Authors: DeLaine Roberts
“Alex, have you made any plans for work here in Chicago?”
“Drew has made arrangements for me to continue with PMC and work remotely with Jennifer Riley, an assistant working the clinical side in my territory. We were doing that while I was undergoing rehabilitation/physical therapy and it worked quite well, so they have converted it to a beta program. I don’t know how long we will continue, PMC has been overwhelmingly patient while I have been recovering.”
“Are you finished with Physical Therapy or will you need to continue here?”
“Yes, I am going to continue working with a therapy/personal trainer to get my strength built back up. I still have slight weakness in my right leg and foot, which causes me to continue to stumble if I’m not careful. Cooper says that I
watch my toes grow
...when I run.” as we both began to chuckle.
“Not to get into your personal space, but the reason I ask is that I have full access to the gym and private lap pool in this building, and there are excellent personal trainers if you would like contact information. If you are going to stay for any length of time and want your own space, I have another condo leased in the building for corporate guests. You are free to use it. I will give your information to Vinnie, so that he will be aware that you may want to use it. It comes with full housekeeping services and full chef services. You would be close to your old stomping grounds...just give it some thought."
“Stomping grounds?” I knew what he meant, but I had to ask him, just to tease him.
“Yes, you know I am talking about the coffee shop!”
“Of course, but this time, I won’t be making your coffee!”
“No, you can enjoy a cup with me and maybe this time, you will actually pay attention to me!”
Oh, so there is interest after all in what I pay attention to, aha, Mr. Brooks, I got your message loud and clear!
We spent the rest of the evening exchanging funny barbs back and forth and I could tell that he really is a guy’s guy, sports, pool tables, beer kegs...almost a frat style aura about him. Personality wise, he is quite different and less uptight than Grayson. Their dress code is the same, same jeans, same shirts, and familiar shoes even. Outwardly, they are identical but that is where it stops.
“Why did you not go the ARMY route like your Dad?” I wanted to know what made them take different paths.
“It really wasn’t for me. I believe in cowboys and Indians, so I get it. But at the time, I was more interested in liberal arts. I also had a vision problem, which kept me from shooting straight.” We both fell in laughter.
“And here I put my life in your hands only to find out your blind?” Still laughing!
“No, I have since had that corrected, but it was a great excuse for not joining. It just wasn’t me. That is where Grayson and I differ. You may have figured out by now that on the outside, we are identical. Even our parents couldn’t tell us apart. However, on the inside we are completely unrelated.” He was staring at me at this point, his gaze almost contrite.
“Harrison, I am not looking for comparisons between you two in a romantic way. Likewise, I don’t want to be the object in your competition. But I do want to get to know you and I am interested in what makes Harrison tick. You are Grayson’s brother, his family. I love Grayson, no doubt, but that doesn’t mean that we may make it as a couple. That is why I came here to get away, have some time to think and finish my recovery. As you heard my call with Cooper, I sent Grayson home, he has things he must deal with and I have to deal with what I can from my end. If being a friend to me is too close for comfort, I can appreciate keeping a distance.”
Thinking out his next play, “Alex, I need a beer bud. You know the one where I yell, hey bro, bring me another beer while we watch the game. Nothing more, nothing complicated. If you can hang out, I can too. I travel often, so it will be hit and miss whether I am here or not. Which is why I think that I haven't managed to score the best love of my life?”
“Has the best one gotten away?”
“Well, there was someone very special to me years ago, but she couldn’t handle my global travel and that made for constant friction between us. Sometimes, a clingy relationship is overrated.”
“I am certainly not one to give advice. The closest person to me is Coop and he is like the brother I never had, we have been friends all of our life.”
“Never lovers?”
Coughing, choking on my wine, thinking that he knew...“Oh, gosh no. Cooper is gay!” And we both shared a laugh. I seriously thought he must have known that.
“I used to see him come into the coffee shop, but I thought he was flirting with you. I couldn’t tell how far your relationship was. Then at the hospital, the way he cared for you, I thought he might be in love with you. But you weren’t with him, you were with Grayson. Alexandra, just so you know, it is obvious to everyone that you are in love with Grayson.”
“Yes, I love him, but I am not ready to talk about that. I hope you understand. And being here with you doesn’t mean I am looking for a replacement.”
“Yes ma’am, now I have been told...loud and clear!” I could see that there was an edge to him. Was it because I expressed my love for Grayson or did he have a secret agenda to compete with Grayson and get in the middle of what was going down between us? I decided to go for the golden question, “Harrison, have you and Grayson always competed for the same girl?” Coughing, you would’ve thought I hit him in the head with a brick. He stood up so quickly I wasn’t expecting it. Walking over to the edge of the patio, he turned to me and I could see the pain in his eyes. “I loved Olivia first, but she had a salacious sexual desire, twisted by some accounts. She wanted the settled home-life that a surgeon could give her. We had dated for some time, when she met Grayson while he was in town. I never thought he would steal her away from me! It rocked my world when she abruptly left town and moved to be with him. It ruined my relationship with him.”
