My Enemy, the Queen (11 page)

It was into this atmosphere that the scandal burst. It was like the reopening of an old wound. It touched the Queen almost as surely as it did Robert, and it showed clearly how wise she had been not to marry him, though of course if she had, this man, John Appleyard, would never have dared raise his voice.

The fact was that Amy Robsart half-brother, John Appleyard, had for some time been spreading the scandal that when Robert Dudley had arranged for his wife to be murdered, he had helped cover up the crime and that, his conscience now worrying him, he felt he should confess his guilt.

Robert enemies, headed by the Duke of Norfolk, were quick to make the most of this. They took up the case and declared that John Appleyard must tell his story in a court of law.

There was a campaign of persecution and everyone was saying that Leicester brief glory was over.

Elizabeth talked to me about the scandal. She always watched me closely when Robert name was mentioned and I wondered if I had betrayed anything.

hat think you, Cousin Lettice, of this matter?she asked. orfolk and some of his friends seem to think that Robert should be made to answer these charges against him.

think they are like vultures, Madam,I said.

ultures indeed! You speak as though the Earl of Leicester were a rotting corpse.

e is without your favor now, Madam, and though his body may appear to be in good health, it is his spirit which is dying.

e not food for the vultures yet, I promise you. Was he concerned in this murder, do you think?

our Majesty knowledge of the matter would, as in all others, be greater than my own.

I often marveled at my own temerity. One of these days my tongue would carry me into disaster. Fortunately she had not seen the significance behind that remark or if she did ignored it.

e must be watchful of our enemies, Lettice,she said, nd I think Robin are gathering around him fast.

fear so, but he is strong and will confute them, I doubt not.

e miss Robert Dudley at our Court,she said wistfully. hat think you, Lettice?

think Your Majesty does indeed miss him.

nd some of my women miss him too, doubtless.

That piercing lookhat did it mean? What did she know? How would she act if she discovered we had been lovers? She would brook no rivals. And I had lain with him behind locked doors and broken my marriage vows. The Queen wrath would be terrible.

She did not pursue the subject, but I knew she went on thinking of Robert.

He was in danger now. If Appleyard swore in a court of justice that Robert Dudley had bribed him to cover up the murder of his wife, he would be finished. Even the Queen could not condone a murder.

It was like her to act precisely at the right moment.

She sent for him to come to Court.

He came, looking pale and not quite his arrogant self. I was there with other women in the tiring chamber when he was announced. The change in her was miraculous. It made my heart sink, for it was clear that she was as much in love with him as ever.

He was to be brought to her, she said.

She sat admiring her reflection in the mirror, considering for a moment whether she would choose a different dress; but that would mean delay and she was extravagantly clad enough as it was. She took the rouge pad and applied a little to her cheek. The color seemed to add a sparkle to her eyes, but perhaps that was due to the prospect of seeing Robert.

Then she went to the chamber in which she would receive him.

I heard her say: o you have come to me, at last, you rogue. I want an account of this desertion. Think not Il brook such treatment.

But her voice was soft and shaken with emotion; and he came forward and, taking her hands, kissed them fervently.

I heard her whisper: y Eyes my Sweet Robin

She noticed me then.

eave us!she snapped.

I had to go, but I went angry, hurt and humiliated. He had not as much as glanced at me.

He was back, and in greater favor than ever. She wanted an account of this scoundrel Appleyard. He had taken gifts from the Earl of Leicester, it seemed, and had made no complaint at the time. It was finally drawn from him that he had been offered bribes to circulate these stories and, said the Queen, for such criminal action he deserved to be punished.

This was one of those occasions when Elizabeth showed her wisdom. John Appleyard had been guilty of lying and trying to incriminate the Earl of Leicester; but she had no wish to pursue the matter. John Appleyard should be given a warning that it would go hard for him if he were ever caught in such conduct again. Now he must thank the Queen for her clemency and his God for his good fortune, for the matter was to be dropped, and no one was to hear more about the death of the Earl wife.

This was certainly high favor. Robert was always at her side. He gave me a few helpless glances as though to say: I feel the same towards you as ever, but what can I do? The Queen keeps me with her.

The fact was that he had so much to lose now if he was discovered in a liaison, and he was not prepared to risk it. That was the difference in our natures. I was. I became fretful and dissatisfied, and I had many a slap from the Queen because, as she said, she would have no glowering creature about her.

She was worried. Robert experiences had had their effect on his health, and, having caught a chill, he was confined to his bed.

How anxious we wereoth of us. And how frustrated I was, for she could visit him and I could not. I schemed perpetually, trying to discover some way of reaching himut it was no use.

She went to him, though, and came back complaining that his apartments were damp.

e must select others,she said; and it struck me that there was something ominous in the manner in which she addressed her remarks to me.

Those she chose were next to her own.

It became clear that she had noticed something between Robert and me because when he recovered a little she sent for me.

am going to send you back to Chartley,she said.

I must have looked stricken and shown that I felt sick with frustration.

have kept you too long from your husband,she went on.

ut, Madam,I protested, e is often away from home on your service.

hen he comes back to Chartley he must find a warm bed waiting for him. I dareswear he thinks it is time you gave him a bonny son.

The shrewd eyes were studying me intently.

t is not good for lusty partners in marriage to be separated for too long,she continued. here could be mischief such as I do not care to see in my Court. Come, cheer up. Think of your home and your children.

shall miss Your Majesty.

our family must make up for anything you miss at Court.

My mother was at Court and I went to tell her that I was to leave.

She nodded. es, the Queen has spoken to me. She thinks you are of a nature to need marriage and that it is unwise for you to be kept from your husband for too long. She said that she had noticed lewd looks in the eyes of some people as they rested on you.

id she say whose eyes?

