Pursued (21 page)

“Swells inside? How?” she demanded. “That would never fit in…in most girls.”

“Compounds in my precum help get you ready.” His deep voice was hoarse as she continued to stroke him. “Makes you able to stretch—to accommodate the fist with no pain. Just pleasure.”

“In your precum?” Elise let her fingers trail from the mating fist at the base of his shaft, up to the flaring crown, which was now shiny with clear fluid. Carefully, she rubbed her thumb over the satiny smooth skin, spreading the slippery precum over the sensitive head of his cock.

Merrick groaned again and thrust up into her hand. “Look baby, I love the way you touch me but you’d better stop now,” he warned. “Not unless you want me to come.”

For a moment Elise considered it. But it seemed to too much—going too far. She’d sworn to herself this wasn’t going to get sexual and now here she was, practically jerking him off.
I’m engaged,
she reminded herself guiltily as she reluctantly pulled back her hand.
I shouldn’t be doing this. I should only do what I have to in order to satisfy the hunger.

The only problem was, the
hunger
was in no way satisfied. Elise wanted more, somehow, but she didn’t know what. More touching? More
sexual
touching?
Maybe I just need to use more than my hands,
she thought a bit desperately as the
hunger
gnawed at her middle.
Maybe if I pressed against him…

The idea had upset her at first but now that she felt more familiar with Merrick’s big body, she was also more comfortable with the idea of a completely naked hug. Slowly, carefully, she moved forward, putting her arms around his neck and pressing her chest to his.

“Nice,” Merrick rumbled softly. “I like the feel of you against me.”

“I…I like it too,” Elise admitted a bit breathlessly. The warm sensation of his hard, muscular chest beneath her own soft breasts felt wonderful. She could feel his heart drumming too, a slower, deeper cadence than her own lighter, faster beat. His scent—the warm, masculine musk that reminded her of smoke and fur—seemed to pervade her senses completely, making her feel safe. It was better—much better…but still not quite good enough. She wanted, no—
needed—
more contact. More of his skin against hers. But how?

“Climb up the rest of the way if you want,” Merrick invited softly. “Lie down on me.”

“I…” Elise bit her lip. “I wouldn’t want to uh, squish you.”

To her surprise, he threw his head back against the pillow and roared with genuine amusement. “
You
squish
me?
Baby, you’re
tiny
.”

“I’m just petite,” Elise protested primly. “Which doesn’t bother me, by the way. I like being small and compact. It makes my opponents in the court room underestimate me.”

“Anyone would be a fool to do that.” He was still smiling, a hint of his fangs showing from beneath his sensuous upper lip. “But it’s good to like yourself. I like being big, too. Big enough for you to lie on me—if you want.”

So they were back to that.
He really wants me to,
she realized.
As much as I want to, I think.
“All right,” she said aloud. “But don’t blame me if you feel squished.” Carefully, slowly, she shifted her weight so that she was lying on him completely.

Merrick was on his back now with his bound hands under him. It couldn’t have been comfortable but he didn’t complain, just lay there quietly as she settled on top of him. Her breasts flattened out against his chest and he was so tall his thick shaft branded her thigh instead of her belly. Elise thought about moving so that she didn’t touch him there…and didn’t. Instead, she relaxed on top of him, enjoying the full body contact, feeling like a kitten cuddling with a Great Dane.

The warmth of his big body enveloped her, filling her with a sense of well-being she couldn’t deny. At last she began to feel the gnawing
hunger
retreat somewhat and a sense of peace took its place. This was good—this was
right
in a way she couldn’t deny. At the back of her head she knew it was just the fake bond making her feel this way, telling her she needed the big Kindred, needed to touch him and be touched by him. But somehow she didn’t care. Fake bond or not, it felt wonderful and she didn’t want to spoil the lovely sensation with over-analysis.

But as the
hunger
decreased, her other need grew. Lust flared to life inside her once more, licking at her inner thighs like a fire. She began to be hyperaware of the thick length of Merrick’s cock against her thigh, began to think about how close it was to her pussy, which was throbbing and hot and needy.

