The House of Lyall (21 page)

It was easier for her that way.

The effusive welcome from Miss Esther and Miss Emily the next Sunday – arms flung round her and lips pressed against her cheek – brought tears to Marianne's eyes, and she was glad of Miss Edith's brusque, ‘Come, come, no tears today.' A crushingly firm handclasp, however, revealed that the eldest sister was equally pleased to see her.

After Hamish had been given his share of the greetings, Miss Esther said, ‘Sit down, for goodness' sake, otherwise lunch will be ruined, and afterwards, Marianne, you can tell us how you are coping with your new role in life.'

The girl glanced at her husband uncertainly. Since that dreadful day, he had not referred to their quarrel, yet their relationship was no longer what it had been. There was a constraint between them, not enough to make other people wonder, perhaps, but certainly enough to make her feel ashamed of having lost her temper. Unfortunately, she'd had no chance to apologize, there was always somebody else around – an older man and woman had even followed them into the first-class carriage when they joined the London train at Laurencekirk. She hadn't wanted Hamish to come with her, but he had refused to allow her to travel unaccompanied, and how could she talk honestly about
his
home,
his
servants,
his
father, with
him
listening to every word?

But he was smiling and shaking his head. ‘Thank you, Miss Esther, for your kind hospitality, but I am sure that you did not count on my being here.'

‘It is all right,' she protested. ‘I always make more than enough food on Sundays. My sisters will tell you …'

‘It is true, Hamish,' Miss Edith beamed. ‘Even after having a meal on Mondays from the left-overs, we often have to feed the remains to the dog next door.'

‘If you are sure …?' He sat down now.

Not only had the long-deceased Mr and Mrs Rennie forbidden their daughters to waste good food, they had also taught them that it was extremely bad manners to talk while they were eating, so little was said during the meal, which gave Marianne further space to think. She had hoped to confide her troubles to Andrew later, in the hope that he could advise her on what she might do – Miss Edith shouldn't think it strange if they went for a walk together as they had been in the habit of doing before – but with Hamish here as well …?

No matter how hard she tried, she could think of no way she could get her old friend alone, and finally accepted that she would just have to make the best of her life with no advice from anybody. In any case, maybe Andrew had stopped coming to Strawberry Bank on Sunday afternoons, which would be a relief in the circumstances.

Miss Esther and Miss Emily refused to allow Marianne to help with the clearing up, which provided her with another short respite before giving an account of her time at Castle Lyall, even making her hope, for one brief moment, that they would forget their curiosity, but she knew perfectly well that they wouldn't – not Miss Esther, anyway; she was like a dog worrying a bone when she wanted to know something.

To Marianne's amazement, just as the two younger sisters sat down, Hamish stood up. ‘I am sure you ladies would enjoy your talk much better without a man here, so, if you do not think me rude, I will leave you to it.'

‘Why don't you wait till Andrew comes?' Miss Esther suggested. ‘He always takes a walk on Sunday afternoons, and I am sure he would be glad of your company. He has had to go alone since … since …' She came to a faltering halt, looking to her eldest sister for help.

Trying to set her at ease, Hamish smiled, ‘Ah yes, I had forgotten about Andrew and I have promised to visit a friend for an hour or two. Please give him my apologies and tell him I shall see him when I come back.'

Then, for Marianne, came the biggest stroke of good luck, a virtual miracle, and from the most unexpected source. ‘I do not think Andrew will mind,' Miss Emily said, shyly because it was not often that she took part in any discussion. ‘He can take Marianne with him, like he always used to do.'

‘What a good idea!' exclaimed Hamish, smiling at his wife, who was regarding him doubtfully but nevertheless with a touch of hope. ‘It will be like old times for both of you.'

When he went out, Miss Esther said, ‘Doesn't he mind?'

Miss Edith saved Marianne's face. ‘Why should he mind? Andrew was her friend long before she met Hamish.'

‘Yes, of course.' Miss Esther leaned back, satisfied that all was as it should be. ‘Come on, then, Marianne. We want to hear what the mistress of the castle has been doing, before Andrew arrives.'

