“Hmm…true. There had never been rumors about a relationship while I was a Horseman.” He lifted his shoulder in a half shrug. “Not that I would’ve paid any attention to them at the time.”
“I think Gatian would’ve been the only one privy to such information, and I’m not sure he would’ve thought sharing it was important,” Baqir commented.
Kibwe agreed. While he’d been the Pale Horseman, Gatian, hadn’t been forthcoming with most of the knowledge he’d gained over the centuries. Hell, the man was the same way now that they were mortal again. Tugging on the end of one of his braids, Kibwe grimaced.
Aldo folded the paper then set it aside. “Gatian said he’d dealt with Daystar while helping Pierre get better. He believes the only reason why the fallen helped him was because Lam asked Daystar to do so. That speaks of a deeper relationship than just being friends.”
Lam leaned against the wall just on the other side of the living room door, listening as the others discussed him and Daystar. He smiled at Aldo’s last sentence. Yes, he and Daystar had been more than just friends. He hadn’t heeded all the warnings, he’d just gone on, positive that either no one would pay attention to them—or that love would win out in the end.
His painful back laid bare the truth of his delusions. There was no forgiveness for an angel who committed the ultimate sin—loving the most notorious fallen in all the realms. Lam rested his forehead on the wood and sighed. Would he have done things differently if he’d known what the outcome would be? No. He’d loved Day long before he’d led the war against the Quad. Lam couldn’t shut off those emotions, no matter what Day had done. Even if it would have been wiser to turn his back on his lover the moment he’d been sent down to the hellish realm.
“What are you doing out here?” Gatian spoke from behind him.
Straightening, Lam turned slowly to meet Gatian’s disgruntled gaze. “I’m tired of lying in bed or sitting in my room. I need something new to look at.”
Gatian shook his head. “You should’ve called for one of us to help you.”
“My legs aren’t broken,” Lam muttered, arms crossed over his chest as he pouted, knowing he looked silly but not caring.
“I know that, but your body is still healing and you need to take it easy for a while.” Gatian shoved the door all the way open before encircling Lam’s waist. “Lean on me and we’ll get you to the couch. Then you can talk to these idiots all you want.”
“You’re not the one in charge anymore, Gatian. Maybe you should tone down the attitude,” Aldo suggested as he strolled across the room to help Gatian with Lam.
Gatian rolled his eyes but didn’t reply. Once Lam had sat and taken a deep breath, he could admit that Gatian was right. He should’ve asked for someone to help him down the stairs. He leaned his head back on the cushions then sighed.
Darn! I hate being weak. I hate having to rely on someone else to help me.
He didn’t protest when Aldo checked his bandages. Once that was all done, he glanced around the room. “Did you send all of your husbands home?”
Kibwe nodded. “Ekundayo went back to the Congo and Russ to Mongolia.”
“Bart went to the country with Pierre and the children,” Aldo told him. “We thought it would be best for them to keep each other company. Besides, Gatian has world-class security, so I’m confident they’ll be okay.”
“Mortal security means nothing to an angel,” Lam reminded them.
Gatian snorted. “True.”
Lam shrugged. “The archangels got what they wanted, which was to discredit and punish me for believing Day might not be as bad as they said he was.”
Baqir eyed him. “How could he not be? Are you telling us the legends of his fall are lies?”
Shoving his hand through his hair, Lam tugged on the ends for a second. “No. He did lead a rebellion in the heavenly realm. He thought the Quad had too much power and were using it for their own purposes, not for the good of mortals.”
The four men stared at Lam and he could see their skepticism shining in their eyes.
“I wasn’t there,” he admitted. “I had been sent down here to deal with some mortals who were causing problems. By the time I returned, Day had been tried and convicted. The Judge banished him from the heavenly realm, but for some reason, chose not to strip him of his power. He didn’t do it because he was jealous of humans.”
“Who told you that?” Gatian narrowed his gaze as he stared at him. “Daystar? Did he claim that it was all done in the best interest of the very people he looks down on?”
Lam gritted his teeth. As much as he wanted to deny what Gatian had said, he couldn’t. Day did think he was superior to mortals.
And why shouldn’t he? He is far more powerful than any human in this realm. Hell, aside from the Quad, he’s pretty much the most powerful being in all of the realms.
