Something Scandalous (18 page)

Will did not believe her. His father had loved his mother and been devastated by her death. Only his stepmother’s love had brought him back from the loss. He never would have cheated on Will’s mother.

“I believe you should take your leave now,” Will stated firmly.

“Of course, Your Grace.” Richard stood and assisted his wife out of her seat. “We are both very sorry for any pain this might have caused you.”

Will refused to acknowledge Richard’s remark. He sat frozen in his chair, unable to do anything but think about what he and Elizabeth had done this morning. And over a week ago. She had yet to let him know if she thought she might be pregnant. There was a strong possibility that she was already with child.

After they left, he brought his hands to his temples. Rubbing his head, he thought more about the situation. To him, it just didn’t seem feasible. But Elizabeth never knew his father and had no idea what an honorable man he was. Will knew it was up to him to tell her.

He stood and slowly walked up the steps to her room. He knocked on the door but received no reply. Quietly, he opened the door and saw her facedown on the bed weeping. He closed the door and approached her.

“Go away, Will.”

He sat on the bed next to her and rubbed her back. Every muscle tensed under his hand. “Elizabeth, we need to discuss this.”

“What is there to talk about? Apparently, I am your sister,” she choked out. “Which means what we did just this morning was…”

Her tears broke his heart. “It was not incest, Elizabeth.”

She rolled over on her back. “How can you be certain? We have no proof of who I am!”

“I know my father. He would never have done such a thing.”

“You don’t know that. Until my father told me, I would have said the same thing about my mother.”

Will clasped her hand in his. “My father loved my mother with all his heart. When she died, I think he wished he had died, too. The only thing that kept him going was the children and his career.”

Elizabeth shook her head. “Any marriage can hit a rough patch that later makes it stronger. You would have only been a year old. Anything might have happened to pull them apart and you wouldn’t remember.”

“No, you are wrong.”

“Will, I went through the same thing when I found out about my mother. I denied the possibility and didn’t wish to believe the story. But my father had nothing to gain by telling me.” Elizabeth tried to reach for his hand.

Will pulled it away. “This is not the same. You heard the story directly from your father. We have no idea if Caroline is speaking the truth. The little I know of her, I would not believe her.”

She sighed. “You are right about Caroline, but we can’t possibly know the truth until we find my mother’s diary.”

Will stood up and paced by the bed. “Even then, there is nothing to say the information we need is in the journal. She might have taken her secret to the grave.”

“It has to be there, Will. I cannot bear it any longer. I must find out who my father was.” Elizabeth stood and wiped away her tears.

“It wasn’t my father.” Will stopped and stared at the beautiful woman in front of him. He wanted to drag her into his arms and kiss away her fears.

But he couldn’t do that any longer. While there was any doubt about his father, he had to stay away from her. But he had to do something.

“Let’s find that diary.”

Elizabeth searched in the dining room, desperate to find a secret panel that might hide a journal. At least this time she had everyone’s assistance. Will had even questioned the servants to see if anyone knew of any hidden doors or panels. When the children arrived home, Will told their tutor they were done for the day. He then told them what he and Elizabeth were looking for so they could help. The children decided to search their rooms again for her.

By nightfall, they were no closer to finding the diary than when Richard and Caroline had left this afternoon. Elizabeth was starting to wonder if she had scoured the estates as carefully as she thought. Had she missed something there? She hadn’t spent a large amount of time on two of the estates because her mother rarely went to them. They were too far from London and not in the best condition. It made no sense that she would have hidden her journal at either home.

She had focused her energy on the manor home in Kendal and the estate in Hampshire. After spending a month in each house, she had thoroughly searched the homes and found nothing. She banged her fist against the wall of the dining room in frustration.

“Are you all right?”

Elizabeth turned to see Will standing in the room, staring at her as if she had gone mad. “No, I am not all right,” she admitted.

He drew her into his arms and held her. It was as though he knew no words would comfort her now. But being in his arms helped her immensely. If only she could stay here forever.

Slowly, she pulled away so no servant would see them. “Thank you,” she whispered.

“I searched the music room, but to no avail,” Will said.

Elizabeth nodded. “Why don’t you try the salon? Maybe there is a panel I missed.”

“Very well.” Will turned and left her alone to her searching again.

At nine, Will told the children to go to bed. She sat in his study staring at the cold fireplace. A lone tear fell down her cheek.

“We will find it, Elizabeth.” Will sat across from her but reached over to hold her hand.