Once started, she did not find it difficult, and Miss Esther made it easier by asking about the kitchens, which she had never described in her letters.

‘When I went to find out what happened below stairs, I got my eyes opened,' she admitted. ‘I'd no idea there were so many rooms or so many staff. I thought there would be one chamber maid and one parlour maid, with maybe a couple of young girls to help the cook. I knew there were two footmen, because I'd seen them, and Lord Glendarril has a valet he calls Dick. I thought it was his Christian name, but it turned out to be his last name.'

‘And how many staff are there?' Miss Esther prompted.

‘There's four chamber maids, three parlour maids, and two still-room maids (who make the tea and coffee and snacks for the servants); they all think they're better than the scullery maids, kitchen maids and laundry maids, two of each, and the poor tweeny who's at everybody's beck and call. Mrs Carnie, the cook, and Dick, the valet, consider themselves above the rest and, of course, Miss Glover, the housekeeper, believes she's superior to the lot of them.'

‘You get on all right with her, though?' Miss Esther again.

‘We get on fine, in fact, she's been quite a help to me. It was her that told me what all the different rooms down there were for.'

While Miss Esther tried to count the number of servants, with Miss Emily's help when she forgot one, Miss Edith leaned towards Marianne and said softly, ‘Are things all right between Hamish and you?'

‘What makes you think they're not?'

Her defensive retort confirmed Miss Edith's suspicions, but she did not pry. If the girl wanted to tell her, she would, in time.

Miss Esther asked about the outside staff next, and Marianne told her about the grooms, the stable lads, Carnie, who was Jack of all trades, from driving the family about to doing any odd jobs in the buildings. ‘Then there's Dargie, the head gardener,' she went on. He's got three men under him and two young lads.'

On being asked how many of the staff lived in, she told them who lived in the servants' quarters or over the stables. ‘But a lot of them go home every night. You see, the whole glen belongs to the Bruce-Lyalls, and Lord Glendarril's grandfather or great-grandfather built good solid cottages for the workers on the estate and in the mill, and it's their sons and daughters who get all the jobs that's going.'

She was still holding forth about her dealings with those of the staff she saw every day when Andrew walked in, his somewhat solemn face being transformed by a smile the minute he saw her. ‘I didn't know you'd be here today, Marianne,' he gasped. ‘Nobody told me last Sunday.'

‘Nobody knew last Sunday,' Miss Edith remarked drily.

‘I only wrote on Tuesday,' the girl said, embarrassed by the naked love blazing from his eyes.

Realizing himself that he was being indiscreet, Andrew looked away from her and sat down to accept a cup of tea from his Aunt Esther. ‘How is Hamish?' he enquired in a moment.

‘He's very well, thank you,' Marianne replied. ‘He did come with me, but he'd promised to visit a friend. He said to tell you he's sorry and he'll see you when he comes back.'

For the second time that day, Miss Emily took the bit between her teeth. ‘He doesn't mind if you take Marianne with you on your walk this afternoon, Andrew, and she has plenty to tell you.'

His guard slipping again, he said, his voice practically begging, ‘Are you absolutely sure you want to come with me, Marianne?'

She couldn't tell him that she was desperate to be on her own with him, so she murmured, ‘Of course I am, Andrew.'

‘Don't go too far, then,' cautioned Miss Edith.

Barely able to contain her curiosity, Miss Esther pounced as soon as the young couple left. ‘Why did you not want them to go far?'

Her sister smiled enigmatically. ‘Don't say you didn't notice?'

‘Notice what?' A short pause, then, ‘You mean … she's …?'

‘I am almost sure that she will be a mother in a few months.'

While the Rennie sisters were excitedly discussing this possibility, Marianne and Andrew were walking silently towards the River Dee, he longing to reassure her of his undying love but knowing it was not permissible, and she acutely aware of what he was trying so hard not to say. Although it was into December, it was a bright day and not nearly as cold as it might have been, so Marianne ventured to propose that they find somewhere to sit for a while, and within five minutes they were seated on a fallen tree trunk, sheltered from the strong breeze which had suddenly sprung up.