Sighing, Lam dropped his head and stared at the floor.
“He did tell me that,” he said then continued before any of them could say something. “But I’ve also heard it from others who rebelled with him. You can try to convince me all you want that Day did all of it for self-serving reasons. I won’t deny he’s arrogant and self-centered. He’s far more interested in his own little part of the world than he’d ever be in anyone else. I know all that.”
“But you love him,” Aldo said softly.
Lam kept studying the pattern of the carpet under his feet. “I won’t deny that, since it’s loving him that got me in trouble.” He raised his head to meet each man’s gaze. “Daystar is an asshole. I know that.”
Gatian snorted, but didn’t actually say anything.
“I’m not an idiot and I haven’t stuck my head in the sand about Day. He’s arrogant and narcissistic, more concerned with himself than anyone else. Trust me. He doesn’t care about mortals—or angels, for that matter. All he cares about is his own comfort.”
“How did you happen to meet up with him? Were you close before he was banished?” Aldo’s face stayed blank, as though he didn’t want to show his thoughts.
“Do you want to know how we met?” Lam sighed, rubbing his hands over the pants he wore.
Baqir pursed his lips before nodding. “Yeah. I guess we do want to know that. I’m fascinated by the whole idea of Daystar falling in love with anyone besides himself.”
Lam glanced around then said, “You’ll want to see about getting food and drinks, Gatian. This might take a while.”
He organized his thoughts while Gatian did as he suggested. By the time the food and libations arrived, Lam was ready to recount how he and Daystar came to be lovers.
Maybe I should be more private about this, but I’m not ashamed of what Day and I were doing. I knew no one would understand why I fell in love with him.
When they were settled in their chairs, Kibwe motioned to him. “Why don’t you tell us your love story, Lam? Since you were privy to all of ours.”
Grinning, Lam accepted the glass of water Aldo handed him. “Yes, I was, and you have to say I did a good job making sure you all got together.”
“You did?” Gatian sounded incredulous. “I’m pretty sure you had nothing to do with us falling in love.”
Lam shifted. “I made sure you were able to help Pierre while he was detoxing. I watched over your husbands while you needed to do things.” He nodded at Kibwe and Aldo. “And I made sure Gatian sent you, Baqir, to sow the seeds of war where you could find Russell.”
The surprise on all their faces made him chuckle again. He’d enjoyed playing Cupid for all of them. Being in love himself, he wanted the Horsemen to find something that would bring happiness to their lives again. They would all live normal lives full of love and joy because he’d ignored the rules and found them the right men to bond with.
“Patting yourself on the back, huh? That’s not like you at all, love.”
He could almost hear Day teasing him.
“You thought it was just a coincidence that you met those men,” he commented. “Trust me, it was actually quite hard for me. I’d been looking for at least a century for each of you.”
Kibwe rolled his eyes. “I’m not going to complain about it. Thanks for all your hard work, but I’m more interested in your relationship with Day.”
“Why? What is so intriguing about Day and me?” Lam shook his head. “I mean, we’re nothing special.”
“Nothing special? A messenger angel and the most reviled fallen angel of all time?” Baqir raised an eyebrow at him. “Seriously? You don’t see why we’d been wondering how it all came about? I never would’ve thought Daystar capable of caring about anyone besides himself.”
Lam grimaced. “You all keep saying that as though I don’t know what he’s like. I had talked to him a few times before he got tossed out of the heavenly realm and I had heard all about him. He was like the fucking rock star of our world.”
Gatian grunted and Lam took it as a sign to continue talking. The others seemed to be really invested in what he had to say.
“Maybe you could explain what heaven is. From everything you’ve said so far, I’m getting the impression heaven isn’t quite what we think it is.” Aldo studied Lam for a minute then dropped his gaze to his plate.
“What you’re raised to believe is close to what heaven is, though the being you call God, we call the Judge. The Judge is completely impartial. He doesn’t care about emotions. He’s concerned about the right or wrong of an issue.”
“What about Jesus? Are you saying he’s not the Son of God? That he’s not the religious icon a lot believe he is?” Aldo sounded upset.
