The Do-Over (19 page)

He’d met for drinks with an associate who was now with the
Times
. They’d offered him a position there with a generous salary. He’d always dreamed of working at the
Times
and living in New York. It would be the pinnacle to his career. That was, until the Pulitzer nominations were announced. There was already buzz about that too. New York and the Pulitzer used to be all he thought about. Now he was drifting. A month ago, if he’d been offered such a prestigious opportunity, he wouldn’t have asked for time to think about it. He would have gladly accepted on the spot and given his notice. Now he had a list of reasons to stay. He’d rationalized he was just growing up and thinking about the cons of leaving Rachael and his nephews. He also loved Chicago and his apartment. Moreover, there might even be better job offers now that he was on the road to the Pulitzer.

Part of it confused him, especially when he looked at Lanie. They had no future. Their whole relationship was built on fraud, and Kyle would only hurt her in the end. Despite all that, he felt the sharp, lunging pangs of jealousy slicing through him like a million tiny daggers when two men approached her at the bar. One, a tall, broad-shouldered man with sandy brown hair, was especially aggressive. He laughed loudly at something she was saying and kept leaning closer to her. Kyle had never experienced true jealousy until her. A bitter heat rose from the pit of his stomach, and his jaw tightened. He gripped the wineglass so firmly that it was liable to break. He didn’t like these feelings at all. He had no right to own them. He and Lanie had a friendship forged on some loose, misguided goal on her part and some crazy need to assist on his.

Kyle managed to convince himself it wasn’t jealousy, but an innate desire to protect Lanie. After all, she had no idea how desirable she really was. Lanie was a phase that he needed to ride out. He would tire of her eventually. It was just taking longer, much longer in this case. Still, if that guy reached out to stroke her arm again…

“Hi, Manchester.” Brad’s chipper voice interrupted Kyle’s thoughts, irritating him further.

“Jansen, how goes it?” Kyle greeted, although he couldn’t care less how Brad was. His presence always annoyed him these days.

“Pretty good. You?”

“Can’t complain.”

“Lanie looks beautiful,” Brad said, gesturing toward the bar as if Kyle weren’t already looking straight at her.

“Lanie always looks beautiful. What’s your point?” Kyle did not care for Brad’s compliment at all.

“Nothing, man. I’m just saying she looks different. She’s changed since you two started dating,” Brad replied, holding his hands out in a gesture of calming Kyle down. It only served to further aggravate him.

“What do you want?”

“Jeez, you’re an ass today. I just wanted to say hi to my friend. The guy who hasn’t been returning my calls. The one who canceled our last two squash games. The guy I wanted to congratulate on a great article. Have you seen him?”

“Thanks, Brad. Look, I’m sorry. I haven’t been dodging you. I’ve been busy.” Actually, he had been busy, but he’d also been avoiding Brad at any opportunity.

“Yeah…busy with Lanie.”

“Yes. Again, what’s your point?”

“She’s a nice girl. Break up with her now before she gets too deep. You’ve had your fun with her.”

Kyle turned to Brad, suddenly wondering if he should laugh or punch him in the face. “I’m not going to hurt her.” Kyle almost added that if anyone was going to hurt her, it would be Brad, but he caught himself.

“Kyle, I know you. Think about her.”

“Maybe I’m different too.” Kyle had no idea where the thought had come from, but it sounded right to him. “And what Lanie and I do is none of your business, so back the fuck off.”

Brad narrowed his eyes, giving Kyle a hard stare. “It is my business because I set you up. I wanted you to take her out for dinner, not start some twisted relationship with her. Are you forgetting who you are? You’re the guy who had sex with my prom date in the boys’ bathroom.” Brad smacked his head in an exaggerated gesture. “Oh, but I forgot, your prom date was there too.” He held out his wineglass in a mock toast. “You’re always a gentleman, aren’t you?”

Kyle chuckled, recalling the incident. It had taken Brad a week to forgive him, but he eventually did. “My memory is that you were wasted, throwing up on the football field. I was being a gentleman, looking after your date and keeping mine happy at the same time. You should thank me. I made sure prom was a great memory for those girls.”

“Do you think Lanie’s the kind of girl who’s into that stuff?”

