Stanton Unconditional (27 page)

My eyes widen. “Oh,” I whisper.

“Yes, oh,” he smiles. He lifts me and pulls me over his lap to straddle him and starts to rub me over him again as he kisses me deeply. His pants are open and he is free.

“I haven’t had sex with a condom since I was seventeen,” I say quietly.

He pulls back and he looks at me tenderly.

I give him a bashful smile. I’m embarrassed I just said that out loud. I just cemented how inexperienced I am. He kisses me again more urgently and rips my underpants off and throws them on the floor and then he lifts me over him.

“Josh … I can’t take you like this straight up. You know that,” I whisper as I start to panic.

“Shut up and fuck me,” he snaps and he slams me down onto him with his hands on my shoulders. I cry out from the shock of the overwhelming fullness and my head throws back. Shit … ok, I am … He lifts me and slams me back down and my legs open further as I feel myself moisten and open for him as he slides in as far as he can go.

My eyes widen and his eyes darken. “That’s it baby, take me … feels good doesn’t it?” He grinds out, his mouth is open and slack as his eyes drop to my lips.

He grabs my waist and waits for me to adjust to the overwhelming sensation as he pants, trying to control himself from moving. My heart is racing out of control. This is what I need, for him to take me uninhibited without concern for being gentle, being quiet or being committed. I kiss him roughly and mouth the words, “Fuck me.” His eyes roll back in his head and he really starts to move me as his hands grab my shoulders for leverage from behind. He’s so hard, so deep … and so damn hot. He’s completely taking me over and there is not a damn thing I can do about it. I close my eyes as I try to deal with the intense punishing rhythm. “Your beautiful cunt is so tight around my cock. Can you feel it?” he growls as his hips work at a piston pace.

“You feel so good. Fill me, harder, faster,” I cry.

He seems to lose control as he stands suddenly, lifts me and pushes me against the wall. His hips are now pumping into me at such a fast pace all I can do is hang on. Oh god, my head is against the wall and he is taking me hard, ripping into me as his body starts to drip with sweat. He drops his head to my shoulder and groans from his stomach as he jerks in orgasm while he breathes heavily into my neck. We stay still, lost in the moment. The connection between us is so intense I can hardly breathe. I tenderly pull his face back to mine and kiss him gently as once again the emotion I feel for this man nearly brings me to tears.

“I love you,” I whisper through glassy eyes.

His haunted eyes meet mine and I frown. What was that look? Why did he look at me like that?

“Baby, what’s wrong?” I whisper as I gasp for breath.

He shakes his head and drops it to my shoulder again as he appears to try and compose himself. What the hell is going on here?

“Nothing’s wrong, presh, that’s what’s wrong,” he says sadly.

I frown as I try to understand the meaning of that statement.

He gently pulls out of me, eases my feet to the ground and he kisses me again.

Trying to erase the last twenty seconds, I smile. “Shower?”

He smiles broadly. “Are you feeling dirty, my beautiful slut?”

I smile shyly. “As a matter of fact, Mr Stanton, I am.”

I slowly wake to the sound of heavy breathing. Joshua is out cold next to me. Having sex for hours will do that to a man. He must be exhausted. I know I am. I sleepily trudge to the bathroom and return to the bed and lie down. Joshua throws his arm over my stomach and he leans over and kisses me while his eyes stay closed.

“Morning, beautiful,” he sighs sleepily.

I lean in and kiss his cheek. “Morning,” I smile.

He rolls to his side and winces, still with his eyes closed. “Shit … you must be sore.”

I giggle. “Yes, some sex fiend took his liberties from my body all night.”

With his eyes still closed, he smiles, grabs my behind and pulls me into him. “Yeah, well, you did put out the invitation to the party with that outfit.”

I giggle again and he kisses the top of my head. “What time is it?” he asks.

I shrug. “About nine I think.”

“Hmm,” he groans. “I have to get up.”

“Why?” I frown. “It’s Saturday. Can’t we stay in bed all day?”

He opens his eyes for the first time and smiles. “I wish, I have to train.”

