Secrets (14 page)

AJ

The sound of my
father’s fork scraping against the bottom of his plate drove me to the brink of full-blown rage.  My mother caught me staring at him from across the table and cleared her throat to distract me.  When we made eye contact, she shook her head stiffly, demanding that I leave my animosity elsewhere during my stay at home for the holiday.

“How’s your steak?”  My father asked, smiling politely
to mask the malice behind his eyes.

When I didn’t offer a response, my mother set her glass down on the table.  “Anthony…..your father’s speaking to you?”

“It’s fine,” he said, patting my mother’s hand to quiet her.  Taking the time to casually wipe his mouth before addressing me, my father loosened his tie and sat back comfortably in his chair.  “I sure hope you intend to adjust your attitude before our houseguests arrive.  I’d hate for you to make them feel unwelcomed.”

Houseguests?
  More like victims.

“I won’t be here.  I have plans,” I replied, shoveling the food around my plate instead of eating it.

“Plans?”  My father asked with an air of knowing.

“With Sam.”

A heavy sigh from across the table brought my eyes to my father’s as he shot me a frustrated stare.

“
Mr. and Mrs. Tanaka are planning to be with us until Saturday morning,” my mother interjected.  “Did I forget to tell you?”

I
shook my head once, but said nothing, recalling the conversation that took place earlier that week.  My mother tried to convince me that my father merging his business with Mr. Tanaka’s was a strategic maneuver; however, I was too smart for her to pull the wool over my eyes.  Merging the two companies was my father’s last-ditch-effort to regain control of a rapidly spiraling situation at Arata – a situation that had all of us on constant high alert.  Mr. Tanaka’s money would help my father repay a large portion of the debt that he owed some very unsavory characters following a shoddy business deal; that’s what this was all about.  Mr. Tanaka had my father by the balls, although I doubt Mr. Tanaka was aware of it.  Knowing my dad, he made sure to highlight all the benefits of becoming business partners, leaving out how desperately he needed someone to bail him out of the mess his greed created.  If I had to bet, he even put a crafty enough spin on it that Mr. Tanaka actually felt like
he
was the one getting over.

“His
daughters will be joining us as well.  You remember the twins, don’t you, Son?” he asked smugly, pulling me from my thoughts. 

I ignored him again.

“I believe Kira and Reina are just about Anthony’s age,” he added, addressing my mother, but staring at me.

My mother perked up when he addressed her.  “Actually, they just celebrated a birthday last mont
h.  Their twentieth if I recall.”

My father
smiled at me again and it took everything in me not to reach across the table and hit him.

“It’s been years since
they’ve visited,” my mother added, smiling at a memory.  “You and the girls used to play for hours when we’d all vacation at the lake together.  Why is that you never kept in touch?” she inquired innocently.

Hearing the calm tone in which she spoke made me ease up a bit.

“We weren’t friends, Mom.  We only hung out when you guys decided to force us to spend our family vacations at that godforsaken cabin.”

My father laughed. 
“Nonsense.  No one was forced.  The Tanakas are close friends of the family.”

“Friends that you’re about to take advantage of to save
your
sorry a–“

“
Anthony
!”  My mother yelled before I finished.

The fake smile on my father’s face began to fade.  We sat there in a silent standoff that only ended because the doorbell rang.  Mother glanced back and forth between us both before realizing that she couldn’t keep our houseguests waiting to be greeted any longer.  She left the room in a
huff, wearing a weary expression.  My father held my gaze, silently trying to put me in my place, but if I hadn’t inherited anything else from him, I had his stubbornness.  We’d kill each other before either one would give in.

The Tanaka’s footsteps could be heard echoing as they made their way down the marble-tiled hallway coming toward us.  My father straightened in his seat and his expression changed like a switch had flipped – shifting into business mode.

He straightened his tie again and gave my appearance a onceover before shooting me a disapproving scowl.  “For heaven’s sake, at least take off that sweatshirt; you look like a……a
thug!
” he whispered coldly across the table, referencing the black hoodie I’d been wearing since I got in a few hours ago.  Initially, I had plans to hide the tattoo for as long as I could, hoping to keep the peace here in the house for my mother.  However, this hatred for my father overshadowed my sense of reason at the moment.  He wanted the hoodie off? I’d take it off. 

I stood
from my seat and snatched both shirts over my head just as the Tanakas came through the French doors of the dining room.  The sound of my mother’s embarrassed gasp silenced the lighthearted conversation she’d been carrying on with our guests prior to finding her son stripping at the dinner table.  My father’s jaw was so tense I thought he might stroke out, and it wasn’t until the shock of my behavior wore off that he even noticed Sam’s name in black ink on my neck.  His face turned redder than the burgundy paint on the walls. 

My mother put her hand to her
chest and stepped aside when I passed her on the way to my room.  I had to leave.  If I stuck around, I’d end up doing something I’d regret.   Shirts still in hand, I took the stairs two at a time, rushing to get my keys off the dresser so I could put this house in my rearview mirror. I put the hoodie on again once I was alone, and doubled back to get my phone off the bed, too.  I had a stunned audience of ultra-conservative onlookers when I made my exit through the front door.  Mr. Tanaka’s twins watched me curiously from the doorway of the living room, whispering to one another when our eyes locked briefly.

I didn’t care; they could say what they wanted.  Coming home was a mistake and I knew that before I even got here.  I spent most of the drive talking myself into not turning around and going back to school.  The only reason I made the trip was because I knew that if I didn’t, I’d miss my chance to see Sam.

I burned rubber when I sped out of my driveway, waiting for Karl to pick up his phone.

“Hey,
whassup,” he answered.

