Authors: Lisa Dawn Wadler
“I thought you . . .”
“I ken you thought I was to marry Dedre and why you believed it true. Again, the fault is mine. But did you nay remember every time I told you what I would want if the choice were mine? How many times did I tell you I wanted you, that if I could, I wanted only you for my wife?”
“I thought you didn’t want me.”
Ian lifted her head to place a kiss to her forehead. “I want you, sweet Claire. I have wanted you since the moment I saw you through the door to your time. Every moment since we met I have wanted you with me and by my side. Not because of the child, but because of all there is between us. Stay with me. We can build a life together, sweet Claire, you and I as one. We will spend our days and nights with one another. My home and hearth are yours to keep as your own. Take my name and my title. Be my wife. Save me one last time, save me from a life without you.”
A smile began to form on her face only to be quickly banished. Even though she reached to touch Ian’s face, she answered with obligation, “Lachlan expects . . .”
“I care naught for what that man expects. Promises were never made. I told him ‘nay’ several times.” He took the hand that held itself away from his face and pulled it to his jaw. “Stay with me. Be my wife.”
Though she gave no answer, Claire pulled his face down and placed a soft kiss to his lips. Ian’s response was immediate; he savored her gentle touch and replied with restrained passion. He held her face in his hands as her arms wrapped around his neck. The kiss was gentle and sweet, given with hesitation as if she tested the words he spoke. Though his body screamed to claim her, to once again make her his, he merely tasted her lips. But some pleasures would not wait. He loosened her bound hair and savored the soft tresses as he answered her with his desire. So long he had endured without this fire between them. Slowly ending the kiss, Ian said, “I need to hear it, sweet Claire. Say ‘Aye.’”
The smile lit her eyes, and he knew before she spoke that he had won. Soft hands caressed his face. “Aye, Ian.”
His arms banded her to him. He felt her sigh, and his heartbeat finally slowed with Claire tucked within his embrace. He needed her as he needed air to breathe. Oaths of safety, declarations of love, and promises to give her anything she wished crossed his lips. He knew he babbled, but it didn’t matter. The only thing that ever truly mattered was his love for her. That she laughed as he rambled only filled his soul with happiness.
“I love you too, Ian.” Claire pulled back just enough to hold his gaze. “Shouldn’t we tell someone about this?”
His hands were lost in her soft hair as he answered the question with a long series of kisses to her lips. “In the morn is soon enough. For now, sweet wife, I would have you to myself.” One taste of her mouth was not enough. Using her hair, he pulled her back to his mouth and kissed her. This time she returned the kiss with more than a trial; she kissed him with fire and passion. The feel of her body pressed against his reminded him that her needs may be different now. He pulled away from the temptation of her lips and cast a glance at the table. “Neala has brought us a fine meal. Are you hungry?”
Claire was surprised at his abrupt end to the kiss. She wanted him with a hunger that had nothing to do with food. For too long she had believed she would live without him. Now she did not want anything but to feel him and to finish what had just begun. She didn’t bother to look at the table as her hands pushed the plaid from his shoulders. Her hands ran over the sculpted shoulders covered by the fine linen shirt. She whispered, “Not yet.”
Even as he moved into her hands, Ian stated, “You are with child.”
“I am and I have been every night we spent here together.” Claire lifted his shirt to reveal his skin and ran her eyes and hands over his muscled chest. His body didn’t lean into her touch as it always had, and she could feel the restraint he used. His shirt landed on the floor, and she wondered how long he would resist. With everything that had happened, this was what she wanted. The connection they shared. The food could wait.
Ian stated with ragged breaths, “You were injured . . . our child could have been lost. I would not do anything to . . .” He stopped talking as her lips touched his chest. A soft moan could be heard as she kissed up his neck and moved across his jaw.
“I am fine now,” Claire whispered against his lips and waited for his reply as her hands once again rediscovered the skin of his chest. “I missed you. I never thought we would be like this again. I thought this was supposed to be our wedding night.” She felt the second his resolve snapped. His hands wrapped in her hair, and he pulled her close.
