Authors: Gwyneth Bolton
Torn didn’t even begin to cover how she felt at that moment. “I need to get out of here.”
Oops, did I say that out loud?
“Why do you have to get out of here? I’m on my best behavior.” His hand slowly caressed her neck and move up to her cheek.
A moan escaped her lips before she could stop it. Letting Mr. Good Behavior in hadn’t been her brightest idea. But she couldn’t very well make him leave now. Could she?
He turned her face to his and captured her lips in another one of his mind-altering kisses.
As she let her tongue glide into his mouth and tasted the addictive nature of his masculinity, she couldn’t think of one reason she should stop, not one reason she shouldn’t kiss him until all of their clothing fell off. Sure, she might think otherwise if she halted their lip and tongue exploration, but why on earth would she do that?
His hand dipped under her T-shirt and cupped her breast. She found herself leaning back on the sofa to give him better access, and was rewarded when he began to rub her nipples.
“Mmmmm…Jason…”
He nibbled on her lips in a seductive manner, taking a small nip before responding, “Yes, Penny?”
She closed her eyes and tried to catch her breath. “What are we doing?”
His left eye slanted. “Rhetorical question?”
She let her hands roam his chest, lingering over the ripples of muscles underneath his dress shirt. She moved to his tie. It hardly seemed fair that he still had to wear his church clothes, when she’d had the chance to change into something more comfortable. The least she could do was loosen his tie, and maybe the first two buttons on his shirt.
His eyes followed her hands, watching as she tossed his tie to the side and arching when she stopped at the second button.
She let her hands rest on his shoulders. “We’ve got so much history between us, Jason.”
“Which we agreed to leave in the past for now.” His hands moved from underneath her T-shirt to his own shirt. He finished the job she’d started, and removed his shirt.
“But—”
“Look, Penny, all I know is right here, right now, I feel like I need to connect with you. I want you so badly. And I feel like no matter what happened in the past, you want me, too. Am I right?”
“Yes.” She didn’t even hesitate, didn’t give herself a moment to think about her answer.
Jason let out a sigh of relief. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t still determined to find out what really happened to their relationship back then. But he’d also be lying if he didn’t admit he still wanted Penny. He still craved her touch. He still desired her beyond belief.
He leaned forward and gave her a small peck on the lips before removing her T-shirt. The pink lacy bra underneath was one of those numbers that showed lots of cleavage. It looked hot, but he knew what would be even hotter. He reached behind her and unfastened the bra.
He had to take a moment to pause and appreciate all her beauty. She had more curves than when they were seventeen. And yet her thirty-three-year-old body still had the same impact on him as it had in the past. He couldn’t keep his hands off of her then, and he couldn’t keep his hands off her now. He wanted to see more.
He got up from the sofa and knelt in front of her. Slowly, he let his hands slide to the waistband of her sweats and inched them down her soft and shapely thighs. He placed his head between her legs and inhaled. The heady scent was all woman, with a hint of Beautiful perfume. He wanted to taste. But in order to do that, he would have to remove the cute little matching pink lace panties.
Her eyes were closed and her head was back, but she lifted just enough to aid him in the removal. He positioned her hips on the edge of the seat and spread her legs before diving in for a more thorough exploration.
It was one of the things he hadn’t done a lot of when they were teenage lovers, but it was something he wouldn’t deny himself now. He let his tongue lap her already wet and slick folds. He teased her pleasure button and grabbed hold of her behind as she started to squirm. He held her hips firmly and fed like a starving man.
“Oh, Jason. Oh, God!” Penny grabbed the back of his head and pulled him into her, even as she tried to move away from the pleasure he was giving her.
He continued to lick and let his tongue travel into her core with all the precision that another part of his body wanted to bring.
Her body rewarded him with the sweet-honeyed flow of her essence, and he gladly took it. He could have tasted her forever, but it had been too long, and he needed to feel her, too.
He took the blanket she’d brought downstairs for him and spread it on the floor.
“I want to make love to you, Penny. I need to. Will you let me make love to you?” He had no idea what he’d do if she said no. He might have to resort to begging.
It might have been a mistake to take a taste of something he thought had been long lost to him. But he had done it, and now she was as much in his system as she was before she broke his heart.
She closed her eyes and then opened them. She stared at him, and it seemed as if time stood still. With her sexy body and her beautiful face flush in the aftermath of her orgasm, it was all he could do to wait for her answer without reaching out and caressing her soft skin.
“I want you, too, Jason. I want you to make love to me.”
