The Last of the Red-Hot Vampires (13 page)

“I wouldn't be surprised to find out that you're in charge of porn sites on the Internet,” I said, snatching my hand back and turning on my heel to walk back the way we'd come.
I'm on my way.

Overhead, thunder rumbled.

“You are making a mistake, Portia Harding,” Gabriel called after me as I stormed into the stone tunnel. I stopped and looked back at him. He was leaning against a signpost, a knowing smile on his face. I wanted to slap it off.

“How do you know who I am? I didn't tell you my name.”

He laughed, pushing himself off the post to saunter over to me in a blatantly carnal manner. The air grew thick with static electricity. “Word gets around. The latest rumor is about a mortal who had the cheek to get rid of a virtue in order to pardon her boyfriend. I have to admit, I like strong women, women who are not afraid to give in to temptation. I particularly like how they struggle before submitting.” He brushed a strand of hair off my face, his fingers stroking my cheek, leaping backward with a startled look on his face when two thin snakes of lightning struck the ground immediately in front of me.

“You dare!” he snarled, his face turning red as he backed up another couple of steps.

“I'm sorry. I don't seem to have much control over my little storm cloud, but it should be clear to you now that I don't intend to take you up on your…er…offer.” I mentally dismissed my cloud, and was relieved when it dissipated to nothing, the air losing its charged feeling.

“Bitch! You will find that we are not as easy to fool as your lover. The Court takes a dim view of murderers and cheats, Portia Harding.”

There was no reply I could make to that which didn't involved some pretty rude language, not to mention more in the thunder-and-lightning area, so I simply turned around and walked away as fast as I could. I got lost twice despite the signposts and Theo's mental threats to hunt me down, but finally arrived back at the square to confront the furiously scowling vampire of my dreams.

“You can stop looking like that—I didn't leave willingly. I was hauled off by a cherub to go on a tour of the Court.”

His scowl turned blacker as his eyes lightened to a slate grey. I followed as he started off in the opposite direction. “Don't you think you have enough trouble without getting involved with that randy lot? Come along, we don't have time to waste.”

“Where are we going?”

“The library. One of the mares has agreed to meet with you.”

“Excellent. I have much to say to her.”

“I'm sure you do.”

I peeked a glance at Theo, but his face was unreadable.

“Are all the cherubs like the one I met?”

“Yes.”

I bumped my hand against his a couple of times, but he didn't take the hint, so I ended up sliding my hand into his, smiling to myself when his fingers tightened around mine. “You might have warned me, you know.”

“Consider yourself warned: Stay away from the cherubs. They're a heartless group.”

“They certainly don't fit into the idealized vision of angelic,” I said, pondering that point for a few minutes while we walked along the narrow path that ran alongside a tall stone wall. “You said this isn't heaven, but I rather expected the people who hang out here to be more or less good. If the cherubs are such bad news, why are they allowed to stay?”

Theo stood aside as I passed through a narrow wooden doorway. Ahead of us, a building dominated the area. Tall, with high, stained-glass Gothic windows, and pointy spires that seemed to stretch up to the sky, the building looked more like a cathedral than a library. “You have such a black-and-white view of the world, Portia. You're going to have to adjust that to include shades of grey.”

“Meaning, everyone who resides in the Court is not good? I suppose it follows that everyone in Abaddon isn't evil?”

“As you have had proof, having visited it just a few hours ago.” Theo marched forward, to the marble steps that led to wide double doors.

“Touché.” It was cool inside the library, the sunlight beaming through the windows not doing much to raise the temperature. As I gazed around at shelves of books that seemed to be at least fifteen feet tall, I wondered if the climate was artificially controlled. Some of the books that lay open on pedestals appeared to be old, and no doubt fragile. There was a hushed atmosphere of subdued reverence that seemed to seep into my bones, leaving me with a slightly itchy feeling, and the propensity to whisper. “Whereabouts is the mare?”

“This way.” Theo's voice was quieter than normal, making me feel a bit better about my own reaction. He led me to the left, to an area that would have been a small chapel if this had been a cathedral. We wound our way through the maze of books until we came upon a door almost hidden by a rolling ladder that allowed patrons access to the upper shelves.

