Shattered Heart: The Donnellys, Book 3 (3 page)

Chapter Five

Cy
n curled her feet beneath her on the couch and turned on the television. It was Saturday night and she hadn’t heard from Carlos all day. She could’ve gone dancing with Angie but opted for ice cream and a juicy, cry-her-eyes-out chick-flick instead. Cyn had texted Carlos a few times, receiving no response. She’d also called once and gotten his voicemail but hadn’t left a message—why bother? There wasn’t anything to say. Apparently he’d gotten busy, probably with work or some other bullshit excuse he’d make.

Regardless, everything was more important than her, so right now she was all about the fuck it and fuck him attitude.

Flipping through the pay-per-view listings, her phone rang. Glancing at the screen she saw it was Carlos and in one motion, swiped the screen and pressed the device to her ear. “Hey.”

What she got back was the furthest thing from a reply, but instead a lot of muffled sounds in her ear.

“Carlos, you there? Can you hear me?” No response, just rustling…until she heard a woman’s voice in the distance.

Next was a woman giggling.
What the fuck?
And then Carlos’s muffled voice, “Come here, baby. No really. You got something there, let me get it for you, sweet thing.” More giggling, followd by a very distinct “Mmm” sound.

“Oh, hell no!” Cyn stood and the remote slipped from her lap, landing on the floor with a thud. “Carlos!” No response—except for more rustling sounds, plus another moan.

This was not happening. Could
not
be happening. Except it was.

“Carlos, you mother-fucking-cocksucker!” Rage flowed through Cyn like hot lava as she stormed to the kitchen. “I can hear you, you asshole!” How could he do this to her? Better question was, how
long
had he been doing this to her? No wonder they hadn’t been spending time together. No wonder they hadn’t been having sex either! He was so very obviously banging someone else.

The phone disconnected. Cyn pulled it from her ear and stared at the screen. Her whole body felt hot, yet her blood ran ice cold through her veins. Carlos had blown her off and ignored all her texts because clearly something
had
come up—that something being his dick. Cyn may’ve been blind—or choosing to be blind—to what he’d so obviously been doing but that didn’t make her stupid. She was however, a very pissed-off woman who was about to show him exactly what happened when her temper was invoked. She’d been holding tight to one final straw, and the asshole just broke it.

Cyn put on her sneakers and headed out the door to Carlos’s house. When she arrived, she parked—purposely blocking in his bullshit poor man’s Mercedes in the driveway. She stalked up the cement walkway toward his door, her anger making every inch of her skin itch. She raised a shaky hand to the door, clenched it into a fist and pounded.

No answer.

Of course there was no answer. The bastard was probably already fucking the chick Cyn heard on the phone. Cyn pounded again, and didn’t stop pounding until the door finally swung open.

“What the fu—”

“Exactly! You sonofabitch!” Cyn pushed past him into his living room.

“Hang on, baby.” He grabbed her by the arm, halting her.

Cyn jerked out of his hold. “Hang on to nothing. Where is she, Carlos?”

“Who?”

“Ugh, you are
such
an asshole!”

“Um…”

Cyn whirled around to find a petite redhead standing at the edge of the hallway. “Her!” She pointed at the woman before glaring back at Carlos. “Who the fuck is she and what the fuck—” Cyn looked back to the redhead and propped her hands on her hips. “What the
fuck
are you doing in my boyfriend’s house?”

The woman’s eyes went wide and her mouth dropped open.

“Baby, it’s not what you think.”

Cyn glared over her shoulder at him. Was he seriously going to deny what she was seeing with her own eyes? Her temper went into overdrive and fury raced through her like a raging river. There was no fucking way she was going to stand there and listen to this bullshit. “Not what I think? Really? Have you lost your fucking mind?”

* * * * *

Cy
n sat on Ryan and Maiya’s back porch, rocks glass full of Jameson in hand, bawling her eyes out. But she’d done it. She’d finally ended it with Carlos. And it’d gone down with a bang.

Maiya lit a cigarette and blew out a stream of smoke. “Honey, he’s a douchebag and I know it’s cliché to say, but you’re better off without him.”

Cyn took a swig of booze and then sniffled. The alcohol burned on its way down her throat, warming her insides but doing nothing for the chill that had settled in her bones. “I know.” She shrugged and stared into the golden liquid. “I mean, yeah, it’s cliché, but it’s true. Bastard doesn’t deserve me. God, I can’t believe he brought her home to his place.
And
tried to deny anything was going on!”

