Pleasing the Pirate: A Loveswept Historical Romance (18 page)

She stopped short when she spied Mairi.

“Good morning,” Mairi said, smiling down on the little girl.

The frazzled nursemaid hurried in. “Oh, miss, I apologize. We didn’t know anyone was in here and she got away from me. Again.” She shot Annabelle a stern look.

“That’s quite all right. Please don’t leave on my account. I confess I’m a wee bit lonely right now.”

The nursemaid, Carrie, looked unconvinced and a little worried. “Well, if you’re certain.”

“Absolutely.” She sat on the nearest chair. “And what were your plans today?” she asked Annabelle.

“We were going to look at some picture books,” Carrie said.

Mairi clapped her hands together. “Splendid. May I join you?”

For a moment Carrie looked alarmed, then nodded reluctantly. “Of course, miss.”

It took reading a few books before Annabelle was comfortable enough with Mairi to climb in her lap with a book in her hand. She wasn’t satisfied until Mairi opened the book and read it to her.

Mairi snuggled the small body close. Annabelle rested against her and looked at the pictures as Mairi read. Mairi drew the moment out, using different voices for different characters, not wanting the afternoon to end. She snuggled Annabelle closer, noting how perfectly the little girl fit into the crook of her arm.

The story of Annabelle’s conception had stayed with Mairi through the long night and into the morning. She couldn’t stop thinking of Susan’s battered body hidden in the grass. Of the long road to recovery she had to endure while pregnant with her attacker’s baby and the seclusion she faced then and now. And there she went, getting involved in this family when she shouldn’t be. She had her own family she needed to worry about and hold together. What happened to Susan was horrid but no less horrible than what happened to Aileen and many other women in Scotland. She looked down on little Annabelle’s blond head. The child was slumped against her, heavy, breathing deep. Fast asleep.

For a long time now she’d felt a hollowness in her that she’d ignored because she’d been focused on finding Grant. She’d pinned everything on her brother. The success of her clan, saving their land and the people who counted on them.

But what if Grant didn’t return with her?

What if her voyage to England was for naught?

MacGowan made no secret that he wanted an heir. That would be the only good thing to come of a marriage to him—a child of her own to love and cherish. But she wanted more than that. She wanted what her parents had. Love. Mutual respect. Laughter.

“I’ll take her,” the nursemaid whispered.

Mairi shook her head, shocked to discover tears in her eyes. She’d had such dreams growing up. Of marriage, children, happiness. None of her dreams ever included losing her beloved home and her cherished family. She hoped and prayed that Annabelle’s dreams, whatever they might be, would come true. That she wouldn’t live through heartache so fierce that she feared it would tear her apart. That she’d love until she was old and gray and wrinkled. That she would be happy.

Susan walked in and stopped short when she saw Mairi with Annabelle.

“I see you’ve met Annabelle,” she said.

“I have.” Mairi lightly ran her hand down Annabelle’s curls, feeling protective of the little girl. Phin claimed her as his own, but who claimed her heart? Who did she run to when she skinned her knee? When she had bad dreams in the middle of the night?

Susan looked at the child, her expression soft and wistful as she settled into a chair.

“She must be getting heavy,” she said.

“She’s fine.”

Susan tore her gaze away. “She looks like Phin,” she said.

There was some resemblance, but she looked much more like Susan. What did Susan see when she looked at her daughter? Was Annabelle a constant reminder of what happened to her? “Would you mind if I held her?” Susan asked.

A small sound of distress came from the direction of the nursemaid but Susan would not have heard it.

Mairi hesitated, but when Susan looked at her with such hope, Mairi couldn’t tell her no. Annabelle wasn’t hers to begin with, and Susan was already holding out her arms to the little girl.

Mairi gently transferred her to her mother’s arms and watched as Susan settled back, staring intently into her sleeping daughter’s face.

The nursemaid silently left the room.

Susan gently brushed Annabelle’s hair away from her cheek and smiled a sad smile, her face softening in a way Mairi had not seen before. In a way that a mother would look at her child.