Kyle suddenly felt remorseful, worried about how Lanie would react to such a story, not that Brad would ever tell her. “I appreciate your concern, but I won’t hurt her.”

“She needs someone who will be there for her.”

Kyle’s fist clenched as his remorse catapulted to anger.

Kyle turned to Brad, eyes blazing. “Like you were there for Rachael when she needed you?”

Brad’s face turned ashen. They hadn’t spoken about it for years. Buried, but not forgotten.

“That’s not fair. You forgave me for that.”

“I’m reconsidering that.” He let his words sink in, but neither man spoke for a minute, both choosing to polish off their drinks. Kyle was done with the conversation and found himself further irked at Brad for distracting him from the lechers sitting next to Lanie. “I have to go. The vultures are circling my girlfriend.” The word
girlfriend
felt foreign to Kyle, and it must have sounded off because Brad raised his eyebrows in surprise.

“Those are just guys she works with. They’re probably talking shop.”

“God, are you really this dense? Here’s the deal, Jansen. I don’t like guys ogling Lanie, present company included. Are we clear?”

Brad held his hands out and actually staggered back against Kyle’s steely gaze. “Wow, did you turn psycho overnight? I’m dating her sister. I would never cheat on Cassie.”

Kyle sighed before giving him the tightest smile. “I know that, and right now that’s the only thing I like about you.”

He walked off, leaving Brad stunned speechless. He knew he was being an awful friend, and, if anything, Brad was the innocent one in this whole scheme. Lanie wasn’t even that guilty. She wasn’t illicit or inappropriate in any way in Brad’s presence. She was really just waiting for the world to fall into place for her. In many ways, Kyle felt like the evil instigator in this crazy mess. The man at the bar placed a strand of Lanie’s hair behind her ear. Smoke magically emanated from Kyle’s ears.

“Let’s dance,” he said, taking her hand possessively.

“Oh, Kyle, this is Adam Stone. I work with him,” she said, gesturing to the sandy-haired man. The other one had disappeared thankfully. Kyle regarded him coldly. Adam smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes, confirming all of Kyle’s suspicions.

“Adam.” Kyle grasped Adam’s hand, crushing it in his own, and was pleased by the wince in the other man’s expression. “Nice to meet you. Please excuse us. I promised my girlfriend a dance tonight.”

He led Lanie out to the dance floor as “You’ve Really Got a Hold on Me” by Smokey Robinson and the Miracles started playing. He grasped Lanie in his arms a little too tightly, whispering in her ear, “Just remember how we practiced.”

“Kyle, you’re laying it on a little thick,” Lanie replied.

“I thought I was just being attentive.”

“You are. Thanks for coming tonight.”

“You look beautiful, Lanie.” She looked away from him as she often did when he complimented her.

“Do you like the dress?” She asked the question with apprehension.

Kyle stared at it, realizing what it was that made Lanie look even more tantalizing tonight, a feat he didn’t think was possible. The dress she wore was low cut in front. She never wore anything that revealed her chest due to the scar. It had an asymmetrical strap that perfectly covered the scar. How odd it would be in just the right place.

“I like it very much, and I’m going to love taking it off you later.”

“Your sister helped me pick it out,” she said.

Kyle felt her tense in his arms and knew it was the dancing. He rubbed her back until her muscles loosened. “When you went shopping on Saturday?” Kyle had seen most of her purchases when she was putting her clothes away, and he would have definitely noticed this dress.

“No, I called her the other day. She actually had her seamstress readjust the strap for me,” Lanie replied. Kyle was pleased Rachael and Lanie had bonded. He would never have considered introducing any other girl he was seeing to his sister for that reason. But Lanie wasn’t another girl, and they weren’t dating…not technically.

“You would look gorgeous even if the strap didn’t exist.”

“I couldn’t do that. People stare and ask questions. It’s uncomfortable.” He couldn’t imagine how Lanie had to struggle with so many choices around that scar. He wanted to ask her what had caused it, but it was apparent she wasn’t ready to talk about it.

“Did Rachael tell you what her husband does for a living?”

Lanie stared down, but Kyle moved his hand from her waist to tilt her chin so she was looking at him. “Yes, she told me he’s a plastic surgeon, and he could make it disappear. I’m thinking about it.”