“I’m not certain it is even here,” she said with a shrug. “Maybe I missed something at the estates. Maybe there never was another diary. She probably burned it so my father would not discover it.”

“Is there anyone who might have been your mother’s confidante?”

“She was friends with most of the ladies of the
ton
. But I do not remember any special friend. I suppose I could try the dowager Lady Selby. They were close in age so maybe she will know more.”

Elizabeth tried not to let the tentacles of defeat wrap around her, but she failed. She highly doubted Lady Selby was her mother’s closest friend. The only time she remembered Lady Selby visiting was when Elizabeth and Jennette were playing together.

Will squeezed her hand. “We will find it.”

“What if we don’t? I know you are trying to remain positive but there is a very good chance we will never find the diary.”

“I don’t know what we will do then,” he said with a frustrated sigh. “Pretend this never happened and pray you are not with child?”

She knew from his angry tone he didn’t mean what he’d said, still the words stung. How could she pretend she wasn’t in love with him? It was an impossible situation.

“Perhaps we should ask Somerton for help,” he said.

“Absolutely not.” Elizabeth drew her hand away. “I will not allow him to know our personal business.”

“Selby told me he is the best.”

“Will, I could never bear the embarrassment. He would assume we’ve been intimate. He might tell others. What if that did happen and Caroline’s words are true? Everyone would discover that we had an incestuous relationship.”

“Very well,” he said. “We shall continue this your way. But if we don’t uncover something soon, I will speak with Somerton.”

Elizabeth nodded, fighting back the tears that seemed to be constantly near since this afternoon. Will rose and stood before her, holding out his hands to her. She took his hands and he drew her into a tight embrace.

“We will find out the truth. There has to be someone who knows what happened.”

She desperately wanted to believe that. As she stood in the warmth of his arms, she thought of one person who might be able to help. Sophie would never reveal Elizabeth’s secrets and her friend just might be able to use her powers to help her. Before she ever spoke to Lady Selby, she would call on Sophie again.

Feeling his breath on her forehead, she wanted to tell him how she felt about him. But now was not the time. There might not ever be a right time to tell him if Caroline’s scandalous lies were in fact truth. If they did not find some proof soon, she would leave with her small allowance and try to forge a new life.

And attempt to pretend this never happened. As if that were possible.

The next morning Elizabeth left to visit Sophie while Will continued to search for the diary. He decided to investigate his room thoroughly, including taking apart his small desk. It made the most sense that her mother would have hidden a diary in their bedroom rather than another room in the house. After removing every drawer in the desk, he found nothing.

He sat in the chair and rubbed his temples. What was he missing? There had to be some clue they had overlooked. Perhaps Elizabeth had missed something in the other journals she had found.

Will lifted his head up and looked around the room. He couldn’t give up. There had to be something here. Walking to the fireplace, he put his hands on the wood moldings above the mantel. The first panel didn’t budge so he moved to the one on the right side. The panel moved and groaned slightly.

Examining the panel, Will realized that it lifted up. As it opened, he breathed a sigh of relief. He’d found it! He reached inside and pulled out a small leather-bound journal. After wiping off the dust on his trousers, he sat down in the chair by the fireplace.

He traced the gold initials JMK with his finger. He should wait and give the book to Elizabeth, but curiosity overcame his good intentions. Slowly, he opened the book. As he read the first page, a wave of disappointment crashed over him. This was not her mother’s diary. It belonged to the late duke.

Will paged through the journal, hoping to find some mention of the duchess’s infidelity. Instead, all he found was the infidelities of the duke. Apparently, the man had a voracious sexual appetite that his wife couldn’t satisfy. Then again, neither could half the female servants in the house, and several ladies of the
ton.

No wonder his wife had had an affair. The poor woman was probably out for revenge. Will tilted back his head and stared at the white ceiling. He couldn’t show this to Elizabeth. It would break her heart to discover what her mother had gone through.

Will glanced back down at the open page on his lap and shook his head. The entry for the day simply read:

Knowing Elizabeth’s mother was named Mary, Will briefly wondered who Camille was, but assumed it was most likely his mistress at the time. He turned a few pages and read more.

Good God, the man was a pig. Feeling rather dirty, he scanned the rest of the journal for some entry regarding the duke’s wife. After finding nothing, Will decided to return the diary to its hiding place.

Elizabeth waited for Sophie in the small salon while her friend finished with a client. Finally, she entered the room her blue silk swishing at her feet.

