Authors: Renee Flagler
“Okay,” Pearson said, voicing her surprise.
“Walter could run the company just fine until you decide if you want to take it overâor not.” Candice shrugged. “Okay?” Pearson nodded. “Now.” Candice clapped punctuating her orders and then stood. “That's all the talking about death we are going to do. Let's get on with our lives.”
When Pearson stood, Candice pulled her into a long embrace. Pearson wrapped her arms around her mother's slim waist and held her back just as tight. When Candice pulled back, her eyes glistened. “Thank you, Pearson. You have given me the greatest going away present ever.”
Pearson snorted and shook her head at the way Candice so easily shifted from one matter to another in such a no-nonsense manner. At that moment, she realized just how much her personality mirrored her mother's.
Chapter 47
Ryan
Ryan woke with a start, looked around the room and then remembered she was at her mother's house. She looked at the piles of clothing around her and sighed. When she left Anderson and his pregnant mistress at the benefit, she ordered the driver to take her back home immediately. She tossed a few twenties as an incentive and he followed her instructions.
Frannie met her there and they stuffed everything they could into her mother's SUV. Ryan knew starting over with a baby and no income would be hard, but she looked forward to the peace her new life had to offer. She had already begun to develop a blueprint for the next phase.
“Ryan.” Frannie whispered from the opposite side of the door.
“I'm up, Ma.”
Frannie pushed her way into the room, traveling through a trail of Ryan's belongings while balancing a tray.
“I brought you some toast, eggs, bacon, and a cup of tea, honey,” Frannie said and sat the tray on the night stand. Flopping on the bed, Frannie yawned and then patted Ryan's leg. “How ya doing, kiddo?”
Ryan felt proud for taking a stand, regardless of how costly.
“Good! I can't believe that bastard went out and had a baby on you. I swear, when see him, I ought to pop him one good time.”
Ryan chuckled and shook her head. “That won't be necessary.”
“I know, but it would feel awfully good!” They shared a laugh. After a few beats, Frannie asked, “Did you tell him yet.”
“No.” Ryan instinctively placed her hand on her stomach and thought for a few moments. “I'll let him know soon enough.”
“You do that. He's obligated to take care of that baby and the money will certainly help until you get on your feet.” Frannie stood. “I'll leave you to your breakfast. I'm going to get ready to run a few errands. Let me know if you're up to going with me. I'll even let you ride shotgun. Ha!” Frannie laughed at her own joke.
Ryan offered up a chuckle for support. “I will.”
When Frannie left the room, Ryan got out of bed. She wanted to continue making her list of all the things she would need, but the phone interrupted her plan.
Ryan saw Anderson's number, rolled her eyes toward the ceiling and then answered, “Hello.”
“Ryan?”
“Who else would it be?” she smarted.
“I need you to come home so we can straighten this out. We need to talk.”
“Is the baby yours?”
The phone went silent.
“Is. It. Yours,” Ryan repeated.
After a few more beats of stillness, Anderson finally responded, “Yes.”
“Then there's nothing for us to talk about. When you're ready to marry your mistress, contact me about the divorce. Until then, have a great life.” Although she couldn't see him, she could tell by his breathing that Anderson was angry. “Oh and when our baby gets here, I'll let you know so you can send child support payments. Goodbye, Anderson.”
“What?” Ryan heard him yell just before ending the call.
She snickered imagining how that bit of news must have hit him. Her phone rang right after she hung up. For a moment she contemplated sending the call to voicemail.
“You're pregnant?” Anderson asked as soon as she picked up. He sounded out of breath.
“Yes,” Ryan confirmed and waited for him to respond.
After a long pause, Anderson said, “Come home, Ryan.”
“I can't.”
“Then I'm coming there.”
The line went dead.
Immediately, she got up and went to freshen up. It wouldn't take long for Anderson to get to her mother's house, but she was ready for him.
Anderson arrived just moments after Frannie left. The timing was perfect.
