“I’m going to
have another drink,” he said, lifting the bottle to his lips and sucking down
the warm liquid.
His head was
spinning, but not from the alcohol. He needed Cara. He wanted her. God, how
he wanted her. And not just for a quick roll on the sand. What he was feeling
now was that forever kind of love that made his head lift to the clouds. The
kind of love he never thought he could possibly have room for in his life.
She flashed him
a wicked grin, and she tore the bottle from his hand. “Gimme that. I mean
it.”
He did, too.
He wanted to make love to Cara. It wasn't like it was some great revelation.
Their first kiss all those years ago had rattled them both and he'd wanted to
make love to her then, too. Even though they'd pushed those feelings aside for
their friendship, they were genuine. He remembered that now.
Cara had been
right about one thing. Back then, they were too young and eager to take on the
world. One of them would have had to compromise their dreams if they’d given
in to the youthful passion they’d felt for each other. He saw it now
reflecting back at him like an image in a mirror. If they'd made love then, it
would have destroyed their friendship.
When his father
died and he’d gone back to college, he’d purposely chosen not to call Cara.
Not because he didn’t need her--Lord, he needed her more than ever then--but
because it was the only way to stop the clock and keep what they had preserved
in time. And he and Cara had passed the test of time. This week proved that.
His feelings for Cara were stronger now than they’d ever been.
One of them
would have had to choose and it would have destroy the precious friendship they
shared. But that was all behind them now. They'd both made a success of their
lives professionally.
Although the
thought of Roger touching Cara nearly sent him through the roof back at the
party, Devin didn't believe Roger was any real threat to what was happening
between him and Cara. And there was definitely something incredible happening
between them. But he'd be damned if he could figure out what was wedged
between them now.
“Come on,” Cara
urged. “Tell me.”
He flashed her
a half grin. “Maybe I’ll act as stud for you and become a house husband.”
She giggled.
“You’d last all of five seconds with a dirty diaper.”
His heart
plummeted. “You don’t think I’d make a good father?”
She silently
stared at him, her expression collapsing. He watched her as the flames from
the fire danced in her eyes.
“I’ve been
thinking about a lot of things these past few days. Nothing has made any
sense. Except when I think of you and me.”
Cara’s eyes
dropped to her hands and she nibbled on her bottom lip. “Us?”
“Maybe your
mother has been seeing something that we’ve been afraid to.”
“My mother sees
a lot of things and I’m afraid of them all,” she said wryly.
He chuckled,
but Cara could tell that there was no humor in the tone. Devin was serious.
And she was feeling too good because what he was saying was actually making
sense. She tried to imagine her and Devin having a baby, making love...
But what was
she thinking? What was he thinking? That was an undertow that would only
serve to destroy their friendship.
He inched
closer and she felt his heat as strong as the flames from the fire, even though
they weren’t touching.
“We’re not kids
anymore, Cara. We don’t have to be afraid of what we’re feeling.”
“You’re
delusional,” she sputtered, trying to keep her insides from humming with his
nearness. He was joking, right?
She sat up and
straightened her spine, clearing her throat. “I'm involved with Roger,” she
said, stating the obvious.
“Roger's not
here, Cara. It's only you and me.”
Devin stared at
her. Hot molten desire simmered in his eyes and set her on fire. Maybe it was
the drink, but he was completely transparent now. And he wanted her. She
kicked herself for actually liking that fact, liking the way his eyes caressed
her. What could she possibly gain by making love with Devin? They were
friends. They'd just found each other again after all these years.
She dragged her
gaze away, but not before she saw the hurt register in his eyes. She hadn’t
meant to hurt him. After all, they’d had too much to drink and emotions were
flying high. Tomorrow morning, well after he dried off this wet night, he’d
see that it was just the champagne talking. She wasn’t about to risk losing
their friendship over ridiculous talk of marriage and babies with Devin
Michaels. Not after they’d just found each other again.
She sighed,
feeling an ache deep inside, an ache of unfulfilled need. When she finally had
the courage to look at him again, she saw that his expression had softened.
“Cara.” His
voice floated to her. She could barely hear it over the roar of the incoming
tide. But she saw his lips move and knew he had called her name as if she
could really hear it. Reaching out, he stroked her bare arm with his fingers,
sending a blazing sensation racing through the rest of her body.
Devin pulled
himself from the sand and held his hand out to her. Her head was spinning, but
she knew it wasn’t the champagne. Devin was going to kiss her. He knew it and
so did she. Taking his hand, she lifted herself from the sand like she was
walking on air and fell into his arms, pressing herself against the rock hard
wall of his chest. With his arms wrapped around her waist, he felt good, too
good for her to muster any resolve to pull away.
He didn’t kiss
her at first. His dark eyes, black from the night and his desire, gazed down
at her until she thought he could see the center of her soul. Reaching up, he
touched her lips with his fingers, making her shiver with anticipation.
When his lips
finally crushed against hers, it was with a fury that matched the force of the
ocean, and she rose to meet that fury head on. His mouth was hot and
demanding, tantalizing and delicious. And she wanted all of it. All of him.
She started to
pull away, half wanting to give in to her desire, half wanting to listen to
that little voice of reason telling her she was making a mistake. But Devin
held her tightly to his chest and in his arms, she gave in to her heart.
It would be so
easy to give in fully. So wonderful to take the very pleasure they both wanted
in each other.
Devin tangled
his fingers in her hair and pressed her against his chest. She felt the
urgency of his desire hard against her belly. His heart pounded against her
ear with each labored breath he took.
“Devin,” she
said, pushing with the palms of her hands flat against his chest. His scent
filled her head and belied any strength she thought she had to keep her
distance. Catching her breath, she found the strength to take a few steps
backward. She held her hand in the air in the hopes that Devin would keep his
distance.
