Tears of the Broken (52 page)

“
Immoral?” With a slow breath, he floated up to stand and
towered over me—casting a dark shadow across my face. “You think me
to be—immoral?”

“
I’m
sorry, David, but…I do.” I kept my head down, my eyes on David’s
clenched fist, and his energy—the kind of force surrounding him
that’s normally warm and soft—turned cold, and a strange tearing
sensation filled the air with a chilling rush over my
chest.

“
If you could
only
see what you are doing—what it
will do to me to be without you.” The smooth, weightless tone of
his voice became thick and coarse. “I am not immoral, and I do have
a heart—
feelings
to be exact.”

When
our eyes met, my stomach tightened into my throat at the sight of
the liquid agony in his very human eyes. “David—”

“
No.
Can’t you see? Ara—you have no idea what you’re giving
up.”

“
If
you knew my heart, you’d know those words are untrue,” I whispered,
looking away from the broken pieces of the boy I love.

“
If I knew your heart, Ara, I would’ve known
I should
never
have shared myself with you.” He cut the air with his
hand.

“
You’re right,” I said irresolutely. “You should never’ve told
me.” It hurts me to think like this, but I’d still be in the blind,
rose-coloured bliss that first love brings if he had just left
without telling me why. Well, either that or sad and alone. But at
least it would all be normal.

“
So
that’s it, then—you want nothing to do with me, now?” David
asked.

“
You
should’ve given me more time. I wasn’t ready for you to come back
yet, David.”

He
took two slow steps away from me, and his head tilted to one side
as the distance became greater. “Well, have no fear, my love. I
shall not make that mistake again.” He sounded a hundred years old
to me, then. The weight of his existence tore down my walls as I
watched him walk away, and somewhere inside me, a little voice
screamed out, echoing from the depths of my soul—warning me that if
he leaves now, I will
never
see him again.

“
Wait!” I called in a breath of desperation—reaching for him
as I jumped to my feet. “David, wait.”

He
stopped, crouched on the ledge of my window, keeping his eyes on
the night below.

“
Please.” I clutched at my heart as it burned in my chest.
“Please, give me more time. I’m not ready to let go, yet, I
just—maybe we could have until the end of the summer, at least.
But, I just need time to think about it.”

David turned his head and looked into my eyes. Tears flowed
down over my cheeks, and when the vampire jumped back into my room
and stood right before me, I didn’t even flinch. Not one uneven
breath escaped me.

He
leaned down and pressed his cold fingertips to my face, rolling it
firmly upward to meet his. A short gasp stopped in my throat as
David’s smooth, gentle kiss parted my lips, and his unnaturally icy
touch only made my heart soar.

He
inhaled deeply through his nose, then pulled away with a sharp
breath and looked deep into my eyes. “Follow your heart, mon
amour,” he said, keeping hold of my face. “When nothing in this
world makes sense anymore, just follow your heart.”

I
drew a shaky breath and closed my eyes as an intense exchange of
hope and fear consumed our souls, and in a flash, as I opened them
again—he was gone.

Gravity made me stumble forward a step in his wake, and my
heart burned with the absence of his kiss.

The
night below my window, cool and quiet, regarded none of the tension
in my soul. A lonely cricket hummed his perfect song, and I closed
my eyes as the last day that life was everything I expected came to
an end.

Squinting in the bright morning sun as my joggers clapped
over the pavement below me, I started down the street—away from the
school. I want to run as far away from that building as I can
get.

I
drew deep, throat-grazing breath of the near-autumn chill, and
tried to ignore the thin layer of frost over my cheeks, also
stinging my ears. Running used to be a free-flying, bouncing kind
of feeling for me, but now, it’s more like trying to jump under
water. I’m so unfit. I think I’ve had too much chocolate and not
enough real food. But it’s good to feel real. The tight stitch, the
inability to breathe, the sweat beading on my brow—it’s all normal.
And none of it’s fair. I should be ignorant to all of it—sunshine,
birds singing, hearing my dad talking in the kitchen or a car
taking off down the street—no one my age should appreciate the
little things.

