Music of the Heart (14 page)

yourself. For my brothers and me, it was learning to play instruments and song writing. For my mom,

it was books.”

Sweeping the pencil from behind my ear, I momentarily nibbled on the eraser. “Hmm, so even if

death is the fucker stealing my girl, I still think most of the lyrics I’ve got will work. They just need

some tweaking. And I definitely think the melody will work.” I adjusted the guitar on my lap. “What

do you think of this?” I asked before strumming a few chords.

Closing her eyes, Abby let the music wash over her. “Wow, that’s good. It has a real haunting

quality to it.”

“You think?”

When she opened her eyes, I peered intently at her. Normally, I didn’t want or need any convincing

about my creations except from the suits at the label. But this time, I desperately wanted reassurance

from Abby. “Yes, I do. Even setting aside what I know about the song’s meaning, I want to cry just

hearing the music, and you haven’t even added the lyrics yet.”

“Thank you. Give me a few minutes, okay?”

“Sure.” While she went to pour the glass of orange juice I had suggested, I reworked the lyrics.

When I was satisfied I had the emotions right where I wanted them, I put my pencil down. I don’t

know how long I had been focusing on the song. It must have been a while because Abby’s glass of

juice was empty. She sat patiently in front of me.

“Ready?”

She nodded.

Focusing on Abby, I sang the lyrics with everything I had in me. Tears sparkled in her blue eyes

before running down her cheeks. “Oh Jake,” she murmured.

“You think that’s it?”

Her hand clutched the place above her heart. “It’s breathtaking.” We sat there staring at each other

for a minute before Abby finally wiped her moist eyes. Then a tiny shudder went through her, and she

gasped.

“Are you okay?”

Without answering me, Abby rose out of her chair. “Where are you going?” I asked.

“To get my guitar. It’s probably nothing, but I just had an idea.”

I grabbed her arm. “No, no, I’ll get it.”

“But—”

I held up my hand to silence her. “Angel, Rhys is notorious for sleeping in the buff, and I don’t

think your virgin eyes are quite ready for that.”

Crimson splotches dotted her cheeks, and she didn’t argue with me. I then hurried down the bus

aisle. On his stomach, Rhys snored like a bear while his bare ass stuck out from the covers. Just as I

suspected, he would have given her quite an eye-full.

Before Abby got out her guitar, she tore a sheet of paper from my notepad. I couldn’t help asking,

“Are you thinking you can do it better?”

She shook her head furiously. “No, no, I was thinking of a way to enhance it.” At what I could only

imagine was my intensely skeptical expression, she added, “It needs both sides of the story—his and

hers.”

“A duet?”

“Yes. Now be quiet for a minute.”

I chuckled as Abby began scribbling down words. “Angel, have you ever even written a song

before?”

“Nuh-uh,” she muttered lost in concentration. After a few minutes, she finally glanced up at me and

gave a sheepish grin. “I’ve watched the boys do it forever, but I never tried. But for some reason,

today it’s like… it’s just coming to me.”

“Like you couldn’t stop it if you tried?”

Her eyes widened. “Yes, just like that.”

I smiled. “I think the muse has found its way to you.”

“Hmm, I dunno,” she murmured.

Motioning towards the paper, I urged, “Come on, let’s hear it.”

Her brow creased as she nibbled her lip. “You won’t laugh, right?”

“Of course not.”

“Promise.”

I crossed my finger over my chest. “Scout’s Honor.”

“Okay.” Bending over, she took her guitar out of the case and adjusted it on her lap. She then

mirrored the melody I had written earlier with almost absolute perfection.

Baby, it breaks my heart to have to leave you here—shattered and alone.

With no one to pick up the pieces or ease the ache that you own.

There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you or for your love

Each and every moment I had with you was an amazing gift from above.

I’ll wrap the memories around me like a blanket as this winter crushes my soul.

And although I can’t stay, I’ll keep you with me each and every day.

