Rebirth - The Beautiful Fallen (38 page)

             
“You don’t have to worry about Chris now you know.  Nothing else can happen now if he’s really dead.” I said.  I knew what she was probably thinking, but I wasn’t about to tell her the truth.  That night would always be my wonderful little secret.

             
“I doubt that he is.  I wouldn’t be that lucky.  But enough of that.  We should get you back inside before it starts getting cold out here.  This fog hanging around does that at times here in Baton Rouge.” Mama said.

             
I nodded, following her inside.  Coming in though, we were greeted by Zane.  It seemed that he had finished what he’d been doing, and was putting away his supplies in one of the closets.  “Well, good morning.  I’m glad to see you’re finally up.” he said happily.

             
It was funny for me to stand there and look at him then.  For the first time ever, I really found myself taking him in.  And for the first time, I noticed something a little bit different about him.  Though he was smiling and seemed happy, his eyes didn’t look that way at all.  In fact, they looked almost sad.  I couldn’t help but wonder now if he’d just been acting for my benefit in all of this time.  Maybe what had happened to us had really affected him a lot deeper than he wanted to ever admit.

             
Still, I forced myself to smile back at him.  I felt like it was better not to let on my own feelings about that yet.  Maybe I could talk to him later about it.  “Good morning.” I replied, trying to sound more upbeat.  I had to admit that I liked having this familiar feeling now.  And I really felt like I needed it too.

             
Mama shook her head as she looked at him though.  “I swear, you haven’t changed at all in these last forty years, have you?” she commented.

             
“It’s the gift and curse of what we are.  Our clocks simply stop after we get our wings and change.” Zane told her.

             
I found myself looking back up at Mama with a little bit of surprise.  “You knew Zane before?” I asked her.

             
“Yes.  We met when I was a little girl.  He actually taught a few classes in my school.  Although I wouldn’t have imagined then that he was a Fallen Child.  I have to say that I was a bit surprised when I came here and realized that he was the same person.” Mama replied.

             
“I am what they like to call an unlikely Shadow Wing.  But I am just as strong as the others.  Looking harmless is a bonus when it comes to all of this.” Zane said.  I’ll be the first to admit that he sounded like my father with that one.  That was kind of scary.

             
“I suppose.” Mama said, coughing a little.

             
“Why don’t you come with me now Ariana?  I wanted to show you around the house some.  You don’t mind if I steal her for a while, do you Mabel?” Zane said, looking back over at her as he took my hand and pulled me close beside him.

             
“No, not at all.” Mama breathed, turning and walking back towards the kitchen again.  I didn’t miss that she looked a little more pale now.  Not to mention that she also was breathing a little bit harder.

             
“Is she okay?” I asked Zane softly as I watched her leave us.

             
Zane shook his head, leading us back up the nearby stairs.  “I’m afraid not.  Unfortunately, beings she’s used up her usefulness to Saffron, she’s beginning to succumb to her original illness.  Saffron only stopped it for the time to make sure that you’d be taken care of.  But at least he’s allowing her to come here and be with you until that time comes.  It’s been an unexpected bit of mercy from one like him, although I look for him to keep her suffering for a while, just to outweigh that.” he explained quietly.

             
So she really was sick after all.  That explained some things from the past.  In a way, it made me feel a little bit guilty for doubting her sanity before.  And it was so sad for me to think that she was dying now, all because I was grown and changed.  Hopefully, it wouldn’t be too slow and painful like Zane seemed to be thinking.  I couldn’t bear the thought of that one.  Not with everything else that had already happened.  “So what were you painting out there anyways?” I asked, trying to change the subject as we walked down the hall.

             
“Just some scenery.  This is a beautiful plantation home after all.  But more to the point, I’m glad to see you're up and about again.  I was starting to worry that you may never come back to us.” Zane admitted.

             
“I’m sorry.  I guess I really was losing it for a while.” I apologized.

             
“Don’t worry too much about it.  I think Will and I can understand that all too well.  We’re still pretty torn up over what’s happened with Christoff.  It’s been hard for us to think that we may never see him again.” Zane said.

             
“You know, Saffron seems to think that he might still be alive.” I told him.

             
“It’s quite possible, given the circumstances.  But things are far too fragile right now for him to return anywhere near us.  I’m a little worried that he may never be able to, considering all of the powers involved as of this time.” Zane replied.

             
“I guess you’re right.  Maybe there is no choice but for me to accept that now.” I agreed.  I couldn't help but feel very sad as I did though.  I wasn't sure if I could ever get myself over Chris.  And yet, I may have to, if I'd truly lost him forever.

             
Zane stopped and turned to face me again.  To my surprise, he gently touched my cheek.  “I am glad to see you moving about again.  I’ve been pretty worried myself.  And I know how hard this all has been on you.  I just wish there was more I could do to help you.” He admitted.

             
I found myself staring into those green eyes as I stood there.  And once again, I could see what seemed like a lot of sadness there.  It was odd for me to see that with him.  Zane just never seemed like the type to be this way.  “Did I really scare you that much?” I had to ask.

             
“Well, quite a bit more then I like to admit to.  I was beginning to think that perhaps I would end up completely alone again.  And more than that, I really didn’t want to see anything more happen to you.  I feel bad enough that I wasn’t able to do more to help.” Zane explained.

             
“But you did help.  You stayed with me, even when I kept trying to make you leave.  And I’m grateful for that.” I said, hugging him.

