Surrender: Keeping Her in the Dark Vol. 4 (24 page)

“Hard day at work?” I put the paper down.

“Ah, typical day. I made some calls, answered some calls, ran some errands,” she trailed off. I sat up and moved to my knees.

“I’m hungry,” I whispered.

“Dinner’s almost ready,” she closed her eyes.

“I don’t want to wait,” I grabbed her legs and moved her in front of me. I pushed her legs over my shoulders and pulled her panties to the side. “I need to eat now,” I said as I dove in.

“Really?” she huffed.

Her body moved with my mouth. I licked her up and down, pushed two fingers inside her, and sucked on her clit. I moved my tongue against her and pressed her against my face. She tasted so good. She always tasted so good.

I grunted and hummed. I tried to listen to her moans but she wasn’t making any. She moved her body and arched her back and even touched the back of my head. But she didn’t make any sound. It wasn’t like her.

“Are you ok?” I mumbled against her skin. She moved away from me. She never did that either, unless she was already coming.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” She raised herself up and re-adjusted her skirt. “I’m just,” but she didn’t even finish her sentence. She just stood up and walked out to the dining room.

She was quiet during dinner. We made chit chat, but again I chose to ignore the problem.

She talked about an up and coming event she was planning and I talked about another merger of mine. Just like everything was normal.

“How is it being back at work?” she asked.

“It’s fine. It’s better than being here,” I said and she gave me a weird look. “You know what I mean,” I said.

“No, I don’t think I do,” she said. She was a little pissed off.

“Not you, Norah. I mean,” I took a deep breath. “Everything here reminds me of him,” I said. “Work is work.” She nodded like she understood.

“Norah,” I said to her and she looked up at me. “It has nothing to do with you. I mean it,” she nodded again.

She went to the kitchen after dinner and started washing dishes. I walked up behind her and ran my hands over her ass.

“Let’s go upstairs,” I said in her ear. “I don’t care if it takes me all night, I’m going to make you come,” I leaned forward and turned off the water.

Norah

Liam gripped the back of my head with one hand and my throat with the other as he kept pounding away at me. It had been over an hour and we had done everything possible in every possible position. It wasn’t gonna happen and we both knew it.

“Liam, stop, please. We have to stop. It isn’t going to happen,” I panted. He thrust inside me one last time and then let me go. I fell straight into the bed and he withdrew himself from me and backed away. I could hear him panting behind me.

“I’m sorry. It’s starting to hurt,” I said.

I crawled on the bed and grabbed my underwear and t-shirt. I started to get dressed. I wanted to say something else but I really didn’t know what to say. I just wasn’t into it. I had too much on my mind. I couldn’t let go. I knew I needed to just tell him.

“Norah, what’s wrong?” he asked as he put on his boxer briefs. “Please tell me what is going on?” he was still panting. He was facing his dresser with his hands on his hips and his head was lowered to the floor.

“I don’t know,” I whispered. He turned to face me.

“Don’t give me that bullshit. It has been four days, Norah! Four days and I can’t make you come! I used to be able to make you come by touching you and whispering in your ear, and now I have done everything I can think of, except beat it out of you and I can’t make it happen. So I suggest you start talking, because taking you to the basement and beating it out of you is next, little one.” I had to tell him. I just needed to say it.

I moved off the bed and grabbed my sweatpants off the floor and put them on. I pushed my hair off my face and ran my fingers through the rest of it to tame it just a little bit. Then I walked over to the middle of the room and stood with my head lowered.

“We’ve been through so much lately, I just didn’t want to bother you with something else,” I whispered. I was trying to keep my voice low because I knew he was about to scream.

“Tell me, Norah! Now,” he demanded. I took a deep breath. I still wasn’t ready to tell him but I knew I had no choice.

“I’m pregnant,” I mouthed the words and sound came out of my mouth but I didn’t hear it.

“What?” he was speaking loud enough for both of us.

“I said, I’m pregnant,” I spoke a little louder this time and I raised my head when I said the words. Our eyes locked.

