Rising Up: Finding Me book 1

By

 

JJ Harper

 

 

©Copyright 2015 JJ Harper

 

 

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing.

 

This is a work of fiction.  Names, characters, places or incidents are the product of the author’s imagination and are used factiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons living or dead, events or locals are entirely coincidental.

 

The author acknowledges the trademark status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission.  The publication/ Use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owner.

 

All rights reserved.

 

 

Dedication

 

This is for my husband Paul, what started as a passing comment

Has turned into a lot of hard work and missed meals

But I would never have tried without his encouragement, his love and sometimes his pushiness! I love you.

So thank you, thank you, thank you

xxxx

 

 

“Your life doesn’t get better by chance but by change.” Jim Rohn

 

Before Imogen

SMACK!

I fall to the floor and curl my arms over my head, which unfortunately gives him a shot at my ribs. The first kick hits my stomach, and the second to my ribs.

“What have I fucking told you?  You are not to go out without me and never with that bitch friend of yours!”  He nudges my head with his foot right on the spot he punched me, I can feel the skin is split and the blood is dripping down to my eye.  Luckily, if you can say anything about this is lucky, my eye has already swollen and shut. I start to stand up when he pulls my arm to get me on my feet.

“Don't fucking touch me, you sick fuck!  I hate you!” I know the tears are spilling down my face mingling with the blood.

“You don't help yourself by going behind my back. What were you thinking going out with Mel?  You know I don't like you seeing her, she just causes trouble.  All this could have been avoided if you would just do as you are fucking told.  What has she been saying?  I can tell you're hiding something from me.”

It didn't take him long to start getting angry and wound up again, this was not going to end well for me. It never did.   “It was just a couple of drinks, I sent you a text to tell you where I was, and I haven't seen her for ages.”

There’s no way on god’s earth, I was telling him that everything we were doing to get me out of here, and away from him, is finally coming together.

He pulls my hair back and drags me towards the bedroom, my scalp is screaming as I can feel him pulling my hair out, when he lets go I fall to the floor and curl up in a ball, as another kick hits my ribs, I don’t think I can take much more of this.

“Get up Heidi, get on your knees, or am I going to have to teach you yet another lesson, why do you keep making me do this?  You are not allowed to be anywhere near her again.  There is no way you are going anywhere with her.  You work at my offices for one reason and one reason only, and that's so I can keep a fucking eye on you.” 

Panting hard now and spitting his words out, he opens his fly and is rubbing his cock hard, I think I'm going to be sick as he forces my mouth open with his thumbs and jams his hardness into my mouth, I gag and can't breathe as he reaches the back of my throat.  He won't stop battering my mouth and throat I can feel him getting harder, and he's grunting foul words and still tugging hard on my hair leaving my scalp bruised and bleeding, where my hair has been torn out, but soon he's pouring his foul release down my throat.

“Look at you, you swallow it all like the slut you are!!  I'm going out now so clean yourself up, I don't want to look at you looking like this, you look like the whore I knew you were. I'll be back later and I'll probably bring the guys with me.”  Pushing me hard backwards off of my knees, and he's gone walking away without a backward glance.

As I crawl my way to the bathroom, I can feel the vomit rising in my throat, and only just make it to the toilet. I never know what he's up to with his friends but I know it will be no good, it never is.

Looking at myself in the mirror and trying to clean my broken skin, I realize that I no longer recognize myself.  What happened to me, when did I become this battered and bruised wreck?

Waking up the next morning my head is pounding, and I don't seem to be able to open my eyes properly, they feel like they have been glued shut, I manage to get one to open and look around.  My body is covered in bruises and bite marks and there is blood everywhere.  My long dark red hair is stiff and matted with heaven knows what.  What the hell happened to me?  Reaching for my phone I call Vanessa I know she is going to go mental at me this time.

"Nessa, it’s me Heidi," I try and clear my throat but it hurts too much to swallow.  "Ness, can you come and help me please?  Something’s happened and I hurt, I hurt so much."  Tears start flowing.

"Okay sweetie, stay still and don't move.  I'm on my way."  It seems to take forever for her to arrive.

I've managed to drag myself to the door to buzz her in, but the look on face says it all.  "Come on I've got the car downstairs, let’s get you fixed up.  But seriously Heidi this has got to stop."

We make our way to her private practice and now I’m wearing a hospital gown and sit in her consultation room, surrounded by swabs and gauze and bandages, as she attempts to clean and patch up my broken and battered skin. 

"He must have drugged me, I remember some of it.  I'd been with Mel and he found out and slapped me about a bit but brought his friends over later, and I think Jake gave me a glass of wine and then I felt a bit strange and then they stripped my clothes off me and threw me on the bed.  I don't remember anything else.”

"Okay Heidi, I'm going to have to give you a local anaesthetic.  He's torn you up inside and it will need a few stitches.  It looks like your back passage is torn too.  I'll sort it out, but I'm not going to do this again. 

You need to disappear.  I mean it, change your name and move away, very far away, anything anywhere, just do something, I'll help you find a way, I love you girl but I won’t do this again without involving the authorities."

I hug my friend as tight as I can with my bruised and broken ribs, we are both crying.  "I’m trying to I promise, I don't know what I would do without you, thank you for this, for all the others and this is, I promise the last time you will have to do this for me.  I love you too Vanessa." 