The ocean
crashed around them and sounded as thunderous as the hunger that had her on
edge, echoing in her head. The crescent moon was a bright line in the sky. What
little light it cast was drowned out by the crackling fire.
What the hell
had she done? She was kissing Devin Michaels. And she was loving every second
of it! Wanting more of him.
A strange sense
of excitement intermingled with regret gripped her. She’d never felt this way
with anyone before, least of all Roger. No one had ever made her head spin or
her heart beat like a wild stallion on a run.
But Devin
had.
“I won’t say
I’m sorry for kissing you.” Devin’s voice was rough and sexy, filled with a
need she felt.
“We shouldn’t
have done that,” she finally muttered.
Bruno’s tail
slapped on the sand, cutting into her thoughts. She looked at the dog, lazily
reclined on the sand next to an empty impression that Devin’s body had made,
and imagined her impression right alongside it.
“You felt that
kiss just as much as I did and still do. It was just as powerful as when I
kissed you on the carousel that Fourth of July.”
He took a step
closer and reached out to touch her arm, but she pulled away. The pained
expression on his face when she did nearly broke her heart.
She averted her
gaze.
“And it is just
as powerful seventeen years later. A flame like this never dies, Cara.”
She cleared her
throat and took a deep breath, hoping to find some strength when she swung
around to meet his gaze. But when she did, she realized she’d found none.
“I can’t do
this, Dev.”
“Why not? You
and me-”
“No!” She held
her face in her hands and shook her head. This wasn’t supposed to be
happening. All these feelings, whirling around her, completely out of
control. She was out of control.
“Don't you
see? We’re drunk, Devin. I won’t risk losing this friendship again because I
swallowed too much drink.”
She had to get
out of there. Not just because her whole body was numb from the champagne, but
because it wasn’t. She was very much alert and aware of every sensation Devin
had managed to bring to life with his kiss. She wanted him, and if she stayed
there much longer, she was going to forget her own name and make love to Devin
right there under the stars.
“Don’t run away
from me,” he said, his eyes almost pleading with her.
“I’m not,” she
said, picking her white sandals up from the sand. “I’m trying to keep us from
making a bigger mistake if I stay. Tomorrow, you’ll see that I’m right.” She
only hoped she’d feel that way, too.
Devin didn’t
follow her as she spun around and quickly made her way along the edge of the
beach. She blinked hard to see through her tears until she could finally focus
on the porch light of her parents’ home. When she did, she began to run.
Placing one
bare foot on the wooden porch step, she glanced up at the window of her brother
Manny's room. It was dark. All the windows downstairs were dark, too. The
party was over, everyone had gone home, and Roger was fast asleep.
Yes, she was
sure Roger was sleeping like a baby. Unlike Devin, Roger wouldn't feel jealous
of her spending time with another man. As she yanked on the screen door, she
couldn't help but wonder what, if anything, Roger would have felt if he'd seen
that kiss.
# # #
He’d been hit
by a train.
Devin was sure
of it as he held his throbbing head and fought to pry his eyelids open. It was
the only logical reason for his head feeling as though it were crushed like an
over-ripe cantaloupe. Not only did he have the lack of brains to polish off
the rest of the champagne he and Cara been drinking on the beach, he’d slumped
on the sofa with Bruno at his feet and polished off the last of the beer in the
fridge. The sledge hammer hitting his skull was punishment for his stupidity.
Serves him
right, going after Cara the way he did in a drunken stupor. How could she take
his feelings for her seriously if she thought she was only a drunken roll in
the sack? She deserved more than that. So much more than he’d given her last
night.
That kiss.
God, it still seared him to the core with its memory. How could he think a
passion like that could dissolve with time? It had been like dynamite
detonating inside him.
They’d always
been friends as kids. In his memories of her, they'd always maintained that
their relationship was based on friendship, even after that one scorching kiss
they'd shared.
Damn, what an
idiot he’d been! He’d been deluding himself all this time. If he was at all
honest with himself, he’d admit that he wasn’t falling in love with Cara now
for the first time. He’d always been in love with her. Except back then, it
scared him to death. It still scared him, but it was different. He wasn't a
kid trying to take on the world anymore.
And Cara had
grown into an impossibly beautiful, sexy woman.
He swung his
legs off the bed until they hit the floor with a thud. Trying to steady
himself, he buried his face in his hands, shielding the light from his eyes.
God, his head hurt.
Damn champagne,
damn beer, damn...Roger.
His already
aching gut twisted. He’d never felt this way about any woman he’d been
involved with before. He was always much too busy to care whether the
relationship lasted beyond being a simple distraction to his work.
But this wasn’t
just any woman. This was Cara. And there were no words to describe what she
meant to him.
Cara had said
she wanted to save their friendship. But deep inside, he knew she wanted him
as much as he wanted her. They would have made love last night and it would
have been wonderful. And instead of waking up with a colossal hangover, he'd
be cradling Cara's warm naked body in his arms right now.
Why was she
being so stubborn? Why couldn't he get her to believe that everything about
them was a perfect match?
He couldn’t do
this alone. No, he’d have to employ some heavy hitting troops to win this
battle. The best in the field. And he knew exactly who to go to for help.
* * *
Cara sat on the
edge of the bed, still nursing a cup of coffee and hoping the two aspirin she’d
taken would hurry up and kick in. “Are you sure you want to leave?”
“Yes,” was all
Roger answered.
She sighed.
She’d hoped that sleep would have changed things for both of them. But it
hadn’t. She was glad this week with Roger was over.
“Don’t be
disappointed. We can go to Nantucket another time. Maybe after your parents
leave for Florida.” The little snicker in his voice didn’t escape her.