His eyes always told me how he felt. His eyes could speak for him when words failed him. I kept searching his eyes hoping to see some kind of hint as to what he was feeling. But this time I couldn’t tell. His eyes weren’t cold or evil like I thought they would be at this moment.

“You’re pregnant?” he finally asked.

“Yes,” I nodded.

“How long have you known?” It was a fair question. But something I didn’t want to answer.

“I’m almost 20 weeks,” I answered and dodged the real question.

He ran his hands through his hair and paced back and forth, then he walked to me and dropped to his knees. He placed his hands on my hips and his cheek on my stomach.

“We’re going to have a baby,” he breathed out. He looked up at me and his eyes were glassy. “Norah, I’m so happy.” He kissed my bare stomach and ran his hands over it. Then he stood up and wrapped his arms around me, kissed my neck and then my mouth.

“This is wonderful news, little one.” I wrapped my arms around his neck and raised myself to my tip toes and we hugged for a while in silence.

To say I was shocked was the understatement of the year. ‘Wonderful news’ was not the words I thought he would say.

Kissing me and holding me lovingly was not the reaction I thought I would get.

“Wait,” he pulled away and looked me in my eyes. “What does you being pregnant have to do with you not being able to have an orgasm? And 20 weeks? I mean, I can see you have gained a little weight but shouldn’t you be showing?” I pulled away from his arms and walked to the other side of the room and turned back to face him.

“I was worried you wouldn’t be happy about it.”

“Why wouldn’t I be happy?”

“Are you serious?” I asked. He put his hands on his hips and looked confused.

“Yes. Why wouldn’t I be happy, Norah?”

“Because anytime anything has happened in our relationship that you didn’t control you have a dominate tantrum and act out in some way. I didn’t do this on purpose,” but he didn’t let me finish my thought.

“A dominate tantrum and acting out? So you’re saying I act like a child?” I didn’t answer him. I knew better. “What have I done to make you feel this way, please tell me?” he asked. I didn’t want to answer. I didn’t want to argue.

“When I wanted to go home for Tiffany’s wedding, you forbid it and then threw a fit when I went anyway. When I told you I wanted to get a job, you lost it. You ranted in the dining room for about 10 minutes about how I was taking your masculinity away by saying I wanted to work and contribute to the household.” He started to say something but I held up my hand and went on.

“Then when I told you I wanted to take a full time job, something you knew would take more time away from you, you staged another nutty.”

“Staged a nutty? What in the hell does that even mean?”

“I didn’t want to tell you because anytime anything in our relationship has happened to take my full attention away from you, you make it completely clear you aren’t happy about it.”

“Oh, for goodness sake, Norah. This is different. This is a child not a job. Our child. Why wouldn’t I be happy about that?” He hadn’t raised his voice yet. I was shocked he was so in control of his emotions.

“Yes, a child. I can’t call in sick to being a mother. I can’t plan a vacation and run away with you because we haven’t had any time together at the drop of a hat. Things will change and you know it. The child will come first.”

“Of course the child will come first,” he said that like it was a normal statement for him to make.

“Who are you and what have you done with my husband?” he laughed when I said that…he actually laughed.

“We both know the first time I deny you your conjugal rights because I have been up all night with a baby and then at work all day and I am completely exhausted, you will start looking for another girl to save.”

There it was. One of my concerns. I had many concerns but this was a big one. Having a child would take my attention from him and he would find a distraction. This time his distraction might take him even deeper away from me.

I knew he had crossed lines with his last rescuing venture, lines I dare not ask about.

But I had kept him happy in the bedroom the whole time. If I wasn’t able to do my job as a wife this time, even just for a little while, I was sure he would find a way to keep himself busy.

“Excuse me?” he said it like he was offended. “You think I found out about that auction and wanted to save those girls as a distraction?” again he ran his hands through his hair and turned his back to me. When he turned back I could read the look in his eyes this time, and it wasn’t good.

“Liam, I know you weren’t happy.” I tried to keep my voice low again. “I know our life had become mundane and boring to you.” He interrupted me again.