“For too long we were apart. I have spent every night wishing for you by my side.” Ian gazed down at her and smiled. “As always, you speak true. I have a bride to claim.” There were no more words, and Ian took what she offered.
The reply was a kiss to erase any doubt either may still carry. Her soft sounds were lost beneath his harsh ones. She was caught between the need to hold him close and the want to remove the rest of their clothing. Without breaking the kiss, he loosened the laces holding her gown closed. Claire made short work of the knots on the plaid even as her arms were forced away by the gown being pushed down her hips.
For a moment the air rippled between them, waves of want passing through the breath of air that separated their bodies. Ian dropped slowly to his knees and placed his lips against her slightly rounded stomach. Looking up at her, he whispered, “You have given me such a great gift.”
She could see the moisture pooled in his eyes as his hands covered where the child grew. She smiled through the tears that fell from her eyes. “I believe you gave me this gift.”
Ian stood and held her face. “I plan to be a verra fine husband, Claire. ‘Tis my hope you will receive this gift several times from me.”
“I always wanted a large family, too.” He smiled at the agreement as Claire wrapped her arms around his neck and then lost herself to the sensation of his warmth against her skin. On tiptoes she kissed him with all the love in her heart. She was dimly aware of what was wrong as her foot touched his on the floor, and her smile broke the moment. “Boots, Ian.”
Laughter once again filled the chamber as Ian lifted her and placed her on the center of the bed. The sigh broke free from her lips as Ian’s body covered hers. Her hands freed his hair from the tie and left their kiss shrouded behind its curtain. She rediscovered him, the taste of his mouth, the soft full lips, and the feel of his body as it covered hers.
Placing gentle kisses to her lips, Ian whispered, “You are my wife.”
Claire moved his hair back in her hands to see his eyes and felt another tear fall at the tenderness and love in his gaze. “You are my husband.”
Finally, Ian let go and unleashed his passion as he kissed her with everything he had. She reveled in the feel of his hands roaming her skin. His mouth tasted every inch of her as she let go of the hurt. The weeks of being alone and lost evaporated as he worshiped her. He was everywhere all at once, lips on her thighs, hands kneading her breasts and then kissing her until her breath was gone. Somehow, their boots were all removed. How this was managed Claire had no idea. She was only aware of their need to touch and taste the other.
She was completely lost in the connection between them, and Claire knew it was coming. She also knew this night needed to be different. For the first time, what was between them was honest and real. She was panting when Ian shifted to join their bodies. As she knew he would, he stopped just before he entered her, and a smile crept to her lips.
Perched above her on his elbows, Ian’s body shook as he demanded, “Give me the words, Claire.”
At that moment, she saw only the electric green of his eyes that glowed with need. Claire answered, “No, Ian.” Before he could speak, she reached to cup his jaw. She pulled him close, and whispered, “Tonight you give them to me.”
His shock lasted only a heartbeat before the smile covered his face. Ian whispered, “I am yours, Claire. Always, I have been only yours.”
After she repeated the words, Ian filled her slowly and completely. With their gazes locked together, and their hands entwined, Ian moved gently within her. He whispered soft words of love as their passion grew more heated. The pleasure began deep inside and burst through every limb in her body. Claire heard her name on Ian’s lips as his body released inside hers. Even now she couldn’t hold him close enough. His weight was a welcome blanket that covered her in love.
Ian rolled them to their sides as he kissed her lips. “Never again will we be parted, sweeting. You are mine, and I am yours in all ways. There will be no denying this wedding night.”
“Do you really consider what happened at that inn a wedding night?” Claire asked as she brushed his hair from his face.
Ian moved quickly to place her once again beneath him. “I claimed you and would have been so verra happy to bring you into my walls as my wife. So much time was wasted with us being apart. So much hurt did I cause you. Our child will ken he or she was made on the night we wed. All that matters now is that we are together and nothing can change this truth.”
“You are mine.” Finally Claire knew it was true.
“Aye, sweet wife,” Ian answered as he removed himself from their embrace. His smile grew. “I have something for you, sweeting.”
“I just want you back in this bed.” She sat up to watch him crouch to open the saddlebag that was on the floor. That she had a view of his bare strong back made her smile.