I had to know if he was seeing her again, I had to know his involvement with her. Taking a gamble, “Harrison, were you the father of her baby?”
“How did you know about the pregnancy? No, I didn’t even know she was pregnant until she called me after the miscarriage, but I believe that she told Grayson she wasn’t pregnant. She realized she would never have him again. I haven’t seen her since their engagement party a year ago. Once she started seeing Grayson, I stopped any interaction with her or him for that matter. She had an insatiable sexual appetite and her cheating on him didn’t come as a surprise while he was in the Army. She couldn’t handle being alone. Alex, I am not comfortable talking about Olivia. I am sorry, but you and I both have suffered at the hands of her. You can obviously see my distaste for her. She has hurt many people along the way, she is a relationship piranha.”
So, she really was pregnant, but she miscarried. I wonder if she told Grayson that. Was he the father?
“I agree. Actually, I think that I should be making my way home. I am just going to call a cab and get on home. I have a big day tomorrow arranging for the courier to pick up all my things in Dallas.”
“Alex, I have a spare car in the garage, it is my corporate car, and you are free to use it. When we get downstairs, I will introduce you to Vinnie if he is in, he will get you keys and you can come and go as you please.”
As we made our way downstairs, I could see the role that Harrison was taking with me, more of the big-brother role. He wasn’t trying to make moves on me; he was respecting my relationship with Grayson. He knew that I had been hurt by the Olivia and Grayson debacle. From his own experience, he knew the pain that I would have to sort through. I appreciate him making the offer of the car and the apartment for loan, it was a generous offer and one that made sense for me to take.
“Harrison, thank you for offering your apartment and your car. It will be of great help to me, but I am kind of stubborn in the handout department. I would like to pay you rent, if that is okay with you?”
“Alex, it is a corporate car and apartment. If we go the rent route, it screws up the accounting, so for once, take the handout!” Offering his hand, he gave me a big hug and helped me get into the car. I could tell that it gave him great joy to feel like he was helping me out. I am sure that he probably had already run the idea past Dad and got his blessing, otherwise he wouldn’t have known about my issue with handouts. As I drove Harrison’s Lexus 450 back home, my mind drifted, comparing the Brooks brothers and I could feel the tension welling up in me. It was the first time since Harrison had picked me up off the sidewalk that I had thought that deep about Grayson. The evolution of the story continues...evil plastic bitch Olivia Balcone, the root of all that is evil. She apparently has hurt both of them very much.
Chapter 8
Coop would be able to help me put some perspective on all of this. We hadn’t actually had the opportunity to catch up or dissect everything that has occurred. I sent him a text, but he didn’t respond. He must be on a plane or busy at the moment.
I miss Coop, I miss our daily exchange and him putting me in my place in that enjoyable way of his, and I miss his brutal honesty. I can always count on him to tell me what I NEED to hear, not what I WANT to hear. Our problem is going to be that he has faith in Grayson, and I don’t. Grayson is as guilty as I am in the running department, but I do have to give him credit for coming after me post-gala and then flying to Chicago, which is more than I expected. When he left, he left without telling me how he felt about me. He told me what happened, but he didn’t say he loved me, I think that stung the most. He shuts me out of his thoughts, keeps me at arm’s length when it comes to emotions. It’s amazing how I can feel so close to him when we are dancing, but the minute I want to know how he feels about me, I feel further away from him.
Walking into my dad’s house, I found that he and Gretchen had just returned home from a social event. Calling out to me from the den, “Alexandra, did you enjoy the game with Harrison?” He asked with a little chuckle in his voice, so I walked in to visit with them. “Yes, Dad, we had a great time, but we are just becoming friends, nothing more. By the way, I understand from Harrison that you are friends from several years back. You must respect him and his business dealings?”
“Alexandra, Harrison is a savvy business developer and attorney. He makes his mind up quick in business and goes after it, making good choices and uses ethics, we don’t see very often. However, when it comes to women, he is quite the prowess and very experienced in that department. Please be aware, he isn’t the right relationship for you, not that his brother seems to be any better these days!” By now, he is standing with his hands on his hips, speaking to me in that fatherly, authoritative voice.
“Daddy, the Brooks brothers are off limits to me. I have no desire for a further entanglement with either of them at this point. I sent Grayson home and although he and I have much to discuss, I am not ready to get into that. Harrison on the other hand, wants to be the big brother to me. He offered to loan me his car and his corporate apartment at the Millennium so that I can use the facilities and the trainers. Would you have an issue if I stayed over there, especially since you and Gretchen will be leaving town?”
