Staying Strong: 365 Days a Year (13 page)

August 10

You have to learn how to communicate if you want to get along in this world.

When you learn how to communicate with others there’s no problem you can’t solve. It doesn’t mean you’ll always agree with other people and it certainly doesn’t mean that they will agree with you. But none of that matters if you possess the maturity and the patience to work through your differences. Think about how much more peace there would be on this planet if people would just talk through a problem instead of using violence.

Goal:
Do you have a friend or family member you have a really hard time getting through to? Maybe now is the time to try again. It never hurts to try.

August 11

So the moral of the story is, who are you to judge? There’s only one true judge and that’s God. So chill and let my Father do His job.

—SALT-N-PEPA, “NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS”

Don’t waste your time judging other people, it’s not your place. You weren’t put here to judge others. You are here to be the best version of yourself that you can be and to spread love and kindness to everyone you meet.

Goal:
Do not judge other people, use your time making a difference.

August 12

If we are to live together in peace we must know each other better.

—LYNDON JOHNSON

We all share space on this planet, so we have to come to a place of mutual respect so we can get along. We don’t all have to agree with each other but we have to respect and honor our differences and similarities alike.

Goal:
Reach out to your colleague, roommate, coworker, or new acquaintance and make an effort to get to know them a little better. You might be surprised how much you have in common or how touched they are by your effort.

August 13

Those who cause suffering are often the ones suffering the most.

When I was bullied as a teenager, I felt a lot of anger about the way people treated me. Now I understand that those people were suffering as much as I was but expressing it in different ways. When I think about the bullies today, it may sound crazy, but I want to hug them because I know they were in need of love and compassion at that time.

Goal:
Think about one person today who has hurt you in the past. Have compassion, for they were obviously in pain themselves.

August 14

You teach people how to treat you by what you allow, what you stop, and what you reinforce.

—TONY GASKINS

If you’re an outgoing person, it’s important to remember that not everyone is that way. We should all be sensitive to others and what they’re comfortable with. Be cautious of other people’s boundaries. If anyone starts to cross yours, tell them to please respect them. There have been anxious times in my life where people are trying to pull at me, and I’ve had to set boundaries or walk away from situations.

Goal:
Be aware and considerate of other people’s boundaries. Just because you are comfortable acting a certain way, doesn’t mean another person is okay with it.

August 15

Have compassion for all beings, rich and poor alike; each has their suffering. Some suffer too much, others too little.

—BUDDHA

Oftentimes when we compare our struggles to others’, we end up feeling guilty and accidentally invalidate our own feelings. When I broke my ankle, it really sucked, but I realized someone on the other side of the world may not even have fresh water. Sometimes we instantly shame ourselves because someone is in more pain than we are, but all pain needs to be acknowledged because it’s real. And just because you haven’t had as much as another doesn’t mean you haven’t struggled.

Goal:
Whatever you are going through, make sure you validate how you are feeling. Value and respect your emotions as if they were someone else’s.

August 16

Don’t compare yourself to anyone else, you are doing yourself the greatest disservice.

No two people are alike—that is what makes each and every one of us so magnificent and special. It’s human nature to judge ourselves, to judge others, and when we’re feeling insecure we start comparing ourselves to other people. We think about whether someone has more money than we do, whether someone is prettier or more talented than we are. But it just doesn’t matter because that person isn’t you and they never will be. You were created exactly as you were meant to be.

Goal:
Remember, there is nobody else on this earth who has the heart that you have, and that itself is worth treasuring.

August 17

Let every feeling happen to you Beauty and terror Just keep going No feeling is final.

—RAINER MARIA RILKE

When we are deep in one particular feeling we often think it will last forever. The trick is not resisting that emotion because that just causes more pain and suffering. We are here on this earth to feel a range of emotions: beauty and terror, sorrow and bliss, laughter and sadness. You can’t control every emotion you go through so it’s important to just let the experiences happen knowing that they won’t last forever.

Goal:
Remember, pain is a part of life. It helps us appreciate the happier times.

August 18

Either you run the day or the day runs you.

—JIM ROHN

When you wake up in a bad mood it seems to always color your day and if you don’t catch it in time you will start to feel like your whole day is doomed. Believe it or not, you have the power to change your mood and decide to not let one bad thought or feeling ruin your whole day. I’m not saying it’s always easy because I know it can be tough. Give it a try and see what kind of positivity and light you can bring in.

Goal:
Exercise the laws of attraction today. No matter what happens to you, keep sending out good energy to the universe and see what it brings back for you.

August 19

Do small things with great love.

—MOTHER TERESA

As long as you do everything in your life with all your heart your impact will be more profound than you could ever imagine.

Goal:
Even the smaller tasks in life deserve all your heart. Something as simple as a hug or saying “thank you” should be given the same level of love and care as bigger actions.

August 20

Even miracles take time.