“I am sorry.” Sophie sat down on the sofa next to Elizabeth. “I’m having difficulties with Lady Cantwell today. She overexerted herself and needs to rest before returning home.”

“Oh,” Elizabeth said with disappointment. “Would you like me to come back later?”

“No,” Sophie said, waving her hand at her in dismissal. “Lady Cantwell will be fine. She just needs a few moments to catch her breath. I left a servant to attend to her needs. I could sense you needed me more.”

“It’s awful, Sophie.” Elizabeth blurted out the story that Caroline had told them. She stared at the ornate rug on the floor. A fire burned across her cheeks heating them with shame. How did she get into this mess?

“This is a dreadful situation.” Sophie frowned and glanced away for a moment.

“Is there anything you can do?” Elizabeth asked.

“Me?”

“Is there any way you can tell with your powers if what Caroline said is the truth?”

Sophie fell silent and stared at the empty fireplace. Finally, she answered, “I am sorry, Elizabeth. If your mother had intense feelings for the man, I might be able to read that from an object. Perhaps even getting a mental image like a portrait.”

Before Elizabeth could ask her next question, Sophie continued, “But it would need to be a very important object. Something that he gave her or something that she poured her feelings into.”

“Like the diary,” Elizabeth said, deflated.

“Exactly.” Sophie stopped and looked away from Elizabeth again.

“What aren’t you telling me, Sophie?”

Sophie sighed. “If your mother did not have intense feelings for this man, I might not be able to tell you anything.”

Elizabeth sat back against the chair. “What do you mean? My mother would have had strong feelings for this man. They made love!”

“Elizabeth,” Sophie said quietly. “We both know that many women among the
ton
have affairs for nothing more than physical enjoyment.”

She could not be speaking of her mother! “That may be, but my mother was not one of them. She constantly warned me about the hazards of courtship. About the importance of finding a man who loved me, and whom I loved in return. She cautioned me against infidelities and the problems…” Elizabeth’s voice trailed off as she realized that all her mother’s warnings might have come from her own experiences.

Sophie nodded. “Elizabeth, we have no way of knowing how your mother felt for this man. She might have loved him with all her heart.”

“Or she might not have loved him at all,” Elizabeth muttered. “Will suggested I speak with some ladies close to her age.”

“That is a wise idea.”

“I thought I might try Lady Selby first. I know they were friends, but I’m not certain how close,” Elizabeth said.

“Even if she wasn’t close with your mother, she might know other women who were.” Sophie stopped as her footman brought in a tray of tea. She poured the tea and handed Elizabeth a cup.

Elizabeth waited for the footman to leave before she asked the most pressing question. “What if it is true, Sophie?”

Sophie sat back and sipped her tea. “Then you must pray very hard that you are not with child. Because if you are, you will have no choice but to leave London, and most likely England as well.”

Elizabeth’s mouth gaped. She hadn’t really thought about the consequences of being with child other than the gossip. Everyone would know he was the father and if the story became public, she would be completely disgraced. Sophie was right. Elizabeth would be forced to leave England forever. She would never see Will again, or her home or her friends. Where could she possibly go on her small allowance?

The sound of a cane hitting the marble floor made her look up. Lady Cantwell stopped at the doorway and looked in.

“Miss Reynard, thank you again for the reading and letting me rest.”

Sophie rose and went to her client. She clasped the older lady’s gnarled hands and held them tight. “You are most welcome, Lady Cantwell.”

Lady Cantwell moved slightly and then walked into the salon. “And you, Lady Elizabeth.”

“Me?” Elizabeth squeaked.

“I have told you before, when you are ready to learn about your family to come to me. But do not come alone. The duke needs to know his family history, too.”

Elizabeth felt a bit confused. “I already know about my family.”

Lady Cantwell leveled a disapproving look. “No, my dear, there is much you do not know.”

“Are you speaking of my father?” Elizabeth whispered.

“And your mother.” Lady Cantwell ambled out of the room and left the house. Elizabeth stood staring at the empty room. Could Lady Cantwell know who her father was?

“That woman is slightly mad,” Sophie said.

“I think she might know who my father was,” Elizabeth replied.

“Elizabeth, you know she is one of the worst gossips amongst the
ton
.”

“I do know that.” Elizabeth looked into her friend’s gray eyes. “But what if she does know? She might be my only chance.”

“Or she might be your complete and utter downfall.”