I really am over this work-out shit. “You don’t have to train. I am making you breakfast, then I’m taking a shower with you and then when I want to go back to bed for a sleep you can go to the gym.” I smile sweetly.

He smirks. “Not happening, I’m going in twenty minutes.” He hops up slowly and walks to the shower.

I lie on my back. “Take note, I just put out an invitation and I got a decline,” I yell.

He calls back from the bathroom. “Not a decline, just a raincheck.” I roll my eyes, same shit.

I make my way to the kitchen and start to make my coffee. I need to ask him about that comment last night. It’s weighing heavily on my mind. Joshua walks through my apartment with a towel around his waist and opens up the front door. A bag is sitting outside waiting for him. Who put it there and why do I keep forgetting about those bloody bodyguards lurking around my apartment? He scoops it up and saunters back to my room as he smirks at me. Hmm what did he say again? I narrow my eyes as I try to think of the exact wording,
nothing is wrong that’s what’s wrong.
What in the hell does that mean? Does he want something to be wrong between us—haven’t we had enough wrong? I’m ready for right. I make him a protein shake, put some toast in the toaster and pour our coffee while deep in thought. How am I going to handle this? I can demand an explanation or I can try and work it out in time. Maybe he didn’t mean it. Five minutes later he walks out in a pale blue singlet and black sports shorts and runners. I hand him his shake.

He raises his eyebrows and smiles broadly. “Good service.” He gives me a wink as he takes a sip.

I turn and start to butter the toast and he sits on the stool at the bench.

“What did you mean by that comment last night Josh?” I ask as I turn. Oh great, just blurt it out why don’t you, so much for not saying anything. Idiot.

“What comment?”

“Nothing is wrong, that’s what is wrong,” I ask as I raise an eyebrow.

“Tash don’t, I’m not in the mood for this shit today.” He shakes his head in frustration.

I frown. “What does that mean?”

“It means I don’t want to talk about it—it was nothing.”

I give him a small smile as unease starts to fill me. He’s giving me mixed signals again.

We sit in silence for a while. “What are you doing today?” he asks.

I shrug. “Nothing really, grocery shopping and washing. I am going to the hospital this afternoon.”

He nods as he drinks his shake.

“Do you want me to invite Cam and Adrian over with the girls for dinner. I can cook,”

I ask as I give him a hopeful smile.

He shakes his head. “No,” he replies flatly.

“Oh.” My face drops.

He smirks sexily at me. “I want you,” he tucks my hair behind my ear, “to cook me dinner and then put that edible white nightdress on and spoon on the lounge with me while we watch the game in peace. I want you to myself.”

I smile broadly as relief fills me. “You do?”

He stands and kisses me gently as he brushes his fingers down my face. “I do. I will meet you at the hospital about four then?” he asks softly.

“Ok, sounds good.” I give him a weak smile but as he disappears, I stare at the closed door he has just exited through. What’s going on with me? Why do I once again feel insecure?

I sit in the car in the hospital car park waiting for Bridget to arrive. I didn’t want to risk being alone with Margaret. I’m such a wimp. I know I have to tell him … but when is the right time? I don’t even know what’s going on between us, without adding paternity into the mix. Joshua’s car procession comes around the corner and I smile. I watch in slow motion as he gets out of the car and walks around and leans on the bonnet as he speaks. His body language is tense—who is he talking to? He seems stressed as he hangs up. He then immediately dials a number as he stands legs wide and one hand on his hip. My eyes flick to the security behind me and I see one of them answer the phone. Joshua has just rung them—he is keeping tabs on me. He does know I went to lunch with Jesten … shit, shit, shit. His eyes scan the car park until they find my car and he smiles and makes his way to my car as I slowly get out of it.

“Miss Marx.” He smiles as he kisses me gently on the cheek.

I smile nervously as my eyes flick to the ten men surrounding us. “Hi,” I answer quietly.

“What are you doing out here?” he asks as we turn and start walking into the hospital, the guards dropping behind us as he takes my hand in his.

“I was waiting for Bridget,” I answer.

Cameron has been waiting there. “Hey Tash,” he smiles.

“Hi Cam.”