When
I wake up, my only dilemma should be which dress I want to wear. It
sucks that I have to either lose the boy I love, or become
immortal—and the fact that David kills people
really
sucks. No pun intended. The
only trouble is, when I conclude not to love him, it hurts inside—a
physical ache in my gut, like the one that nearly made me throw up
on the first day of school.

If
he wasn’t an evil vampire, I’d have no problems loving him until
the end of summer—well, until the end of time, really—but I can’t
change what he is, and I can’t accept it, either. I just
can’t.

I
stopped running and folded over for a second, pressing my fingers
to the mind-consuming stitch in my gut. I must’ve been running for
longer than I thought.

People started to fill the day around me, and cars stole the
quiet from the
T-junction at the end of the footpath. I looked at my watch. Wow,
it got late—I’ve been running for twenty minutes.

“
Hello stranger,” a soft, soprano voice said.

I
turned around, surprised. “Hey, Emily. Do you live around
here?”

She
shook her head and motioned behind her. “Spencer lives here. I
stayed over last night.”

“
What?” My eyes bulged. “Stayed over?”

“
Yeah.” She smiled and nodded. “Oh, I mean, not like that—I
was just babysitting his little sister.”

“
Oh,
okay.” I touched my collarbone.“Didn’t you go to the wake, at
Betty’s?”

“
Yeah, but Spencer’s mum’s a nurse. She got called in on night
shift after.”

“
So—can’t Spence babysit?”

Emily scoffed, obviously humoured. “He’s just not that kind
of guy.”

“
Oh.” I wandered over and leaned next to her on the brown
picket fence.

“
So—” she looked down at my running-shorts, then my
sweat-covered forehead, “I’m gonna go out on a limb here and guess
you were—painting?”

We
both laughed.

“
Uh,
yeah.” I looked down at my shoes. “I thought I better start getting
fit.”

“
Hm.” She folded her arms. “Fit. Is everything
okay?”

“
Um,
of course it is,” my tone rose upward.

“
Is
it David?”

“
A
little.” I sighed and dropped my arms as I sat down on the
curb.

“
Let
me guess,” she sat beside me, “he’s got you all
confused?”

“
It’s a talent of his, isn’t it?” I said.

“
Yeah. So, what is it? What’s he done?”

He’s
a vampire, and he kills people. “He said he loves me.”

Her
mouth fell open a little, but nothing came out.

“
Yeah.” I huffed. “I know, hey.”

“
Hm, well, he’s never done
that
before, either—are
you happy?”

I
nodded and sort of shook my head, too. “Normally, when I have this
kind of crisis, I ring Mike, but—”

“
You
miss Mike?”

I
stared ahead for a second, my mind ticking. “I think I really
do.”

“
Did
you guys spend a lot of time together?”

“
Um,
well, yeah. And we used to jog together all the time.” I held my
jacket off my skin a little. “I think that’s why I’ve only found
gloom and longing on this run.” Instead of resolution.

“
Hm,
so, what would he think to see you so unfit, then?” She motioned to
my sweating and panting self.

“
He’d laugh at me, but secretly, he’d love it. We we’re always
challenging each other.” I looked up to the wispy white clouds and
smiled. “Despite that, and despite that he was faster than me, he
always ran beside me—you know, kept to my pace.”

“
Well, he sounds considerate.”

“
Yeah. He was—when it came to me.” I laughed
then, at a memory. “We had this band of seagulls on the corner of
my street. Whenever we’d run that course, the damn things’d barely
scatter a few feet in the air to get out of the way. It was really
annoying. I always promised myself I was gonna put my foot right up
their butts if they didn’t move—” I rested my elbows on my knees,
my chin on my palm. “Mike called them
gullsters
…instead of
gangsters.”