             
For a moment, we just stood there like that.  It was funny how comforting this embrace felt to me.  But deep inside, I felt a strange worry too.  Something really seemed off about Zane now.  I just hoped I could help him with whatever it was.

             
After a moment, I heard him speak again.  “Thank you for this.  I’m glad you’re still with me now.” He said.  And with that, he gently pulled away.  As I watched, he looked back at the door we were standing in front of.  As he quietly opened it, I peeked inside.

             
The room itself was darkened with all of the curtains drawn, but I could see Will lying there in the bed.  I didn’t think that he was sleeping though.  Instead, he seemed to be trying to make himself a little bit more comfortable.  Again, I pictured the bandages around his chest.  Now that I thought about it, it had seemed like he had been in a lot of pain earlier.  And he’d looked awful pale.  “Is he going to be okay?” I couldn’t help but ask.

             
“He’s getting better, although he’s going to have a longer recovery.  It’s a miracle that he survived at all.  That wound gashed open one of the outer chambers of his heart.  But somehow, Saffron was able to save him from bleeding to death.  The recovery’s been painful though.  I was a bit surprised that he was even able to get moving around this morning like he was.  But it seems like he was also determined to apologize to you himself.  I was a bit surprised, but I can’t say much to that.  After all, he did owe you one.” Zane explained.

             
“It was really that bad?” I whispered.  I really hadn’t considered how bad it may have been before.  But hearing that, I understood that Will was truly lucky to be alive.  Again though, I thought of what Saffron had said.  Will had a connection to Lucifer.  He’d been under orders to do what he’d done.  Apparently, this all had something to do with them getting to Judiel and those other angels.  But why did he choose Will?  What made him so superior?

             
Zane nodded at my words, gently putting an arm around my waist and leading us into the room and closing the door quietly.  The room was indeed a bit darker than the rest of the house, but we could still see perfectly.  I sat myself down on the side of the bed by Will as Zane quietly walked to the other side and lifted the blanket and back of his shirt to check his bandages.  “Everything looks in order still.  All you need for now is to rest.” he said quietly.

             
“Is this much pain really divine justice?” Will said breathlessly, glancing up at him.

             
“Like I said before, it very well could be.  Just be glad that we’re actually taking care of you.” Zane replied.  His voice sounded a little bit colder now.  But in a way, it didn’t surprise me.  I had the distinct feeling that Zane was still blaming Will for all of this as well.  As much as he apparently didn’t want to lose him, he couldn’t quite get over what had happened because of his orders.

             
“Regeneration shouldn’t be this painful.  I should’ve figured out something for that.  Maybe I’ll work on that once I’m better.  I need to get out of that fashion industry anyways.  It’s far too much work anymore.” Will complained softly, closing his eyes again.

             
“What do you mean?” I asked, not following him.

             
“It’s another thing that Will’s always dabbled in.  He’s been studying medicine for over a hundred years now.” Zane told me as he took a seat in the chair beside us.

             
“Really?  So you didn’t just work in the fashion world?” I said.

             
“That’s just been a fun hobby.  But like I said, it’s been getting old lately.  My real passion has always been science.  It’s just so interesting to me.  Being able to dissect things, seeing how they work.  Creation itself.  We defy every single thing that science and nature knows to be true, yet we’re living, breathing beings.  Even death itself defies it.  I want to be able to explain it all, even though I know it’s not possible and he keeps telling me that it’s pointless for me to even think so much about it all.  So I started with myself back then, and seeing my own regeneration.  It’s always been fascinating.  Too bad I can’t watch my own heart repair itself.” Will said, chuckling slightly even though it was obviously painful for him to do so.

             
“You're a complete mess.  Only you would want to do such a thing.  But you need to rest now.  It will go a lot slower if you don’t, and you’re well aware of that.” Zane told him.

             
“I would, but the pain won't allow it.  You know that from your own wounds.  But lucky you that they’ve already healed.  But cuts heal quicker than straight through open wounds on us.  Especially ones as large as what I have.” Will said.

             
“Don’t worry her so with such terrible things.  You’ve worried her enough.” Zane scolded him.

             
I couldn’t help but feel bad then.  It was no good to see a friend in pain, even if he’d brought it on himself.  “Maybe I can help.” I offered, laying a hand on his side.  This was a trick that I hadn’t told them about, and that I’d learned with Chris only a month before.  He’d usually end up pretty sore from sparing with them, and I found that I was able to ease pain when I touched an area and concentrated.  Hopefully, I could use this to help Will.  It was the least I could do, considering he’d helped me pull myself back together, not to mention saving my life twice, the first time from Judiel's hold and the second from the Shade.

             
Will sighed in relief as I did that.  “Thanks.  Maybe now I can actually get some sleep.” he whispered, smiling softly as he closed his eyes.

             
Zane looked at me in surprise as he drifted off to sleep.  “I didn’t realize that you could ease pain as well.” he admitted.

             
“It was something I learned a while ago.  But I couldn’t just watch him suffer like this.” I replied.

             
Zane let out a long breath, putting his cheek against his hand.  “It’s odd for me though.  You actually have it in you to be forgiving towards him, and allow him not to suffer for what he did.  Saffron has been the same, although only with saving him and making sure that he’ll follow his orders.  You I could see.  But with him, the purpose still eludes me somewhat.  And that worries me.” he said quietly.

             
“It’s probably because of me.  He knew how hard it was for me to lose Chris already, and I certainly didn’t want to lose you and Will either.” I reasoned.