We walk silently into the hospital, hand in hand, and then into the lift where the security drop behind.

“You guys are coming out tonight yeah?” Cameron asks.

“No,” Joshua answers flatly. “We’re staying at home.” He picks my hand up that he is holding and kisses the back of it again and I find myself melting at his feet. Maybe I am just imagining the mixed signals thing?

Cameron screws up his face. “Oh god, how boring staying home on a Saturday night.” “I suppose it depends on who you are staying home with. Staying home with Natasha is anything but boring.” Joshua smirks and I smile like a little kid—this man really is divine.

“I’m going out with Abbie and Didge then,” Cameron says flatly.

“I think Didge has a date,” I answer.

Cameron raises both of his eyebrows at Joshua as he smirks. “Looks like it’s just me and Abbie then.”

Joshua shakes his head. “No,” he says flatly.

I giggle.

Cameron screws up his face. “What do you mean no?” he asks affronted as he puts his hands on his hips.

“I’ve told you not to touch her,” Joshua snaps as the lift door opens and he pulls me through the door by the hand.

“I will do what I want,” Cameron smirks. “To who I want. And she will fucking love it just quietly.”

I smile and Joshua rolls his eyes as he drops my hand like a hot potato. Huh? I look up to see why he has just dropped my hand and I see his mother standing at the end of the hall looking down at us as we approach. He obviously still hasn’t bloody told her about us.

I walk to the lounge area and take a seat opposite Joshua and Bridget comes up in a rush.

“Oh, guys, they just put a sign up in reception. There has been a car accident and they need someone with blood type AB– at the children’s ward immediately. Does anyone know of anyone with that blood type? Apparently it’s rare.”

My eyes snap up to Joshua and I stare at him, shit. My eyes nervously glance over to Cameron. He narrows his eyes in return as he folds his arms and leans back onto the wall. Holy fuck, that’s Joshua’s blood type … should I say something? No, let Cameron say something. For ten minutes I sit silently next to Joshua, praying for him to remember his blood type. How can someone so smart not even remember his blood type? What am I going to do? If I don’t tell him a child could die and I already know that less than two per cent of the population have this type of blood—the chances of finding some immediately are slim to none. Why isn’t Cameron saying something? Maybe he doesn’t know? No, he knows alright. Shit.

I sit and listen to Bridget and Joshua talking about some hotel in France that they have both gone to but my mind is in overdrive.

Time is ticking and I am starting to sweat. I start to fidget in my chair and try to work out what to do. My eyes flick to Cameron who is sitting as calm as anything, watching me. What’s he watching?

I have no choice. I have to say something. “Joshua, I think that is your blood type, baby,” I whisper to him.

He frowns at me. “What?” he asks.

I swallow the nervous lump in my throat. “The child that needs blood has the same rare blood as you.”

Joshua frowns and looks at Cameron who is staring at me blank-faced … oh crap.

“She’s right, it is your blood type. We had better go to the children’s ward.”

Joshua shrugs and stands immediately and Cameron stands. “I’ll come with you.” His eyes flick to me. “Natasha, come with us.”

Oh shit, no way am I going. “No, I will wait for you here.”

Cameron narrows his eyes at me. “I insist.” He fakes a smile at me and holds out his hand. I swallow again and look at his outstretched hand. Now I’ve done it. I stand and follow the two boys down the corridor in silence. We get to the children’s ward.

“Hello, I’m a doctor and my brother here has blood type AB– I understand you need a donation.”

The nurse puts her hand on her chest in relief. “Oh thank god, yes please come this way.” She ushers Joshua away down the hall.

Cameron turns to me. “What do you know, Natasha, and I want the fucking truth.”

Chapter 23

C
ameron’s fierce eyes
meet mine. “Well?”

I swallow uncomfortably,
holy mother of god
. “What do you mean Cameron?” I ask as I step back from him defensively.

“I mean … how do you know Joshua’s blood type?” he snaps.

I frown at him. “I looked on his chart in the hospital. How did you think I knew? What’s this about?”