“I only brought it up because it affects you so much. I think you look amazing just the way you are.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that.” He could hear the doubt in her voice. She didn’t believe him, but it wouldn’t do any good to say more. It would just make her uncomfortable.

“What were you and Adam talking about? He seemed kind of touchy-feely with you.”

“I was wondering about that. I’ve worked with him for years, and I didn’t think he knew my name. I think he was flirting with me. He asked me to lunch next week.”

Kyle struggled to make his voice clear, knowing his hands were shaking slightly. “Are you going to lunch with him?”

She shrugged. Kyle had an urge to take her by those shoulders and shake her. “I don’t know. He seems nice, and maybe I should broaden my horizons.” Kyle’s body tensed as soon as she said it. She must have felt it too because she backed away and looked at his face.

“Why do you have to broaden?” Kyle didn’t even know if she meant dating or more, but either way he disapproved.

“It can’t hurt to get more…perspective.”

“I don’t offer you enough…perspective? That kind of offends me.” Kyle tried to relax his face into a smile, but he was finding it difficult. It was a grimace at best.

“You’re acting weird. What are you trying to say?”

“I don’t think you should see anyone else while we’re together.” He spun her around, wanting to dismiss the surprised look on her face and give himself another second to think.

“Why?”

Why? As a journalist, Kyle chided himself for not expecting her to ask the most obvious question. He braced himself to pull off the most manipulative lie he could conjure.

“If Brad thinks we’re in a serious relationship, what will he think about you cheating on me?”

The song changed. It was up-tempo, “Smooth” by Santana. Lanie stepped back, but he pulled her closer. “Kyle, we don’t have to dance this close.”

“We’re not done talking,” he said with a sharper edge in his voice than he intended.

“What difference does it make? Brad can’t think we’re that committed since you’re seeing other women.” It was funny how readily she accepted that. She never questioned it. Kyle was annoyed that she didn’t share his jealousy. Other girls had always broached this topic with trepidation due to their probing angst and underlying questions, but with Lanie, she had no hidden agenda, only total acceptance.

“Lanie, I haven’t been with anyone else since we had sex.” It was lie. In fact, he hadn’t been with anyone since they had made their agreement, but he didn’t want to tell her that.

“Why?” There was that damn word again. The most common question asked in every interview. Why couldn’t he answer it himself?

“Um, well, I’m committed to this. I want Brad to believe us.”

“Oh, Kyle, you don’t have to make so many sacrifices for me.”

“I know I don’t, but I want to. Besides, we’re not using condoms, and even though I use them with other girls, I would want to get retested. I don’t want to risk your health.” Kyle wanted to pat himself on the back for pulling that one out.

“Do you want us to start using condoms so you can date other girls?”

He sighed in frustration. She was really challenging his duplicitous skills. “No, I like it this way.”

“Because it’s so much better sexually?”

He wanted to grab her shoulders and yell at her, “No, because it’s better with you,” but instead he just said, “Yes. So are we in agreement then? No additional perspective needed?”

“Yes, I think you’ve made a good case for being monogamous in our sham.”

“Thank you, Counselor.” He exhaled, letting out a sigh that showed he had been holding his breath. Luckily, she didn’t question it.

“You’ll be glad to know you have the weekend off,” she said, moving away from him. He pulled her back immediately.

“Why is that?” he asked, hoping the alarm didn’t register in his voice.

“Brad and Cassie are going away, so you don’t have to be stuck with me.”

Kyle thought for a minute. He had been looking forward to spending the weekend with Lanie the whole time he was in New York. “We should go away too.” He wondered where the thought had come from. He’d never taken a girl away for the weekend.

“Oh no, don’t worry about it.”

“Lanie, we should take the same step to show our commitment.”

“We can always just say we went away. No one would know.”

Damn, she was too smart. “If you want to make it believable, there needs to be an element of truth in it.”

Lanie smiled but shook her head. “Kyle, I don’t want you to be bored all weekend, and besides, it’s Valentine’s Day part two, otherwise known as Sweetest Day. Where will we go on such short notice?”

Kyle thought hard for a second, and the answer was clear. “We can go to my cabin.”

“You have a cabin?”

“Yes, I think you’ll really like it. We’re friends first, right? You’re working hard and need the break. Besides, Brad’s been to my cabin. What if he asks if you walked the long trail or short trail?”