He smiled as he stood and held out his hand to her. He positioned her on the blanket.
“We can always go upstairs to the bedroom, you know,” she said as she gazed at him with the stars in her copper eyes that he remembered from high school.
He started removing his own clothes and chuckled. “Next time. I can’t make it upstairs. I need you now.” He took protection out of his wallet and then slung his clothes on the sofa. “I’ve waited a long time for this.”
Penny opened herself to Jason in more ways than one as her thighs circled around his back and her arms closed around his neck. His penetration felt like a homecoming. And the way her heart pumped loudly in her chest, she knew she was giving him more than her body. All the feelings she’d thought were long buried seemed to be bubbling up and taking over.
She let her hands roam over his muscular frame, taking in every new bulge and ripple. His broad and expansive chest felt good to her, as did his firm and taut backside. Even though she could tell with his clothes on that he had become quite the man, nothing could have prepared her for the way he felt as he moved his hips in and out of her.
He took one of her nipples in his mouth and began to suckle, causing her back to arch and her hips to rush and greet his thrust. Each piston down by him was greedily welcomed by a push up from her. They moved in unison, and soon his mouth moved from her nipples to her mouth.
His tongue traced her lips and then dived in. The way his tongue mimicked his manhood took her over the edge. Soon she was crying out in pleasure around his scandalous kiss. Her hips bucked wildly, and she felt herself tighten and release as the most ferocious and mind-blowing spasms she’d ever experienced racked her body.
This seemed to make him want to take her higher, and he began to move even faster and harder. She felt slick and wanton as her orgasm crested and moved quickly into another.
“Jason!” What was he doing to her? “Oh…my…”
He threw his head back and called out her name as he joined her in bliss.
Moments later, wrapped in his arms and lying on a blanket on the floor, Penny waited for the feeling of regret to come over her. She waited, but nothing came.
He touched her face. “Let’s take this to the bedroom now.”
As Jason held Penny in his arms in a comfortable spooning position, he thought it was what he’d always imagined it would be like. When they were two horny teenagers, they hadn’t spent a lot of time spooning after sex. Those stolen moments hadn’t been conducive to lying in each other’s arms and sleeping afterward.
So he appreciated the chance to finally hold her when he woke up in the middle of the night with her perfectly round behind pressed so seductively to his groin.
He glanced around her bedroom and was surprised to see that nothing had changed. Big Mama must have left everything in place, even down to the New Edition posters on the wall. She still had the full-size white canopy bed with gold trimming, with the matching desk and dresser. Even the lilac canopy and bedspread were the same.
He started thinking about all the times they’d spent making out in this room, and realized the trip down memory lane wasn’t helping him control his growing erection. He thought maybe he should try to go back to sleep.
Once they made it upstairs to the bedroom, she’d conked out and he’d dropped off sleeping soon after. Then he’d felt himself automatically responding to Penny’s sweet body as his sex swelled and jutted out. He shifted a little, trying not to wake her, even though her waking up at that moment would have been a blessing.
Moving again, he was surprised when she turned with wide-open eyes and stared at him.
“I thought you’d never wake up,” she said she as reached up and cupped his face in her hands.
He studied her face, checking for any signs of regret, but all he found was desire. He searched his own mind for second thoughts, and even though he still wanted to know what had happened back then, he wanted to be with her in this moment more.
Thinking of the implications of his feelings, he tried to grapple with the fact that, for all intents and purposes, he seemed to be okay with her betrayal.
Had time healed his wounds, or was he just incredibly aroused?
The pressure building in his sex as Penny stroked his cheek answered that question for him. She leaned forward, lightly brushed his lips and tried to pull back. He wasn’t having that, so he gripped her shoulders and held her in place, deepening the kiss.
She moaned into his mouth and slung her leg over his hip. He smiled and let his hands roam her body.
Luscious
was the word that came to mind as he cupped her behind in his hand and squeezed.
Succulent
jumped forth in his head as he moved higher and teased the more than a handful that made up her breasts.
“Amazing…”
He actually mouthed the word into her mouth as his hand trailed back down her belly and dipped into her wet and waiting sex.
She arched her back and rocked her hips as he added another finger to his task and used his thumb to press and stroke her spot of desire. Pulling his mouth away from hers, he moved to her nipples and tasted them. He could have sworn she tasted like brown sugar.
Penny grumbled in complaint when he broke the kiss, but began to mewl with pleasure when he suckled her.
“Mmmm…Jason…” She started to writhe, her words coming out in a soft pant.
