Remember Me (Men of Honor Series Book 1) (17 page)

***

Tess sat on the back porch with Mike and Emma. She’d gotten home late from San Diego. Mike was waxing his surfboard in the garage when she pulled up. He took one look at her swollen, red eyes, and whisked her to the back porch to talk. The iced coffee Emma made her sat on the small table between their chairs, the moon on the water giving a soft glow to the evening.

“You don’t have to talk about it tonight if you don’t want to, T.” Mike’s voice was soothing, gentle.

Emma put a hand on her arm. “Yeah. Whenever you’re ready, we’re here.”

“It’s okay.” Tess sniffed. Emma handed her a tissue. She blew her nose and tossed it with the others, a small teepee of them on the ground next to her chair.

“I went down to San Diego to see my family. I got to thinking about what Aimee said, that maybe I should at least give Ben a chance to explain. So I called and asked him to meet me at the pier where we used to hang out.”

She took a sip of her drink and continued.

“When I got there, I saw him talking to someone. Turns out it was this Sophia woman who was in the picture with him on his phone.”

“Maybe it was someone else,” Emma offered.

“No. It was her. They didn’t see me, but I was close enough to tell.”

“Tess, just because he was talking to her doesn’t mean there’s something between them.” Mike tried the voice of reason.

“I know. But he was holding her hand while they talked, and he looked…concerned. He cares about her.”

“You can care about someone without being in love with them though.” Emma tried to sound confident, but her attempt fell flat.

“Whose side are you on anyway?” As much as she loved Mike and Emma, their response wasn’t exactly helping. She wanted…no
needed
them to rant and rave and say what a jerk Ben was. Because he was. Wasn’t he? Her head spun.

“We’re on your side, of course,” Emma said.

“I think what Emma means, T, is that Ben told you Sophia was a friend. There could be a good explanation for what you saw.”

“Maybe.” Tess took another tissue from the box on the table and rubbed her eyes. Curse these tears. Would they ever end?

Mike’s phone rang in his house. He got up and went inside to answer it.

“Did you tell your parents about all this?” Emma asked.

“About seeing Ben with another woman?” That would be a huge mistake. Her dad was already poised to string Ben up by his thumbs. This would certainly send him over the edge.

“No, of course not. I meant did you tell them about all that’s happened these last few weeks? That Ben was back, his amnesia and stuff.”

Tess shook her head. “No. I thought about it but then we were hanging out, having a nice time. I didn’t want to worry them. And I wasn’t sure how things would end up with Ben. If we got back together, I could tell them then. But if we didn’t, there was no use in giving them all the gory details.”

She heard Mike’s voice. He had his back turned, as if to shield them from his conversation.

“And now I’m really glad I didn’t tell them. Ben is gone and with someone else. I need to continue moving forward just as I was before this whole ridiculous scenario crashed into my life.”

“You really believe that?”

“Believe what?”

Emma looked her in the eye. “You really believe he’s with someone else and out of your life for good?”

Tess took a deep breath. The tissue in her hand now a soggy ball.

“I don’t know. I honestly don’t know.” She shrugged. “What I do know is that I’m exhausted. I’m done riding this roller coaster. He’s in my life, he’s out, he’s in my life, he’s out. I can’t live like this, Em.”

“I know.” She patted Tess’s hand. “I know.”

***

Mike picked up his phone on the third ring.

“Mike! Hey, it’s Ben.”

“Uh, hey Ben.”

“I’ve been calling and calling Tess’s cell phone but she won’t pick up. Do you know where she is?”

“She’s on the back porch.”

“Great! Can I talk to her?” Ben paced the back of the boat, his excitement palpable.

“I’m not sure that’s such a good idea, Ben.”

Ben stopped short. “Why? What’s wrong?”

“Well, I guess I’ll just give you the short version. She said she asked you to meet her at the pier. When she got there, she saw you with this Sophia woman and you looked pretty chummy.”

Ben’s heart sank to his stomach. Impossible. Tess was there at the exact same time he was talking to Sophia? He couldn’t cut a break. There was no way Tess would let him try and talk his way out of this one. He sat down hard on the bench behind him and rubbed his beard.