When she finished singing, she kept strumming the melody. I could tell she was having a hard time

making herself look at me. Finally, she dared a little peek.

“That is fucking amazing!”

“Seriously?”

“Hell yeah. We have to record this together.”

Her fingers slipped on the chords, making a screeching noise on the guitar. “You’re joking, right?”

“No, I’m completely and totally serious. This has chart topper written all over it.”

With her blue eyes widening in fear, Abby shook her head furiously back and forth. “But I’ve

never been in a recording booth. This is an important song, so you need someone with more

experience who can do it justice.”

I leaned forward to take her hand in mine. “I wouldn’t have even written the damn thing if it hadn’t

been for you. As for a better singer, I can’t imagine finding one.” Giving her a reassuring smile, I

added, “Besides, I don’t want to do the song unless I can do it with you.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, so quit arguing with me about it.”

She grinned. “Okay, but only if you insist.”

“Why don’t we try meshing both parts together now?”

“That sounds good.”

As Abby and I ran through the song a few times, the other guys started coming to life. Brayden

waved at us before hopping in the shower while Rhys appeared clothed and with his blonde hair

perfectly styled.

Without a word to us, he eased down at the table and listened intently. Closing his eyes a few

times, I could tell he was imagining how to play his part. “That’s kickass, bro,” he said when we

finished.

I glanced up from my guitar to wink at Abby. She rewarded me with a beaming smile that caused

the cutest dimple in her cheek to appear. “You think so?” I asked.

“Oh yeah. Chicks are going to cream the hell out of themselves at the whole angsty thing you got

going on about fighting for the woman you love.”

“I thought so too. Think the other guys will dig it?”

Rhys bobbed his head. “Bray’s gonna want it as acoustic as possible to bring out all the emotions.

You know what a sap he is.”

I laughed. “I agree—about both the acoustic and Brayden being a pussy.”

Before Abby could give me shit about the word she hated most, AJ staggered out of his roost and

down the aisle towards us. “What are you douchebags doing up so early?” he asked. His hand, like on

autopilot, went to his crotch to do an obligatory ball scratch and then his eyes widened when he

realized Abby was at the table too. “My bad,” he muttered under his breath.

Although she ducked her head, I caught the grin that fluttered on her lips at AJ’s actions.

“It’s almost nine. We’re stopping for breakfast in a few minutes,” I replied.

AJ groaned and rubbed his face. “Nine? Jesus, it might as well be the asscrack of dawn.”

Abby laughed. “Let me guess. Not a morning person?”

“Hell no.” His gaze then fell on the notepad and our guitars. “Whoa, hold the phone. Don’t tell me

you guys were songwriting?”

“Yeah, we just wrote a duet. Isn’t that amazing?” Abby gushed.

AJ’s dark brows shot into his hairline before his eyes locked on mine. Even though I felt like an

absolute pussy, I squirmed under the intensity of his stare. Mainly because I knew my secret was

about to be out of the bag, and it was going to change things even more with Abby.

With a smirk, AJ crossed his arms over his broad chest. “Oh yeah, it’s more than just amazing. It’s

fucking incredible considering this dude never,
ever
lets anyone in on his writing sessions. I mean,

even he and Bray don’t collaborate together—each of them just writes his own part and then they

merge it together.”

Abby stared at me in utter disbelief. “But I…I didn’t know. You should’ve told me you wanted

privacy or that—”

“No, it’s fine,” I muttered, glancing out the picture window as we pulled off the interstate.

“You say that now, but just wait until Bray hears about this,” AJ said. He thumped me on the back.

“Of course, I can’t say I blame you. Who wouldn’t want to make music with Angel?”

AJ’s words had the same effect as pulling a dark, heavy cloak across my raw and open emotions.