“Alexandra, I would be happy that you’re there and Harrison would be looking after you. I have quite a few tense business dealings going on right now and he, or his team, would be around to keep you safe. We spoke about it this morning. It makes better sense and I feel that you would be more comfortable, I know I would, since Gretchen and I will be on our fall cruise starting next weekend, but only if you are okay for us to leave town?”
“Sure, Dad, that will be great. His building seems very secure. By the way, care to fill me in on these tense business dealings? Something I should be concerned about?”
“Just normal business darling, you know how it is. I am an old man, so many vultures out there thinking they can take over or try to undermine a steal of my business. However, my mind is still sharp, I am on to them. I just want to know that you will have someone with you to see about you.”
“I will Daddy, you and Gretchen just have a great time.” I ran to Daddy to give him a hug and encourage him and Gretchen to take the trip, “Daddy, don’t let me stop you from taking the trip. I will be fine, I promise. No more drama from me, you have my word! Take the trip and I will stay over in town! I love you, Dad.” Holding me close, closer than I have felt with my dad in years, I felt my eyes well up with tears and I could see the comfort in Gretchen’s eyes. I hugged them both and thanked them for their hospitality and we agreed to spend some time together before they left for their annual month-long cruise to the Caribbean.
Phone ringing, I excused myself and made my way to my room to chat with Cooper. “Coop, I miss you! I am so glad you called, how are you?”
“Alex, I miss you, but I am glad to hear from you. I’ve been pacing the floor wandering how you were and what was going on. So I finally was able to catch up with Doc and he filled me in on his part. I have been with him for several hours. He’s beside himself. Why did you send him packing? You know you love him and you have to work this out, Alex! He says that you were there with Harrison. Care to tell me how in the hell that all stacks up?”
“It is totally innocent, I swear. I bumped into him at the coffee shop. He extended the big brother routine and invited me to dinner. Just as I was getting ready to leave, Grayson shows up. I thought it was Harrison, then Harrison arrives, what a tricked up web they weave. I don’t think that will be happening again, since I can now tell them apart. Grayson gave me his spiel and to be honest, I feel horrible for him and it will be hard for him to go through alone, but I can’t fix what ails him. The
plastic bitch Olivia
should have her head on a silver platter. I am just not ready to go through all of that with him, he needs to process it himself before we can think of anything else. He has to move on from her and I don’t think he really has. His secrecy is something I’m having trouble getting past and then, he left me hanging after we made love. You know what that weekend was like for me, but I don’t want to talk about that. I get what happened at the Gala, that wasn’t his fault.”
“So I am curious, Alex, how does Harrison fit into this triangle?”
“He dated Olivia and introduced her to Grayson, who then stole her away. Harrison said she had an insatiable sexual appetite, wasn’t surprised when she cheated on Grayson. He isn’t interested in a relationship with anyone. His preference is more like one-night stands. We went to the game and had dinner at his place, watching the post game commentary. He offered to loan me his corporate car and corporate apartment at the Millennium so that I would be close to town and also have training facilities with trainers for rehab. Plus, Dad and Gretchen are leaving for their vacation next weekend and didn’t want me to be at the house alone. He and Dad are personal friends from years ago, so his intention is strictly like a big brother.”
“Do you feel that you will ever come back to Dallas, Alex? I know it is a hard question, but I think you are going to have to address it, not run from it!” I could feel the disappointment in his voice and I hadn’t even given him an answer yet.
“I can’t answer that right now Coop except to say that I am not ready to come back just yet. Drew has it worked out for me to be here for at least three more weeks, and then I will need to make a decision about my position in Dallas. Things have been going great with the assistant working the backside of things, but I know eventually I will have to make a decision. I am just not ready to work with him every day, Coop!”
“Alex, you wouldn’t be working with him every day. Look, there are tons of hospitals and surgeons that need your equipment. So what if he signed on to do speaking for your company and perform beta testing? That doesn’t mean that you will see him. Besides, don’t you get the same feeling when you are with his twin?” I could hear the unspoken argument that Cooper was trying to convey, that somehow being with Grayson’s twin was giving me the same feelings that I had for Grayson.
“Coop, not to spoil your debate, but it is totally not the same. Believe it or not, I can now tell them apart, not physically, but when they talk, when they smile. I can tell them apart and they could not act more opposite! Believe me; I had to find a way to distinguish them. I love you for trying to take care of me. I know that this is as hard for you as it is for me.”
“Alright, get some sleep and I will talk with you tomorrow, but if you need me?”
“I know, you’ll be right here, I got it. Say hello to Mark for me. You are still seeing him, right?”
“Alex that is another story for another time. Just be well and call me tomorrow. Hugs!”