He removed a cloth-wrapped item from the saddlebag and sat by her side. He placed a kiss to her lips. “I wanted you to have this.”
Claire unwrapped the offered item, and tears rolled down her cheeks as she recognized it: the bracelet from her mother, the one she traded for the shelter of the inn. Stunned to have it back in her hands, she stated, “I don’t understand. How did you get this?”
She listened to Ian’s tale of returning to the inn and then how he tracked down the man Thomas had sold it to. “‘Tis part of the reason my return was so delayed. I thought you would wish to have it as a reminder of your mother.”
“Thank you, Ian. I can’t tell you how much this means to me.” She flung her arms around his neck and breathed in his scent. “I can’t believe you did this.”
“I would do all for you, Claire.” Ian held tightly as they fell back onto the bed. “Your happiness is the purpose my life had always lacked. I would do all for you.” Ian’s laughter ended the embrace as Claire’s stomach growled. “Now I must feed you. Let us see what Neala has left us.” He helped her into her robe and then found his. Ian led her to the chairs before the fire to enjoy their wedding feast.
They had feasted before the fire in their robes, and the cold meal had been heaven. In all of his dreams, Ian could have never pictured such a night. They had talked long into the wee hours, sharing the two months missed and all that had taken place. Claire shared her recovery and every aspect of being with child. Ian told her of the mines and the families who served the Draig clan. More importantly, they spoke of what had gone wrong between them. The night had been spent sharing their hurts and fears and finding comfort from the other with words and gentle touches. They made love on the rug before the fire.
Lying now in their bed, Claire’s head was tucked under his chin as her soft breathing filled his ears. His hand covered the life they had created, and he was still awed by this gift she gave. Dawn was approaching and with it a new day. This day would be different. This day was the beginning of their future.
Epilogue
“We loved with a love that was more than love.”
- Edgar Allen Poe
Epilogue
Late winter 1218
Ian entered the chamber quietly with the hope that Claire would be asleep but saw her on the bed propped up by pillows. Ian knew a sleeping wife would have been better than the angry woman he now faced. He approached her side of the bed and sat beside her. “I was only in the hall for a few moments. As I promised we are quickly returned.” The pride rang in his voice. “The clan welcomed our son with great joy.”
Claire took the bundled baby from his arms. “I still don’t see why you had to take him to the hall so soon. For heaven’s sake, he was just born, and it’s freezing.” She shifted the blankets and wrapped her new son snugly, smiling at his sleeping features. “He is so beautiful.”
“That he is, child. Such a fine strong bairn.” Neala placed a cup by the bedside and said, “Drink this when you are able. There are herbs to strengthen you.”
Ian glared at the cup and then at Neala. “You said Claire was fine and that the birth was an easy one. Why does she need this cup?” An easy birth, such words he did not truly understand. Per his wife’s demand, he had stayed and offered his strength. He felt blessed to see his child come into the world, yet his joy mixed with fear for what his wife had endured.
With a quick smile, Neala replied, “Dinna fash yourself, Ian. Claire and the child are fine and hearty. The cup is simply what is done to help regain strength and heal.”
A knock at the door ended the talk. Without waiting for an invitation, Aliana burst in. “How do you fare, sister?”
“I am tired but fine. Come and meet your nephew,” Claire offered as she smiled at the baby nestled in her arms.
“Oh, but he is sweet. It will be fine, Claire. Our children will grow together.” Aliana didn’t pause for breath as she laid out plans for the weeks and years to come.
The open door was an invitation. “Aunt Larry! Aunt Larry! I see, too!” Cerwyn’s arrival was a bit quicker than Hagan’s. The child let Ian pick him up to see the bundle. “He is verra wee, Aunt Larry.” Cerwyn’s voice hinted at displeasure.
Claire answered him. “Soon he will be big just like you. You will have a cousin to play with, I promise.”
Moving to Ian’s side, Hagan spoke with happiness in his voice. “‘Tis a fine thing, is it nay?”
“‘Tis one of the finest things I could ever dream of kenning. As soon as the weather breaks, riders should be sent out to announce his birth. I would have all ken this fine news.”
