Only the Strongest Survive (27 page)

“
But you’re
alright as you are, aren’t you? Sitting there, shuffling papers.
Occasionally you answer the phone in a friendly way. I, on the
other hand, am on my feet all day long. Look how swollen they are.”
She pointed at her ankles.

“
I know you
don’t have it easy in that restaurant. But you won’t be a waitress
forever. Sooner or later you’ll inherit quite a bit from your old
man.”

“Oh, please, don’t mention him. We’ve agreed
you wouldn’t mention that.”

“OK, OK. All I wanted to say is that I want
more.”

Sally lit a
cigarette and inhaled deeply. “If you’re persistent, you’re bound
to succeed,” she said, blowing the smoke out.

“You see, nearly all stockbrokers have a
degree in economics. They’re all so smart.”

“So you want to be a stockbroker?”

“Yes, and I will be.”

“Wonderful, at least one of us will know what
to do with money. Now please get dressed, my tummy is
growling.”

“Yup.”

Emely smiled. She loved Sally, her simplicity
and directness. She would never swap her for another friend.

*

“
Emely, why
don’t you get yourself a guy?”
Sally
asked her in the car.

“What do you mean?”

“
You know
very well what I mean. You’re nearly twenty and you’re still
waiting for a prince on a white horse.”

“I’m not waiting for anyone. You know I
haven’t the time.”

“
Oh, come on.
What use is being a virgin at your age? I don’t know who you’re
saving yourself for.”

Emely looked
out the window, not liking the direction the conversation was
heading. “I’m not saving it for anyone,” she said. “You know I’d go
out with a guy if the right one came along.”

“Then I can introduce you to Michael.”

“Listen, Sally, I can find a guy myself if I
want to, but I simply don’t have the time for such trivial
matters.”

“So how come you haven’t managed to find one
yet? Can you tell me that?”

“There hasn’t been anyone right for me.”

“Oh, come on. I’ll introduce you to Michael
tomorrow.”

Emely was
getting angry at her friend
, yet
thought,
But what if she’s
right? What if I remain a cold old spinster?
That was not what she wanted.
Maybe I should give Michael a try.
She said, “What’s he like?”

“Michael is a wonderful guy. You’ll like
him.”

Emely didn’t
reply, but the next day regretted that she hadn’t resisted more. As
soon as she came home from work, she saw a tall guy, whose ears
stuck out slightly, sitting next to Sally.

“
This is
Michael,” Sally said with a smile. “Where have you been? It’s half
past eight. When I called you in the afternoon you promised to be
home by seven at the latest.”

“
I had some
papers to organize,” Emely lied.

What she had
really been doing was listening to a conversation her boss had with
one of the business partners. She deliberately
didn
’t close the door completely after
taking in their coffee so that she could hear them.

She sat down, looking tired. “Nice to meet
you, Michael, I’m Emely,” she said as they shook hands.

Sally watched them with satisfaction.

“
I know
everything about you. Sally told me.”

Emely looked at her angrily.

“
I’d love to
stay, but I have a date with John,” Sally said.

“What, you’re leaving?” Emely said, looking
frightened.

And the next minute, her friend was gone. To
make matters worse, Michael was only a couple of feet away from
her. Her cheeks went red and her head pounded.

“
Where is she
going so fast?” she said, not able to think of anything else to
say. She was still looking at the door.

Michael
noticed her embarrassment and smiled as he said
, “Sally told me you had a job.”

“Yes,” she said quickly.

“And that you work hard.”

“Yes.”

“She said she was your only company.”

She gave him a strange look.

“What I meant was that you don’t have a
boyfriend.”

“
No.” She was
as rigid as a rock and didn’t know how to behave. She wanted to say
something, but didn’t know what. And what she wanted most was to be
left alone.

Discouraged
at
her answering yes or no only, Michael
asked, “What about movies? Would you like to go
sometime?”

“I don’t know.”

He thought
that at least the answer was different. He moved closer to her.
Emely moved too, but away from him.

She looked at
him for a moment. He was not a bad guy, but there was something
about him she didn’t like. She couldn’t explain what.

“Don’t you want to know anything about me?
Aren’t you going to ask me any questions?”

She looked down and her cheeks went even
redder. She was angry at herself for allowing him to derail her so
much and make her act like she was fourteen.

“I work in a printing house. I’m the boss,”
he said proudly.

“Aha.”

That was all
he could take, seeing there was no point in wasting his time with
her. He decided on a direct attack.

He stroked her hair with his right hand and
leaned toward her. Even before she was able to get up, he had stuck
his long tongue into her mouth so quickly that she had no time to
defend herself.

She felt terrible and pushed with her hands
against his chest while his tongue wriggled around her mouth.

“How disgusting,” she said. Within a second,
she was free. “Go, Michael, leave this very minute.”

He smiled as
he said, “Finally, you start talking.”

“Out! And don’t ever show up here again.”

“Oh well, you’ll cool down soon. Even though
you couldn’t be any colder than you already are.”

These words
got to her. She cried for a long time afterward, feeling furious
with Sally.

*

“
I didn’t
know he would attack so soon,” Sally
said, defending herself when she came home. “He was very
gentle with me.”

“
So you’ve
already been with him? How dare you—”

“
It was
nothing. He’s not a bad guy, if only you’d give him a
chance.”

“I don’t want to see him ever again.”

“OK, OK.”

*

Two weeks later Greg appeared. Emely came
home late on Friday night, tired as usual. All she wanted was a
quiet evening, followed by a long sleep. As she was climbing the
endless stairs to the apartment, she heard loud laughter.