“
You
didn’t, though? Did you? Kick them?” Emily looked
horrified.

Leaning back quickly, I said, “No! No way. Mike would,
though—” I stared ahead then, “he never had any problems kicking
butt. I guess that’s why he’s so suited to The Force.”

“
The
police?”

“
Yeah. He’s joining the…kind of like, SWAT unit.”

“
Really?” Emily grinned. “That is super sexy.”

“
I
guess.” I breathed out slowly. “It’s dangerous, though.”

“
You
worry about him?” she asked.

Pressing my lips together, I slowly shrugged. I worry a lot.
“I see him, you know?” I looked at Emily; she has no idea what I
mean. “When I run, my mind kinda places him beside me, and I can
actually see his cute, sort of cheeky smile and his sandy blonde
hair. I miss him. I miss home.”

“
Why’d you move here?”

Gulp. I shrugged. “Uh, to be with my dad.”

Emily nodded. “Do you like it here?”

With
a deep breath, I looked down at the mildly busy street, then tilted
my face into the warming sun as it melted the early-morning chill
from my cheeks. “It’s not like home. It’s not hot and dry, and
there’s no ocean in the distance, no black cockatoos on the
lampposts, but—”

“
But
even though it’s different—it’s still good, right?”

For
a second, I studied her face. “Um, yeah. Different, but I still
love it.”

“
Well, good—” she nudged me with her elbow, “because you’re
starting to grow on us, Ara. Everyone was really disappointed you
weren’t there last night—at Betty’s.”

“
Yeah.” I smiled sheepishly and looked down at my untied
shoelace, dangling, wet and muddy, from my sneaker. “I wasn’t
feeling well.”

“
I know. I saw the whole
“
Save me, David, save
me
,” thing—” she held her forearm to her
brow and pretended to fall backward a little, then dropped her
hand, smiling. “He was really worried about you, you know.” She
looked down and shrugged. “We all were.”

My
cheeks flushed with heat and the cold stinging in my ears subsided,
almost melted. “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just because I didn’t
eat.”

“
Yeah, Mr. Thompson told me.”

Emily looked up when a car pulled into Spencer’s driveway. “I
gotta go. My mum’s here.”

I
stood up and dusted the loose pebbles of bitumen from my shorts.
“Okay, Em. I’ll see ya later.”

“
Are
you coming to school, today?” she asked.

I
shook my head. “Nah, Dad’ll give me the day off after what happened
yesterday.”

“
Okay, well, don’t be a stranger.” She walked backward toward
the burgundy car.

I
waved and turned toward home, then walked the rest of the street
and landed, in a huffing mess, on the porch step near Vicki’s grey
cat. He rubbed his back into the ground, sunning himself all over,
with his little paws curled up under his chin. “I’m not petting
you, Skitz.” I raised my brow at him when he meowed at me. “You
should know me better, by now.”

He
jumped to alert suddenly, flipping onto his belly with his paws
flat and his eyes fixed on something at the end of the driveway.
What is he doing? I sat up a little more and the creaky step dipped
under my weight. Skittles’ tail lashed about as he waited patiently
in the shadows of a rose bush. Everything went silent. The maple
tree in front of Dad’s house rustled, and all the birds stopped
singing. I looked up—feeling my heart skip. “David?” Oh, come on,
Ara, don’t be silly, he’s not in the damn tree.

Shaking my head at myself, I looked back at Skittles. His
back feet wiggled under his crouch for a second, then, he flew
through the air and landed on the ground delicately. I didn’t even
notice anything there before, but as he lifted his head to look
around, I saw a grey body struggling between his paws. “Hey, way to
go, Skitz.”

The
cat scoured the scene—probably making sure it was safe to unveil
his prey—then tossed the mouse into the air and caught it in his
teeth, pausing to scrutinize me. “Gross.” Time to go
inside.