Rising Up: Finding Me book 1 (3 page)

Looking around the room my eye catches on a note on the dresser.

Jake,

Goodbye you shit!!

Heidi

I drop the call without saying another word, stalking towards the wardrobe I pull the door open and all of her clothes are gone, and all of her make-up and shit has disappeared from the shelves in the bathroom.

The fucking bitch has left me.  How the hell did she manage it?  Well she's not getting away with it, she can cause a shit load of trouble, and my career is too damn important to me.  I rush to my computer and start it up.  Fuck, she's worked out my password!  All my private photographs and home videos are gone, she’s deleted the whole fucking lot of them.  My body goes cold when I realize she has probably copied them and falling back into my chair and stare around me, this could go very wrong if I don’t find her and stop her. 

First I call my friends, canceling tonight which includes my extremely ruthless lawyer and let him know what has happened.

Mason

I've had a weird feeling all day, I'm all twitchy and restless, and even after a punishing session at the gym and a five mile run, the anxious feeling is still there, it’s like I’ve forgotten something important.  I call my cousin Lake even though his apartment is just down the hall from mine.

He answers straight away.  "Hey dude, what's up?"

"I'm bored and going stir-crazy, and I want to go out for a beer, are you up for it?"  Maybe just getting out of here will do me good.  I’ve been wallowing in self-pity for long enough, it’s time to man up and get out again, plus my dick is sulking from the lack of action it’s had lately, maybe a quick fuck is needed, just not anything serious I’m not getting suckered into that trap again.

"Shit Mason, really?  You've finally got over that bitch Lauren, thank fuck for that."  I hear my cousin blow out a deep breath.

"Don't start Lake, I'm not gonna talk or think about her anymore."  A sick feeling builds up as I get angry at her again, but shake it off, it’s been nearly six weeks and I’m pissed off and bored.

"Well thank God for that.  Gimme ten minutes to shower and change and I'll be with you.  Have you called Lucas?"

Lucas is Lake’s brother, and runs a security and surveillance company, so spends a lot of time away.

"Nah. He's still out of town, it's just us."

I've already showered so I can just throw on a clean T-shirt, and scrubbing my hands through my hair, I'm ready to go.  I've never bothered too much about my appearance but standing at 6’5” and being pretty fit from the gym, and running every day, seems to work, and girls have always come on to me, so I must have something going for me, but Lauren managed to knock all my confidence away, it’s time to see if I’ve still got what it takes.

Standing at the bar watching a baseball game on the big flat-screen across from me when I feel a shift in the air, and as I look around I notice two girls walk in, and  just like that, the twitchy feeling in my gut is back and a shiver runs down my spine,

I nudge Lake.  "Look at those two that have just walked in, I've not seen them here before." 

"Shit they're fucking hot!  I want the tiny blonde one, you can have the other." He starts checking his hair and shit in the mirror behind the bar.

I watch them look around taking it all in, yep they're definitely new here.  I look the tall redhead up and down and feel my dick twitch in my pants, and that's something it hasn't done since I kicked Lauren to the curb.  I look at her wondering what it is about her that has me getting hard. 

She's tall, probably about 5'10, which is a plus for me, and thin but not too skinny, and has what looks like a great pair of tits under her loose top, but it's the soft smile on her face and the sparkle of her bright emerald green eyes that has me staring.

Luckily she hasn't noticed me checking her out.  I've never been a fan of redheads before but her hair is a stunning color, it looks like the leaves in autumn, and hangs like a waterfall in soft waves down to the middle of her back. Shit I sound like a complete fucking pussy!  Rein it in Mason.

They find a table and order a couple of beers and start looking round the room, her eyes focus on us, and I can’t tear my eyes away from hers as I smile languidly, she whips her head back to her friend who also turns to look.

"I think we're on mate."  Lake taps my arm and we start to walk through the crowd to get to them, just as we reach their table the blonde laughs and chokes on her beer and the other laughs hard, fuck me that laugh has me trapped.  When we reach them, Lake smiles, "Hey ladies, can we join you?" His eyes run over the little blonde and pulls out a seat before they even answer.

"Um, well it looks like you already have, but sure take a seat." Blondie says.