“I honestly don’t know how you didn’t go all Lorena Bobbitt on him.” Maiya drew on her smoke. “Hell, I would’ve.”

Cyn blurted a laugh through her tears. “Damn, now that’s funny. Definitely the Italian in you.” She shook her head. “No, I didn’t cut off any appendages, but I did lose my shit like some kind of crazy person. Especially after he was all, ‘Oh, baby, it’s not what you think. Don’t go assuming.’ Because, yeah, hearing his sleazy ass over the phone while he fondled whatever body part of hers he could get his grubby hands on, plus catching him with her in his house, would definitely be a big fucking false assumption on my part that he was screwing her.”

“Ugh, gross.” Maiya frowned. “I’m so sorry, sweetie.”

“Thanks. I’m not. It was bound to happen sooner or later.” The tears were back, which was stupid because she shouldn’t be crying. Instead, she should be relieved. Cyn wiped her cheeks but within seconds they were wet again. She finally knew, finally had some definitive closure, and now she could move on. Except, move on to what? Another asshole?

For whatever reason, Cyn had a habit of picking the same guy, over and over again. They might’ve had a different name and face, but they were all the same. Emotionally unavailable, almost always dishonest and totally disrespectful.

Cyn didn’t get it. What was it about these guys that they kept finding her? Or, maybe the better question was why was
she
finding and also falling for them? She leaned back in the lounger and sighed, swirling the liquid in her glass.

Maybe she did get it. After all,
she
was
the common denominator.

Her parents had such a good marriage, not perfect by any stretch, but all things considered, they were happy. It wasn’t as if Cyn didn’t have examples all around her for how a relationship should be or what it could be. She did. Fuck’s sake, all three of her older siblings were happily married too. Even Jimmy, the one who refused to open up to anyone after his ordeal with his ex-bitch-girlfriend, Gina, had found happiness again. So, why couldn’t Cyn?

“Earth to Cyn. Talk to me, honey.”

Cyn glanced over at her brother’s fiancé. “I’m sorry, Maiya.”

“And just what the hell are you apologizing for?” Maiya stubbed out her smoke in the ashtray. “You haven’t done anything wrong.”

“I have shit-poor timing, that’s what I’ve done. The last thing you need a week before your wedding is to be dealing with my drama.” Cyn stood.

“Uh-uh, no. You don’t get to do that. We’re friends, Cyn. And I love you to fucking bits, so sit your ass back down and talk about it as much as you need to. Besides, that’s what family does, right? They’re there for each other no matter what. At any time. And at any hour.” Maiya pointed a finger at her. “I have your family to thank for teaching me that. So don’t go feeling bad because you’re having drama. Your drama is welcome anytime, honey.”

“Shit.” Cyn buried her face in her hands as she burst into tears again. In the next moment, Maiya had her arms wrapped around her and Cyn sank into her embrace. “I don’t get it. I just don’t get it.”

Maiya smoothed her hand down the back of Cyn’s head. “Don’t get what, honey?”

Cyn pulled away and sniffled. “Damn, I need another tissue.”

“Hold the snot, I’ll grab you one.” Maiya ran inside and brought a tissue back out for Cyn. “Here, sweetie. Blow. Then tell me what you don’t get.”

Cyn sopped up her face and nose, and tried again. “I don’t get why I keep picking these guys. I mean, I get it.” She sat on the edge of the lounge and Maiya sat beside her. “I get that it’s me that’s picking them, but what I don’t understand is why.”

“Well…” Maiya shrugged. “You got a broken picker.”

“A what?” Cyn wiped her nose.

Maiya smiled and rubbed Cyn’s back. “A broken picker.” She held up one finger, bending and straightening it. “Your picker’s broken. And that’s why you keep picking creeps to date. I should know, mine was broken for
years
.”

“All right, but…” Cyn stared at her fingers. “Why? I mean, it’s not like my family is all fucked up or that I come from a broken home— No offense.” She nudged Maiya’s shoulder.

“None taken. But who knows why, Cyn. I guess that’s something you need to figure out. Maybe once you do, you can un-break it.”

“You think I should stay single for a little while?”

“Might be a good idea. Give yourself a break from men for a bit. It sure can’t hurt.”

Cyn blew out a breath and then took another sip of her drink. She looked up at the stars decorating the sky. “A relationship moratorium?”

“Okay. Yeah, that’s definitely a term you could use. It’s also a song by Alanis Morissette, but whatever.” Cyn snorted a laugh and Maiya giggled too. “Take a few months and spend some time working on you. Maybe pour your focus on your business.”