Theo stopped before the door, fixing me with a dark look. “Although the sovereign does not enforce strict formality in the Court, mares are usually treated with a bit more circumstance than the rest of the officials. They are referred to as ‘your grace' in conversation.”

“I have no intention of being rude,” I assured him. “Credit me with having some amount of tact.”

“You will need more than tact,” he answered rather ominously, knocking firmly on the door.

A voice bid us to enter. Theo stood aside for me to go in first. I will admit that I was beginning to have second thoughts about the wisdom of tackling someone so high up in the Court organization, but a reminder of what I'd cost Theo had me walking into the mare's office with my head high, my back stiff, and my determination immovable.

A young woman in her early twenties looked up from a laptop. She looked like any other successful businesswoman, from expensively dark brown hair, to a smart, jade green suit with matching shoes. “You are Portia Harding, yes?”

“Yes, I am.” Theo, standing beside me, brushed his hand against mine. “Er…your grace.”

“Good.” The mare stood up, raising her voice. “Portia Harding, you are hereby charged with the murder of the virtue named Hope. Bailiff! Take the prisoner into custody!”

“Murder? Hope was murdered? When?” I asked, backing away from the muscular young woman who bowled in through the door. “I had no idea where she went, let alone what happened to her, but I certainly haven't killed her!”

Theo, what's going on here? Murder?

I don't know, but the mare must be handled carefully. This is a serious situation.

You ain't just whistlin' ‘Dixie'!

“I fear there has been a misunderstanding about my client's situation, your grace,” Theo said suavely, positioning himself between me and the bailiff.

The mare stared at Theo for a moment, thawing visibly when he smiled at her.

Oh, that's subtle,
I thought at him.

Subtle doesn't win the fair maiden.

I sent him thoughts of what I'd like to do to him at that very moment.

You are a bloodthirsty little thing, aren't you? You can stop mentally sharpening your neutering knife. I simply mean to win her over to our side, not seduce her.

“You are the champion?” the mare asked, giving Theo a much more thorough eyeing than I thought strictly necessary.

“Theondre North at your service, your grace,” he said, bowing, charm positively oozing off him.

Just see that you don't. I like to think of myself as a generous person, but when it comes to men, I don't share.

Neither do I, but that's not the issue at stake.

I won't say the mare actually cracked a smile, but she stopped looking like she was going to have me gutted on the spot. “One moment, Mathilda,” she told the bailiff before turning back to me. “Am I to understand that you did not seek an audience with me in order to turn yourself in for the crime of murdering the virtue named Hope?”

I lifted my chin and gave her a polite smile. “That's correct. I am here to discuss the continuation of the seven trials I have been forced to undergo. I also wish to discuss the process for submitting a petition. And finally, I want to lodge a complaint about two old ladies who beat me up without due cause.”

The mare's eyebrows rose, her eyes chilly. “I see.”

“I can reassure you that my client is not the type of person who would commit murder for her own gain,” Theo said, moving closer to me in a show of faith. As a gesture, it warmed me to my toes. “She is innocent of the charge you have laid at her feet.”

The mare didn't look at all like she believed him. “And did you take on the role of her champion before or after she summoned the virtue?”

“After, your grace. I discussed the situation with her at some length—”

If you could call almost choking me to death discussing the situation.

Hush.

“—and determined that she summoned the virtue without knowing that she was doing so. The virtue assumed she wished to take on the position, and since she was desirous of leaving, she passed on her powers without Portia being aware of exactly what she was committing herself to.”

“Save your defense for the hearing,” the mare said, gesturing to the bailiff.

The bailiff grabbed my upper arm in a grip that would no doubt leave bruises. Above my head, the cloud began to form.

“Your grace, please, we ask that you recognize the extenuating circumstances of this situation, and grant leniency.” Theo sent the mare another sultry smile.

I'd really appreciate if you could stop doing that.

Saving your life, you mean?

No, sending her those wicked smiles.

Are you jealous?

Not in the least.

There was a pregnant pause during which Theo laughed into my head.

Oh, all right, perhaps a little, but it's justified. I know you're trying to get us out of this situation, but it…oh, never mind. Just get it over with.