"Thanks, I'm Lake and this is my cousin Mason, we haven't seen you here before, are you new?"

The redhead looks at us but doesn't speak, I can see the remains of a blush fade from her face, but when I keep my gaze on her it starts to spread again.  "Hi, are you sure you don't mind?"  She doesn't look too happy to me, but she smiles and nods but a frown appears on her face.

"Hi, I'm Maddie and this is my friend Ginny.  We've just moved here today." Blondie speaks

"That's not an American accent where have you moved from?"  I ask.

"We're from England."  Ginny answers hesitantly, her voice is quiet and low but sweet, and sends another message straight to my dick, but by the look on her face I can see that she really is not happy about us being here, but her friend is already talking a mile a minute to Lake.

"Can I get you another drink?" I can't stop staring at her, she's fucking stunning and my heart is going crazy in my chest.  The restless feeling is back in my stomach and I think it has something to do with this gorgeous redhead. 

I've got the strangest feeling building up in me, I want to scoop her up and run off with her.  What the fuck is going on!

"Um, okay I'm not much of a beer drinker..."

Her friend interrupts her "No, we normally drink wine or margaritas."

"How about a margarita then?  I believe they make a mean one here."  I'm talking directly to her and she nods back.

"Okay then, yes please."  This time she looks straight at me, her vibrant emerald green eyes shining and I know I'm a goner.

"So are you just on holiday?"  I actually think I stuttered, and I’ve had to shift my hands to stop them from reaching out to touch her, any part of her.

"No, we're going to be working here for a year. I'm really excited, Maddie and I have always talked about working abroad, so when the opportunity arose we jumped straight in." 

Her voice stays soft and low and is making me feel like a schoolboy as I need to adjust my dick in my jeans.  I look over to Lake and he's laughing at something Maddie has said, and when I catch his eye he raises one eyebrow and smirks at me, so it seems he's onto a winner with her, the poor girl.

Time passes quickly, but I realize that it’s me that’s doing most of the talking, and she hasn’t given me much information about herself, but regardless of her shyness, I am so drawn to her that I’m finding it difficult to concentrate.

Ginny says something and I turn back.  "Sorry, I didn't catch that."

"Yeah, I noticed you were staring at your friend, are you trying to get his attention?  You don't need to keep us company, y'know."  She looks at me warily as if she’s fighting an inner conflict, which is exactly what I’m doing to keep myself from touching her.

"So you don't want us here?" I smile at her laying on the charm hoping she'll give in and carry on talking to me, but she doesn't.  "Well it was nice meeting you, maybe we'll see you around?  C'mon Lake let's leave these ladies alone."  I give Ginny one more look and see her apologetic smile, and I again have to fight the urge to sweep her off her feet and keep her to myself.

Lake gives Maddie a kiss on her cheek and hands her his cell number. "Give me a call sometime soon and we can meet up."

Imogen

"What the fuck, Ginny.  Why did you say for them to leave?"

I can see that Maddie is cross with me. "I just didn't think it was a good idea, you know what you're like, you would have ended going back to his place, and then you'd be pissed off when he never called you again.  You don't have to get off with the first guy you meet." 

I shake my head using that excuse rather than admit that I was drawn to Mason like a moth to a flame.  There is something about him that I don’t understand, I don’t get it, I wanted to touch him and to let him touch me and that is not something I ever thought I’d feel again.

"For God's sake you're not my mother, and if I want to shag every guy in this bar then I will, so get off my case and lighten up a bit.  Not every man you meet is going to be a shit. I'm going to pee so get the drinks in and sort your head out.  I'm not going to do anything to jeopardize our time here, so just relax." 

I watch her stomp off and feel guilty that my fears and insecurities are interrupting with her life.

I've got a funny feeling in my stomach, and I feel all tingly like I’ve forgotten or lost something important, maybe it's just the jetlag setting in.  I sit there and stewing on her words and realize that she's right, and I'm being silly, this is a new start and I should be grateful that I'm away from Jake and my mother. 

The waitress brings our drinks over and smiles at me, "If it means anything to you I think you did the right thing there, those guys, well the blond one for sure, are real players, your friend would have ended up another notch in his bedpost."

