Authors: L.M. Trio
This particular section of the stadium seems to be bustling with people lingering after the game. When Mikey finally appears, we congratulate him. After shaking hands with the guys, he immediately walks towards me, leaning his head down until his lips brush against my ear. “Ready to pay up?” he whispers softly, sending chills down my spine. I shudder and glance up at him. He knows he got to me. His eyes are focused on my mouth.
“A bet’s a bet,” I say, trying to regain my composure. “When?”
“Now,” he says seductively, still focused on my mouth. I self-consciously wet my lips and he smiles. I take a breath and look at the others, but they are too engrossed in their own conversation to notice what is going on between us. Is there anything going on between us, or is it all in my mind? Is it my own mixed up, wishful thinking, mind? He’s got me so flustered that I rattle off all of the reasons as to why I can’t do it tonight. He laughs at me. He’s messing with me as usual. He tells me I better make it worth his while since I’m making him wait. I laugh and give him a shove.
“I’ll be right back. Don’t move from here, I’m running to the bathroom,” JJ says as she heads in the direction of the restroom, giving me the opportunity to turn my attention towards the others and put an end to our private conversation.
***
(Luke)
“Yeah, sure… I’ll catch up with you at home,” I say to Mikey as he heads out of the locker to meet up with everyone after the game.
As I stand here by myself, the idea that maybe I can just steal a quick look pops into my head. The hallway is crowded so there’s no way I can be seen with everyone moving about. I watch from afar as the five of them stand together and talk. “Traitors,” I say to myself as they all huddle together with this Frank guy who seems to have taken my place. I laugh at myself for stalking them. Alright,
stalking
her
. Deep down, I know I have to be patient. The timing has to be right.
However, when I see her going off on her own towards the restroom, it throws a wrench into my plan and I lose all sense of good judgment. I don’t think of the consequences, all thoughts are about seeing her alone while everyone else seems to be enjoying each other’s company.
I’m waiting off to the side as she exits the restroom. Her head is down and she’s searching around in her purse. A woman with a small child cuts in front of her, causing her to spill her purse all over the floor. The woman rudely keeps walking without apologizing and JJ kneels down to collect her things.
Without thinking, I rush towards her and kneel by her side. She looks so pretty when she’s frazzled that I’m unable to remove my eyes from her face. I pick up her lipstick and a pen. My heart is pounding so loudly that I hear nothing else around me. I’ve dreamt of this day, when I can be so close that I can actually touch her. Her focus is on gathering the contents of her purse and she has yet to notice that I’m kneeling beside her.
“Hey, JJ,” I whisper.
***
(Jesse)
It takes only a moment for my brain to calculate what I hear and in that same moment, my heart violently slams against my chest. It’s the same silken tone that whispered my name a million times before. There’s a pain so deep that I can’t breathe. To convince myself that this is real, I slowly raise my head until my eyes meet his.
His deep brown eyes tear into me with the same intensity I remember. I have every inch of his face memorized and the time apart hasn’t changed much. I want so badly to reach out and touch him, to be sure that he is real, but, I don’t dare. In fact, I don’t even reciprocate his sorrowful smile.
Right now, the only memories I have are of trusting him more than anyone in the world, him making me believe that everything would be alright, and
him betraying me
. I didn’t believe it was possible to feel a hurt more severe than when I lost my mom. However, my mom didn’t choose to leave me.
He did
. I grab the objects from his outstretched hand and shove them into my purse, abruptly standing on my weakened knees and taking off in the direction of the restroom; leaving him kneeling on the floor, alone.
Once safely hidden behind the door of the restroom, I fall back against the wall; feeling nauseous and dizzy. I breathe in slowly, trying to fill my lungs with air once again. The tears uncontrollably start to fall.
***
(Luke)
My stomach churns and I feel as if I may get sick as I slowly stand up and dust off the knees of my jeans. I realize what a bad idea this is, which is further confirmed when I look into Mikey, David, and Deanna’s horrified faces staring at me. Deanna makes a beeline past me in the direction of the restroom. I swallow hard as I realize the consequences of my actions and take a step in their direction.
“Hey,” I say meekly, my eyes focused solely on David as if we are the only two in the room. David’s disappointed look says everything I already feel.
“David, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have blindsided her like that… I just saw her and… I don’t know…. I swear I had no intentions of seeing her until De had a chance to tell her I was back.” I don’t care that Mikey and this guy Frank are standing here while I apologize. Only David’s opinion matters to me right now.
“Luke, enough. We’ll talk later,” David says, putting up his hand to stop me.
Mikey cuts in, attempting to break the intensity, “Uh… Luke, this is Frank,” he says as if the four of us are meeting up at a friendly golf outing together. I think he may be a bigger idiot than me.
“Hello.” I awkwardly hold out my hand for Frank to shake, which thankfully, he does.
I was feeling like a huge asshole and I’m guessing this guy feels the same way. Mikey begins to ramble about some nonsense that I’m not listening to, but I’m thankful for the distraction. I nod my head as if I’m listening while biting my lower lip so hard I can almost taste blood. What is going on in the bathroom?
***
(Jesse)
“I’m so sorry, JJ. I didn’t think he woul
d—
I’m sorry. I was planning on talking to you tonight to tell you he was back,” Deanna pleads.
I can’t face her, I feel as if I’ve been deceived by all of them. “You knew he was here? How could you not tell me? How could you do this to me? You had to know how this would make me feel,” I manage to choke out as my voice quivers and the tears stream down my face. When I finally raise my head to look at her, her eyes match mine.
“JJ, he told me he would wait until I had a chance to talk to you. He told me he wouldn’t do this here. I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”
“You all knew? Even my dad?”