But I don’t want him in me. I don’t want
anyone
there!
she thought, panicking a little.
I can’t…not after…

The door of the vault shuddered as though something inside it was trying to get out. Desperately, Elise worked to keep it closed.
I don’t want to think about that. About any of it. This is so nice—why do I have to ruin it by wanting something sexual?
And yet, she did. There was no denying it, her pussy was hot and her nipples were tight. How could
she
, who had been happily frigid for so long, suddenly want this so badly? It didn’t make sense and yet there was no denying this feeling inside her. This need to be touched, to be stroked and pleasured and made to come…

“Elise?” Merrick shifted under her and she looked up to see his nostrils flaring rhythmically.

“Yes? Am I getting too heavy?” She prepared to get off him but his next words stopped her.

“You’re fine—stay put and tell me what’s wrong.”

“What…what do you mean? There’s nothing wrong,” she protested. “I just can’t quite…seem to get…comfortable.” As she spoke she pressed against him as though trying to find a better spot.

“How comfortable do you need to be?” Somehow his leg slipped between hers and she felt the warm, muscular ridge of his thigh press hard against her pussy.

“Oh!” The word left her lips in a little gasp of embarrassment. She was probably getting him all wet! “Oh, I…I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean…”

“Don’t be sorry. I’m not.” He shifted, pressing his thigh upward, rubbing against her, forcing her to ride him.

“Oh…” Elise breathed again. She could feel her swollen outer pussy lips opening, spreading for him as though of their own volition. Her slippery inner cunt and her sensitive clit were laid bare, rubbing against his hard thigh in a way that made her moan aloud.

“You like that?” Merrick moved again, sending another shower of pleasure sparks pulsing through her body. “You like to ride me, baby?”

“I…yes. Yes, I do,” Elise admitted, unable to help herself. But though the feel of his thigh pressed against her throbbing button was amazing, it
still
wasn’t quite enough. Moaning in frustration, she rubbed against him, feeling like she was going to go crazy if the sensation building inside her didn’t come to a peak soon. She needed something—needed to come, she was sure of that. But how? To her secret shame she’d never had an orgasm before and so had no idea how to go about doing it now.

“You okay, baby?” Merrick asked, obviously sensing her frustration.

“Yes…no.” Elise let out a little moan of dissatisfaction. “I just…I can’t quite…this isn’t enough somehow.”

Merrick’s answer was immediate and mirrored her own thoughts. “You need to come.”

“How…how could you possibly know that?” Elise demanded, feeling her cheeks get hot. “How—?”

“Told you, I can smell it on you. You’re hot but you’ve hit a wall. You need to go up and over—let yourself soar.”

“All right, fine. But how?” Elise demanded, feeling frustrated.

“Easy. Touch yourself.” He sounded so matter of fact about it, as though it was no big deal. But it
was
a big deal to Elise—a very big deal. Letting the sexual part of herself out enough to actively pursue pleasure was frightening and foreign. She didn’t know if she could do it.

Elise bit her lip. “I…I’ve never…”

“Never?” he demanded, frowning.

“If I have, I don’t remember it,” Elise said defensively. Drawing away from him, she moved back to her side of the bed and crossed her legs tightly. “I just…I try not to think about things like this. So I never…never need to, you know…do that.”

Merrick’s response surprised her. “Let me help you.”

“Help me what?”

“Come.” He looked up at her and now she was certain he could see her through the black lace of the blindfold. “Let me help you come.”

“How…how would you do that?” Elise could feel her breath coming short and she squeezed her thighs tightly together, as though to hide her need.

“Remember what I told you on our ride back to the Mother Ship? That I wanted to taste you?” His deep voice was filled with desire—desire for
her
, Elise realized. Desire to spread her legs and taste and suck and lick her naked pussy. The idea was both titillating and terrifying—and completely too much.

“I…oh. Oh, no!” She pressed her thighs together even tighter. “I couldn’t let you do that. I just
couldn’t.”

“All right then.” He sighed. “I figured that might be going too far but I had to ask. You smell so damn good I couldn’t help it.”

“I…oh. Well, thank you.” She nodded uncertainly. “Look, maybe we should just forget it. I’m feeling much better now and—”

“Is the
hunger
gone? Completely gone?” Merrick asked.

