Can't Stay Forever
Trent had been working on a snow plow idea with Matt. The idea was that we would hook it either to the Hummer or the SUV and have it run the lead position. It would clear the path for the rest of us to follow. In the mean time the scout team, which was made of Tyreese, Lucas, and myself continued to get food and siphon gas so when we found the break in weather and had the plow ready we could leave.
Jody came up to me after we got back and had put the days collection in the trailer. "Cali," she began, "we have a lot of good stuff going on here. Why is everyone chompin' at the bit to leave?" She looked tired. Dark circles lined her eyes. JJ wasn't a fan of sleep. I knew this because he would go off every night, several times a night. I had the luxury of being able to roll over and go back to sleep. Jody didn't. She sighed and brushed a stray strand of hair off her face. "Why are we fighting so hard to keep going to a place that may not be any better? If there are places like this here then there will be places like this elsewhere. We could just hop from one to the next."
"I had that thought, too," I admitted, "but I keep coming back to how unsustainable this place is, how the house hop way would just be harder the longer we do it. This place is great but when the food and propane run out, this place will be a tomb. I think we should keep going until we find a place that we can build some sustainability in. Places like this are an awesome stop gap, but that's all it is."
"How do you know Idaho will be better?" Jody challenged.
"I don't. I figure worse case we keep moving after we find Trent's family. Maybe settle in Canada or something. Find a place we can farm and keep the kids safe. When we get to where we are going, we build great walls, put in crops of vegetables, stuff like that. We are in our modern-day pioneer trek. Instead of a covered wagon, we have a semi."
"I feel really hopeless, Cali. I feel like we are drowning here. I can't help but wonder what's the point to any of this."
"Jody," I started, "you've got a lot on your plate right now. I bet that the idea of going back on the road is hard. I gotta ask, though, are you having thoughts of doing something stupid? I see it all over your face that you are barely treading water." There. I said it. She looked up at me and while she said that she hadn't been, the look on her face said she had. I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her tightly. At first her body was stiff in my arms then she melted into me and cried.
After she recomposed herself she chuckled and said, "Postpartum depression. It's a bitch all on its own. Add zombies and struggling to live? Not fun."
Mercedes wandered over to us, her face was also lined with exhaustion. "I heard you two talking. I wasn't eavesdropping or anything, just getting some air. I was wondering though, how well did you guys do on supply scavenging?"
JJ started to cry from inside the house so Jody excused herself and went back inside to feed him.
"Not too bad actually. There were a few houses that were prepared for a major snowstorm at the least and a couple sheds that were filled with the freeze dried foods to last a year for each person. We have another block to go still." I replied, not sure where she was going with this. I didn't have to wait for long though.
"I'm glad Jody went back in because I wanted to talk to someone without there being an audience on this one. You see, I've been praying on this a lot. I've been thinking that this could be a good town for me to raise Kyle and Annali. It's off the path and protected. I think the answer to the prayer is in the last block of homes. If there is enough to feed us for at least a year in those homes alone, then I think it is an answer we should stay."
"Mercedes, I have to say I hate this idea. Flat out hate it. I do not want to strand you in some little town. I don't think that being here will help. Really, what good would a year do you?"
"It would buy me some time to provide a stable environment for the kids. It would get them into a home. It would get me off the road because being an older person bouncing around in a car in the cold has not done nice things to my joints. It's a little better now since I'd been sleeping in a bed. I'd like to see what we find though before really deciding this, if you guys would be willing to let me cut into your finds."
I took a deep breath to quiet my head that was screaming out loudly to not even entertain this idea. There was no reason for us to split up. I looked Mercedes in the eyes to try to read how important this was to her. She had an earnest look on her face that could not be faked. "Let me talk to the others and see what we can do," I said after a bit of a pause, "this is just too big of a decision to make on my own."
"I understand. Let me know what everyone says." Mercedes reached out and gave me a hug before she went back to where it was warmer. I heard sounds of tools clattering from the barn so I went off to see who all was inside. I found Trent and Matt working on their project. I asked them if they had seen Tyreese. Trent told me that he had been checking on the cars, seeing if they needed any fluids. I asked Matt to find Lucas and come back here while I got Tyreese for an emergency meeting. Matt and Trent both gave me a questioning look as I turned around to get Tyreese.