"Thanks for that, I'm Imogen, and as you can tell, we're new here so I'm sure we were just fresh meat to them."

"It's nice to meet you.  I'm Tammy, well it’s Tamsin but everyone calls me Tammy.  Let me know if you need anything, I'm here most days."  Smiling again she walks away.

Maddie comes back and we both start to speak.  "I'm sorry Mads, I promise not to be a killjoy anymore, and if you want to hook up with someone then who am I to stop you."

"I'm sorry too, I wasn't thinking, I just got caught up in the moment, and shit Ginny, he was a fine specimen, so was the guy you were talking to, Lake said they live round here  maybe we'll see them here again."

"I'm sure we will, it is our local now too."  

The rest of the evening goes quickly, and even though we are approached by quite a few more men, we don't encourage them to sit with us, and they soon move off.  As we get up and start to leave, I get the tingling feeling down my spine, this time I turn to look, and see Mason watching me, his amazing blue eyes darken when I look at him, he smiles and mouths "goodnight" to me.  I feel the blush spread up over my face and return his goodbye, he swallows hard and smiles.  I'm finding it very difficult to turn away.

"Come on Ginny, let's go." Maddie grabs my arm and pulls me along, but not before I see that Lake has some girl draped over him with his tongue down her throat.  Maddie must have seen that and it's pissed her off, just proving to me that he is indeed a player.

When we get back home, Maddie seems to have shaken her bad mood off and we open a bottle of wine, and turn the music up loud, and Tom Odell is singing his heart out about another love, but after finishing the bottle we head off to our beds. 

I'm lying stretched out in probably the largest and most comfortable bed I've ever slept in.  I realize I haven't checked my phone all night, and really wish I'd kept it that way when I saw how many text messages and voice mails I had from my mother and Jake, and none of them are pleasant, so I delete the lot and vow to myself not to give in to them, and chuck my phone into the corner of the room. 

Tomorrow I will buy a new phone then they won't be able to reach me, I don't even know why I kept this one with me. 

As I lie down my head is suddenly filled with thoughts of Mason, he really is possibly the best looking man I have ever seen.  His dark almost black hair, and it’s longer than I usually like, but it looked like he'd just got out of bed and ran his hands through it, I always think of it as 'good sex hair', all scruffy and messed up, I wanted to run my hands through it and pull hard, his eyes are the brightest cerulean blue I've ever seen, like a tropical lagoon sort of blue.

But it was when he started to speak, and his deep voice was dark brown like melted chocolate and as smooth as soft velvet.  I hope he didn't notice the goose bumps that ran over my body.  That has never happened to me before, such an instant attraction, which is why I didn't want them to stay with us, I knew I wouldn't be able to control myself with him. 

Jake had always fancied himself more than me and didn't care how I felt, sex was for his self-gratification never for mine, and after everything he did to me I never thought I'd want to be with another man again, but Mason sure looked like he knew how to make a girl feel good.  Sighing, I turn over and try to get to sleep.

*

My bruises have faded now, and my ribs are definitely less painful, but my mind keeps drifting back to my last night with him.  I’ve had some flash backs of what happened, and after finding it all on his computer I’m glad I can’t remember most of it. 

The brutality from seemingly intelligent and respectable men astounded me, and I don’t ever want to watch or see any of those images again, and now as I heal physically my mind is clearer and stronger too. 

Nessa sent a colleague of hers to help me through the hard days after the rape, and by talking to her every day, sometimes for hours on end, I have tried to close the door on the whole event and not to let it encroach on my new life, and now that I am here I can breathe again, and not feel that I need to keep looking over my shoulder.  Nobody here knows me, and nobody at home knows where I am, not even Nessa.  It’s safer this way.

We spend the next day shopping for new clothes, and although I brought most of mine here, I’m choosing to replace them and continue the reinvention of myself and my life. 

“Hey Imogen, do you think I should call Lake, the guy from the bar?”  Maddie turns to me, her eyes pleading with me.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit too soon?  You don’t want to give them the wrong impression of us.”  My body is screaming at me to let her call, but my brain is reining me in because damn, I want to see Mason again.