“On what grounds do you ask for leniency?” the mare asked, thawing just a bit more under the influence of his smile.

The air grew thick, but not with static. I fought to control my anger, aware that it was triggering the ministorms around me. Once I got my emotions under control, everything would be fine.

I noticed the mare kept her eyes on Theo, not paying me much attention. It irritated me that he was using his masculine wiles to sway her almost as much as it irritated me that I was bothered by that in the first place.

The analytical part of my brain pointed out that I'd only known Theo a few days, and been intimate with him only one day, all of which hardly added up to deep insight into his nature. Oh, sure, we were talking about following the steps to a formal binding, but so far, that was just talk—we hadn't taken the last couple of steps. What if he never intended us to? What if we did, and I found out he was really a jerk? Perhaps he was one of those men who felt it acceptable to flirt with every female. Perhaps he was nothing more than a tomcat, on the prowl for the next conquest. Perhaps he didn't believe in things like fidelity and honor.

Perhaps I needed to stop worrying about Theo's intentions toward me, and cope instead with more important issues, like keeping myself out of heavenly prison.

What if he didn't love me?

The air grew cold around us.

“I ask that leniency be shown to Portia due to her inexperience with Court matters.”

“Ignorance is not suitable grounds for clemency,” the mare said, her voice turning icy as she looked at me.

“I am not ignorant,” I answered, trying to tone down the indignation in my voice.

Tiny little pitter-patter sounds followed a shower of minute hailstones.

Portia, you are not helping the situation.

I'm not doing it on purpose!

The mare looked up at my cloud, then at me, with a look that spoke volumes.

“I'm sorry. I don't seem to have very good control of this whole weather business yet,” I said stiffly, trying to dissipate the cloud. “As for the other, I am simply inexperienced in the ways of the Court. I did not ask to become a virtue, but I have decided, after much thought, that I am willing to take on the job. Since no one bothered to explain to me the rules and regulations governing virtues, I'm pretty much feeling my way blindly here, and would appreciate it if you could recognize that fact.”

Sweetling, you must temper your tone. It is borderline hostile. And stop the hail! It's spreading to the mare's desk.

I'm sorry about that, but I will not stand by while you prostitute yourself in order to get this woman to understand I haven't done anything wrong!

He sighed into my head.
My using a bit of charm on the mare in order that she might understand our point of view has nothing to do with our relationship. You have no reason to feel threatened by other women.

The mare lifted her chin and looked down her nose at me. The hail was growing in size and scope, until the rug in the entire room was covered in a white blanket of ice the size of small marbles. The bailiff looked questioningly at the mare. The latter looked angry.

Portia, stop the dramatics!

I can't! I'm trying to make the cloud go away, but it won't!

I can assure you that the sovereign takes very dim views of people who treat officers of the Court with such antipathy!

The hail came down even harder.

The mare suddenly picked up a book and slammed it down onto her desk. “Cease this display!” she bellowed.

“I can't! I don't know how!” I yelled back, waving my hands desperately as if that would help disperse the cloud over my head.

“Such insolence!” the bailiff said, jerking me back when I moved forward to brush the hail off the mare's desk. “This will not be tolerated.”

“Your grace, please—” Theo started to say, but the mare interrupted him.

She pointed at me, her voice loud enough to rattle the windows in the room, looking like some sort of Nordic goddess as the hail swirled around her. “You are out of control and a danger to others, as well as yourself. For that reason, and that reason alone, I will bypass the justice calendar and commit you to an immediate hearing concerning the charge of murder that has been leveled against you. You will report to Petitioner's Park at Nones. You will not leave the Court without permission. You will not discuss your case with anyone but the appropriate authorities. You will not utilize your Gift without permission. Do you understand what I have said?”

I blinked a couple of times, surprised that she didn't order me clamped into irons and thrown into the nearest dungeon, to be left to rot for a few years before someone remembered me. “I…yes. Thank you.”

The mare took a deep breath. “Now get out of here!”

Reluctantly, the bailiff released my arm.

What just happened?
I asked Theo.

I believe she realized the truth in what we were saying about you not having any experience with the powers of a virtue.