He was too busy moving from one breast to the other to answer her. The only thing he knew for certain was, he had to be inside her soon. Then he remembered he had used his one and only condom. He could have taken the time to curse himself, but that would have meant he wouldn’t have the benefit of Penny’s sure-to-be-magnificent orgasm. He kept working on her, delving deeper with his fingers and sucking her already tightened nipples to glorious peaks.
A soft and sexy grunt escaped her lips, and her body twisted, almost making his mouth lose its grasp. But there was no way he was letting go when she was so close. She screamed, and her sex grabbed on to his fingers, desperately pulling them up and in, furiously trying to milk them for all they were worth.
Penny pulled his head from her breasts and planted her lips on his, pushing through with her tongue. The kiss was hard and demanding and clearly an attempt to stop herself from screaming again.
Jason could only smile and join the tongue-wrestling match.
Watching her come down was even more fulfilling than watching her explode. Jason could almost make himself forget about his own growing need.
Almost.
He willed himself to deflate, but it wasn’t working.
Penny let out a deep and fulfilled sigh and opened her eyes. When she noticed his erection, she frowned. “Why’d you stop? Aren’t you forgetting someone?” She reached down and enclosed his manhood in her silky hands.
“No more condoms, baby. Unless you have some?”
She groaned and shook her head. Then she smiled. “That doesn’t mean this guy has to go without.” She started to kiss her way down his chest.
When her sweet and sexy mouth covered him, he moaned and almost exploded at her soft, wet touch. The moment she began to suckle it almost did him in.
“Amazing…”
he said again, in a voice that was between a grunt and a groan.
T
he morning after
…Wasn’t that always when the postloving panic signs started to surface? Jitters? Postorgasmic awareness? Horror? Stone-cold fear? Penny couldn’t believe how much she had let things get out of hand.
She almost dreaded waking up with Jason.
Almost.
Then she felt his strong arms still wrapped around her, holding her close and tight. And she suddenly wished she was having an active enough sex life to keep boxes and boxes of condoms at her disposal.
Talk about wasted opportunity…Urgh!
She sighed.
“What’s that sigh for?” Jason murmured as he kissed the back of her neck.
A tingle spread from her neck to her toes, and she realized she needed to get out of bed in a hurry. Not only did she have to go get a rental car for the rest of her stay in Jersey, she also had to get Carla from the hospital. Add to that the fact that she had a million errands to run in order to tie up Big Mama’s affairs, and she was looking at a very busy day.
But none of those things were the real reason why she had to get out of bed. She had to get out of bed because she didn’t trust herself not to make love with Jason, condoms be damned.
“That sigh was because I don’t feel like getting up yet. But I have a million and one things to do today, including going to get a rental. So…” She pulled away, got up from the bed and stretched.
The way his eyes roamed her naked body as she stretched would have made her feel self-conscious if he hadn’t already kissed every blessed spot on her body and told her repeatedly how beautiful and amazing she was. Her knees started to get weak just from thinking about his homage to her calves, ankles and thighs, to name just three body parts he’d blessed with his mouth. She wasn’t even going to think about the arch of her foot and her toes.
Lord, when did Jason turn into such a foot man? Hello—no more condoms, horny girl.
Penny shook her head to clear it. “I’m going to take a shower and get dressed.”
Jason got up from the bed and took a stretch, too.
Penny’s mouth fell open as she watched his muscles lengthen and move. His biceps…Lord, his biceps…They bulked and pulled, and it was all she could do not to reach out and touch. The six-pack and tightly molded stomach and chest area had her darn near panting. She couldn’t help but look down, and in addition to the rippling mountains of his thighs, she got to see another one of his muscles standing at full attention.
Thinking of the way he’d tasted last night caused a small sensation to travel up her thighs. She so wanted to touch and taste him again. But did she dare? She, more than anyone, knew what her obsession with Jason could lead to, especially when a lack of protection was involved.
She had become darn near addicted to making love to him, almost from the very first time. She had wanted him with a passion that refused to be quelled. Once she had gotten over the initial guilt of having premarital sex and let her love for him and her desire and attraction take over, she’d been a goner. She couldn’t get enough back then, and that was how she’d ended up pregnant.
“I’ll take a shower with you, and then we can kill two birds with one stone. That way, if you don’t mind stopping by my place so I can get into a change of clothes, I can take you to get a rental car before I go to work.”
“Parts of your plan sound good, Jason…”
Too dang good.