Had anyone even asked Susan if she wanted to give up her right to be this child’s mother? Had they discussed their plans with her when they decided that Phin would claim Annabelle as his own?

The entire story was tragic, the suffering of those involved running deeper than Mairi probably even knew.

Mairi touched Susan’s arm, causing Susan to look at her. “You love her,” she said in wonder.

“You know, then.”

“Phin told me. I hope you don’t mind.”

“I’m surprised he said anything.”

“I think he knew he could trust me. I hope you feel the same.”

Susan smiled. “I like you and I think you’re good for Phin.”

“Oh, no.” Mairi laughed softly, uneasy. “Phin and I have an agreement. Once he helps me find my brother he’ll be well rid of me and glad of it, I’m sure.”

“I think you’re wrong. I think Phin will be sad when you’re gone.”

“Trust me, he’ll be happy when he doesn’t have to worry about me anymore.”

“Phin worries no matter what.” Susan’s smile faded as she looked down on Annabelle. “He thought it was best that no one knew Annabelle was mine. I was hardly in a position to make any sort of decision.”

Mairi had no doubt there were deaf women who’d given birth before and went on to raise happy well-adjusted children.

Susan glanced up at Mairi, tears in her eyes. “This is enough for me.”

Was it? Mairi doubted it, but what could she say? That Phin made the wrong decision? That Annabelle needed a mother to love her? This wasn’t her family and she had to remind herself that this wasn’t her problem.

“Excuse me, m’lady.”

Torn from her musings, Mairi looked up to find Rebecca in the doorway holding a piece of paper. “I found this.”

“Thank you, Rebecca.” Mairi took the folded note, opened it and read it. Her hands started to shake and she quickly refolded it and stuffed it in the pocket of her skirt.

“Wh-where did you find this, Rebecca?”

“In your bedchamber. When I went upstairs it was sitting there. I thought it looked important.”

Susan was watching the exchange with a furrowed brow. Hopefully she hadn’t caught much of the conversation.

“Thank you, Rebecca. I had wondered where I dropped this.”

Mairi stared out the window and fingered the folded note that Rebecca had brought her earlier that day. The moon had risen long ago, but the light was muted by the clouds and the smoke choking the sky.

The garden at midnight
.

That was all the note said but that was all it needed to say. She had no doubt Grant had written it. They had studied their letters together. She would know the spiked handwriting anywhere.

She rubbed her cold arms, shivering in the chill of the night. Had he returned for her? Or was he here to discover what information she’d unearthed?

There was no use speculating when all she had to do was walk downstairs and out into the garden to find out.

Shoving the paper in her pocket she eased open the door and peered into the hallway. No one was about. The house had quieted hours ago. She tiptoed down the steps and pulled up short when she saw a different man sitting by the door where Ezra normally sat.

So even at night the door was guarded?

He looked up at her and she recognized him as one of the sailors from the
Wanderer
.

“Can I help you, m’lady?”

“I …” She licked her lips. “I was thirsty and hungry. I thought I’d get a bite to eat in the kitchen.”

He nodded, crossed his arms and leaned his head back, closing his eyes, apparently satisfied that she would get something to eat and not be foolish enough to slip out the door while he was sitting there.

She made her way to the kitchen, her mouth dry, her heart pounding. She should be happy and relieved that Grant had come for her, but all she could think about were the people in this house. Phin, Susan, Annabelle. Despite her warnings to herself she had become enmeshed in their lives and she wanted one chance to say goodbye to them.

With her hand on the knob of the door that led to the gardens, she looked up at the
ceiling, picturing the floors above and the people she’d come to care for asleep up there.

This is not your life, Mairi. Yours is in Scotland and that’s what you must concentrate on now
.

She turned the knob and stepped out into the cool night. Despite the temperature she felt flushed.

At night the gardens were dark, so dark she couldn’t see past the terrace. She should have brought a candle, but she’d not thought that far ahead, and besides, a candle would have brought attention.

She stepped off the terrace and searched the darkness but there was nothing to see. Carefully she made her way forward, trying to remember where the paths were. A sound to her right had her spinning in that direction.

“Grant?” she whispered.

