes to catch him staring at me.

As we started back to the bus, he grabbed my arm. When I turned back, his expression was pained.

“You’re starting to like Jake, aren’t you?”

“No! Why would you ask such a thing?”

The corners of his lips quirked up in a sly grin. “Call it my Latin intuition.”

“Wait, I thought it was supposed to be Irish institution.”

“Are you saying we Mexicans can’t have it too?”

A relieved giggle escaped my lips. “Yeah, I guess you can.”

AJ laughed. “Whatever it is, I meant what I said.” When I started to protest, he held up his hand.

“You know, it’s crazy, but after I met you, I thought I might try to be a one- woman-man for a while.

See if your angelic nature couldn’t tame me.” He winked to which I rolled my eyes but laughed in

spite of myself. “But after last night and this morning, I realized there isn’t any point.” As the wind

whipped the long strands of my hair into my face, AJ reached over and pushed it away. “I could go all

medieval and fight for you, but there’s no point. You and Jake seem to have this magnetic pull.”

Before I could stop myself, I gave a mirthless laugh. “Yeah, well, I call bullshit on your little

magnetic theory considering he steered right past my table this morning. Not to mention he let that

waitress from the diner…” Warmth flooded my cheeks as I realized I’d said too much.

AJ shook his head. “This morning was my fault for giving Jake shit about the songwriting. And the

waitress…well, you got him worked up, and I’m sure she was more than willing to take care of it for

him because he’s Jake Slater of Runaway Train, not because he’s Jake this good-looking guy who has

a lot of unattractive demons he’s dealing with.”

Glancing down, I scuffed my boots against the uneven pavement. “Look, AJ, I appreciate your

honesty, but I don’t think anything is going to happen with me and Jake.” Before he could say anything

else, I held up my hand. “And nothing is happening with you either. I want us to stay friends, okay?”

“Of course, Angel. Anything you want.” He then wrapped his arm around my shoulder and led me

to the bus. Frank and Brayden stood in the galley while Rhys was sprawled out on the couch.

“Okay, I’m going to make a quick grocery run, and then we’ll get back on the road,” Frank said. He

glanced around the inside of the bus. “Where’s Jake? I thought he might like to go with me?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen him since breakfast,” Brayden replied.

Frank grimaced. “Lemme go look for him.”

Brayden exchanged a knowing glance with Frank. “I’ll come with you.”

While they went in search of Jake, AJ glanced at me. “Wanna play some video games, Angel?”

I wrinkled my nose. “No thanks, I think I’m good. I’ll do a little studying.”

“Suit yourself.” AJ shoved Rhys’s legs off the couch. “You down to get your ass whipped, dude?”

“Yeah, right, douchebag. You know I wipe the floor with you each and every time,” Rhys replied.

As they settled in for a raucous Call of Duty marathon, I headed down the hall to the bedroom. I

dug out my giant study packet for my nursing exam along with some of my books from my suitcase. I

came back to the living area and plopped down. I lounged on the couch, balancing my opened

Anatomy and Physiology book on my knees while AJ and Rhys shouted obscenities at each other’s

game characters.

Fifteen minutes passed before a red-faced and out-of-breath Brayden appeared. He stalked up the

stairs, muttering something under his breath. After flopping down across from me, he jerked up the

magazine on the table. With his shaky hands, I could tell he was pissed about something.

It was then Jake staggered up the bus stairs with a leggy, dark-haired goddess. I couldn’t help but

gasp as pain crisscrossed through my chest. The sight of him with another girl—one that I couldn’t

possibly compete with when it came to sex appeal—caused me to heave in a few desperate breaths.

The knife I felt that was wedged in my chest twisted further at the sight of him so wasted. The Jake

swaying to and fro in front of me wasn’t the Jake I’d held as he cried or the one who I had made

music with this morning. But it hurt just as bad that he had forgotten my very existence. Almost too

quickly to believe, he had cemented back up any of his walls I’d managed to break down.

Good one, Abby. You actually thought by comforting Jake and writing a song with him he would