She let her eyes zoom back to his prideful manhood standing tall. “But don’t you think it would be a little more than unwise for us to shower together…”
“I promise, anything we do in the shower will be safe.” He gave her that wicked grin of his. “I’m sure you remember, before we actually had sex the first time, we found lots of innovative ways to find release. Feel like playing a little bit more?”
Her heart flip-flopped as it always did when he smiled.
Good God, yes!
But did she trust herself to taste and touch but not go all the way? Sure she did. “Last one in the shower is a scrub.”
She took off to the door and out of her bedroom, with Jason close at her heels. Their lifelong competitive streak kicked in full blast as they raced down the hall to the bathroom.
She remembered every moment of that scandalous shower as she stood in Carla’s room, waiting for the doctors to discharge her mother. She could still feel the tingles on her skin from every place his tongue had touched. She still felt the heavy thudding in her heart as she replayed his parting words. “Next time, we take this to my place. As much as I loved the nostalgia of Big Mama’s house, the thought of making love to you again with Ralph, Ronnie, Johnny, Ricky, Mike and sometimes Bobby watching isn’t sexy.”
She’d playfully slapped him on the arm when he joked about the old New Edition posters still hanging in her bedroom at Big Mama’s. The room had become a shrine to her preteen and teenage years, when she’d had a super crush on the boy band.
However, once she realized her feelings for Jason, there wasn’t a thing any pop singer could have done for her, not even Ralph Tresvant. And she had
loved
Ralph Tresvant.
Penny relished the fact that Jason was hinting that there would be a next time between the two of them.
She knew she had to be careful, though. There might not be any after-sex regrets
yet
. But she knew they were coming.
Jason surely couldn’t have forgiven her if he thought she had really betrayed him with Terrill. And even if he had forgiven her, once he found out it had all been a lie, he would never forgive her for that.
So why was she grinning like a fool and gazing into space at the thought of him making love to her again?
Her heart was only going to end up broken.
“Why you looking all dazed and confused?” Carla nudged her and gave her a thorough once-over.
Penny cleared her throat. “I’m not dazed, or confused.”
“Mmm…hmm…you got that I’m-so-in-love look on your face.” Carla turned up her mouth in disgust. “Aww, man! Don’t do it, Brat.”
“Don’t do what, Carla?”
“Don’t go falling for that uppity Hightower boy again. He’s out of your league. Even though you have made a success of yourself and all that…In this town, with his family, we
still
the underdogs. You need to be checking for that other one.” Carla rolled her eyes and sucked her teeth.
Penny folded her arms across her chest and pursed her lips. Even though Carla was making a huge amount of sense to her at the moment, she found it disturbing that she had sunken to a level where Carla, of all people, had to get her focused and on track.
“What other one?”
“The one in California. Y’all are from the same neighborhood. You both worked your way out of Paterson to Los Angeles…. Plus, he’s gonna make me a star when we move there! Focus, Brat! We need to get on out there today or tomorrow, before you get sidetracked and end up in that Hightower boy’s bed again. Then you’d probably be trying to stay here or something. We need to cut Paterson loose and start over. California, Brat, me and you.
California.
Focus.”
Penny huffed and pointed to the wheelchair. “Get in this thing and let’s go home. I’ve got to get out of here. How do you feel about going with me to handle some of Big Mama’s affairs? I’m not sure how I feel about leaving you in the house alone, especially since you won’t come clean about who attacked you.”
Carla got in the wheelchair. “We need to just leave and go to L.A. You can handle the rest of that stuff by phone. You ain’t gotta stay here for that. I don’t feel like riding around and sitting in no car.”
Penny started rolling Carla’s mouthy behind down the corridor. “Oh, but you’re up for a four-hour plane ride to the West Coast?”
“Yep. I thought you’d never ask. When do we leave?”
“
We
aren’t leaving. I’m going back when I get done settling Big Mama’s estate. And I haven’t decided what I’m going to do with you yet.”
Carla sucked her teeth. “Well, I guess you’ll be coming back to bury me soon enough. But don’t worry, you won’t be here long settling my affairs, ’cause I ain’t got nothing.”
Now why did she have to say that? Penny thought of finding Carla on the floor bleeding. She knew she wasn’t ready to lose her mother. But was she really ready for Carla to move to Los Angeles?
As they made it to the hospital exit, she saw her father coming in.
“Don’t you have work or something? What’re you doing back here? We fine. We don’t need you, Gerald.” Carla’s agitated voice held just a hint of panic.