‘Marianne,' Andrew said before she could utter a word, ‘I know you want to tell me something, but please … nothing personal. I really could not bear to hear –'

‘Please, Andrew, you must listen. I don't know what to do.'

He gave a sigh of resignation. No matter how hard he tried, or how much it might hurt him, he could refuse her nothing. ‘Go on, then.'

She poured out the sad tale of how seldom Hamish had shared her bed and how, since she had told him she was going to have his child, he had not come to her at all. ‘It's awful to feel your husband doesn't love you,' she wailed. ‘I didn't love him when I married him, but I think I'm beginning to love him now, and he doesn't want me, except to … give him an heir.'

Andrew did his best to be objective. ‘You say he has actually … made you pregnant? That seems a complete reversal of what you have just told me.' Unable to continue, he came to an abrupt halt, waiting a few moments before muttering, in despair, ‘Oh, Marianne, I can't discuss this with you.'

Intent on getting advice, she was insensitive to his feelings. ‘I don't see why not. Surely you've come across this sort of situation before? Hamish actually told me he wouldn't mind if I took a lover; he even thinks you
were
my lover at one time.'

A frown crossed her companion's brow. ‘Is that what this is all about? Do you want me to
be
your lover … a secret lover?' He gave a deep groan. ‘I want to be your lover more than anything else in the world, my darling, but not in secret. I would want everyone to know. I would want you to live with me, to prove to the world that the love was not all on my side.' He looked at her keenly, then ended sadly, ‘But it is, isn't it?'

‘Oh, Andrew dear, I'm sorry. I do love you, but just as a good friend, my best friend. I shouldn't have told you anything. It was cruel of me.'

After a pause that told of deep inner turmoil, he said flatly, ‘I did tell you to come to me if you needed help, so … I would advise you to wait until your child is born. That could be the spur Hamish needs; perhaps, although he has had a tendency to be reserved he will be overcome by love for you when you lay his son in his arms.'

Her face had brightened considerably. ‘D'you really think so? Oh, Andrew, I'm glad I asked you; I knew you could tell me what to do.'

He stood up and pulled her to her feet. ‘It is time we went back. It is growing much colder.'

When they returned to Strawberry Bank, Marianne was conscious of Miss Edith looking enquiringly from one to the other of them, and that Miss Esther and Miss Emily seemed to be excited about something, but before any of them spoke, Hamish knocked at the door. It was evident from the easy conversation the two men struck up now that there was no animosity between them, which made Marianne feel rather put out, though she didn't know quite what she had expected.

Shortly after tea, Hamish said they would have to leave, otherwise they would miss the last train home, and Andrew also stood up. ‘I'll walk along with you a bit, if you don't mind.'

His Aunt Edith got to her feet. ‘And I shall come to Justice Mill Lane with you, to stretch my legs before I go to bed.'

Naturally, Hamish and Andrew went in front, and Marianne waited for the question or questions that Miss Edith was bound to ask.

‘Haven't you forgotten to tell me something, dear?'

‘What d'you mean?'

‘Surely you do not intend to keep so important a secret from us, Marianne? When is your confinement to be?'

The girl gave a wry laugh. ‘I might have known
you
would guess. I'm due in March, and I didn't tell you because I was afraid you'd want to give me all the baby clothes in your shop. I don't want that, for Hamish can easily afford to buy everything we need,'

‘Yes, I can understand that he will want to provide for his own child, but Esther will want to make as many things for the infant as she can, and you surely cannot deny her that pleasure?'

‘No, of course I can't.'

‘One last thing, Marianne. I know something is wrong between you and Hamish, so won't you tell me about that, as well?'

‘It's nothing. We'd a bit of a quarrel a few days ago, but it'll soon blow over.'

Miss Edith was frowning now. ‘It is not good to let it run on for long. My mother used to say, ‘Never let the sun go down on your wrath.” She said it was because she had stuck to that rule that her marriage to Father was so happy, and you would do well to remember it, too. In the meantime, I would advise you to apologize to Hamish tonight, then kiss and make up. You will not regret it.'