“Of course, brother. I will see to it myself.” Hagan glanced down at his own sleeping bundle in his arms. “‘Tis a fine thing to have your child welcomed into the world surrounded by family.” As the bundle began to fuss, Hagan said, “Aliana, we should leave Claire to rest. Breana is starting to wake and has need of you. I will see Cerwyn to his bed.”
Aliana offered Claire a kiss to her cheek. “My husband speaks true, rest while the wee one sleeps. I will be back in the morn.” Aliana stepped to Hagan and took her fussing daughter. “Come now, my little love. We shall feed you, and hopefully you will sleep a bit.”
Not willing to give up his perch on the bed, Cerwyn added, “I stay with Aunt Larry.” He snuggled into Claire’s side. “I sleep here.”
Hagan grabbed the squirming child. “Not tonight. Aunt Larry needs to rest. On the morrow you can see her.” Hagan leaned Cerwyn over Claire. “Give her a kiss goodnight.”
Claire smiled as a loud wet smack hit her cheek. “Good night, Cerwyn.”
Hagan bent down to kiss her cheek as well. “Well done, cousin. He is a fine strong son.”
“Thank you, Hagan.”
As the chamber cleared, Neala offered her own farewell. “You should sleep now. I am just down the corridor. Have Ian fetch me should you have need of me.”
Claire reached for Neala’s hand. “Thank you, Neala, for everything. He wouldn’t be here without all of the care you gave us.”
“‘Tis my pleasure, child.” Neala turned to face Ian. “Claire needs to sleep. See it done.” Not waiting to hear an agreement, the housekeeper left and closed the door behind her.
Claire’s eyes grew heavy. The women in his life were again wise. His wife needed to sleep. He sat next to her on the bed and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Is there anything you would like?” He smiled as she leaned into his touch.
“I have everything I could ever want right here in this chamber.” She accepted a soft kiss to her lips. “I love you.”
“And I you, sweeting.” He lifted from the bed to retrieve the dagger from the table by their chairs. “This needs to return to your hand.” He moved back to her side and held out the dagger for her. “With our marriage, this should always be in your hands.”
“Which one, the first or second?” Claire grinned at her joke.
How such a thing became a jest, Ian would never understand. He held up the dagger to the candlelight, and the eyes of the two-headed dragon shone bright. Ian had used this blade to cut the cord from his new son, a moment forever burned in his memory. He took their son from her arms and placed him gently on the bed by Claire’s side then held her hand to place the dagger within. “Since the first Laird of the Draig, the woman he loved has held this dagger. I give this to you as a sign of what is between us.”
Claire gripped the handle in her hands before she set it on the table next to the bed. Tears pricked the corner of her eyes. She answered, “You do realize I only let you borrow this.” She reached to pull him close until his forehead rested against hers and said exactly what he wanted to hear. “I will always wear this at my side. I am yours.”
“As I am yours, sweeting.” He offered a soft kiss to her lips before he helped her to lie down next to their son. Quickly, he added more logs to the fire, not wishing for any to find a chill this night before he joined her in the bed. Settled beside her with their new son between them, Ian asked, “You are certain about the names?”
“Yes, Michael Artair, for our fathers.” Claire smiled as Ian nodded in agreement. They both knew that three good men were represented in the name.
“I agree, ‘tis a fine strong name.” Ian kissed his son’s forehead and became overwhelmed by the emotion of the day. “It pains me to think I could have missed his birth and that you could have been long gone from my side. I dinna ken how life would have any meaning without you.”
“We had a deal that there would be no more talk of what could have been, only our future, Ian. We will enjoy all of our tomorrows together.” She was correct. This night was not for sorrow and what could have been lost but for gratitude that they were together and now a family.
“Aye, sweeting, for every tomorrow I am grateful. Close your eyes and sleep.” As if on command, her eyes fluttered closed, and her soft breathing filled the chamber.
Ian watched them sleep, his wife and their son. Never had any man been more filled with love and joy. His family was safe and warm, the needs of his clan were met, and the Draig lands knew peace. Claire was correct; they had every tomorrow to share. Ian closed his eyes, with his heart filled with the promise that every tomorrow would be spent with Claire by his side.