The Beginning of Us (207 page)

“Well alright then Aristotle aren’t you full of knowledge.”

“Baby you ain’t seen nothing yet,” I smirk putting my arm around her shoulders. Not sure why I did that but it’s nice. She doesn’t pull away and I see a small smile on her face.
Oh fuck me
.

When we walk into the bar, ‘Until You’ by Billy Currington is playing. Interesting song choice. I look down at Karly and her lips are moving. Is she singing? We take a seat at the bar, “What do you want?”

“Hmmmm let’s do two shots of Washington Apple.”

“Alright sounds good.” I get the bartender’s attention and order the shots. “So you sing?”

“Huh?” She whips her head to me. “No!”

“Yeah you do. I heard you…Well kinda.”

“I mean sometimes but it’s not like I’m good,” she nervously laughs turning her head to the small dance floor.

Our shots come and we take it. Shit that’s good. Karly makes the cutest face I’ve seen. Her whole face scrunches up as she shakes her head. “You wanted this shot and you’re having a hard time?”

“I haven’t drank in so long! Back in college I wasn’t a huge drinker and neither was Neil, but when we drank oh my gosh it was
bad.
”

“How so?” I know she’s not going to answer me. I take a quarter out and flip it. Heads. “You have to answer now.”

“So not fair! But fine. One night we got wasted and Neil dared me to run around outside the frat house naked. So I did. Let’s just say, it wasn’t one of my finer moments.”

A naked Karly. Damn. I would’ve given anything to see that.
We order another round of drinks and I watch as she sits next to me cradling her glass. I flip the coin again to get her attention. Heads. She shakes her head laughing. “Alright serious question now.”

“You? You can be serious?”

I shrug. “Sometimes. Alright,” I take a drink of my beer before asking her. “Will you be Emma’s nanny? I never thought about getting one lined up for her and if you can’t it’s fine. I can put her in day care and my mom can bring her to Pre School, but you’ll be helping me a lot if you can watch her while I’m at work. She’s easy and she already adores you. It’ll be a win-win plus I’ll pay you.” Damn that sounds bad I hope she doesn’t get offended.

“I’d love to be her nanny! I freaking love Emma! And no you’re not paying me! I have the time to watch her since no one’s calling me back for an interview so why not? I don’t really have any other plans either so yes it’s a win-win.”

“Thank you it means a lot,” I reach over and give her a hug. We stay in this embrace for a few moments. She feels perfect in my arms, the right fit, and I’m not sure if I want to let go. “Do you wanna dance?”

“Okay.”

I get up, taking her hand in mine and lead her to the dance floor. ‘Ready to Love Again’ by Lady Antebellum plays bringing more people to the floor. What the hell is going on with the song choices tonight? The words sink in as Hilary sings about wandering around and didn’t know who she was. It hits me. This is me. I’m scared of love, but most of all scared of being alone. After Jamie I played it safe and built a concrete wall around my heart.

Without thinking and throwing out my fears, I wrap my arms around her waist looking down into her eyes. The closeness of our bodies sends pleasure down to my groin.

“You’re really short,” I laugh trying to break the tension.

“Shut up!” Karly’s arms rest around my neck as we sway to the music. I bring her closer to my body, breathing in her vanilla scent. Her intoxicating smell is driving me crazy. She rests her face against my chest holding me tighter. Like I said perfect fit.

The song changes to ‘She Will Be Loved’ by Maroon 5. The words hit me again and I feel everything he’s singing.

“This is one of my favorite songs,” she whispers in my chest.

I don’t answer her. Instead I hold her tighter, letting her know I don’t want to let her go and this moment is complete. My heart starts pounding. Feelings start stirring. Feelings I’ve buried so deep in my core. She’s the one who makes me feel again. When the song ends Karly slowly leaves my arms and immediately I miss her. Without thinking I lean in kissing her lips.