Within five minutes we were all back together. I gave them the rundown of what Mercedes had proposed. Their initial reaction was the same I had, an adamant “no way”. After the initial reaction had settled down, Tyreese was the first to talk.
"I'm thinkin' maybe we should see if it could be done before we say no. We should collect everything and put it in the barn. Let her see what sort of stock she would have to work with. If after everything she still wants this then who are we to force her?"
Tyreese was right, but I had to object. "Really, Ty? Leave her? What if what happened in the complex happens here? How is she supposed to defend herself and the kids?"
"Well, it's not like we would just leave her to the wolves. We'd give her guns and cross bows. We'd make sure her car was ready to go. She also wouldn't be exactly alone. Kyle has become quite a mature kid who knows his way around a small rifle and can shoot with the compound bow better than I can. I bet you he could have competed with that thing had the world not fallen apart." Tyreese had a cool head when it came to these heavy issues and I valued his insight. He was very right, it was not a case of dropping her off in a forest with a pair of toddlers. If this did happen it would be because we left her with appropriate supplies. We would make sure she had a few escape plans, and of course, directions on how to find us again.
Mercedes
Trent opted to stay back to keep working on the plow project in the barn. Lucas, Tyreese, and I bundled up to face the outside world again. We trudged through the snow with heavy hearts. No one said a word as we considered what Mercedes had proposed. I wondered if we could, in good conscience, leave her behind in a place we knew was not sustainable. I considered her age and what a difference a year could make. I worried about how Kyle and Annali would manage if something happened to her. At the same time I wondered if I could, force her to do something I knew she didn't want to do.
I found myself hoping we'd find nothing in these houses so she would have to come with us. I toyed with suggesting that we should say there was too little to Lucas and Tyreese but understood that we all needed to have the right to land where we wanted to. Just because Trent and I were going to Idaho didn't mean everyone else was going to want to, and it seemed that to Mercedes, this was home.
The first house we came to was a small place with maybe two weeks worth of supplies. I felt bad because my first reaction was to be happy there was so little. The next house had a lot more, another place with a storage shed full of freeze dried food and packets of water. The following house looked to have been evacuated in a rush with all the good supplies missing. With four homes left it looked as though the option for her to stay was questionable. We found the first house stocked to survive the winter, the next for a bit longer, the third for much less. It all came down to this one last place.
We stood in front of the house for a moment. It was one of those moments where if we didn't open the door then she couldn't have the option to leave us. No one wanted to lead the way until Tyreese finally took the reins.
Tyreese turned the doorknob to find it secured. The door frame had glass panes on the sides. He located a large rock and slammed it through the little window. Glass sparkled as it caught the sunlight and fell with a soft tinkle. He reached his arm through the opening and turned the dead bolt with a loud thud. With another rattle of metal the doorknob was unlocked. After he pulled his hand out of the broken pane, he rested his hand on the knob a moment before he turned it. With a deep breath he rotated the knob and pushed the door open.
He stepped forward with his jaw set and eyes serious. We followed behind him. The smell of death hung heavy in the still air of the room. Flashlights clicked on and the beams crossed over each other in the living room. Tables had been knocked over in what looked like a struggle. There was a very large bloodstain on the sand colored carpet. A bloody hand print was smeared on the wall. A thumping sound echoed down the hall and we spun to face the noise. All the doors were closed but one noticeably moved with each thud. We were not alone in this house. Lucas had his sword ready. I loaded the crossbow as Tyreese slipped down the hall.
When Tyreese pushed the door open a very thin and hungry female zombie stumbled out. She had a major wound where her neck met her shoulder that was likely the source of where all the blood in the living room was from though with the amount of bites taken out of her it was hard to tell. It was cold in the house and that seemed to slow it up significantly. It was followed by a male who was equally slow and emaciated, though he had significantly less wounds on him, which told me that he brought home the zombie bug then fed on her. They seemed to be easily distracted by the three live bodies in front of them and we used that to our advantage. I made a lot of movement to attract their attention while Lucas and Tyreese snuck up on them.
