Nurse Trudie is Engaged (2 page)

“
Thinking of Ursula aren
’
t you?
”
John said slowly.
“
I wouldn
’
t worry too much there. If Sinclair thought you were the right man for the job that
’
s all there is to it. I don
’
t think Ursula would make any difference. I
’
m not saying she won
’
t have talked to her uncle,
”
he continued.
“
But I think she knows she
’
s been chasing a rainbow these past six months. She
’
ll be looking around for someone else more amenable to management than you
’
ve been,
”
he ended.

“
What
’
s the matter with me?
”
Philip demanded suddenly, whirling around on his friend.
“
Anyone else would be grateful to have a sweet person like Ursula taking an interest in their lives, in their career
... but I resent being
... managed. That was your word, but that
’
s how I feel life would be where a person like Ursula was concerned.
”

“
Those are the sort of women who help men get to the top of their chosen tree,
”
John said sagely.
“
Not like my Sally, bless her heart. So long as we can carry on here, she nursing, me with my own job, helping folks to get well again as she puts it, she
’
s happy as the day is long. But the Ursulas of the world know the right people to meet, the right dinner parties to attend and to give, the works—
”

“
I don
’
t want a woman like that,
”
Philip interrupted moodily.
“
Nor do I want a shallow, empty creature who thinks my work
’
s a bore and ought to finish at set hours and on set days. I don
’
t know what I want,
”
he ended abruptly, half-laughing at himself,
“
except that I
’
m inclined to agree now with what you said earlier today; it
is
time I married and settled down. But who on earth do I find to marry around here? I want someone like your Sally, but more my style, if you know what I mean.
”

“
But there
’
s only one Sally,
”
John broke in, grinning again.
“
Sorry, old man, I
’
ve collared the model. You
’
ll have to find your own. You will if you look hard enough ... and remember it was Matron who introduced Sally to me!
”

“
Matron!
”
Philip glanced at his watch and groaned.
“
I
’
d forgotten. I
’
m due to see her at two-thirty and it
’
s almost that now. See you later, Johnny boy. See what you can do toward solving my problem
... find a relative of Sally
’
s or something. Then I can ... settle down, as you call it, and work in peace!
”
With a wave of his hand he was out of the room and on his way to tap at Matron
’
s door.

Sandra Rice, Matron of the Fellfield General Hospital, looked up with a smile as the doctor was shown into her office. She liked this young man very much. He was clever—brilliant, she would have said—unassuming, quiet and kind, gentle with his patients and willing to exhaust himself in order to help anyone, no matter who they were. She glanced at him now, seated opposite her, abruptly aware of the sense of tension he carried with him despite the outward show of being completely at ease.

“
I asked you to come and see me,
”
Matron began,
“
because it did occur to me that you may have some special requests to make regarding the nursing staff for the extension. These will have to be decided now so that everything can be arranged before the opening day in a month
’
s time. I may add,
”
she smiled,
“
that I
’
ve already received several requests for transfers, but naturally I would like to hear your own views first.
”

“
I only want an efficient staff, Matron,
”
Philip told her,
“
and all your nurses are efficient. Who does what doesn
’
t make an atom of difference to me, provided she
’
s efficient, as I
’
ve said, and enthusiastic.
”

“
All of them are well trained, Dr. Malham,
”
Matron affirmed.
“
As to their being enthusiastic, I can only say that most of those who have applied for transfer show a remarkable enthusiasm for the proposed change. I don
’
t know, of course,
”
her dark brown eyes twinkled at Philip in a conspiratorial manner,
“
how much of this enthusiasm is for the clean, fresh air of the countryside around Thrackwaite and how much is for the newly appointed senior consultant at the extension, but it
’
s there all right. Now, is there anyone you would especially like to have with you?
”

“
I can
’
t think of anyone at the moment,
”
Philip said truthfully.
“
To be candid, Matron, off duty I spend more time avoiding members of the staff here than I do in cultivating their acquaintance, apart from my direct colleagues, of course. Because of that I only know the nursing staff in and around the hospital, and I
’
m afraid I don
’
t know enough about anyone to make a choice.
”

“
I understand,
”
Matron said quietly, and so she did, she told herself; she understood only too well. From her position she observed most of what went on around the hospital and was aware of the almost blind adoration the majority of her nursing staff had for this handsome and brilliant young man. Because of this she could well appreciate how difficult it was for him to maintain a
quiet, friendly manner to each and every one of them and nothing more than that with any one in particular.