Elise opened her mouth to lie…and then remembered he could feel what she felt. “No,” she admitted at last in a small voice. “No…but it
is
much better.”

“And it’s gonna get much fucking
worse
again if you don’t let yourself come,” Merrick said firmly. “Look, Sylvan said it might get sexual so this shouldn’t be a surprise. If you don’t want my help, you’re going to have to manage it yourself—I'm betting it’s the only way to back the
hunger
off for any length of time.”

“Fine.” Elise lifted her chin. “I…I’ll manage.” After all, how hard could it be?

Scooting backwards so that she was sitting with her back against the headboard, she got settled and took a deep breath. She gave another quick look at Merrick, wondering if he was watching her beneath the blindfold. He just lay there quietly, saying nothing, obviously waiting for her to work it out herself.
Which I am perfectly capable of doing,
Elise told herself sternly.

Casting another quick, furtive glance at Merrick, she slipped one hand between her thighs and began to rub her sensitive mound. At first it seemed things were going well but then Elise began to feel nervous.
Had
she ever done this before? She had told Merrick she hadn’t, but now she wondered. This all seemed familiar. Familiar and dangerous. But then, anything sexual felt dangerous and always had. Ever since…

She put it in the vault quickly and tried to continue but now she seemed to have lost momentum. The sensations were good but not quite right somehow. It was almost as though her pussy was
too
sensitive. As though she needed to come so badly her most delicate parts had become too swollen and needful to help her get where she needed to go.
Damn it!
Clenching her jaw, she made a little noise of frustration.

“You’re doing it wrong.” Merrick’s deep voice startled her. He’d been quiet for so long and Elise had been concentrating so intently, she’d almost forgotten he was there.

“You’re watching me,” she accused him.

“I’m
listening
to you. You’ve got no rhythm.”

“Rhythm? What are you talking about?”

He sighed. “You have to get a rhythm going. Have to fall into the groove and work at it—it’s almost like a dance.”

“Maybe it’s that way for guys but—”

“It’s that way for everyone,” he interrupted. “Doesn’t matter which kind of equipment you’ve got, you have to work it right.”

“Is that so?” Feeling embarrassed and irritated, Elise put a hand on her hip. “If you know so much, why don’t you just show me how it’s done?”

“Show you?” His eyebrows raised above the blindfold. “You want me to touch you? Want me to make you come, baby?”

The idea sent her heart skittering in her chest. “No, I don’t want you to show me on
me
,” she said rather breathlessly. “Show me on
yourself
. Since…since you said it’s all the same.”

A look of amusement crossed his face. “Well, sure, if you want. I don’t usually perform for an audience but I don’t mind if you want to watch.”

“Yes. Yes, I do.” Elise envied him his easy sexuality. How nice it must be not to have to hide that part of yourself away! To actually be able to
enjoy
it. Her own sex drive was like a monster in the closet—something she was afraid to let out. Or
had
been afraid to let out until now, anyway. And she still wasn’t sure how well it was going. “Well?” she said to Merrick.

He cocked his head to one side. “Well what? I’m pretty fucking talented in the sexual arena but not even I can jerk off with my hands behind my back.”

“Oh! Oh, of course.” Elise felt like a fool. Of
course
he couldn’t do anything before she released him from the cuffs. She went around behind him and inserted the small magnetic key. She was about to turn it when Merrick said,

“Stop.”

“What is it?” She looked at him uncertainly.

“Take off the blindfold. Let me look at you.”

She did as he asked and found herself looking into his startlingly strange and beautiful eyes. “What is it?” she asked, feeling slightly inhibited now that she was absolutely
sure
he could see her. She fought the urge to cross her arms over her breasts and won—just barely.

“I want to make sure you’re comfortable with this. With me being unbound.” He looked at her meaningfully. “I don’t want to scare you, baby. Don’t want to lose any of the ground we’ve gained.”

Elise was touched by his concern. She took a moment to think—really think about what he was asking her. Yes, he was still huge and male and yes, they were both naked but somehow the time they’d spent working slowly up to this point had made her feel comfortable with that. Or, if not exactly comfortable, at least not frightened any more.