Lam wrinkled his nose as he thought about what he could say. He had a feeling that Aldo was Catholic and he didn’t want to destroy the man’s faith in what he’d been taught. “I’m not saying that. It’s hard to explain who he was and how much the legends surrounding him hold the truth about him, but you have to dig through them to find it. The heavenly realm isn’t quite what you’ve been led to believe.”
Gatian held up his hand and stopped the others from asking anything else. “I don’t really care about what we’ve have and haven’t been told. Just get on with the story, Lam. To be honest, I’m not interested in heaven. I’ve lived in limbo for more centuries than I want to think about. Continuing to exist in someplace, even somewhere as perfect as heaven is supposed to be, holds no thrill.”
“Even if you get to spend all that time with Pierre in paradise?” Lam couldn’t help but ask.
Shaking his head, Gatian said, “I get to spend time with him here. What do I care about heaven? As far as I’m concerned, I live in paradise right now.”
Lam couldn’t argue with that statement. So he set his plate and glass down then cleared his throat. “I met Daystar accidentally in Machu Picchu long ago.”
“Machu Picchu? But the Incans didn’t believe in the Christian God, right?” Baqir frowned.
Lam chuckled. “My existence is not dependent on whether people believe in me. I have a job to do.”
“Which is what? If you aren’t really delivering messages from God, then what are you doing?” Aldo sounded disgruntled, as though Lam was destroying all of his beliefs.
“If you want to call him God, you can. I deliver warnings from the Judge to people who risk being sent to the hellish realm as punishment.” Lam paused for a second then continued, “I used to deliver them. I won’t be doing that anymore.”
Kibwe touched his knee. “Don’t worry. We’ll find something for you to do now that you’re mortal. Who will deal with the Horsemen now?”
Lam shrugged. “Don’t know. And right now I don’t care. They are no longer my concern.”
“Once more we’ve strayed off topic,” Gatian pointed out. “I have no interest in those who took our place. Let’s get back to Peru.”
Lam wasn’t surprised that Gatian would keep them on task. He nodded. “Of course.”
Chapter Six
Machu Picchu, centuries earlier
“Well, what do we have here? I do believe a little messenger has gone astray.”
Lam shot to his feet when he heard the sarcastic drawl coming from behind him. His eyes widened and his heart missed a beat—which he had never thought possible before. He turned around slowly, worried about who he might see. The speaker was tall and otherworldly beautiful with pitch-black hair and dark eyes.
“You can see me?” He was shocked. It was rare for anyone, aside from the person his message was intended for, to see him. Studying the man, Lam could tell he wasn’t mortal and while there were faint hints of power, Lam sensed he wasn’t a true angel.
“Of course I can see you. What kind of message could the Judge possibly have for these miserable creatures?” He waved his hand to encompass the mortals gathered at the base of the temple.
“Who are you?” Lam ignored the man’s question. He didn’t have to explain himself to anyone. Especially to some arrogant jerk. He’s quite handsome, Lam’s inner voice chirped.
Lam gave himself a mental head slap. An angel didn’t notice things like that. His only purpose was delivering messages and dealing with the Four Horsemen. The thought of them reminded him why he was there.
“Never mind. I don’t have time for this.” He swung around, reaching out with his power, trying to find the recipient of his warning.
“Ah, but you’re in my world now. You will deal with me, if it’s what I want.” The stranger chuckled. “And I want.”
In the blink of Lam’s eyes, the jungle disappeared and he was standing on a desolate shoreline leading up to a full growth forest. Water crashed against the rocks in a deafening concert of power and anger. He whirled to face the man, a little fear dancing in his chest.
“Where the hell are we? Who are you that you dare to interfere with an Agnus Dei?” he demanded.
He’d never thought an eyebrow could convey so much arrogance, but this man’s did as he raised it in a rather sardonic arch.
“I dare because, like I said, you are in my world. As to where we are”—he gestured to the trees behind him—“we’re at my home.”
Before Lam said anything else, a magnificent cabin appeared as the illusions of a forest dissolved. He gasped and an uneasy feeling started to creep into him.
“Your world,” he repeated.
“Oh I am sorry. I have been remiss in introducing myself. Lucifer Daystar, at your service.” Daystar swept him a deep bow. “It’s an honor to entertain an angel. I haven’t spent much time with your kind lately.”