With the zombies taken care of, we started checking out the house for supplies. At first glance we were not impressed. All the work we had just done to kill those two zombies was just for a handful of condensed soup cans. From the back door window I saw that there was a detached garage and a shed. I hoped maybe we would at least find a can of gas.
We walked outside and went to the shed first. Assorted yard tools were hung neatly on pegs and a shiny lawn mower with a small gas can sitting next to it. I picked it up and found it half full. This was so not worth the effort.
Lucas walked around the garage to see if there was a window or something to see what was inside. The only indication that there might be something inside was the lock on the door. It was like the kind you found on self storage units. Lucas had brought along bolt cutters for just this sort of thing.
Before the end of the world there was a semi popular show on TV that was all about preparing for some scenario that would bring on the apocalypse. This garage could have been featured on it. I wondered how a house that was so prepared for a super disaster could have had the occupants fall victim to the zombies. I guess it goes to show that zombies were truly the last thing anyone thought could happen.
There was so much food and water in this place alone that Mercedes and the kids could easily last for a few years. There were gas and wind generators for power, tanks of propane, medical supplies, and weapons with appropriate ammunition. If we secured everything for her I could see them comfortably surviving. "Well, guys," I said, "let's tell Mercedes what we found." Even though I still didn't want her to go I was so much more comfortable in knowing she had all this to work with.
We found her in the mud room doing a load of laundry when we got back. We told her about everything we found. She nodded soberly and said, "Well, I do believe God gave an answer. I'm going to have a talk with the kids." I gave her a reassured smile.
"Let us know how that goes. We're here for you for what ever you need." I said with more of a brave tone than I felt.
That night at dinner Mercedes broke the news of her plan to everyone. She explained that she discussed the idea of staying with the kids and they were on board. She told everyone that she had talked with a couple of us about how if there were enough resources in the last block she would be able to keep them. She told the group that the supplies discovered could easily cover a family of three for at least a year, and that she planned on a reassessment whether or not to stay if things looked like they were going to go bad. A chorus of objections rang out, some more vocal than others. Some of the group saw Mercedes right to choose as a good thing, which spawned arguments. After a few minutes of the arguing Jody leaned into me and whispered, "Cali, you need to do something. You need to say something for her."
I knew I did. I stood up and started to get the attention of everyone. My voice was drowned out in the mix of voices. Finally I yelled out, "Stop. Now!" Everyone looked at me with irritation for interrupting their argument. I rolled my eyes at them. "Damn, you all sound like you're trying to have a flame war in a chat room. Just stop. How would you all feel if we forced you to go to someplace you didn't want to be, or ripped you out of your comfort zone? What if you were taken someplace against your will? We don't behave that way. I will not be party to holding someone hostage. Mercedes comes to her family about the prospect of staying behind, and her family responds like this? With snitty arguments? We are going to respect her wishes. We are going to do everything in our power to make this a safe place for her and we are going to put these opinions on the shelf for her sake."
Slowly everyone came around to the logical side of the situation letting go of the emotional side.
"We need to brainstorm ideas to keep Mercedes and the kids safe. The floor is open to suggestions." Trent said; which opened the doors for people to get past their issues.
Tyreese offered the first suggestion, which got the ball of creativity rolling. I think that the example he displayed since the beginning of all this was calming to me and everyone else as well. "We probably need to start with securing the house. I want to board up the windows, but I don't want to make it so she is blind to a hit. If we set it up so she has a view slot in every room window where she could line up a rifle or whatever then she can take a shot without opening up anything."
There were some nods. Jody asked, "Where will she be storing her supplies? There is no way to keep everything someone needs for a year in the house." Trent suggested that one of the rooms be turned into some supply storage but explained that ultimately the rest would have to be in the barn. "Well, maybe then we need to create a walk-way that keeps out weather and zombies." Jody suggested. Trent loved this idea and I could see him already building the place in his head.