Gerald simply gazed at Carla. “Well, I figured I’d come back and check up on you anyway.”
Either he’s getting off on annoying the heck out of Carla, or he’s really in love with her.
Penny chuckled at her thoughts. The look in his eyes was definitely the expression of a man in love, not a man playing games. Penny couldn’t believe the devotion she saw shining in her father’s eyes.
The way Carla constantly dissed the man, Penny was surprised he even bothered. Penny decided right then and there that she’d make more of an effort to get to know her father. It was only fair.
“I’m glad you’re here, Gerald. I’d love it if you could stay at the house with my mother while I go and handle some errands. I shouldn’t be more than a few hours, and I don’t want to leave her alone in the house, since she won’t say who attacked her and they might come back.” She gave Carla a pointed look.
Gerald’s face lit up as he nodded in agreement. “That’s a great idea, Penny. I’d be happy to stay with her and watch over her.”
Carla made a show of sucking her teeth.
“What? Oh, what part of the damn game is this?” Carla hissed before turning her lips up. “How the two of you gonna just gang up on me? Brat, you hardly know this man. You’ve known me all your life. And yet you side with him? I’ll tell ya, the game done changed. No loyalty at all.”
“I’m looking out for your best interests. So let’s get you home and settled, so I can do what I have to do. The sooner I’m done, the sooner I can be back and relieve you of your torture.”
“I don’t need him to stay with me. I’ll be fine.”
“Well, I’ll worry less with him there. What if the attacker comes back, Carla?” Penny shuddered at the thought.
The mention of the possibility of another attack must have gotten through to Carla.
“Fine. Fine. It’s not like you ever listen to me anyway. Nobody ever listens to me.” Carla sulked, but at least she stopped arguing.
Penny gave her father a weary look and almost pitied him until she noticed he still had that awestruck expression on his face as he gazed at Carla. She guessed he was happy any time he could spend time with Carla.
Love must make people crazy!
Penny mused as she vowed to try and keep her own ever-growing insanity in check.
Jason spent part of his day at the downtown precinct going through the now reopened murder case that had sent Gerald to prison for a crime he didn’t commit. He also went back over Gerald’s record. Even if the man hadn’t been the one to attack Carla, Jason had a nagging suspicion Gerald was somehow connected.
The murdered couple had been Good Samaritan community activists. They had been known to call in and report drug deals or any other crimes going on. Technically, any of the criminals they had reported could have been the one to kill them. It just so happened that Gerald had been the last person seen in the area and he’d argued with the husband about their snitching on him. Most of the evidence against him had been circumstantial. But it had been enough to convince a jury to find him guilty.
Lucky for Gerald, both victims had gotten DNA evidence from the real murderer on them. The technology hadn’t been as sophisticated then as it was now. But advances had helped to clear him some thirty years later, and the same technology would help the police to find and arrest the real murderer.
Jason couldn’t figure out why he had a feeling the two cases might be connected. But he never ignored a hunch. Even if the two cases weren’t connected, his feelings about Penny seemed to give both of her parents’ cases priority in his mind.
Jason knew Carla’s history wasn’t squeaky-clean. From what he could remember, she used to run with a pretty wild crowd, especially when she was hooked on crack. But based on what he’d seen of her over the past five years, and his visits with Big Mama, he thought she’d left all that behind her.
Whoever beat her the other day hadn’t stolen anything. In his mind, that ruled out any of her junkie friends.
On the other hand, Gerald was a former dealer and street hustler. Based on what Jason had read, Gerald hadn’t been big-time, but he’d seemed to be headed in that direction before the murder charge. Maybe one of Gerald’s enemies was using Carla to send a message to Gerald. Maybe one of his enemies had set him up for the murder. And if that was the case, how long would it take before he upped the ante and harmed Penny?
Rubbing his head in frustration, he leaned back in his chair. He had to find a way to get Carla to talk. Or maybe he could get Old Lady Henderson back down here to look at some more mug shots. He needed a name and a face. He needed to find the culprit and get rid of any threat to Penny.
Thinking about Penny’s mother’s case provided a nice distraction from his other thoughts of Penny. He couldn’t believe he’d actually made love to her. How had he gone from wanting answers and closure to darn near starting another relationship?
And what would he do if he…no,
when
he got the answers he’d waited all these years for? Because he was just as determined as ever to find out the truth. If anything, making love to her had made him desire the truth even more. But he had said he wouldn’t badger her about it until he found out what happened to Carla.
What kind of idiotic promise was that?