“
I could,
”
she pointed out,
“
send an entirely new staff to the extension. New to Fellfield, that is. We have a number of newcomers due to join us during the next four weeks or so, but I imagined you might like to see one or two familiar faces around you, perhaps one or two nurses whose work you have found particularly outstanding
... But if there isn
’
t anyone—
”

“
But there is.
”
The words were out almost before he had been aware of thinking them, and he had a sudden swift vision of the small, heart-shaped face of the woman he had praised earlier in the day, the woman who had worked in the operating room with him that morning. She had managed her job efficiently, quietly and without any fuss, seeming to know his requirements instinctively.

“
The staff nurse who assisted this morning,
”
he said crisply.
“
Her name is Hislop. She is one I would like with me, if you don
’
t mind. No particular reason,
”
he hastened to qualify his words,
“
except that she managed her job efficiently, quietly, and without any fuss—
”

Matron laughed, sensing his embarrassment at his own choice of words.

“
I hope none of my nurses fuss unnecessarily,
”
she said, still smiling.
“
Very well, Dr. Malham. I
’
ll have a word with Staff Sister Hislop, and if she would like to join you at the extension—
”

Her words were interrupted by the sharp shrilling of the telephone on her desk, and with a murmured
“
Excuse me
”
she picked up the instrument. A moment or so. later she looked across at Philip.

“
You
’
re wanted,
”
she said crisply, handing the instrument to him.
“
It
’
s urgent. A man has been injured loading heavy machinery over at Grainers. The ambulance men state severe internal injuries.
”

Philip was on his feet, ready for action arid eager to help. He paused briefly.

“
Nurse Hislop told me she was to go on off duty this afternoon,
”
he said quietly.
“
Do you think she could come to the operating room first?
”

“
I have no doubt it can be arranged,
”
Matron said primly, wondering as she began to dial briskly whether it was just Nurse Hislop
’
s work or her undoubtedly attractive and lovely face that lay behind the request. But Philip gave her no clue. With a brief
“
Thanks,
”
he was out of her office and on his way to change. Once she had made certain Trudie Hislop would be available Matron sat back for a few moments and allowed herself the luxury of a brief daydream.

“
They
’
re a medical family,
”
she was thinking of the Hislops,
“
and old Doctor Stephen is a dear. It would help compensate Trudie, too, for Garth
’
s death—
”
Then someone tapped on her door, and there was no time for further speculation.

Trudie was ready and waiting as Philip scrubbed up and prepared to operate. She had been startled by this unexpected summons, startled and more than pleased, because it was Philip who had requested her presence. Watching him as he waited for the anesthetic to take effect on the patient, Trudie thought how the others would envy her. Yet, she chided herself, they all knew how stupid and utterly foolish it would be to build anything out of this.

The operation was a long and complicated one, and Trudie watched, as she always did, fascinated by the skill of the surgeon, the sure, deft movements of his hands. At last it was all over and he could straighten his aching shoulders, turning for her to help him off with his coat.

“
Thank you again, Nurse,
”
he said, smiling down at her.
“
I think we have finished for the day now. I hope you
’
re not too disappointed at missing some of your off duty?
”

“
Not at all,
”
Trudie assured him gravely, then she smiled suddenly.
“
I won
’
t miss any of it,
”
she told him.
“
Matron added an extra day in compensation.
”

“
I
’
m glad,
”
Philip said sincerely; then he turned away and she was free to go.

Upstairs in the room she shared with Nurse Anderson, Trudie was preparing to leave, quietly thinking over the miracle of Philip
’
s sending for her, the wonder of working with him twice in one day. She was in no mood for chatter, but Mary Anderson was by no means sensitive to atmosphere and as soon as Trudie appeared, she wanted to know all about it.

“
I
’
ve never known him to ask for a particular nurse before,
”
Mary said wonderingly.
“
You must have made an impression this morning. What did you do? You couldn
’
t have fainted. Clarice Cole tried that, and all he did was order them to carry her out to recover.
”

“
I didn
’
t do anything
... except my duty to the best of my ability.
”
Trudie felt her words sounded prim and self-conscious, but Mary was too inquisitive to be critical.