“So you think I went out and found other girls to save because I was bored?” I started to explain myself but he didn’t let me. “Norah, you can’t be serious. I mean,” he paused. “I mean, you can’t be serious. Yes, our life had become a little too much like a 50’s sitcom, but I didn’t seek out that auction. It fell in my lap and I couldn’t do nothing.”

“Yeah well that isn’t the only thing that fell in your lap,” it was a low blow and I regretted it as soon as I said it. The topic of his indiscretion was something I really didn’t feel like discussing.

He didn’t say anything. He just stood there and looked at me. I lowered my eyes because I couldn’t take his glare.

“I said, I was sorry,” he finally said.

“I know you did and I forgave you,” I whispered.

“It doesn’t sound like it.”

“Liam, you may not have been searching for a bunch of girls to save, but you were looking for something. When it came along you were only too happy to get involved. You were drawn to the excitement, I know that. Going to those parties again, being around those people, in that life, and basically having a free pass from me. You enjoyed it.”

“I enjoyed it? I enjoyed spending my own money on women? I enjoyed being around sick people who think buying and selling women is a hobby? You really think I am a son of a bitch, don’t you?”

“It wasn’t just that, Liam, and no I don’t. You need excitement. You like the thrill. And most of it is sexually charged. How are you going to feel changing diapers? Midnight feedings? Toys on the floor? Crayon marks on the walls?” I huffed.

“I’m going to feel fine, Norah.” He walked over to me and touched my face. “You and I created a baby. We are going to be parents, little one. I’m not saying I am going to know how to handle everything that is thrown at me. I’m not saying I will like everything that happens. But we will learn as we go…together.” He kissed my nose. “Stop worrying, little one. Yes, I like excitement. This will provide that excitement in a different way. I’ll get to watch my child grow, learn to walk, chase them in the backyard and hopefully, if we have a boy, pass on my good looks,” he smiled his cocky smile.

“This is wonderful news,” He kissed me again and started backing me towards the bed.

“How have you been able to hide this from me is the more important question? Twenty weeks? That seems like a long time to me.”

“Everyone is different. Some women start showing right away. I didn’t. I was also dealing with a little stress in my life so I wasn’t eating right. I’ve gained about 7 lbs, I guess I should have gained about 10 by now. I’m not far off. It’s the sixth and seventh month when things really start to explode.”

“When did you find out?” he was serious. “When Norah?” he demanded.

“Just before you left for Paris.” He looked very upset. “Can you please name a time between you coming home and now that would have been a good time to tell you?” He didn’t answer.

“Fine. Now that your conscience has been lifted, let me see if I can try again,” he laid me down on the bed and I tensed up. “What’s wrong now?” he leaned up and stood at the end of the bed. I didn’t want to answer him…again. I sat up and lowered my eyes. “Norah, I said everything is going to be fine. What’s the matter?” he asked. He ran his hands up and down my thighs indicating he wanted to pull off my sweatpants.

“I’m worried you won’t be attracted to me anymore,” I looked up at him.

“Why, in the name of all that is holy, would that ever happen?” he had his sexy smirk on his face.

“Come on, women’s bodies change after they have a baby, you know that. I could have stretch marks, a flabby tummy, not be able to lose the weight I gain and ya know, there’s my…” I cleared my throat. “I mean, I was a virgin when we met and you always talk about how good I feel.” He started laughing. “Liam, I’m serious.” He walked away from the bed and over to the side table to grab a bottle of water.

I moved to my knees and turned my body to him. “You always talk or moan rather, about how tight I am, how firm my body is and how perky my breasts are. That could all change.” He drank some water and then climbed on the bed with me and handed me the water bottle.

“Look at me, I’m already changing!” I pulled my pants to show him my pot belly.

“I know all those things could happen,” he was still smiling.

“And?” I prompted.

“And I don’t care!” I rolled my eyes and moved my body so I could jump off the bed.

“Norah, please! I can’t believe you are worried about this!” He was laughing.

I crossed my arms against my chest and turned to face him.

“Yes, I love your body. I probably love your body more than I should. I think about it all the time. Your body is perfection and my obsession,” He moved to the end of the bed but remained on his knees. “People should write songs about this body.”