Chapter 7
Karly

Oh hell freaking hell on all things precious. He’s kissing me! He’s freaking kissing me.

His tongue glides along my bottom lip and I swear I think my knees are about to give out. I slowly open my mouth, inviting him in. Our tongues meet and wow he can kiss. The slow sexy dance with our tongues is turning me on full force. The ache between my thighs increases and my heart is beating so fast. He’s leaving me breathless.

I sigh,
breathless.

“Nicholas?” I whisper on his lips. “Wow.”

He kisses the tip of my nose, “Yeah.”

We go back to the bar and order one more round before leaving. I’m not sure what happened on the dance floor, but I know one thing for sure; I really like him.

* * * * *

“Bradley, please don’t leave me,” I sobbed holding his hand. “I don’t have anyone else. You’re my life.”

I saw the tears soaking his eyes. Why was he leaving me? I thought we were fine. He was here for me every day and promised me forever. He looked away from me and shook his head. “Let me go Karly. I’m sorry, alright? We’re not meant for each other. It’s been a fun four years, but did you really think we’d go off to college still dating?” The coldness in his voice sent chills down my body. There was no love or happiness.

“Y-yes,” I sobbed again. I hated crying. It’s all I’ve been doing for the past four weeks. My life was ruined. I was alone and damaged. “I-I don’t have anyone. You promised me forever. You promised that you’d always take care of me.”

“Promises are meant to be broken.” He turned his head and looked at me. His green eyes lost the love that was there before when he was looking at me. His love was gone. “I gotta go, alright? Good luck with everything. Maybe one day...” his voice trailed off. He pulled back his arm and walked out the hospital doors without looking back. I screamed for Bradley to come back, but no one was coming back.

I wake up suddenly in a pool of sweat. “What the fuck?” I haven’t thought of Bradley in so long. Why’s he invading my dreams? Ugh. After a great night with Nicholas I think about Bradley? I’m truly fucked up. I look and see that it’s three in the morning.

Quietly I get up and head to the kitchen for a glass of water. It’s dark when I open the door. I make it to the kitchen and drink the cold water. When I set the glass down on the counter my mind goes back to Bradley. It’s weird how he’s slowly invading my thoughts. We haven’t talked since he left me in the hospital. The last I heard he’s some big shot in New York City. Looks like he got everything he wanted.

“Get it together, Karly.” I head back to my bedroom and fall back asleep.

The Monday morning air swiftly hits my face as I run along the shore. The sun is slowly rising and I love hearing the sounds of the water crash. Running helps me clear my head and puts things back in perspective. Pushing myself the last leg of my run before slowing down to walk. The beach is quiet this morning. There are a few people out walking their dogs and running like me.

“Karly?”

I quickly turn around and see Bradley jogging over to me.
Holy shit this isn’t happening!

“Bradley?” He runs over to me and stops a few feet from me. I’m not sure how to react or what to say. I yell at myself for staring at him and not turning around. I have to remember this is the guy that ripped out my heart and stomped on it while I lay in the hospital bed alone and scared.

“I knew that was you. Wow, it’s been so long. How are you?” He comes to me, opening his arms and bringing me in for a hug. I’m not sure what to do. Should I hug him back? A few seconds pass before I hug him back. This is weird.
Oh my God this isn’t happening! How is my ex here?

“Um, I’m good. You?”

Bradley starts laughing and shows me his incredible smile.
I’m not sure what I’m feeling. I should be mad. I should hate him and tell him off, but I can’t. Honestly I’m a little relieved to see him. 

“I’m great. I just moved here a few weeks ago. Got a job as an assistant coach for UNCW. I ah heard you were here, but never thought I’d see you again.” Suddenly the beach feels really small. I’m standing in front of my high school sweetheart in my shorts and pullover. Nervous? Oh God yes. I cannot believe this is happening! “Can I walk with you? I’m done with my run.”