“
Duty!
”
she scoffed.
“
That
’
s an outmoded word, even in a place like this. We
’
re all doing a job. We just happen to be nurses. But you could say anyone doing their own job
‘
to the best of their ability,
’
whether it
’
s typing, teaching, or anything else is doing their duty. No,
”
she shook her curly head,
“
I
’
m not standing for that as an explanation as to why he singled you out, Hislop, and that
’
s a fact. There must have been something more.
”

“
There wasn
’
t,
”
Trudie said honestly.
“
I just tried to think what instrument he
’
d be likely to
need next, what the next stages of the operation would be ... things like that. I suppose I made some lucky guesses. Anyhow, he seemed pleased. He thanked me for my help when he
’
d finished—
”

“
He
what
?”
Mary sat upright on her bed.
“
I
’
ve never heard of such a thing before,
”
she said in tones of great bewilderment.
“
Do you think he
’
s fallen for you?
”
she ended abruptly in a tone of awe.

“
Don
’
t be so silly.
”
Trudie
’
s tone was light, although her heart had begun to hammer at an alarming rate, and the little pulse at the base of her throat was beating as if fired by a motor.
“
He
’
s not the type. He doesn
’
t see nurses as people,
”
she went on thoughtfully.
“
I don
’
t believe he even sees women that way. We
’
re just an appendage to the work he has to do, a necessary part of the completion. Women themselves,
”
she was speaking more to herself than to Mary,
“
don
’
t appear to exist for him. I expect that
’
s because he
’
s had so little to do with them.
”

“
How do you mean?
”
Mary was curious.
“
He sees plenty of them around every day. There are hundreds in St. Catherine
’
s alone.
”

“
Sister Meredith was talking about him once,
”
Trudie said thoughtfully.
“
It
’
s some time ago now, and she wasn
’
t talking to me, but I
’
ve always remembered the conversation. It seemed to explain such a lot about him.
”

“
Such as?
”
Mary demanded.
“
Really, the way you tell a story, it
’
s a good job you don
’
t have to make your living at it! What is the explanation, and why should he be so different from other men? All the other doctors and specialists are friendly. That
’
s not the word I want—he
’
s friendly enough, but it
’
s in such an impersonal sort of way, as though the rest of us were just part of the equipment, not people at all—
”

“
I know,
”
Trudie interrupted.
“
It seems he sort of
... uses us, as he does the instruments, the oxygen unit, the rest of the works. I know exactly what you mean, and that
’
s what I
’
m trying to explain. His mother died when he was very young. His father and his uncle were both surgeons in partnership together. They brought him up in an all-male household, so Sister Meredith said. He went away to school, on to university, on to medical school and all the rest of it, but the atmosphere was mainly male. I think,
”
she ended with a sudden flash of insight,
“
he
’
s scared of women and the only defense he has is to treat us all as part of the hospital, nothing more.
”

“
Well, rather you than me.
”
Mary sighed and rose.
“
I
’
m due in Casualty in three minutes. Thank heaven for Doctor Stark!
”
she ended piously.

Trudie laughed. Doctor Andrew Stark was a young houseman, new to St. Catherine
’
s, who had, apparently, set many hearts awhirl. Mary was the current favorite, and apparently, Trudie realized, enjoying the sensation.

“
Don
’
t you go falling for his lordship,
”
Mary advised, turning at the door.
“
Better to stick to types like Andrew, at least we know where we are with them. Have a good week,
”
she ended. Then the door closed behind her and Trudie was left alone with her thoughts.

For a few minutes Trudie made no move. She was thinking how much of life was a game of pretense and wondering if other people found the same thing. As far back as she could remember there had always been something to pretend to other people. At school she had always pretended she did not mind when other people did better than she did, when she longed so passionately to outshine others and prove to herself and the family that girls were every bit as good as boys.

She had had to pretend that she did not mind being the only girl among four brothers. Although they loved her and always included her in whatever they were doing, she had been well aware that at times her sex was a handicap; and there were limits to which she could be included in some of their excursions and adventures.