“I
just
told David before you arrived today. He had no idea Luke was back in town. Luke arrived on Thursday. He wanted to see you right away, but Mikey and I convinced him to wait until after the art show. We didn’t want to upset you before your big night. Last night, he went to the gallery after it had closed. He wanted to talk to you, see your work. He didn’t know about Frank. He saw the two of you together and left before you saw him.”
I could not believe what I was hearing, I can hardly think straight. “You called last night; was he there when you called?”
She lowers her eyes, unable to look at me. “Yes, I’m sorry. He made me call, seeing you with Frank made hi
m—
”
“He has no right! He’s two years too late,” I say angrily, cutting her off. “I want Frank to get me out of here. Tell him to meet me right outside of here. I do not want to see anyone else right now,
only Frank
.” I brush the tears from my eyes and straighten myself up.
“Okay, I’ll get Frank. I’m sorry, JJ, I really am,” she says quietly as she turns to go.
***
(Luke)
My mind is still foggy when Deanna returns, I hear her say, “She wants you.” Relief overcomes me as I let out a deep breath and take a step in the direction of the bathroom.
“Not you…
Frank
,” she says abruptly, placing her hand on my chest to stop me from moving forward. Awkwardly excusing himself, Frank hurries off in the direction of the bathroom.
“Is she okay?” I ask meekly as my jaw tightens.
“What were you thinking? You promised me you would let me talk with her. She is so upset with me, Luke. I am so angry at you right now. She thinks I deceived her… and she’s right,” she says angrily as a tear falls from her eye.
I apologize profusely to all of them, especially David. “I need to tell her how sorry I am, she’s got to know I still love her. Whatever she decides, I promise to leave her alone if that’s what she wants.”
“I know, Luke,” David says. “I know you don’t want to hurt her. I just want to see her happy. If it is you that makes her happy, well then, I want that for her, but if it’s not you that she wants, you need to back off. You have to let her live the life that she chooses.”
“I promise, David. I swear. I can’t live like this anymore. I need to move on, too, with or without her; if that’s what she wants.” I know that is a lie; I can’t move on without her, but I’ll never tell them that. After all, I’m trying desperately to convince everyone that I’m stable now, not some psycho that’s going to stalk her for the rest of her life.
“I need to see her tonight. I don’t care that she’s with this Frank guy. I have to talk to her.”
At first David is reluctant. He thinks I should give her time, but I persistently state my case. Finally, David tells me he understands. I have a feeling it’s because he knows that we belong together. He understands more than anyone that life is too short to waste a minute of it being without the person that means the most to you. Before I hurry off, I promise Deanna that I will fix this and not to worry.
“Luke, try the gallery. Frank probably went there to close up!” Deanna hollers out. “Good luck!”
Chapter 11
(Luke)
It looks as if a storm may come at any minute. The wind is starting to pick up and the sky is turning dark as I jog through the parking lot to my bike. I race in and out of traffic to my house in record time to pick up the car.
I arrive at the gallery and without thinking twice I enter through the smoked glass doors into the lobby. I finally lessen my pace and take a moment to look around and admire the marble floors and the walls trimmed in dark cherry, mahogany wood. The room is surrounded by so many different styles of artwork. She must love working here.
Shit, this is Frank’s business. I almost turn and walk out the door, but staring back at me is one of her paintings. I know it instantly. I also notice three others in the same vicinity. She was always good, but these… are incredible.
“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” a girl asks from behind, startling me.
“Yes, they are,” I answer, turning to face the tall exotic-looking stranger.
“She’s a local artist, these are her first paintings.”
“I have to disagree. I think my walls are covered with most of her first paintings,” I answer, giving her a pain-ridden smile.
She’s about to comment when we are interrupted. “Jazz, this is a friend of Jesse’s; do you mind giving us a minute?” the girl looks at me suspiciously, and then disappears into the back room.
My jaw tightens as I turn to face Frank. “Where is she?” I ask rudely, in no mood for games.
“I dropped her off at home.”
I turn to leave, but he calls out to me, “Luke, can I ask what your intentions are?”
I stop in my tracks and turn to face him eye-to-eye. I want there to be no mistake as to what
my intentions
are. “To get her back.”
“What if that isn’t what she wants?”
“Then I need to hear that from her,” I say conclusively before walking towards the door.
A feeling of regret comes over me. I’m acting like a jerk off to this guy. This guy, who everyone I’m close to seems to really like. He’s not the one to blame, he’s an innocent bystander caught in the middle. “Look. I’m sorry for bursting in here, but we have a lot of unfinished business, and I need to talk to her, she needs to know… I love her. Ya know we’ve been together for a long time?”
“No, Luke, you haven’t been together in over two years, you let her go a long time ago.”
“Not by choice.”
“That’s not the way she sees it.”
“That’s why I need to talk to her. Looking at this…” I point at her paintings that surround me, “somewhat makes me feel a little bit better. Look, I’m not a bad person. I hurt her. I should have found a way to do things differently, but at the time, I knew I couldn’t let her throw her life away waiting for me, and she would have… at least for a while, anyway. She would have never accomplished this if I didn’t let her go. She was ready to give up her scholarship to stay with me. They were talking five years before I got out, maybe longer. At the time, I thought it was the only way. I thought I was doing it for the right reasons.” I slowly turn to walk away, suddenly not sure why I felt the need to spill my guts to this stranger. I walk out of the smoked glass doors, and he doesn’t try to stop me.
My mind is racing with a million different thoughts as I arrive at the next destination, her apartment. I reach in the back seat and grab the shoe box that I grabbed from my bedroom closet. It contains every letter I’ve ever written to her while I was away. Hopefully, she’ll read them someday. Maybe, it will give her some insight as to what was going through my mind at various times throughout my ordeal. Then, she’ll know that whatever I may have been going through at that particular time, my feelings for her were my one constant.