Everything’s telling me to say ‘no’ and tell him to drop dead. But there are still so many questions I want to ask him, and a lot of those questions start with ‘why.’

“Sure that’s fine.” Of course I give in.

We walk close to the shore in silence, admiring the nature around us. This is how it used to be with Bradley. We’d wake up in the morning and go for a run through the park.

We were big into sports during school. He was on the basketball team and I played soccer and track. Back in high school it was easy. He knew about my parents and kept me safe. When things got bad at home I ran to be with him. Nothing ever happened between us though and I wondered if anything would have if we stayed together. I wonder if we’d be married with kids or something by now.

Once everyone found out about my dad’s debt, gambling, and drug addiction I was looked at like a leech. No one wanted to be around me. I was shunned. I was tainted. It sucked being alone, but at least I knew who my true friends were. No one.

“What happened to basketball? You were on a scholarship in Connecticut.”

“Yeah I was, but it wasn’t for me anymore. I lost my passion my junior year and it never came back so I focused more on the coaching and training side.” His voice is soft and full of regret. Our hands brush, but I don’t feel anything.

“I’m sorry.” Basketball was his world. He had his eye on Connecticut since we were young. 

“How’s life in NC?”

“Good. I got done at UNC in Chapel Hill and just moved here. I like it. It’s different from Boston you know?”

“Yeah.” We fall quiet again and walk for a few more minutes before turning back and head toward the parking lot.

“So how are your parents? What else is going on?” I sound way too happy.

Bradley throws his head and laughs. “I miss your voice, Karly. Always wondering and asking questions. Some things don’t change.” I nod my head and drink my water. “My parents are good. They got divorced. Mom’s in Australia or wherever. We haven’t talked in a while. Dad’s here with me. We got closer since the divorce.”

“I’m sorry about your parents.” I want to talk about anything except us.

“Na it’s alright. I tried looking you up but no luck.” I wonder why he did that. “I thought about you a lot and wondered how you were doing, you know?”

I’m not sure if shocked is the word but what he’s telling me leaves me speechless. Why is he telling me this all of a sudden? It’s out of nowhere but it’s not making me uncomfortable or sad. I’m actually feeling happy. “Yeah I kinda disappeared and wanted to focus on myself.” My voice trails off remembering my lonely years. I shake off the dwelling feelings and tell myself that those years are in the past and I’m okay now. I’m not alone anymore. “Why’d you think about me?”
Damn!

“I never wanted to break up with you Karly.” He turns to face me but I stay where I am. I can’t face him. “My mom threatened to take away my trust fund and leave me with nothing. I was scared. She thought you would ruin me.”

“You shoulda known better, Bradley. You shoulda known I would
never
do that. I needed you Bradley.” I put my head down. I can’t let him see my pain. I trusted him with my life and then he turns around and leaves me when I needed him the most. I shouldn’t be giving him
my
time! So why am I standing here looking at him and listening to his bullshit?

“I know, and I’ll never forgive myself. Maybe we can be friends? I’m here now and I wanna make things better. I know I have a lot to make up for and it’s gonna take time, but I’m willing to wait. When I heard you were here I did everything I could to get the job at UNCW. Being close to you is all I’ve ever wanted.” I nod my head, not sure what else to say. I understand what he’s saying. When I close my eyes I remember all of our happy times, but then flashes of his betrayal come back.

“Why are you telling me all of this? It’s not fair,” I move away, but he grabs my arm.
      
“Just give me a second chance to be in your life again. Even if we don’t end up together I still wanna be friends. Karly, you were my best friend. You’re
still
my best friend. I don’t care how long it’s been since we talked. I’ve always wondered what it’ll be like to see you again.” His hand strokes my scar and I see the look of guilt in his eyes. “I’m sorry I left you alone.”

“Yeah well you were my best friend and someone I loved, but you left me when I needed you the most. I was left alone, Bradley. You know that everyone left me. I had no one.”