* * *

When Mairi turned toward him Phin hastily slid farther into the shadows.

Her gaze swept across him, probing into the darkness.

“Grant?”

Per his instructions, Rebecca had first taken the note she’d found in Mairi’s room to him. He’d been almost positive it’d been written by Grant but hadn’t been sure until now, when Mairi whispered her brother’s name.

He’d told Rebecca to take the note to Mairi without informing her that he’d read it first. He’d pulled the night watchman off the back door earlier. And then he’d waited.

His men still patrolled the grounds as they’d done since his return home, but he’d lessened the patrols. By now Grant would know of the guards and would become suspicious if they were entirely eliminated.

Now he just had to hide in the shadows until Grant showed himself then nab the bastard and take him to the king.

Then Phin would have his life back.

He made himself stand still, breathe slowly.

Mairi shivered and looked around. The weak moonlight highlighted bits of gold in her
hair. Her curls were loose and hanging down her back, her throat pale in the darkness.

What did Grant want with Mairi? Was he here to take her away or for something else? The thought of Mairi no longer in his protection made him feel oddly hollow. Throughout the day he found himself listening for her footfalls, or while passing the library doorway, searching to see her curled up on a chair reading a book.

He’d even heard her reading to Annabelle. He still wasn’t completely comfortable with the thought of his very private life colliding with this very dangerous mission, but what had he expected when he brought her here?

Nevertheless the thought of not seeing her in his library was disquieting.

Mairi turned in a circle. He could practically feel the tension radiating off her. She’d not brought a shawl and she was rubbing her arms as she looked about.

“Grant?” she whispered again. “Are you here?”

Phin searched the area behind her, looking for any movement but saw nothing. His men were nearby, making themselves as silent as he. All Grant had to do was walk into the trap.

Phin’s hand itched to grab his pistol, but he forced himself to remain unmoving.

Mairi walked a few paces away, stopped, looked around, then walked a few paces in the other direction. It was obvious to Phin that she didn’t want to venture farther into the gardens, where it was so dark and so far from the safety of the house. Did she distrust her brother so much?

After a few more minutes of pacing Mairi made a frustrated sound and moved toward the house. Phin was beginning to believe she’d given up on her brother when she stopped and looked around again.

“Where are you, Grant?” she whispered into the trees.

Phin wondered the same. Had he seen the patrols? Had someone or something scared him off?

A quarter of an hour had already passed and he was beginning to lose hope. It seemed Mairi had as well. The foolish lass had not brought proper outerwear and was visibly shivering now.

Arthur, one of Phin’s trusted men, sidled up next to Phin and shook his head, indicating the patrols found no one lurking about.

Phin nodded and focused again on Mairi. She was looking about, her shoulders bowed in
defeat. With one last look she turned and went back inside. Phin continued to stand in the shadows in the vain hope that Grant would show himself. But another half hour later he still hadn’t arrived.

With a hand motion to Arthur to keep patrolling Phin slipped out of the shadows and followed Mairi’s path back into the house.

Something had spooked Grant and once again Phin had lost his chance to capture the man. Disappointment tasted bitter in his mouth as he made his way to his bedchamber.

* * *

Phin spent most of the next day in his office with his solicitor making sure that Susan, Annabelle, Mr. and Mrs. Horton and the rest of the servants were taken care of in his absence. He’d been lucky in that Mr. and Mrs. Horton had agreed to stay on after his parents’ death and help take care of Susan and Annabelle. They were indispensible and he considered them more a part of the family than servants. Therefore he made certain that they were well taken care of in the event of his death.

The entire business was daunting and depressing and it’d taken far longer than he’d anticipated. Yet while his solicitor was laying Phin’s life on the table and talking about his extensive holdings and the many places he had money stashed, all Phin could think about was Mairi.

The image of her standing in his moonlit garden last night stayed with him. She’d seemed so small, so vulnerable and so lonely. As Susan was to him, Grant was Mairi’s only living relative and he could understand her need to see her brother. He also understood her possible excitement that Grant was visiting her—albeit clandestinely—and her acute disappointment when he didn’t show.