Only the Strongest Survive (23 page)

Before they
stepped out, he put a restraint in his pocket. If Ronald showed
up,
John would have to fasten Emely to a
tree so that she couldn’t get away. He was not so stupid as to
leave her alone in the woods, knowing she would never wait there
for him. He had searched for another, less painful solution to this
problem, but so far had found none.

*

They walked
for approximately half an hour and Kitty was getting tired. Her red
tongue hung out and her tummy that had been filled not long ago was
now completely empty. John lifted her and carried her for a while.
The poor thing was so exhausted that she didn
’t resist at all and enjoyed looking at the world from a
higher perspective. It was now Emely who was hopping around, one
moment on John’s left and then right, unable to contain her
excitement. She kept reaching for Kitty, stroking her soft coat. In
doing this she once or twice came dangerously close to John. Every
time she touched him with a part of her body he felt a hot flush
all over, as if someone had poured warm water over him. He was
inhaling deeply, smelling her perfume, and reacting like a
teenager.

*

When they
parted later that evening to go to bed, his good mood turned into a
bad one, a kind of agony. He became nervous and restless,
everything bother
ing him. The room seemed
too small, the mattress too hard. He thought about going into town,
but changed his mind; he was sick of drinking and staying up late.
Often he had come home so drunk that the next day he couldn’t
remember his journey home. Besides, the thought of having sex with
other women was no longer appealing. He was angry with himself—now
that he could afford the most beautiful women in the world, he no
longer desired them. An attractive man in his early thirties with a
wallet full of money should have no problems with women. All he’d
have to do is to appear in one of the casinos and start showing off
and women would come to him without being asked. He had always
wanted a life like that, but now that he could have it all, he was
no longer interested. Instead, he wanted something he knew he
couldn’t have—Emely. Every time he closed his eyes, she appeared in
front of him. He dreamt of her body, of caressing it, and making
love all night long. For the first time in his life he didn’t want
just a naked body to empty himself into, but someone to hold. He
dreamt that she kissed him of her own accord. He wanted her to want
him.

*

John slept very badly that night and it was
not nightmares this time that stopped him from sleeping. He felt so
alone and the desire to approach her in whatever way grew with
every passing day. This desire was turning into a torture that he
found increasingly difficult to control.

*

Before
, he had been happy with
his life; he wasn’t doing brilliantly well, but neither did he have
reason to complain. He had never before suffered, never felt like
he did now, not wanting to go on living like this. At the same time
he didn’t want to go back to his old life. He was trapped. He saw
no way out and this increasingly bothered him.
Is this love?
he
thought bitterly.
Let her go
to hell.

*

“
Good
morning,” Emely
said to him, her voice
full of energy. “Kitty can barely wait to go out and relieve
herself.”

John dug his
fingers into his hair and smiled faintly. He put his hand in front
of his mouth and yawned discreetly. His eyes were red from lack of
sleep. “Then it’s best if I go now.”

“
Couldn’t I
come with you? I’d like to so much.”

John turned
toward her, intending to say no, but when he looked into her blue
eyes that pleaded so earnestly …. “Well,” he said, wrinkling his
forehead and thinking it out: they would definitely avoid Ronald if
they left through the back door. And coming back, they would be
able to see his car from far away.

Emely took advantage of his hesitation and
the expectant look in her eyes now surpassed even that in Kitty’s.
“Please, John, I’d like it so very much.”

“OK,” he said with a smile. He was simply
unable to resist her, but regretted it immediately and became angry
with himself for having become so soft lately.

Emely
joyfully picked up Kitty and kissed her on her black nose so that
the puppy started sneezing. “Let’s go then.”

*

Emely
carefully watched Kitty running around. Her eyes stopped on John
for a moment and she had to admire his broad shoulders. He was an
attractive man, she had to grant him that. In spite of
this
, the thought of him approaching her
in any way always made her shudder. Although he had greatly changed
recently and she was no longer as afraid of him, she preferred him
to keep some distance from her.

They walked
side by side for over an hour. Emely was intoxicated by the morning
beauty of the natural world around them and John was intoxicated by
her. She felt an incredible energy she had not known before. Her
former life had taken place mostly in various offices and she had
only rarely come into contact with the countryside. She inhaled
deeply of the moist air, as if wanting to fill herself with even
more energy. Now that she was out even less, she knew how to value
the beauty of the world outside and became aware of how mistaken
her former life had been. Her ceaseless desire for power and wealth
had blinded her so much that she often stayed at work late into the
night instead of spending time with someone she loved. Instead, she
could have walked unrestrained in the parks or the nearby woods, if
only she had taken the time. She had had to try so hard to succeed
in the world in which men still prevailed that she soon didn’t know
how to stop. Only now, when her freedom had been forcibly taken,
did she become truly aware of the mistakes she had made. It made
her feel vulnerable.

She had acted
wrongly when she greedily took over companies that ran into
short-term trouble. As soon as she
received information that a firm had liquidity problems,
she, without any remorse, had spread false rumors about it in two
or three banks, which in turn led the other banks to panic, too. It
was true that some of these companies would have gone bankrupt had
she not taken them over, but some would have perhaps saved
themselves and continued to do business successfully. What she had
been doing was not right and she was becoming increasingly aware of
this.
In fact, I have not
lived at all,
she thought.
I was just the propelling force in a
huge money factory that was growing bigger and bigger.