“A year.”

“Whoa! A year? You’re going to stay single for a whole year?”

Cyn swallowed the rest of her drink. “Yeah. You think I can’t do it?”

“Shit. A year? No sex? You’re a braver woman than me.” Maiya lit another cigarette.

“Yeah. A year. No sex.” Cyn nodded. “I’m doing it…or not doing
it
to be specific.”

Maiya smiled. “All righty then. From this day forward I now dub thee celibate!”

“Ooh, that’s a scary word.” Cyn scrunched up her nose. “Like I’m a nun or something—hey! There’s an idea.”

Maiya laughed. “No. That’s a very bad idea. Besides, you’d have to cover your adorably cute hair under a habit. And start praying the rosary and shit.”

“Nuns don’t wear habits anymore.” Cyn laughed.

“Whatever. Either way, you’re not nun material. Plus, the clothes aren’t flattering.” Maiya smiled.

“True. But I’m serious about the moratorium. I’m doing this, I’m staying single for a year.” She nodded. “I think I need another drink. I think I’m going to need a lot of drinks. Maybe if I stay drunk for the next three hundred and sixty-five days, the time’ll just fly by.”

Maiya laughed again and took Cyn’s glass from her hand. “One more Jameson coming up. Just remember to pace yourself. Oh, and I’ll get the guest room ready for you. No way you’ll be driving home tonight, Ms. Celibate.”

Cyn watched Maiya disappear into the house as she stretched out on the lounge again. She had no idea what she was doing, but she was willing to try. She’d had enough shitty relationships to last her a lifetime, taking a year off to figure out what her issues were and to fix them was a scary but necessary thing to do. It would be a process, and definitely not something for the faint of heart. But Cyn could do it. As a Donnelly, stubbornness was in her DNA. And she was definitely stubborn enough to follow through.

Chapter Six

Apparen
tly Shane had arrived in town just in time for Ryan’s wedding. In true Donnelly fashion, they’d insisted he attend. Which also included the bachelor party. He sure as hell wasn’t going to say no. Which was why he was now at the wedding rehearsal sitting in the middle of a pew in the back of the church they’d all attended when they were kids, while the entire wedding party scurried around up front as the priest and the wedding planner directed them to their proper places to stand. What a circus—but definitely a fun one.

As entertained as Shane was at the familiar chaos, his focus kept gravitating toward one person in particular: Cynthia Donnelly. Blowing out a breath, he stretched his arms out on the back of the pew. The last time he’d seen Cyn she was still in high school. Christ—he cringed and glanced at the crucifix.
Whoops.
He blessed himself and focused on Cyn again.

She had been two years behind Joey and him in school, and Shane remembered always finding her cute. But in a “she was his best friend’s little sister and off-limits” kind of way. She’d sure grown up since then.

She was still cute, and probably still off-limits—except now it was in a “sexy, petite and curvy in all the right places” kind of way. His exact kind of way, to be specific. Damn, was he really sitting in church lusting after his best friend’s little sister? Shane shifted in the pew and adjusted the rapidly rising hard-on in his jeans. Yep, he sure as hell was. Cynthia Donnelly had grown up and Shane liked what he saw. A lot.

A tall, slender blonde took a seat at the end of the pew in front of him. Jimmy came running over to her, bent and kissed her cheek and then said something in her ear too low for Shane to hear. The woman placed her hand on his cheek as she laughed. Jimmy glanced up and caught Shane’s eyes. “Oh, wow. Shane?”

Shane got to his feet and moved to them. “Live and in person.” He extended his hand. “How ya been, Jimmy?”

The blonde turned around and faced him as Jimmy shook his hand and pulled him into a brief embrace. “Damn good, man. Wow, it’s good to see you. I found out last night you were in town. It’s been what? Sixteen, seventeen years?”

Shane stepped back and smiled. “Pretty much. Since I lived here anyway. I’ve popped in for a few visits here and there, but yeah, seventeen years. I hear you’ve been making a name for yourself with your art.”

“Giving it hell.” Jimmy smiled, shaking his head. “God, it’s fucking great to see you, bro.”

“James, watch your mouth, we’re in a church,” the blonde whispered as she smoothed her hand up the back of her pulled-up hair.

“Yep, and you’re Jewish. I’m sure Jesus will forgive both of us.” Jimmy laughed and the blonde scowled at him, then rolled her eyes.

Shane covered his mouth, stifling his own laughter. “You haven’t changed one bit, Jimmy.”