“
Let me
introduce Greg,” Sally said as soon as Emely walked in. “He’s a
good friend of mine.”

Emely
thought
,
Another ex?
Or her
latest boyfriend?

“Come and sit with us!” Greg ordered her as
if this was his home.

“Greg has been telling me about his
adventures in Australia. He travels all the time, you see.”

“
Mmm, very
interesting
.” Emely softened a
bit.
Maybe it’s not a trap
after all.

She sat down
and joined the conversation. After a few minutes she became
relaxed. Greg was good company and funny. All three laughed a lot
as he told the girls about his travels. Sally soon got up and
returned with three beers
and tall
glasses.

“No, thanks,” Emely said.

“
Oh, come
on,” Sally said. “You’ve been working all day long. You need to let
go a little. It’ll only do you good.”

“No, I really don’t want one.”

Even before she finished speaking, thick foam
appeared in her glass.

“
You won’t
get drunk from one glass of beer,” her friend insisted.

“Oh, alright then.”

They got
along really well. Emely had not laughed so much in a long time. At
one point she realized she was watching Greg. He was medium height
and slim, and she had to admit she liked him even though he had a
big nose and his hair stuck up strangely. Maybe it was his
chattiness that attracted her. He never ran out of things to say
and always had a secret reserve of jokes.

The first glass of beer was followed by a
second and a third. Emely was getting more and more relaxed. When
she went to the bathroom, she staggered a little. “Ooops,” she
said, laughing at herself.

When she came back, Sally was gone.

“Where is she?” Emely asked.

“
She said she
had a date with Bill,” Greg
said.

“
Bill? Does
she have yet another boyfriend?” Then she started laughing, not
caring. She felt wonderful and that was all that mattered. She
could have more fun with Greg. He’d tell her jokes and stories and
she’d laugh some more.

She looked at him and felt strange sensations
in her body. He was so attractive. Then she became aware of her
sinful thoughts and chased them away.

“So you got lost in China, you said?”

“Yes, I asked people if they could help, but
no one spoke English.”

Emely sat
next to him, contrary to her intention of sitting opposite. A
strange force made her get close to him, but she regretted it
immediately. “And what did you do then?”

“
I gave quite
a bit of money to a boy who could suddenly understand everything
and he took me where I wanted to be, on his bicycle.”

“
How funny.”
She didn’t know when exactly she fell into his arms and didn’t
care. She felt free and relaxed. “I wonder where Sally is,” she
said, giggling.

“
What do we
need her for?” Greg said.

T
he next thing she knew his
tongue was in her mouth. She wanted to resist, but remembered
Michael saying she was cold and so she remained perfectly still,
letting him do what he wanted. Her head was spinning and everything
seemed only half real. In fact, there were moments when she even
liked what was happening. When he lifted her and carried her to her
bed, she knew what would follow, but again she didn’t mind.
Screw virginity, screw
everything,
she thought.

Greg was a
gentle lover. For over an hour he caressed and kissed her body
before he finally took her. She could barely wait for this to
happen. It was dark and she could see very little. She felt
his strong, firm body pressing on hers. His
kisses no longer bothered her either and she gave in to this play
of passion, thinking it was about time she became familiar with
it.

*

In the morning, she had a headache. Luckily,
Greg was no longer there.

“
Why did you
foist Greg on me?” she asked Sally as they were having their
morning coffee.

“
I didn’t
foist anyone on you. Why don’t you tell me how it went,
instead?”

Emely tried
to remember the details of the night before, but however hard she
tried, nothing much came up. She could describe every minute
leading up to the moment she started drinking, but afterward it
seemed as if everything had happened within a few minutes. She did
remember the pleasant heat that filled her head as soon as she took
the first sip and then … complete amnesia.

She scratched
the top of her forehead and could feel his teeth nibbling the
inside of her thigh.
How dare
he go down there? How could he do something like that? And I let
him. Terrible. How could I? It must never happen again.
She felt disgusted with herself.

“Sally, don’t bring me any more guys. I’ll
find one myself if I want one.”

“Oh, come on, don’t be so angry. All I wanted
was to liven up your boring routine.”

“
My routine
is not boring. If nothing else, I want to do something with my
life. Unlike you, who spends your days lying on the terrace and
changing partners like underwear.”

“
Enough,
Emely!” Sally’s face showed shock and anger. She drank her coffee,
left the table, and within seconds she was gone from the
apartment.

Let her go, I don’t care if I never see her again.
Angry tears poured when she remembered the hands
that had kneaded her body. His hot lips stuck to hers and pulled at
her tongue as if wanting to remove it. She could barely breathe.
Her breasts had become firmer, her skin responding to the smallest
touch, her body betraying her in every possible way.
Damn Sally, how could she do this to
me? My only friend.

Most of all,
she was angry with herself for returning his passionate kisses.
Emely recalled stroking his hair with her left hand and his back
with her right. It made her tremble with disgust.
How could I do things like that? I’ll
never forgive myself.

When she had
looked at his erect penis, she could not help laughing. She even
touched it for a moment and started giggling. Now the memory made
her cry. She was disgusted with herself and what she had
done
; it seemed dirty and vile. She made
a firm decision not to do it ever again.

Her strict convent upbringing had obviously
achieved its goal.

*

It took five
days for them to make up. Five days of avoidance and angry
outbursts. Emely never thought the presence of her friend could
bother her so much. What she really wanted was to tell her to move
out.
How could she have
betrayed me so?