Just because I couldn't control the hail?

Yes. Anyone who intended to become a virtue would have a basic understanding of the role, and better control over those elements in her domain. This may actually be a good thing.
“Thank you for your generosity, your grace.”

The look she gave Theo as he made another bow was enough to raise my hackles, but I gritted my teeth and reminded myself of what Theo had said.

The cloud disappeared as I left the room.

“We really do need to get you through the rest of the trials so you can take control of your Gift,” Theo said in a low voice as he hustled me out of the library.

“You're telling me. When is Nones?”

Theo glanced at the sky. “Another hour. Time enough for us to get some answers…and food. You are hungry.”

“So are you,” I said, aware of the hot need that growled inside him.

“Yes. We will seek the dapifer. This way.”

A dapifer, it turned out, was some sort of steward responsible for caring for visitors to the Court. Or so Theo explained as we met with a small bespectacled man who wrung his hands when we asked for a room and food.

“We don't normally allow nephilim in the apartments, but if her grace said it was all right…”

I bit back the desire to state the obvious about such a ridiculous policy.

“I don't suppose there are any phones here?” I asked instead as the dapifer showed us to a room in the keep that housed the noble apartments. It was furnished in an odd mixture of old and new, with a huge, canopied bed, candles in sconces on the wall, and an armoire that contained a TV, DVD player, and popular video game machine. A small, modern bathroom led off the main room. It was comfortable, though, and I certainly wasn't in any position to comment about the eccentric decorating schemes of the sovereign.

“Gracious me, no, no telephones are allowed! Contact with the outside is strictly prohibited in the Court,” he told me, looking horrified at the very thought. He gave us both a curt little bow. “I will have a meal delivered to you immediately.”

I thanked him, sinking onto the bed with an exhausted sigh as he left. “I wanted to call Sarah and tell her I'd be late, but I guess that's out. Unless your cell phone…” I looked hopefully at Theo.

He shook his head. “Won't work here. Only certain officials are allowed access to the outside world.”

“Damn. I hope Sarah doesn't worry. We were supposed to go to another haunted house tonight.”

Theo stretched, pushing aside a heavy maroon curtain to look out the double-glazed, diamond-paned window. “Time operates differently in the Court than outside. We could be here for days, and only an hour or two would pass outside. Or a year. It just depends.”

“Depends on what? How can the time variable be so diverse?”

“It depends on the whim of the sovereign, I suppose. I knew a man who was here for a few days, and only an hour passed outside. His wife, who was with him, left at the same time only to find three years had gone by in her absence.”

“That doesn't make any sense.” I spent a few minutes trying to calculate the equations necessary for such an impossible thing, but gave it up when a headache bloomed to life. “No, that can't be right. It's not logical at all.”

“Shades of grey, sweetling, shades of grey.”

“Oh, I've been shades-of-greying ever since we met that demon, but that is asking too much. Even here, even in this Court, there has to be an underlying, fundamental structure of physical properties upon which reality is built. To say that no laws keep the structure consistent is impossible.”

“That's where faith comes in,” he said dryly.

I let the matter drop. It didn't do any good to argue with Theo. I was willing to accept that a different set of physical laws applied to the Court, but exist they must. And I was just the person to explore what sort of glue held together this bizarre world I had joined.

“The only other time I was in Court, I was not allowed to stay in the keep,” Theo said after a few minutes of silence.

“Why not?” I asked, pushing aside my concerns to watch him. So many emotions rolled around inside him that I had a hard time separating them.

“I was considered unworthy.” He turned to look at me, a smile on his lips. “If nothing else, sweetling, you have elevated me beyond obscurity.”

I made a face. “I'm willing to bet you would have preferred not being known as the boyfriend of the woman who hailed on a mare.”

“Boyfriend?”

“Well…what's the male equivalent to Beloved?”

“Dark One.”

“That's rather a general-purpose label, not one indicative of a man so completely wrapped around his woman's little finger.”

“Is that what you think I am?” he asked, one eyebrow cocked in inquiry.

I smiled, kicked off my shoes, and slid back on the bed, wiggling my toes in invitation. “Aren't you?”