My mother shook her head. he mentioned no names.

So she knew something. She had seen, and she was dismissing me, for she would not tolerate a rival.

Sadly, angrily, I left for Chartley. Robert made no effort to say goodbye. He was clearly determined not to jeopardize his return to favor.

I began to wonder how far he had used me to arouse the Queen jealousy. To a woman of my nature that was maddening. I was enraged that in so using me he had brought about my banishment from Court.

I should have hated him. I was nothing to him but a means of gratifying a temporary passion.

I had been a fool.

One day, I promised myself, I will make them both realize that I cannot be treated in this way.

So it was back to Chartley, and how depressed I was as I rode north! How I hated the sight of that stone fortress perched on the hill which was to be my home, for how long I could not say!

My parents had spoken to me before I left Courtnd how I envied them for being able to stay there!y father as Treasurer of the Royal Household and my mother as one of the bedchamber women.

t is time you went back to Chartley, Lettice,said my father. oo long a stay at Court is not good for young people if they are married.

ou must have missed Walter and the children,added my mother.

I retorted that I should not see a great deal of Walter at Chartley in any case.

o, but he will be there whenever he can, and think of the joy of being with the little girls.

It was true that I should be glad to see the children, but they could not make up for the excitement of Court.

I was depressed for the first days thinking of Robert and wondering what was happening between him and the Queen. The recent estrangement had certainly not made her less fond, and I often wondered whether my deductions had been correct and her affections for him would, in the end, overcome her objections.

I began to ask myself whether she had mentioned me to him. I could picture his denial of anything between us and, if it should be proved against him, assuring her that it was nothing but a temporary diversion because she continually denied him his heart desire. I vowed that one day I would make him pay for his treatment of me. I would make him realize that I was not to be taken up and thrown aside at his convenience. But when my anger cooled I had to accept its futility. There was nothing I could do at this time so I sought solace with my family, and strangely enough I found it.

Penelope was in her sixth year beautiful child, bright and willful. I could see myself in her very clearly. Dorothy, a year younger, was quieter, but nonetheless determined to have her own way. They, at least, were delighted to see me; and my parents had been right when they said they would bring me consolation.

Walter came to Chartley. He had served with Ambrose Dudley, Earl of Warwick, with whom he had become very friendly. I was interested to hear of Warwick because he was Robert elder brother and had been under sentence of death with him in the Tower of London for involvement in the attempt to put Lady Jane Grey on the throne.

Walter was as loving as he had been in the early days of our marriage, and as for myself I was nonetheless attractive for having extended my experience. But how different he was from Robert, and how I railed against fate for marrying me to Walter Devereux when there was a man like Robert Dudley in the world.

However, my nature being what it was, I was able to derive some pleasure from my relationship with Walter, and at least he was devoted to me.

It was not long before I was pregnant.

his time,said Walter, t will be a boy.

We went to one of Walter country housesetherwood in Herefordshirehich he thought would be more healthy for me, and there on a dark November day my child was born. I must confess to a great exultation when I learned it was a boy. Walter was delighted and ready to indulge me for giving him that which, like most men, he most desired son and heir.

The question arose of what we should call him. Walter suggested that he should be named Richard after his father, or possibly Walter, after himself. But I said I should like to get away from family names, and I had a fancy for the name of Robert; and as Walter was ready to please me that became the boy name.

I was delighted with him, for from the start he was a most handsome child, bright and clearly intelligent. Oddly enoughand I surprised myself in this became absorbed by him; he helped to soothe my hurt and, wonder of wonders, I ceased to fret for the Court.

Eight years passed before I saw Robert Dudley again, and a great deal had happened in the world during that time.

The Years of Banishment

My Lord of Leicester is very much with her Majesty, and she shows him the same great good affection she was wont. There are two sisters now in the Court, that are very far in love with him, so they long have beeny Lady Sheffield and Frances Howard; they, striving who shall love him best, are at great wars with each other, and the Queen thinketh not well of them and not the better of him. For this reason there are spies set over him.

Gilbert Talbot to his father Lord Shrewsbury

My son had changed the household. His sisters doted on him and all the servants adored him; his father was inordinately proud of him and, oddest of all, I wanted nothing more at that time than to care for him. I would not leave him to his nurses, because I could not bear that they might take his affection from me.

At this time, Walter had every reason to be very content with his marriage. I often thought of Robert Dudley with longing, but, being away from him, I was able to look the facts straight in the face. They were not very palatable for a woman of my pride.

Robert Dudley had made me his mistress temporarily because he was out of favor with the Queen, and as soon as she had beckoned him it was oodbye, Lettice. It would be unwise for us to meet again.

My pride was as strong as my physical needs. I was going to try to forget that episode. My familynd in particular my adored sonould help me to do so. I threw myself into the management of my household and for a time became a model wife. I spent some hours in my stillroom. I grew a variety of herbs which my servants used for flavoring dishes and I was constantly trying something new. I made perfumes from lavender, roses and hyacinths; I found new ways of mingling fragrant wild flowers with rushes and frequently used meadowsweet, which the Queen had made fashionable because she had once said it reminded her of the country. I sent for fine clothsrocades, velvet and grogramhich made my servants goggle-eyed, accustomed as they were to fustian and kersey. My seamstresses were good but of course could not catch the stylish mode of the Court. Never mind! I was a queen in the country and people talked of mef my elegance, of my table, of the wines I gave to my guestsuscatel, malmsey and those from Italy which I served with my own spices. When visitors came from Court I tried to impress them. I wanted them to return and talk to me that he might know that I could live very satisfactorily without him.