He narrows his eyes at me and steps back as he seems to regain his composure. “Nothing … I’m just having a weird day.” He runs his hands through his hair in frustration as he shakes his head.

“Cameron, if something is wrong involving Joshua I would like to know about it,” I question.

He studies my face as he assesses me. “Like I said, nothing is wrong. I’m going back to the room to see Gran. I will see you up there.” With that he leaves the room in a rush.

Hmm, ok, I rub my eyes in frustration. Shit, that was close. I’m starting to perspire from nerves. Cameron is onto something and I need to find out just exactly what that is and what the hell I am going to do about it.

I sit in the hospital room as the nurses prepare to take the blood, my mind in a rush. Max just called me to let me know that Coby Allender has been googling Natasha from his computer in jail … what does that mean? Who is this nut job and what does he want? His trial is on Wednesday and the word is that the police don’t have enough evidence to prove he committed the murders but they know he did it. More than likely he will get an innocent verdict in court. Is Natasha in danger if he gets out? Max seems to think that she is. My stomach churns. This is another total mess that I don’t have time for.

Natasha walks into the consultation room and smiles at me warmly. That’s all it takes to make me weak … and calm. Her beautiful smile complete with those dimples. “Are you ok?” she whispers as she gently kisses my cheek and runs her hand over my hair.

“I am now,” I smile. Why does she make me so needy? I take her hand in mine.

“How did you know I had this type of blood?” I ask.

“I saw it on your chart in the hospital in LA.” She kisses me again.

I nod and she sits quietly in the chair in the corner of the room. “Is the child going to be ok?” she asks.

I nod. “I think so, they take the blood and screen it and then give it to him.”

The nurse walks back in the room and starts to prepare to take the blood and we both sit silently watching her. My eyes linger on my beautiful girl who is deep in concentration watching the nurse. She pulls her glasses from her bag so she can see what is going on and I smile at her.

“What?” she mouths as she smirks.

I shake my head. I’ve never known a woman who is so damn sexy in glasses. Her intelligence is a huge trigger to my libido.

Ten minutes later we have finished and are walking back to the room, and we stop off to get a coffee from the cafeteria. The fawning of the girls behind the counter is actually getting embarrassing. It’s ok when Cam is here because he loves to flirt but I just find it downright embarrassing when he’s not there.

“Hello, Joshua,” one of the girls coos.

I smile and nod as I dip my head. “Hello,” I reply. They all giggle.

Natasha looks at me deadpan. “How does she know your name?” She raises an eyebrow as she folds her arms in front of her.

I smirk. “Because she puts it on my coffee every day,” I answer.

Natasha screws up her face at me. “I bet she does.” She puts a finger in her mouth to symbolise she’s going to be sick and I give her a wink. I love it when she gets jealous.

“Must be that penis in my pants,” I smirk as I raise my eyebrow in jest.

“Hmm, you mean the one I am just about to cut off as an optional extra,” she whispers as she looks around in annoyance.

“Or suck,” I whisper back as I lean in and kiss her cheek.

“No. Not happening, no sucking tonight, Stanton,” she smirks as she takes a seat.

“We’ll see,” I smile.

We wait for our coffee in silence, her phone is on the table and beeps a message at the same time she goes to get the coffees from the counter. I read it—it’s from someone called Jes.

I’m at the gym and haven’t seen you for forever.
I’m coming over to yours tonight.

She comes back and sits down with our coffees. “Jes messaged you and she’s coming over tonight,” I remark as I take my coffee from her hand.

“Huh?” She frowns as she looks at her phone.

“Your friend Jes texted.”

She snatches the phone from the table as she sits and reads the message. “Huh, so she is, fancy that.” She takes a large gulp of her coffee and then spits it onto the table.

“Fucking fishface makes the coffee too fucking hot,” she snaps as she grabs a serviette and wipes her mouth.

I laugh out loud. “Fishface, who is fishface?”

“The idiot behind the counter who looks like a fish,” she stammers with the napkin over her face as she looks around in embarrassment.

I can’t help it, I laugh out loud again.

“My tongue has third-degree burns from that bitch,” she stammers. “Surely you don’t have to ask for coffee to be at a drinkable temperature, now do you?”