I put my ear buds in and started making a new playlist listening to
You Give Me Something by James Morrison
, riveted my thoughts about Grayson. Yes, he gives me something alright, but is it enough? Some of the song’s lyrics hit so close to home it scares me:
You want to stay with me in the morning
You only hold me when I sleep
I was meant to tread the water
Now I've gotten in too deep
For every piece of me that wants you
Another piece backs away
I am not sure that I'm willing to give it any more time and continue the pain of something that can’t possibly work. So once again, I cry myself to sleep.
Working remotely from Chicago was a bit tougher than I had imagined. There were more hours spent on the phone than what I had initially anticipated. It made me appreciate the downtime I would have with my physical training. I would be training in the later afternoons, early evenings, so that I miss the traffic and can get my assignments done in the morning. The training team was very willing to continue the plan that the Dallas folks had started, with weights, running and swimming. I would have a full, varying workout every day.
After my workout, I ventured over to the coffee shop to get one of their green-teas, just a comforting place for me to be. I enjoyed being back.
I so enjoyed my week with Dad and Gretchen, never having had much time with them. I suppose I see them from an adult’s eyes, rather than a withdrawn teenager, who has never surpassed grieving for the loss of a mother. I will never get over losing my mom; I miss her terribly every day. I know if she were here, she would have just the right things to say to me and she would remind me, that the heartbeat has two sides to it.
As I said good-bye to Dad and Gretchen, I realized that I had now made it a week without any interruptions from the Brooks brothers. Admittedly, although I missed Grayson terribly, I wasn’t missing his drama at the moment, and to be honest, he deserved some downtime to fine tune his feelings. If he had any real ones for me, they would be there when the right time came. If the right time never presented, then it meant that we were in the past and didn’t have a future.
Arriving at the Millennium, I saw a familiar face. “Hi Vinnie, is the apartment ready for me tonight?”
“Yes, Ms. Morrison, Mr. Brooks has arranged everything for you and also, just so you know, the chef filled the fridge. He wasn’t certain what you liked, so he said to let me know of any special requests that you have. The trainers sent over a message that you need to eat a few more small meals a day than you currently are, something to do with your blood work indicating low iron. They asked that I give you this number to call for the Physician referral, said you would know what that meant?”
“Ah, yes, I do. Seems that my records from Dallas indicate that I must have another check-up from a recent injury. Thank you for letting me know.”
“I’ll show you to the apartment, Ms. Morrison. Right this way.” Led away by Vinnie, I had a flashback to all the tests while I was in the hospital and immediately afterward. It is hard to believe that a couple of months had already gone by since my head injury and I thought
only time flew when one was having fun?
The apartment was just as luxurious as the penthouse, with a view facing the east for the beautiful sunrise. I am so grateful to Harrison for providing me this comfortable place. It feels more like a hotel than an apartment. This particular model has one bedroom, a study/den, a dining room and two bathrooms. The kitchen is modern and complete with all the amenities; the only item missing was Cooper.
A text message from Harrison:
Just checking to see if u are all comfy? Please call me if u need anything
Replying:
Harrison, the apartment is breathtaking! Thank u for the hospitality. I will return the favor and cook dinner for u soon.
His response:
Sounds good
Checking in with Coop, “Hey Coop, I am all moved into the Millennium. I wish you were here. It’s Saturday, I bet you are at Sambuca’s. Call me!”
I am really tired and lack energy. Not sure what that is all about, but a hot bath will do me good. I have tomorrow to unpack everything and then a long day with Drew on Monday going over sales plans. Time is passing, not sure of where it is going, it feels like it is leaving me. I drift off to sleep in the bath and when I awake, I am startled, forgetting where I am. Getting settled will take some time. I make some tea and it helps me relax and calms my nerves down. I barely recall lying down; when I am startled awake with nausea. The tea really didn’t sit well on my stomach and is making its way back up.
After what seemed like hours on the bathroom floor, I managed to make my way back to bed and get comfortable again. It is now just beginning to break daylight. When I woke back up it was 2:00 in the afternoon. What, how on earth did I sleep that much? The physical therapy training must be kicking my rear end. No energy, lethargic feeling, maybe this is why they have recommended the extra small meals. I am concerned about the iron deficiency and my clothes are really too big for me, I just didn’t realize I had lost that much weight.
The chef really did a great job picking things that I liked. I made an omelet and drank some juice. Just hoping the food stayed in my system, as I am still slightly not feeling it, my body still feeling a little run-down. I tried hard to eat as much as I could and then I worked on unpacking my clothes and getting them arranged like Coop would if he were here. Funny, just thinking about all of his stylist’s duties and just wishing he were here. I realized that I had not heard from him. Grabbing my phone, I discover that I had not put it on a charger. Once the battery comes back up there are several messages from Dad, Coop and Harrison. All of the nosey men in my life checking to see if I am okay. I think I will do a blanket text to all of them and tell them to stop worrying, if that is possible!