Pulse of Heroes (76 page)

“Michelle,” he whispered into her ear between
kisses, “I love you so much. I know you love me too, but after all
you’ve been through I don’t think…” Michelle kissed his neck and
told him not to think. She didn’t want him to treat her like a
little girl anymore, and besides, Haden had tried to force himself
on her and she wanted to make sure that Elliot was the guy whom she
gave herself to. That way no one could ever take her again. And
what’s more, she felt that she needed Elliot to prove his love to
her, and she couldn’t think of any other way in which he could.
With her lips still around his, she slowly began to lower her
underwear. Elliot grabbed her hands so she couldn’t move them. She
looked at him, confused and hurt.

“I don’t understand?” she asked, her eyes
growing larger than life. “Don’t you love me?” Elliot’s chest rose
and fell with his deep breaths. She kissed him again, but this time
he remained rigid. Her love rejected, Michelle hurled herself
backwards on the mattress like an angry spoiled child. She felt
awful and embarrassed. Did she do something wrong? Did he not like
her that way? Elliot knew that he had hurt Michelle’s feelings,
initially, but in the long run it was what was best for her. He
pulled his shirt back on, buttoned it, and moved over to sit by her
side. He tried to look at her face but she buried it into the
pillow.

“Michelle, I love you and I want you more
than anything in the world, but I don’t think that this is the
right time.” He kissed her shoulders. Michelle didn’t respond.
“You’ve gone through so much in this past week, and I think you’re
confused enough. This will only make it worse.” Elliot lay down
next to Michelle and curved his body around hers. “I love you so
much, my little woman, don’t be sad or hurt.” He kissed her neck
many times until Michelle finally turned to face him and he saw her
tears. He gently kissed them away.

“I don’t understand. I wanted to show you how
much I love you. I thought we’d be closer.” Elliot smiled softly
and laid small kisses all over her face.

“You really believe that the ultimate way for
me to know how much you love me is through sex?” he asked. Michelle
blushed.

“No… I thought that you, we, were going to
make love,” she whispered, disappointed.

“We will, many more times than you could ever
ask for. But trust me as someone who’s more experienced than you.
This is not what you need right now. You haven’t mourned, you
haven’t even made peace with what has happened. You need to heal.”
He tapped her lightly on her bandage. “Yes, making love will bring
us closer forever, but it takes two people to make love. My heart
tells me that what you really want is reassurance and a sanctuary.
You want me to be here for you, something solid. I understand all
of that, sweetie, there’s nothing wrong with that.” He took her
hand and put it over his heart. “Feel? That’s real.” He then looked
deep into her eyes. “Look, they’re real too and they love you. Let
us just wait until the storm passes.” Michelle wanted him to
explain. “It would make it very difficult for you to go back to
school and to your old life,” he chuckled, “and it would definitely
complicate things for me too. You know, the whole idea that men
don’t feel any attachment to the women that they’re intimate with
is a lie that has been perpetuated for ages? Michelle, I know how I
get. I would want to keep you all to myself, and I would take you
somewhere far away where we could be alone together all of the
time. I wouldn’t want to share you with anyone, especially not your
friends, or even your parents. But I want you to go back to school
in the fall. I want you to graduate with your friends, and to see
the proud faces of your parents when you do. I refuse to steal you
away from what is rightfully yours. I’ve had plenty of my own life,
it’s your turn now. It’s important that you fully experience what
your culture offers as your rightful life. It’s beautiful.”

“I don’t understand what the two have to do
with one another?” Michelle asked, puzzled and hurt. She turned
away from him. Elliot realized that Michelle had no way to see into
the future, not the way he could. She just didn’t have the
experience.

“Michelle, look at me,” he asked softly, but
she shook her head. He asked her again, this time rolling her over
on her back and forcing her hands away from her face. He smiled and
pecked her grumpy lips. “Do you want me to go to jail? You’re only
seventeen!”

“You had no problem doing it with those
Indian girls in the pool, or with your six wives. Do you think I
don’t know about that too? How old were they when you went with
them? What’s wrong with me? Why do you treat me like a child?”
Michelle whined and folded her arms together. Elliot was perplexed
and wondered what else she had seen.

“Michelle, you ARE being childish. First of
all, it was only five of them,” he thought for a moment, “and let
me see, that was over four thousand years ago! I can’t believe
this!” he exclaimed, laughing.

“So that makes it all right? I’m sure you had
no problem enjoying all those ‘young’ women around you then, ready
to serve your every need,” Michelle shot back. Elliot rolled his
eyes and tried to explain that everything was different then.

“Ok, I’ll tell you how it was and we’ll see
if you’re satisfied. First, my wife’s sister lost her husband and
already had a child. It was obligatory for me to marry her and take
care of her, otherwise she would be destitute. On top of which
there was a shortage of men back then. Many died in wars and others
couldn’t afford to marry and take care of a family. Life was tough,
no one had surpluses like they do today. I was wealthy and fathers
came to me so I could take care of their daughters because they
couldn’t anymore. There were only three options for women at that
time: to marry, become a servant, or be a prostitute. And yes, they
were younger, but they weren’t children anymore. People only lived
into their late thirties or mid forties at the most. You at
seventeen would be an old maid by now.” Elliot laughed, but
Michelle failed to see the humor. He tried to convince her that it
was hard enough to please one woman, which was what he was trying
to do at that exact moment. He told her about the endless fights
and jealousies, with his children constantly pitted against their
half siblings

“It was absolute madness, and very difficult
on everyone.” He found that he could only really love one woman at
a time, his original wife. To the others, he showed affection and
took care of them by fulfilling his husbandly duties, including
having sex with them. It wasn’t physically a painful experience, he
wasn’t going to lie to Michelle, but it felt wrong. “After making
love to my real wife, it felt empty for me, like eating when you’re
not truly hungry. I don’t know how else to describe it. My first
wife was always on my mind when I was with them, because I knew how
much it hurt her. And they never got to feel the passion of someone
being truly in love with them. It didn’t matter what they had in
material things when their souls were starved.” Michelle saw the
twinge of pain in his eyes. Elliot assured her that he never
repeated that mistake again.