I shrug. “Mine’s fine.”

“Yes, well you’re good-looking with a penis. We already know that,” she mutters as she wipes the table.

“What time is your friend coming over?” I ask. “Do I know her?”

Her eyes meet mine. “No, not really. I’m going to text her and tell her not to come. I want you to myself.”

She starts to text and I feel a contentment sweep over me as I lean back in my chair and drink my coffee. Bridget walks in and over to us.

“Don’t get the coffee unless you want a tongue transplant,” Natasha snaps as she keeps texting.

Bridget laughs. “Mmm, fishface to the rescue again hey.”

I raise my eyebrows as I smirk again. “You call her fishface as well?” I ask.

“With those silicone lips that title is well deserved,” Bridget mutters as she searches for her wallet in her handbag.

“Who are you texting?” Bridget asks Natasha.

“Umm, you know Jes my girlfriend from work.”

Bridget frowns. “No.”

“Don’t worry then,” Natasha snaps as she puts her phone onto the table. She glares at Bridget.

“For god’s sake, go and tell her the coffee is too hot if it’s that much of an issue,” Bridget sighs.

My phone rings. It’s Murph and I answer. “Hello.”

“We got a problem.”

I frown. “We do?” I ask as I sit in my chair.

“Hooker says she is sending the email tonight to Natasha if you don’t ring her immediately.”

My eyes flick to the girls who are deep in discussion and I stand and walk over to the window.

“What do you mean?” I answer angrily. “I don’t want to speak to her.” I look back towards

the girls to ensure they can’t hear what is being said.

“Yes I know,” he answers quietly.

“I thought you said you were handling this,” I whisper angrily as my blood pressure rises.

“Look, I think we should go to the police,” he says flatly.

I frown and look out the window and into the car park below. “It will be too late then. I’m warning you Adrian if Natasha sees this tape someone is going to die,” I whisper angrily as I look around again.

He stays silent as he thinks.

“Well what do you want to do then?” he asks.

I try to think of a solution. “Hack Natasha’s email and crash the system to give me time to think.”

“I don’t know how to do that.”

“Get someone else to fucking do it then,” I snap as my angry eyes glare at Ben who is standing at the back of the cafeteria. He frowns in question.

“I think the less people who know about this the better. You had better come back here and do it yourself,” Adrian asserts.

I roll my eyes in frustration. “Fine. See you soon.” I hang up angrily and turn to see Tash and Didge still deep in discussion. What in the hell am I going to say about where I am going? I have just told her I want to stay home alone with her tonight.

Ben walks over to me. “Is everything ok?” he asks.

I glare at him. “No, everything is not ok,” I whisper. “Because of your staff’s incompetence the hooker is sending the email to Natasha tonight.” I rub my forehead in frustration.

His eyes widen.

“Ben, I will say this once, if Natasha sees the tape someone’s head is going to roll.”

He shakes his head in frustration. “Josh, I don’t know what to say. I don’t know how this has happened.”

“Do I need to remind you?” I snap angrily and walk back to the girls. I take a seat back at the table and my eyes linger on Natasha’s beautiful face with my heart pounding in my chest. Maybe I should just tell her.

Natasha smiles and takes my hand over the table and I feel myself melt a little.

“How’s your tongue?” I smirk.

“Burnt to oblivion,” she replies flatly.

I smile. I can’t tell her. Who am I kidding? I need to find out her email addresses so I can hack the systems. How in the hell am I going to do that? This is abysmal.

I need to speak to Cameron. He’ll think of something, he always does. “I’m going to go back upstairs. I will meet you up there,” I say as I squeeze Natasha’s hand across the table and she smiles.

“Ok, see you up there,” she replies.

I stand and leave the cafeteria. I need to find Cameron … and fast.

I watch Joshua leave the cafeteria followed by his security team. “Oh my god Bridget, this is a disaster,” I stammer as I grab her arm over the table.

She frowns. “What is?”

“Jesten, that’s who. He texted me, and Josh read the text and now I have lied to Joshua and he thinks Jes is a girl.”