—
CINDERELLA

As children we believed that wishes could come true with the flick of a wand or the snap of a finger. It’s not to say that wonderful things can’t happen quickly, but more often than not, miraculous things take time. I truly believe that miracles can happen. With that faith I am provided with the strength to continue to stay strong.

Goal:
Have patience. Even the great changes in our lives need time to occur.

August 21

You don’t owe anybody the present other than yourself. Take time for you. Respect yourself and your privacy. Set boundaries.

So many of the lessons I’ve learned have been about standing up for myself and setting boundaries. It’s really hard and sometimes even painful. In work environments and everyday life, be sure to set boundaries for those you’re spending time with. Make sure they’re aware with what you’re comfortable with and your limitations. Take action and communicate with others to make sure you are honoring yourself. It’s hard, but it’s worth it.

Goal:
Set one boundary today in your professional or personal life.

August 22

Thanks to my mother I haven’t wasted any time dwelling on whether I’m brilliant or a fool. It’s completely unprofitable to think about it.

—WOODY ALLEN

You could spend your entire lifetime worrying what other people think of you but then you would have wasted all your life’s energy doing nothing but worrying about things that you have no control over. It really doesn’t matter what others think of you. You can’t be liked by everybody and that’s not why we were put on this earth. What matters is that you can go to sleep at night knowing you did your best and acted with kindness, honesty, and compassion for others and for yourself.

Goal:
Spend your days wisely, focus on what matters, not on silly things you can’t control, or they will end up controlling you.

August 23

Find your purpose, find your voice.

We’re all here on this earth for a reason. Some of us know when we are very young what we want to become, and some of us may need more time to discover themselves. No matter when you discover your future, you have a specific purpose on this earth. Your voice is unique and beautiful. When you find out what makes you happy, embrace it and never let anyone tell you that you can’t live your dreams.

Goal:
List everything you want to accomplish in life. It doesn’t matter how big the dream sounds, the bigger the better.

August 24

Live with no regrets.

—UNKNOWN

Nobody is perfect. Equally important is knowing how to forgive yourself. Do not obsess over your past mistakes. The more you obsess and hold on to it, the more energy and power you give it. So let it go, learn from it, and move on.

Goal:
Forgive yourself for a mistake you made or something you’ve done that you now regret. Allow yourself to let it go.

August 25

In the end only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you.

—BUDDHA

Why is it that we spend more time obsessing about the one thing that we didn’t get instead of all the wonderful things in our lives? Consider the possibility that the one thing you wanted so badly that slipped away just wasn’t meant for you. Instead look around and be grateful for all the love and blessings you have right now.

Goal:
Think about something you really wanted but never got that turned out to be a blessing in disguise.

August 26

When you do your best and live out your dreams, you inspire others to do the same.

The more energy you spend living your dreams, the more that energy will spread to other people. Your courage to live your dreams will give people courage, inspiration, and freedom to start living out their own dreams. You’re a living example of what some people feel is impossible. There’s no greater gift you could give someone like that.

Goal:
If you’re feeling fearful or uninspired about your dreams, spend time with a friend who is motivated and draw inspiration.

August 27

Hold faithfulness and sincerity as first principles.

—CONFUCIUS

Sincerity and faithfulness are two of the most fundamental values in life. Without these ideals the world loses its meaning. Every day I try my best to be genuine to myself, my friends, my family, and my fans.

Goal:
What are your values? Make sure your daily actions align with your morals and belief system.

August 28

You will never do anything in this world without courage. It is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor.

—ARISTOTLE

We don’t give ourselves enough credit for all the courage we have inside ourselves. Perhaps some have more than others, but at the end of the day, even if you tried and failed, you have already won. You tried and that takes more courage than anything else.

Goal:
Do your very best in everything you do today.

August 29

You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months overanalyzing a situation, trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve, would’ve happened . . . or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move on.

—TUPAC

If you spend your thoughts and days living in the past, you will find you aren’t happy because you’re missing out on all the joy and wonder in the present. Zone in on this moment right now. Focus on your breathing and be thankful for where you are. We tend to look in the past and future when our joy is actually right under our nose.

Goal:
If you spend too much time living in the past, you aren’t able to live in the now. Make an effort to move forward today.

August 30

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it on living someone else’s life.

—STEVE JOBS

As I started gaining success as an artist I would use the level of that success to measure my own happiness. But as I continued on this path I realized that there were so many ups and downs. I would never be happy with myself if I allowed other people’s perceptions and opinions to define who I am. I’m so thankful that I have the strength and self-love to handle my highs and lows.

Goal:
Find YOUR strength in self-love. And don’t let other people’s opinions define you.

August 31

Give what you want to receive. If you want happiness, make others happy.

—RUSSELL SIMMONS

It’s a simple law of attraction that you get back what you put out into the universe. The more love you give, the more love you attract. The more love you attract, the more love you receive. When we put good energy into the world, we feel good. We make those around us feel good.

Goal:
Be a shining example of every value and ideal you hold dear to your heart.