“She’s pretty upset, dude. And I can’t say I blame her. You wanna let me in on what’s going on? Maybe I can help soften the blow, ya know?”

Ben blew out the breath he’d been holding. “I wish I could, man, but I can’t. All I can say is Sophia is truly just a friend. What Tess saw was a…misunderstanding. I don’t know what to do.”

“Misunderstanding or not, I suggest you give her some time. The past few weeks has been a whirlwind.”

“I know.”

“I know it has for you too. I will be praying the truth comes out for you two. I have a feeling it would free you both from all this pain.”

“Thanks, Mike. I hope so.” Ben laid his head against the back of the bench. “Keep an eye on her for me, okay? I promise I’ll clean up this mess soon.”

“You got it. Take care of yourself, Ben.”

“You too.”

Ben ended the call. Unbelievable. Tess had given him another shot, at least a cracked window of opportunity and he blew it. And without even knowing it. He threw the phone across the back of the boat. It banged against the hull and bounced to the ground. He had to get out of this once and for all.

***

Tess sat down at the nurses’ station and rubbed her eyes. Normally glad when a long work shift was almost over, tonight she dreaded going home. When she’d fallen into bed the night before, sleep had eluded her, thoughts of Ben and Sophia together constantly invading her vision. Tears welled up again, threatening to fall. She swiped at her eyes. No. No more.

“You okay, honey?”

So lost in her own thoughts, Tess hadn’t heard Gwen come up beside her.

“I’ll be fine.” She took the tissue Gwen offered and blew her nose.

“Hmmm. That implies you aren’t fine right now. You want to talk about it?”

“I don’t know. Talking about it only makes me cry more. And I’m done crying.” Tess tossed the wad of tissue into the wastebasket.

“Things not going so well with your lumberjack?”

“He’s not exactly
my
lumberjack anymore. I’m not sure he ever was.”

“Oh, he was, honey. He was.” She moved around the desk and grabbed a stack of files. “I saw the way he looked at you.”

Tess saw the way Ben looked at her too. And she missed it. Oh, how she missed it. But she also saw the way he looked at Sophia, and the memory caused her gut to coil.

“I’m not one to dole out advice all the time, Tess. But I’m going to give you some anyway. I was married for thirty-five years before my Jerry went to heaven, and let me tell you something. Forgiveness goes a long way.” She winked and walked down the hall.

Tess sighed. Gwen was right. Forgiveness does go a long way. But were any of Ben’s actions forgivable? She shook her head. Every thought intertwined with another inside her mind. Ben left before their wedding but never told her why. He said it wasn’t because of Sophia but didn’t explain where he went or why he left. He didn’t really explain anything that night Tess found the picture on his phone. He basically just asked him to trust that he loved her. But how could she do that?

“Hey, Tess.”

“Hi, Corey. What’s up?” Tess shooed away the thoughts that buzzed like flies around her head and focused on her coworker.

“My daughter is doing a fund-raiser for school selling chocolate bars. I’m trying to help her out a bit by seeing if anyone at work wants some. They’re two dollars each. You in?”

Tess thought of Corey’s cherub-faced kindergartener and smiled. “If there’s chocolate involved, you don’t have to ask me twice.”

She dug in her purse and found her wallet. Snagging two one-dollar bills from it, she passed them to Corey.

“Milk chocolate or dark?”

“Hmmm, decisions, decisions. I’ll take dark.”

“Sounds good.” Corey handed her the candy bar. “And thanks.”

“Anytime.”

Corey turned away and down the hall. Tess plopped the candy bar in her purse for later. As she went to fold up her wallet, the corner of Ben’s photograph stuck out. The one she took of him during the Habitat for Humanity project. His dimpled face smiled at her from the picture.

The truth was, Ben had explained nothing. Given her no reason to believe him or forgive him. Without a second thought, she crumpled the photo and tossed it in the trash on top of her wads of tear-filled tissues from the day.

It was time. Time to move forward. Time to stop thinking about Ben every waking moment and dreaming of him every night. That’s what her head said anyway. She hoped her heart would soon follow.

***

After much prodding from Gwen, Tess finally left work. Going home was unavoidable. Facing an empty house hadn’t bothered her before, but without Ben there, it was hollow. Lifeless.