She rolls her eyes as she drinks her coffee. “Just tell Jes you are back with Josh, easy.” “I’m going to eventually, but they are fighting each other next week in the stupid cage- fighting shit and Jesten will bait Joshua even more if he knows that we are back together and we both know Joshua will kill Jesten even harder if he knows we are friends now,” I stammer, exasperated.

She screws up her face in disgust. “I’m too tired for this shit and you can’t kill someone harder. If they are dead they are dead.”

I put my head into my hands on the table. “Why hasn’t he texted back? What if he just turns up at my house?” I whisper, mortified.

She smiles broadly at me. “That would actually be funny though, wouldn’t it?”

I glare at her. “No, not at all.”

“Imagine if Joshua answers the door, like in a towel and it’s Jesten, what do you think

would happen?” She smiles.

I put my hand over my mouth as the horrific scene unfolds in my head.

I take my phone back out of my bag and text Jesten again.

Matter of urgency.
I’m at work all weekend.
I will call you on Monday.

My heart rate has picked up and I am starting to sweat. “Why isn’t he texting me back so I know he got the message, the idiot,” I snap

“Because he thinks you are at work. Chill out for Pete’s sake.” Bridget rolls her eyes at me. “I think Abbie is breaking up with Tristan tonight.”

My face falls. “Why? They have been getting on so well.”

Bridget shrugs. “She thinks she isn’t ready to settle down and Tristan is the kind of guy you marry and have kids with.”

“Shit,” I whisper. “That’s shitty, poor Tristan.”

“She’s an idiot, someone else will snap him up and she’ll lose him.” She sighs.

I shrug. “Who knows, I think if you are meant to be you will always find a way back to each other.” I smile.

Bridget narrows her eyes at me. “That’s romantic bullshit and you know it.”

“Josh and I have always found our way back to each other.” I shrug.

“Hey on that note has he told you he loves you yet?” Bridget questions with a raised brow.

I sip my coffee. “No, it’s a noticeably absent comment in our conversations.”

She nods as she sips her coffee. “But you’ve told him.”

“Yes, every day,” I mutter.

“Hmm,” she says flatly.

“Look it’s only been a week and I am not pushing for the sentence because I already know he has feelings for me. I can feel it.”

“I hope you’re not being deluded and he’s using you for sex,” she sighs.

I drink the last of my coffee. That thought has crossed my mind more than once. “Me too.”

We make our way back upstairs and see Joshua and Cameron sitting in the lounge area, both scrolling through their phones. Josh’s eyes flick up and he pats the chair next to him. I smile and take it. I watch Cameron to try and see if there is any indication that he knows about Joshua’s paternity. What am I going to do about this? That was close downstairs. If Cameron is onto this and I think he is then it will only be a matter of time before Joshua finds out. My stomach drops at the thought that his mother may very well implicate me in this mess.

“Tash, I have a friend who is after an internship at your hospital. She wants to know if you would pass on her resume. Can I email it to you?” Cameron asks.

Huh, umm. “Yes of course,” I mutter, distracted.

“What’s your email address for work?” he asks. Joshua doesn’t look up and keeps scrolling through his phone.

I shuffle through my bag and dig out my purse to retrieve a business card. “I don’t even know it, it’s on here.” I pass Cameron the card and he takes it and puts it in his wallet.

“Thanks.” He smiles. “Josh, what time are we training at the gym?” he asks.

“Straight after here,” Joshua answers.

I frown. “I thought you trained this morning.”

He smiles and puts his hand affectionately on my leg. “I did, presh, but I am doing a bit tonight with Cam and Murph. I won’t be long.”

I roll my eyes. “Aren’t you over the gym? Doesn’t it get boring?”

He smiles warmly at me. “I won’t be long.” He stands. “I will see you soon.” He bends and gently kisses my cheek.

“Ok,” I sigh. This may be good anyway because I can try to sort out frigging Jesten. Bridget smirks at me and I narrow my eyes at her. “What?” I mouth.

“You and your flaming vagina.” She giggles.

“Come on, as soon as we see Gran you are going to help me find Jesten.”