“I can’t believe that I’m supposed to feel
sorry for you now? That you had five women fighting over your
attention? Cause I’m not,” Michelle said in anger. Elliot refused
to talk about the Indian women. It wasn’t healthy or smart for her
to know about every aspect of his sexual history. It was unnatural
for Michelle to know about thousands of years of his relationships
from the past. It would only serve to destroy their future. That he
had enjoyed the company of women in the past was just something
that she was going to have to deal with. Michelle told him that he
was a pig. Creatively changing the subject, Elliot asked when she
would be turning eighteen. She counted the months on her
fingers.

“Seven months… that’s almost a year!
Why?”

“I was just wondering how we should celebrate
your birthday. And besides, what are you so scared of?” he asked,
gathering her to him. Michelle laid her head on his chest and
looked up into his eyes.

“That you’ll go with someone else. That you
won’t wait for me.” Elliot smiled and told her to stop batting her
eyelashes at him because it wasn’t going to work. But Michelle felt
him waver and raised herself on top of his chest, kissing him
softly and then more passionately until Elliot had to physically
remove her off him, all the while laughing because she was trying
her best to change his mind.

“You don’t know how tired you look, do you?”
he asked, a wide grin across his face. He patted the mattress next
to him. “Here, just lie next to me. We’re both going to relax for a
while, close our eyes, ok?” Elliot took a deep breath, noticing
that Michelle’s heart was beating faster, racing to catch up with
his own; they were nearly in unison. He could sense her small
capillaries opening up like the petals of a flower, delivering the
extra life force that brought a fresh flush under her skin to
awaken her. Now Michelle’s body was aligned with her thoughts, and
called for his. He wanted to change his mind. He wanted to be
inside her and see the ecstasy and pleasure on her face as they
became two people in one body, stripped down to their souls. “Feel
the gentle swaying of the boat?” he asked, stroking her hair.
Michelle closed her eyes and snuggled next to him. He haphazardly
covered her body with her dress so he wouldn’t be tempted. They lay
there, rocking gently afloat on the sparkling water, listening to
the strum of the lines against the mast and the seagulls calling
out for one another. Out of nowhere, Elliot began to chuckle, and
his laughter got louder and louder until Michelle couldn’t take it
anymore.

“What’s so funny? You’re hurting my
feelings,” she said, sitting up so she could see his face. In one
move, Elliot pulled Michelle on top of him and showered her with
kisses.

“You’re what’s funny, Michelle. I was ready
to die for you. How much more do you want me to love you? I’m
begging for mercy here.” Michelle was forced to smile at his
beautiful face, especially as his eyes sparkled with every laugh.
“And besides, I’ve waited my whole entire life. I’m always waiting.
How could you possibly think that I wouldn’t wait for you? I have
all the time in the world.”

Dear Michelle,

If you are reading this then I hope you are
well and I hope you don’t rip this letter up before you finish it.
Yes, I know that I owe you an apology and I'm very sorry for
misleading you. I really did enjoy our times together and I wish
that Hadeno had nothing to do with us at all. All I know is that he
asked me to bring you around because he said you had some
information about this Elliot. He told me that it wasn’t you he was
after and that he wouldn’t hurt you. After that, I don’t know what
exactly happened. When I found out about Adi's death I really just
checked out. It was too much for me to bear and I’m still hurting a
lot and feel so alone. Now more than ever.

You must have figured out by now that Hadeno
is my father, not my brother. I know you understand about their
kind because you know Elliot. The problem is that I haven’t seen my
dad for months now, and I don’t know where he is. He has never left
me for so long, and especially after my mother died he has been
around a lot more. His voicemail is full and I keep going back to
the house to try to find any clue where he might be, but there's
nothing. I'm starting to worry very badly that there might be
something wrong. I know that he might be involved in what happened
to Adi, but I could never be sure. And even if he did do it, he did
it because he loves me in his own way. He’s not all bad, I hope you
know. If you have any idea where my dad went or what is going on, I
beg you to tell me because I'm going crazy. If he’s gone then I
really am all alone, and that scares me. I need to know. Please… my
father is all the family I have left in the world. Other than
Elliot.

If you are still in touch with Elliot maybe
you can let him know that he is my father's brother from many
thousands of years ago, and that he has a niece in Europe. I’m
including my address in London because I am going to school here
now. I hope you can forgive me.

Sincerely,

Vilna

Look for the next exciting installment in
The
Pulse
series!

Release Date - October 31st, 2011

A. Jacob Sweeny holds a degree in History
with an emphasis on Ancient Near East. Her immersion in world myths
and her archaeological fieldwork provided the initial spark that
led to the development of
Pulse Of Heroes
. She has always
been fascinated by the awesome power of words to excite and inspire
the mind, and sought to combine her love of writing with her
passion for the past.