Ryan opened the door as Anderson approached the small porch. She was surprised by his disheveled appearance and wondered if he had actually been crying. Anderson was always a hard man so she dismissed the possibility.
Anderson followed Ryan into the cozy living room. She gestured for him to sit and parked herself on the opposite sofa, folding her feet under her.
“Oh. I'm sorry. Did you want anything to drink? I don't mean to be rude.”
For a while, Anderson just looked at her. “No. I'm fine,” he finally said. “Why didn't you tell me,” he asked, nodding toward her belly.
Ryan looked away at first. In the short time they'd been apart, she felt free. She was no longer afraid to handle intense matters with Anderson. “I was going to tell you after the benefit, but your girlfriend's news changed that.”
“We can work this out, Ryan.”
Ryan pursed her lips and sighed. “No we can't.”
“I love you!” he said as if he were ordering her to believe him.
Ryan rose from where she was perched, sat on the couch next to Anderson, and took him by his hand. Gently, she lifted his chin until they were facing each other eye-to-eye.
“It's too late. I tried everything I could to keep this marriage together and took everything you threw at me. For so long I was afraid of what life would be like without you, without the lifestyle you provided for me, but for the first time ever, I realize that my own peace, sanity and dignity are so much more important. I can't stay with you, Andy.”
“What will you do without me, you don't have anything?”
“I know.” Ryan shrugged. “I'll still be fine.”
“Ryan-”
She interrupted him, pressing her finger against his lips.
“I'm not changing my mind. You can keep your money, the house, carsâeverything. I don't want any of it.”
Anderson cocked his head to the side and looked at her as if she were out of her mind. He shifted his gaze around the room as if trying to think of what to say next.
“Don't be upset because I'm not.”
His face scrunched in confusion.
“What are you saying?”
I'm saying that I deserve so much more. I'm praying that this time everything goes well with the pregnancy and when the baby gets here, we can make arrangements. I won't stand in the way of you having a relationship with your child.”
“This time.” Anderson tilted his head at her. “You were pregnant before.”
Ryan sat back and chuckled. “Yes, but I miscarried each time.”
Anderson looked down at his hands. Ryan could have sworn she saw them quiver.
“It's okay, Anderson. That's in the past.” She found herself rubbing his back.
“Things were changing with us,” Anderson said.
Ryan was surprised at the pleading in his eyes. This softer side of Anderson had been missing during most of their marriage. “I thought so tooâ¦until the benefit.”
Anderson dropped his head. Together they sat silently absorbing her words. After a while Ryan stood.
“Thank you for coming by. You were right. We needed to talk. I'll let you out.” Ryan began walking to the door.
It took some time before Anderson followed her. Ryan waited by the door. When he finally reached her, she saw the glistening in his eyes. Anderson lowered his lips to hers. She turned away. Turning her head back toward him, he kissed her hard, showing more passion than Ryan had experienced in years.
Anderson released her and rested his head against hers. They stayed that way for a while. Ryan stepped back first, pulled the door open and said, “Goodbye, Anderson.”
Without responding, Anderson solemnly walked out. As soon as he made it past the threshold, Ryan closed the door and leaned against it. She knew this would be difficult, but from the moment she decided to let go, she felt lighter. She had made the right choice.
Starting over wouldn't be easy, but it would be her way.
Chapter 48
Nadalia
Nadalia closed the lawyer's office door behind her, but continued holding the doorknob to keep her balance. She had given her attorney the game face as he handed her copies of the documents that she'd paid him extra money to draw up quickly. Now she was on her way to deliver them to Sage personally. First, she had to catch her breath.
Nadalia got herself together and headed for her car. The drive home seemed surreal since it had been almost two weeks since she set foot in her own house. But she had no intention of going back there. There was no way her house would ever really feel like home again. Too many reminders lived there.
When Nadalia pulled up in front of the house, she sat in the car for a long time thinking about what she was about to do. Sage wouldn't be home for a few more hours, which gave her enough time to pack a few more of her things to carry back to her mother's house. She'd wait until he came so she could serve him the papers before she left.