“Nah. No fun in that. Anyway, Shane, this is my beautiful woman, Sonja. Sonja, meet my brother Joey’s best and oldest friend.”

Sonja stood and extended her hand to him. “Now that we know everyone’s religion, and I’m thoroughly mortified, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Shane shook her hand. “Ma’am.” He nodded. “Pleasure. Please don’t be embarrassed, I’ve known this guy his whole life.”

“Damn straight. Awesome you’re gonna make the wedding. You’re coming to the bachelor party tonight, right?” Jimmy wrapped his arm around Sonja’s waist.

“Wouldn’t miss it. I’m staying with Joey and Stephanie, so where he goes, I go.”

Jimmy cocked his head to the side. “Not staying with your mom?”

“Hell no.” Shane chuckled. “I’m doing some work on the house for her, but I’m not staying there. We get along much better when we don’t share space. You know that.”

“Some things never change, huh? Sorry to hear.” Jimmy nodded.

“Jimmy, get your butt over here! You’re holding up the rehearsal.”

Jimmy looked over his shoulder and Shane followed his gaze. Cyn was standing in the middle of the center aisle, hands on her hips, annoyed expression on her face. Shane laughed. “Some things never change is right.”

“Yup, she’s still bossing us around.” Jimmy kissed Sonja on the cheek. “Better get back before she comes over and grabs me by the ear. We’ll catch up later.”

Sonja resumed her spot in the pew. “You’re welcome to join me.”

Shane took her up on the offer and slid next to her. “Thanks.”

“Personally, I think I’d enjoy seeing Cyn grab him by the ear. But maybe that’s just James’s sick sense of humor rubbing off on me.” She grinned.

Shane chuckled. “I’ve seen it. Trust me, it’s pretty funny. So how long have you and Jimmy been together?”

“It’s been a little over eight months now. I think.” She tilted her head to the side, a thoughtful expression on her face. “We can’t agree on an official date, but technically we met almost a year ago.”

Shane fixed his gaze on Cyn, watching every sway of her hips as she bounced back and forth between the bridesmaids and the groomsmen. “Sounds like there’s a story there.”

“Oh, I’m sure James will fill you in tonight. He
loves
to tell people all about how we met and what a pain in the ass I was. He says it’s our love story.”

Cyn bent over to gather the bouquets of flowers for the bridesmaids, her full ass on perfect display. Shane blew out a breath and lost all train of thought. Damn, what he could do with that ass. He ran his hand along the back of his neck and blew out another breath.

“Looks like you’ve got a story you’re wanting to write.” Sonja laughed.

Shane dragged his gaze away from Cyn and all her delicious curves, and focused on Sonja. “I’m sorry, what was that?”

She raised a single brow and nodded her head in Cyn’s direction. “The expression on your face is priceless right now.”

Shane’s face got hot. She’d caught him gawking, and obviously there was no point in denying it. “I’ve known her since she was a little girl in pigtails.”

“Yes, but now she’s a woman.”

“Yeah.” He ran his hand along the top of his head. “She sure is.”

Sonja crossed her arms and let out another chuckle. Shane snorted and bent forward, resting his elbows on the back of the pew in front of him. Cynthia was
all
woman. Wrapped in a pair of tight blue jeans and a white tank top that hugged her very ample chest and tiny waist. Yeah.
Alllll
woman.

Regardless, Cyn was still Joey’s little sister and Shane would do his very best to keep his hands to himself. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t look. He was a disciplined Marine. A damn good soldier. But he was also a hot-blooded male and
not
looking just wasn’t going to be possible.

Cyn ran around the front of the church, helping the wedding planner get everyone in order. And was completely distracted by the fact that Shane Conlon—God help her and be still her racing heart, Shane-fucking-Conlon—was sitting in the back of the church. Staring at her like she had a target on the front of her shirt. It was the sole reason she’d gone into director mode and was pretty much trampling over the wedding coordinator and bossing everyone around. Jeez, she must look like some kind of control freak from hell.

Why in God’s name was he in town? Near as Cyn could figure, it’d been about seventeen years since she’d last seen him. And about fourteen years since she’d thought about him. Prior to that? Well, Cyn had thought about Shane Conlon daily. He was her grade-, middle- and high-school crush. As a teenager she’d followed him around like a pathetic little puppy whenever he was at their house—which was pretty much every day. Joey hated her tagging along and most times ran her off, so instead she’d just hang back in the shadows and spy on them.