"Know what we should do?" Lucas asked. "We should set up a search and destroy while the zombies are frozen. We know the houses are clear now, so we need to check the churches and any businesses. We need to check the streets and kill them now while they can't overrun us. Make sense?" I loved this. It was a proactive way to help the safety levels. Obviously we were not going to be able to kill them all, but any dent we could make had to help.
DaWayne had been quietly taking in the discussion. "She needs a bug out plan. You know, just in case things get bad. Not saying it will, but that was a scary lesson we had to learn back home. Maybe we should put the car in the barn, pointed in the right direction so all she has to do is go forward to go. Her trunk should be fully packed with stuff." Tyreese walked over to where DaWayne was and put his hand on DaWayne's good shoulder. He stood by his son with pride beaming on his face.
I smiled. "These are great ideas. I think we should get started on them in the morning. They are likely to take some time to get them all done, but we've proven we can work together and get things going."
We finished eating our dinner together, pleased to have a plan in motion. People talked about the project they wanted to be a part of., and as we went to bed, people thought about the plans they wanted to see in motion.
The next morning people went to work on their plans with a buzz of activity. Pencils and pens scratched across paper as they drafted their plans. Tyreese wanted to get started on making sure the barn was totally secured from the outside world. He plotted how to make the big doors on the barn secure, yet easily opened from the inside, in case she needed to run. He was taking her mobility under serious consideration. He didn't want it to be so secure that she couldn't work the latches but not simple enough that just anyone could walk in.
Matt and Trent were drafting plans on the walkway. They talked about how the top part should be steeply angled so snow wouldn't collect on it, but more importantly, so a person couldn't walk on it without a struggle. Trent was also working on the snow plow project so he was going in between projects. The boys wanted to be a part of this project as well so Matt directed them into the areas that they could help like nailing wood panels together to forms walls of the walk-way.
Trisha and Tanya took the reins on the house security measures. They had Mercedes go up to each window and set the low board to just below her line of sight. They placed heavy curtains at the windows to block out any light from coming through at night showing that this place was occupied. No attention was the best attention these days.
Lucas and I were on zombie patrol. There was no other team that I wanted to be on more than that one. If my world was going to be crazy and unmanageable then I was going to find my zen somewhere, and beating the crap out of zombies sounded right up my alley.
After the plans were drafted, everyone was busy gathering materials and setting up their part of the project. Tyreese and Matt went to the neighbors houses and ransacked the workshops and garages for tools and building materials. Life in Scipio must have been dull because woodworking seemed to be the sole source of entertainment for the men. When we were scavenging for goods I noticed almost every house had some sort of sewing room for the women, furnished by home-made sewing tables probably made by their husbands. The sewing rooms were the women's workshop to keep them occupied. Gender roles were set here.
While the others were setting up their projects, Lucas and I were getting ready to go on our macabre Easter egg hunt. I took my hand gun and one of the rifles, as well as my newly crafted machete. I kind of wanted to see if it worked as well as I thought it should. I was bundled up in a few layers to keep me from freezing while we were on our hunt. Layers were handy because you could peel a few off if you got too warm. I handed Lucas one of the probes that I built and we set off down the road. I felt like we were going on a quest to find a needle in a haystack. For a while we walked in silence, mostly because we didn't know each other well. I didn't know what to say to him, and he didn't know what to say to me. We tried to make small talk but each little burst was short lived. We poked and prodded at the silvery sparkling snow. It seemed weird to want to find zombies, rather than our usual avoidance tactic. We learned something doing this; zombies tended to travel in packs. It was rare to find only one by itself. I wondered what that meant; was it coincidence that they were found in clusters, just several responding to the same noise, or did the virus that turned them into a member of the living dead prefer company?
My machete worked well. It sliced through the skull easily enough. For the first couple of zombies that we found, I watched them as I pulled out the weapon. They had no recognition of any potential danger that they were in. Their eyes were searching for food, not self-preservation. Right until the blade penetrated their brain matter, even frozen in place like they were, they were hunting with the never ending snapping of their jaws.
Lucas seemed to be taking this job with a heavy heart. He looked like he was working hard at reconciling each sword strike with himself. I wondered what was going through his head, what could possibly be giving him so much pause. It hit me finally. "Who did you lose?" I asked softly.