Finally, Nadalia got out of the car, stuffed her keys in her coat pocket, and lugged up the walkway. She pushed her key in the door and it opened. Frightened for a quick moment, Nadalia looked up and stared directly into Sage's red eyes. She drew in a sharp breath and for a second, thought about turning back. Sage stepped aside to let her in and then leaned over to plant a routine kiss on her cheek. She turned away.
Nadalia wondered why he was home, but refused to ask, not wanting to show concern. His disheveled look had already clued her in on the fact that he wasn't handling the separation well. Either that or he was afraid that she may have let out his secret. She was glad to find that she wasn't the only one suffering, but she was even happier to find that it also showed that at least he cared.
“Um. I came to bring you these and get a few more of my things.” Nadalia handed him the papers and headed up the steps to their room as swiftly as possible.
“Divorce papers!” he yelled as she retreated.
Nadalia's gut tightened when she heard his footsteps trailing hers.
“Nadalia! Don't you think this is a little rash? We haven't even had a chance to really talk about this whole thing.”
“I've heard all I needed to hear,” Nadalia said, tugging an overnight back from the depths of her closet. “And, I can't get what I saw out of my head.”
“Can we at least give this a little more time?”
“That's not necessary. My decision is made.” Nadalia pulled a few blouses off the hangers and stuffed them into the bag. She wanted to get out of there.
Sage stood with his back against the wall and the papers dangling from his hands, watching her throw clothes in the bags. “I need time.”
Nadalia stopped, placed one hand on her hip. “For what? I'm not going to change my mind.”
“Babe!” Nadalia cringed and then tossed a few pairs of shoes in the bag. “It's too soon. Maybe you'll feel different after a little while. We could go to therapy. People get over infidelity all of the time.”
“Sage! You slept with men! There's no getting over that!” She slammed the shoe that she had in her hand into the bag and punched at the clothes inside so she could close the zipper.
“I'm not gay!”
“Well, what do you call it?”
“It's just somethingâ¦different.”
Nadalia threw him a sharp glare. Had it been a blade, it would have cleanly sliced his head off his body. She threw her hands up in frustration. “Look. I can't do this,” she said and flopped down on the bench in the center of the closet. After a while she asked, “How long has this been going on?”
Sage dropped his head.
“That long, huh?” Nadalia sucked her teeth.
Sage looked the other way.
“You and Coffey thought no one would ever find out, didn't you? Does Niles, Anderson and Mike know about this?”
The frightened look in his eyes told her they didn't. Another concrete answer without words.
“Have you been tested?”
“Come on. I don't have HIV or AIDS.”
“Answer my question!” she yelled.
“Yes,” he said quietly.
Fear struck her. What if she was infected? “What were the results, Sage?” Nadalia stood to her feet, closing in the space between them.
“Negative,” he answered in the same small tone.
“I can't hear you!” Nadalia shouted, needing to hear him again for confirmation.
“I'm clean!” he shouted back.
Nadalia's exhaled. She felt like she was watching her life play out in a drama. It didn't feel real. Nothing did. She thought about the possibility of having contracted HIV and became even angrier.
“You put me at risk.” Nadalia ran to him and pushed him hard. His brawn body absorbed her assault without moving. She realized her attempts at inflicting any physical harm would prove futile. She sat back down.
Nadalia grew nauseous and charged past Sage, with her hand folded over her stomach. Pushing the toilet seat in the master bath back, she heaved, but nothing came out. Her emotions pooled into the center of her stomach forming a huge knot.
Sage was behind her, patting her back. She shrugged him off, cutting her eyes at him. She didn't come here for this. She thought she was done with all of the crying and stomach churning. Now in his presence, the hurt and anger twisted inside of her with the force of a tornado. She needed air.
Nadalia ran down the stairs and out to the expansive back yard to take in fresh air. She looked up and again, Sage was at her side. Nadalia turned and went back inside.