Whatever openness and honesty Abby had coaxed out of me automatically shut down. My mother’s

advice echoed in my ear about giving Abby a chance and how fate could’ve brought us together. Her

words coupled with what had happened last night and this morning made my throat close up, and I

fought to breathe. Without another word, I whirled out of my seat and stomped down the aisle to the

bedroom. I flung open the door to find Brayden getting dressed. “Where’s the fire, man?” he asked.

“Nowhere. We just need to hurry the fuck up and eat so we can get back on the road.”

Bray gave me a funny look before leaving me in the bedroom. Once I slid on my jeans and threw

on a clean shirt, I didn’t go back out into the living room until I was sure we were about to be parked.

When the bus finally shuddered to a stop, I couldn’t get off of it fast enough. I didn’t say anything to

Abby or the guys. I couldn’t take being with Abby one more minute. Her very presence had sent tiny

fissures through my carefully constructed wall of emotions. She was getting to me too fast and too

soon. No woman but my mother had ever seen through to the real me, and I wasn’t about to let Abby

in.

So I hauled ass down the bus steps and started powerwalking across the parking lot.

“Jake?” Brayden called.

“He must have to piss or something,” Rhys replied.

Ignoring them, I threw open the diner door and craned my neck for the bathroom. Once inside, I

splashed water on my face and tried to get my bearings. An image flashed before my eyes—one that

had an almost identical purity as Abby’s. Her name was Stephanie, and she had been my first and

only love. I’d been eighteen when I first met her—she apprenticed under my mother at the dance

studio. We dated for two years before I made the decision to drop out of college and go on the road

with the guys. When I couldn’t give her the commitment she needed, she didn’t just break up with me

—she tore my heart to shreds.

Of course, the songs I wrote from that hellish experience propelled Runaway Train to stardom. I

hadn’t opened myself up to another girl since then, and I sure as hell couldn’t now with everything in

my world spinning out of control. I couldn’t let the feelings I was experiencing for Abby take hold.

After collecting myself as best I could, I left the bathroom and headed for the breakfast buffet.

Filling my plate to the brim, I then turned and went in search of somewhere to sit. At the sight of Abby

seated with the other guys, I quickly side-stepped their table to plop down with Frank and some of the

roadies. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Abby’s quizzical expression turn almost wounded.

Her reaction caused me to spear my French toast with a little more determination than I should

have. Yeah, I was a bastard for ignoring her after everything we had been through the night before and

this morning. But I couldn’t keep opening up to her and feeling what I did. It had fucking train wreck

written all over it.

“You okay today?” Frank asked.

“Fine,” I muttered through my bacon.

“Jake…”

“I don’t want to talk about it, okay?”

“Okay, son.” After taking a thoughtful sip of his coffee, he drew in a ragged breath. “Just so you

know, your mom called me this morning.”

I choked on my orange juice. After succumbing to a coughing fit, I questioned, “She did?”

Frank nodded. “She knows that Sally called you, and she wanted me to make sure I kept an eye out

for you. She’s afraid you’ll be…destructive.”

The agonizing thought of my mom dying once again sliced through to my soul, and I fought to

breathe. Nausea crashed over me, and I feared I was about to heave up my breakfast. I knew I had to

talk to her again. So I tumbled out of my chair and sprinted out of the diner. When she answered the

phone, I demanded, “Why?”

Mama sighed. “I thought it was for the best.”

“You thought not telling your only child that you’re dying is for the best? Do you know how sick

and warped that is?”

“I didn’t want to upset you with just a few weeks left on your tour.”

A frustrated growl came from low in my throat. “For once, would you stop putting me and

everyone else first? This is the time to be fucking selfish. I mean, you’re…” Closing my eyes, I still

couldn’t bring myself to say the words again.

“Honey, there will be plenty of time for us to say our goodbyes when you get off the road.”

“Fuck that. I’m coming home now.”

“No, Jacob, you’re not.”

“Look, the guys are all in agreement. Hell, Rhys is even ready to use what little law school he had