She had not
been involved in the buying and selling of shares directly for a
while, leaving it to the experts she had hired
and taught to work her way, and paid them well for it.
Those that were smart invested their money in shares, increasing
their earnings several fold.

Emely herself
had been involved in much more complicated business that concerned
the reorganization of the newly acquired companies, which was all
but simple. When she took over a pharmaceutical company, for
example, she had to find experts who instructed her in the
fundamentals of chemicals and other factors involved in the
production of medicinal drugs. She had to spend weeks doing
research, knowing that this was the only way of changing the manner
in which the company had functioned until then. Of course her
assistants, experts in both pharmacy and business, helped her, but
all the fundamental decisions still had to be taken by her. Later,
when the reorganization was completed, there followed a search for
new partners. Often she had to travel abroad to find companies that
would in the future serve as either suppliers or buyers. In the
case of suppliers, she was able to negotiate the lowest purchasing
prices, and in the case of buyers, large orders from the very
beginning. She was wildly successful, but it required a great deal
of time and energy.

Although she
loved Philip, she didn’t see him more than three times a week. She
didn’t want him to wait in bed for her every night since she was
often so exhausted that every minute of sleep mattered. When she
wanted his company, she called him two hours beforehand and he
waited for her like a puppy. It always took days before she finally
did call him, but he was unable to say no to her. Usually they met
at his place so that Emely could leave as soon as she got tired of
him. If they had met in her apartment, she would have had to endure
his company for as long as he wanted to stay. And he’d probably
never want to leave. As it was, she rushed to him in her sports car
as if it were a business meeting, quickly got her dose of love, and
left again for a few days. Philip protested and tried to keep her
with him for as long as possible. He often threatened to leave her,
as the relationship was giving him more pain than pleasure. Every
time he thought of this and decided to tell her so, his lips
suddenly froze and he gave in to her gentle kisses that soon
banished the idea from his head. He even took his cell phone with
him when he had a bath, always afraid that he might miss her
call.

*

One evening
when Emely had been crying because of being imprisoned far away
from those she loved, she wondered whom she was missing the most.
Was it Philip
, whom she used to see for a
maximum of six hours a week? Or perhaps Sally, her best friend? Or
the company to which she had dedicated most of her time? These
thoughts soon stopped her sobbing.

*

The following
day Emely said
, “I suggest you buy the
Prodny shares. It’s a company in Slovakia and during the
post-communist transition the stock exchange there was not so
well-regulated.”

John sat next
to Emely, with his legs spread wide.

She
said,
“The shares may grow by some tens
of thousands percent.”

John tried to
calculate the value of his capital if his current financial state
increased by
10,000 percent. His mouth
opened as if all the air were being sucked out of his
lungs.

Even before
he could comment, Emely
said, “On the
other hand, the value could fall or the company could go bankrupt.
In which case you’d lose everything.”

This part did
not interest him at all. The 10,000 percent was the only thing
reverberating around his head.

“
I propose
you invest 20 percent of your capital in Prodny.”

“
Thirty,”
John retorted.

“
No way, it’s
obvious you’re inexperienced. Let’s say twenty-five.”

“OK.”

They had to carry out the transaction through
a stockbroker who dealt with such deals.

Emely lucked
out. Everyone was buying these shares and their value increased by
over 500 percent within two weeks. John was so stressed out that he
smoked one cigarette after another so that Emely complained and he
had to go out of the room. He stood at the doorway, blowing the
smoke into the corridor and looking at the computer
screen.

“
When the
shares fall by over
20 percent within a
day, we sell them,” she told him.

She also
frequently had moments of great tension
,
since under normal circumstances she would never buy these shares.
The risk was simply too high.

Both Emely
and John woke up in the night, dreaming that Prodny had gone
bankrupt. One night John was shouting so loudly that Kitty began to
bark. After three weeks of tension, Emely decided to sell the
shares. Within two days their value had fallen for a total of 30
percent, which justified her decision. John immediately called the
stockbroker and told him what to do. As they had bought 19 percent
of all the Prodny shares, their value fell by another 8 percent in
one day as a result. John and Emely had caused a panic, so everyone
began selling and the value fell even more rapidly. In spite of all
this, Emely and John had increased the capital invested by 540
percent within three weeks and turned six hundred and twenty-five
thousand dollars into three million three hundred and seventy-five
thousand.

Emely was visibly relieved and John could not
believe his eyes when he saw the profit. He was so happy that he
lifted Emely high up into the air. She screamed and Kitty began to
bark.

“
We have to
celebrate this,” he said.

Emely was
pleased also, not having expected such a good result in her wildest
dreams. Even before the trading had finished they switched off the
computer, too excited to go on making small profits that day. They
decided to go for a short walk instead.

*

All three of
them were running to and fro. After half an hour the two humans
threw themselves
onto the grass, tired
out, and rested for a while in the warm sun. John could no longer
contain himself.

For weeks now
he
’d been dreaming of touching her one
day. The thought had grown into an obsession and true suffering. He
admired her so much that he could never describe the feelings he
had for her. She was the smartest, most beautiful and attractive
woman he had ever known. In fact he found her more beautiful every
day. Although lines were becoming noticeable on her face and he
knew she was nearly forty, in his opinion no twenty-year-old could
compete with her. She was simply perfect and he often had to look
down because he could no longer endure her beauty. It was too
painful. Knowing he couldn’t give her a hug or touch her in any
way, he sometimes felt such a strong pain in his heart that he
thought it would stop beating.