She needed to stop this. Constant focus on Ben wasn’t going to help her get over him. Sleep deprivation wasn’t helping either. As she walked to her car, she dug for her keys. Dead on her feet, she prayed pure exhaustion would help her sleep.

The sun had set, causing the overhead lights in the parking lot to turn on. They always cast an eerie glow, motivating Tess to move as quickly as possible to her car. She reached the driver’s-side door and still hadn’t found her keys.

Ugh! She really needed a smaller purse. With one hand deep down in the pit of her bag, she tried to text Emma with the other. They had another dress fitting the next day and Tess had forgotten to tell Emma she had to work and would be late.

Her hand grasped the flip-flop keychain at the bottom of her purse.

“Aha! There you are.”

She pulled out her keys and clicked the unlock button. She hit send on her phone, her text successfully sent to Emma. As she opened the car door, large arms wrapped around her. A hand holding a cloth covered her face. Her phone dropped from her hand and her body slumped against a large chest. She blinked twice and the world went dark.

***

Tess tried to open her eyes. Each lid weighed a ton. A pain shot through her head from the base of her neck all the way to her eyes. Vibration beneath her told her she was in motion, but how? Forcing her eyes open, darkness lingered. The smell of rubber and metal filled her senses. Her shoulders ached. She tried to move her hands, only to discover they were tied behind her back.

She knew exactly where she was…in the trunk of a car. Her own car? She couldn’t think straight with the pain in her head. The memory of what had happened in the hospital parking lot rocked her awareness back to life. Someone had grabbed her from behind and knocked her out. How was that possible? She hadn’t heard anyone coming. They’d just appeared out of nowhere.

She tried to move her legs, but her ankles were bound. She wiggled and looked down. Duct tape. Her mouth was covered as well. Panic set in and her heart raced.

Think, Tess. Think. What would Ben tell you to do?

Stay calm. That’s what. She took in a few deep breaths, attempting to keep her breathing under control. The stench of rubber from the spare tire invaded her sinuses. The car hit a bump and her entire body bounced up and down, her hip landing on something hard. Tears formed in her eyes, but she blinked them away. Stay focused. Stay calm. That’s what Ben would say.

Ben
.

She looked around the trunk. Empty. Her attacker made sure nothing could be used as a weapon. Wrenching her shoulder, she patted the back pocket of her scrubs, hoping she’d put her phone in there. She hadn’t. It was all coming back to her now, like a fog lifting in her brain. She’d texted Emma, found her keys, then was attacked.

Dread pulsed through her veins.

Please God. Please help me.

Ben took a swig of his coffee and looked out the window. He was perched on a stool at the counter of the Old Town Café.

“You need a refill?”

“Sure. Thanks, Fran.” He set down his mug. Fran owned the café along with her husband, Gus. They’d pulled into San Diego in the early ’70s as a young couple in a VW bus, and never left. That same VW bus still sat out back. Gus worked on it in his spare time.

She poured fresh brew into his mug and smiled. “It’s a bit late for you to be having this much caffeine. You on duty tonight and need to stay awake?”

The café stayed open until eleven at night and opened at six every morning. Gus and Fran were like Energizer bunnies.

“Not this time.” He took a sip. The heat stung the back of his throat. Wanting to clear his head, he’d left the boat earlier and started walking. His stomach led him to Old Town, apparently knowing he needed to wallow in good food. Fran and Gus made the best in town.

“You seem like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders. You wanna talk about it?”

Ben shook his head. “Not tonight. Thanks though, Fran.”

Eating as many meals as he did in the café, it wasn’t a surprise Gus and Fran had become like an aunt and uncle to him. Any other day Ben would be up to spilling his guts to Fran, but not tonight. He was still processing all that had gone wrong. Trying to explain it to someone would only leave him drained and weary.

“Okay. But we’re here for ya if you need us.” She patted his arm and walked away.

A young couple came in and sat down in a booth. Holding hands across the table, they stared into each other’s eyes, oblivious to anyone around them. Fran took their order for hot fudge sundaes.

Ben stared into his coffee. Steam rose from the brown liquid.