Shane had been a to-die-for, hot-as-hell teen boy. His brown hair a little too long. His blue eyes a little too bright. And his devil-may-care attitude far too appealing. But the dimple in his chin, God if that dimple didn’t just beg to be kissed. She’d always wanted to press her lips against it.

“Cyn? What next?” Jimmy asked.

Gah…focus, Cyn!
“Um… I think we need to run through who’s doing the readings, right?” She glanced at the wedding coordinator hoping for an answer.

“Yes, I have Angie down for the first reading,” the woman said.

“Present and accounted for.” Angie stepped up to the lectern, her black knee-high boots accentuating her already long legs.

Free to return to her memory stroll through the neighborhood of Shane, Cyn took a breath and glanced over at him. Yep, he was still staring. At the beginning of her junior year of high school, Shane had shipped off to boot camp. And that was that, except she pined over him for the entire year after. She’d even written him a few letters the first few months after he was gone, but he’d never replied to any of them. By the time she hit senior year, she’d moved on, forgetting all about Shane—as much as anyone could forget their childhood crush anyway.

And now here he was, all tall, buff and tanned. More gorgeous than a man had any right to be…with his now-close-cropped brown hair and bright blue eyes. Eyes that wouldn’t stop staring at her. And his dimple, she swore the freaking thing was calling her name.

Cyn’s entire body felt like it was boiling in a pot of hot water. Her stomach had tied itself into a knot and she was sweating. Nice. How sexy was that? Good thing she’d worn a tank top that day; sweat stains on a T-shirt were in no way attractive. That’s assuming he even found her attractive. Maybe he was staring because he wasn’t sure who she was? People changed a lot in seventeen years. He hadn’t, not really, but she had. In more ways than one.

Mary stepped beside her, nudging Cyn’s hip. “What’s up? Are you feeling okay? You look a little pale.”

“What? Oh,” Cyn wiped her brow. “Yeah. I think. Well…” Her tongue felt like it was coated with rubber cement. She crossed her arms and glanced over her shoulder at Shane again.

Mary followed her gaze. “Ohhhhh. I see.” Her sister laughed.

“Don’t go there, Mary. I’m in no mood.”

“I’m not going anywhere, but by the looks of it, you sure seem to be.”

“So what? It’s not a big deal. I mean really, look at him. All fine as hell. Even you can’t deny that.”

“Oh, believe me, I love my husband, but I’m not blind or dead. That man is one hundred percent grade-A prime beefcake.”

“Way to objectify.” Cyn snorted. “Sadly, you’re right.”

“And you’re single. Wonder if he is too.” Mary wagged her brows.

Her sister Celia came up beside them. “What’re we talking about?”

“Boy stuff.” Cyn brushed her bangs away from her eyes and winked at Celia. “Doesn’t matter, Mary. I’m staying single. Besides, I’m currently nursing a broken heart.”

“Very true, honey. You doing okay?” Mary touched Cyn’s arm.

“Take it from me, girls suck just as much. Sorry, Cyn.” Celia kissed her cheek and walked away.

The subject change was welcome, though the topic wasn’t one Cyn wanted to get in to. “I’ll be fine.”

It was true. She would be fine. The initial sting of finding Carlos with another woman had settled into a dull ache and she was actually starting to feel relief. Odd thing was she figured she’d be more broken up than she was, and it made her realize she should’ve ended things long before she had.

It was amazing the things a person found themselves tolerating simply because they’d gotten used to them, built a resistance. Sadly, Cyn had grown accustomed to not being treated well—in truth, she’d taught every single guy in the last five years how to treat her. It’d become the norm, being treated badly, and she was disgusted with herself for allowing that kind of trash in her life.

She glanced at Mary to find her staring at her, concern evident in her eyes. “Truly, Mary, I’m fine. I’ll be fine.” Cyn forced a smile and stepped away from her. She didn’t need to be mothered by her older sister; that’s what Mom was for. Not that she was looking for mothering either. Cyn had made a decision the other night while talking with Maiya, and Shane Conlon be damned, she intended to stick to her guns.

Moratorium was the name of the game. And she wasn’t going to deviate from the plan.

Cyn stole another peek at Shane and immediately regretted it. He was mid-stretch, his large arms over the top of his head, biceps bulging as he flexed, arching his back. His gaze was locked on her the whole time, and as he dropped his arms back to his sides, the corner of his mouth tilted into a delectable grin. A bolt of lust shot through Cyn and her skin burst into a tingling blaze. She groaned and wiped the bead of sweat trickling down the side of her neck.

Damn. Timing was a bitch with a capitol B.