“Talk me down.”  I blew all the air from my lungs and looked at the speedometer when I reached 60 I
n a 25 mile per hour speed zone.

“He’s starting already?”  Karl asked.

“That dick thinks he owns the whole mother-f–“

“Dude, breathe.  Are you driving?”  He asked, hearing the
sound of Vick’s horn sounding off behind me when I slammed on my brakes purposely to stop him from tailing me so closely. 

I opened my sunroof to give
him the finger and then turned off onto the main road.  “On my way to Sam’s,” I answered dryly.

“What happened?”

I pictured that smug look on my father’s face and pressed down on the gas a little harder.  It was on the tip of my tongue to tell Karl everything, but I didn’t.  “Just business as usual,” I said, summing up all of my father’s actions.

“Well, if things get bad enough, you know you’re welcome to stay here at our house.  Or if not here, there’s always your guesthouse, right?”

I rolled my eyes thinking about my father expecting me to be on my best behavior because he needed Mr. Tanaka.  “Guesthouse is off limits.  We have people staying with us until Saturday.”

“
Oh…..well,
that
sucks.  My house is still an option, though.”

I thanked him and then fell silent again.

“Who’re the guests?”  Karl inquired.

“Mr. and Mrs. Tanaka and their daughters – no one you know. 
My dad went to college with him and our families used to share a lake house like every summer up until I was thirteen or something.”

“Oh, ok,” was all Karl got out before another call came through
on his other line.

“It’
s cool; take it.  I’m almost at Sam’s anyway – just needed to vent before I got to her place.”

“Call if you need to come by, though,” Karl offered again. 

“Will do.”

I ended the call and tried to let the remaining irritation fall away.  Rolling down the window and taking
in the cool November air helped some, but this tension ran a little too deep to be quenched so easily.  There was another way to release my frustration.

*****

Sam

The engine hummed so we could keep the heat on, and music lulled softly while we took care of business in the backseat.  I propped my leg up on the driver’s-side headrest and somehow AJ managed to shrink his 6’2” frame to fit comfortably on top of me.  The buckle to his jeans
, which were still attached to one leg, clanked to his rhythm.  To say that he was impatient was an understatement. 

It was clear
that something was wrong when he came to pick me up, but he didn’t offer up any information.  We went to our spot in the clearing near his uncle’s place.  He was far less talkative than usual, seeming to be most interested in what I could offer him
physically
.  He made that clear by interrupting the rundown of my family’s dinner conversation with a midsentence kiss so passionate that I forgot what I was even talking about.  I let him undress me and then ended up horizontal on the black, leather-upholstered seats.  We played around awhile, kissing, touching, sucking, and then abandoned the foreplay early as usual.

I bit back a
scream, muffling it slightly until I’d successfully turned it down to a less dramatic whimper when he slammed his way inside again.

“
AJ…..slow down a little?”  I asked when he opened his eyes and stared down at me.  “Please?”

It wasn’t until then that he saw the pained look on my face.  He lo
wered his head to kiss me.  “Sorry,” he answered, easing up immediately.  I could feel the tension in his rigid shoulders as I held them. 

I stared up when his eyes drifted closed again, listening to him sigh and moan
from deep within his chest.  It always intrigued me watching him climax – the expression, the sounds he makes, the way he loses control over his body’s movements.  Now that we’d finished, I saw a change in his mood.  He collapsed on top of me gently, pressing his face into my neck while he breathed deep.

“
I so needed that,” he panted.

Smiling to myself, I rubbed his back.  “Yeah…..I noticed.  So did
I, though.”

He lifted just enough to kiss my cheek and then my forehead.  “How is it that we just finished and I already want you again?”

I laughed and received another kiss, this time to the lips.  “Because you’re the horniest guy to ever walk the face of the Earth.  That’s why.  Always have been.”  I chuckled again.  “You know how many nights I’ve snuck out the house for you?”

He backed off of me and leaned against
the seat naked, feeling no sense of urgency in terms of clothing himself.  When he sighed I met his gaze.  With a faint smile, he asked, “How the hell are we supposed to concentrate on school work once I get there in January?  We may as well accept the fact that we’re gonna flunk out.”

I laughed and searched the floor for my panties.  “I’m sure we’ll manage.”

His eyes were on me as I pulled my t-shirt back on and ran my hand beneath my hair to free it from the collar.  Checking to make sure I still had both of my earrings in, I blushed when his stare persisted.  “What?”

There was something behind AJ’s eyes that warmed my heart.  “I just hope you know how much I love you, and that everything I do is for you.”

I heard and believed every word that he said. 

“Everything,” he reiterated.

“I love you, too,” I replied before leaning up to kiss him once.  A flicker of sadness filled his eyes.  Realizing that I noticed, AJ broke his gaze and started pulling his clothes on.  I watched as he fastened his jeans and threw his wife-beater and hoodie over his head.  Just when he reached for the door handle to head back up to the front, I touched his arm.

“What –
“ I stopped.  I was getting ready to ask for the umpteenth time what was going on.  However, I had the presence of mind to realize that this was not the time to question him.  It was clear that what he needed was to know that, if no one
else
had his back, I did. 

“I wish I could take it all away,” was what I chose to say instead,
pulling him into my arms for an embrace.  I didn’t realize how badly he needed it until ten minutes passed and he still hadn’t let me go.

We stayed and just linger
ed silently in one another’s presence for awhile before AJ took me home.  I looked back at him over my shoulder as I made my way to the front door.  He forced a smile that did nothing but make me more certain that he was spiraling.  I had a heavy sense of grief as I imagined what he’d have to face when he crossed the threshold of his home.

*****