"You can thank me by changing your life.  I need to photograph these wounds Heidi, and I'll write up the report, and maybe one day you'll find the strength to report him.I love you sweetie, but he's going to kill you one of these days.  And I can't bear the thought of losing you.”

Her eyes look dark and haunted and pretty much a reflection of mine.

Another thirty minutes and we are done, and I fill her in on the progress of my forthcoming escape. 

“We have found jobs for us both at a very fast moving and vibrant law firm, that is why I met Melanie yesterday, I had received the email confirming our positions.  Our name changes have already taken place and all we have to wait on now is our passports and driving licenses, and we will be gone Nessa, I promise you I will never let him touch me again.

Mel is sat in her car waiting for us, and jumps out and rushes up as soon as Nessa has helped me out.  “Shit Heidi, he’s really done it this time.  C’mon let’s go and grab your stuff and get you out of here.”  Her striking dark blue eyes roam over me in horror and I shuffle towards the apartment doors.  “It’s okay Heidi we will get everything together for you.  Are you sure he won’t be home soon?”

“No, its fine, he’s shooting a new promo video for his latest show.”  Opening up the door I find it hard to take a single step inside, but Mel moves in first and takes my hand.

“It’s going to be okay Heidi, I promise you, we will be gone and he won’t find us. Look I’m going to grab your clothes.”

“No wait!!  I don’t want you to see the bedroom it’s not a pretty site in there.”  I panic at the thought of her picturing what went on in there.

“It won’t bother me, I just want to get you out of here quickly.”  Reaching across for my hand we walk towards it together, and as I pass the table in the dining area, my phone rings and I jump about a mile in the air, as the ringtone allocated to Jake rings loud in the quiet space.

“Hi Honey, are you okay?”  I’m cringing as I say the words and Melanie and Nessa carry on down towards the master bedroom.

“I’m fine Heidi, why shouldn’t I be?  Where the fuck have you been this morning?  Anyway I don’t have time to pass pleasantries with you, I’m just letting you know that I am going away today, the video has been put on hold while I cover for Tom Pearce on ‘Good Morning Britain’ for a couple of weeks maybe even three, this is great timing for me and the extra exposure will be a perfect run-up for my show. Stefan will be over to collect my clothes, he’s got a key, and so make sure you stay out of his way. 

Any way I don’t know I’m telling you any of this. 

Just stay out of the office this week, I’m sure you are feeling tired this morning.”  I can’t believe he just thinks I’ll only be tired today.  My thoughts are interrupted by him shouting at me.  “Heidi, are you even listening to me!”

“Of course I am, my love.”  My sugar sweet voice sticks in my throat.

“Good, so as I was saying, keep away from Melanie while I’m gone, and I’ll know if you disobey me.  I fucking mean it Heidi. Stay. The. Fuck. Away!”  The line goes dead and I know how it feels.

The first week goes slowly as I begin to recover and heal, I’ve been sleeping in the spare bedroom, I can’t bring myself to go back into his room, I haven’t even cleaned up in there, and I’m sure as hell not changing the linen on the bed, just the thought of touching it makes me sick.  I manage to keep Mel away from the apartment, but still talk to her constantly as my desperation to leave builds.

It’s been hard to keep still and let my bones knit together and mend, and at the near two week mark I’m panicking that he’ll be back soon and have me on lockdown.

“Shit Mel I’m ready to go, how much longer do you think it will be?”

“Days Sweetie, I’m sure it will be just days now.  Mine came yesterday so it will be soon.”  Her voice is reassuring but I can hear the excitement there too.  She wants to get away nearly as much as I do.

“I’m sure you’re right, but it’s only a few more days before he comes home, and we really need to be gone by then.” 

“We will do this Heidi, even if you have to hide out here for a couple of days while our flights get organized.  The money is in my account from the law firm, so we can book as soon as the documents hit our floor.”

Just then the doorbell buzzes and my heart leaps to my throat.  “Shit, hang on Mel there’s someone at the door, stay on the line I’ll be two secs.”  I drop the phone down on the table in the hall and answer the intercom, a voice comes through the speaker, “There’s a postman here with a letter that needs your signature Ms. Reid can I send him up to you?”

Stuttering out my affirmative, I pick up the phone again, “Mel, it’s the postie with a letter I’d better go, I‘ll call you back.”  By the time I end the call I hear a knock and run up to open it.  Minutes later I have two official envelopes in my hand, one from the DVLA with my new driving license and the second from The Passport Office with my new identity.

When I pick up my phone again and call her, a smile so large has spread over my face, and I can hear it in my voice when I speak.  “It’s them Melanie or should I say Madeleine?”  A laugh bursts from me that I never thought I would hear again in this place, and tears burst from my eyes.

“I’m on the BA website now and they have flights available in two days, are you ready to do this?” 

Her laughter just fuels my own. “Hell yes!  Press the buy button right now.”  But when she ends the call I have to sit down and hold myself together, because to save myself I have to say goodbye to Heidi which is hard as I know I’ve let her down.  It’s time to move on.  I need to be a stronger woman one that I am proud of, one that Heidi would be proud of.

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