The Suicide Project (Rebirth Book 1) (39 page)

Leaning forward in my seat, I caught Harper’s eye and winked at her while she bobbed her eyebrows suggestively at me. It kind of wasn’t fair for her to meet Wyatt under these circumstances, especially when she couldn’t see his real face in all his virile glory.

Sam jabbed me sharply with his elbow on my left side, and I realized that both he and Gideon were staring at me and were aware of the byplay. Gideon had a frustrated expression on his face, and I realized that once again, I managed to hurt his feelings without meaning to. We really needed to have a private chat later. But now was not the time.

My eyes drifted back to the arena floor when Sergeant Flynn cleared his throat. Guiltily, I met his gaze and he gave me a stern look before continuing with the details of our test. “We have three bulls for you to ride which you will each take turns riding.” One of the rodeo clowns ran off to the side and returned leading a massive black bull with one white hoof. “This black beauty is named Thundershanks.” The rodeo clown led Thundershanks to an enclosed pen off to the side, which I assumed was where we would be mounting the bulls before the gates opened.

The second rodeo clown ran out of view, presumably to retrieve the second bull while Sergeant Flynn continued his introductions. “This guy is named Buttcracker Sweet….or BS for short.” There were twitters all around at the goofy name the bull had been given, and the laughter helped to break the tension that was starting to mount within the arena. Buttcracker was all brown in color, and I wondered if there might’ve been a story to go along with the name this bull had been given. He was led into his own pen, while the third rodeo clown ran to fetch the last bull.

Out came a black and white spotted bull, and this bull looked the most formidable out of the three. He stomped the ground with his hoof and snorted loudly, as Sergeant Flynn announced his name. “This last bull is named Stomperosa.” Once the last bull was penned along the far arena with the other two, we saw that Sergeant Kami was holding a red plastic container which she was shaking.

“You guys will be going in random order by lottery, in groups of three. While one person is taking their test on the arena floor, the other two bulls will be mounted with a rider while they each wait their turns on the floor. Each of you will only get two tries per day, and we will be having Test Day every Friday from here on out, indefinitely. Now, it’s time to draw names for the first three riders for Round 1!” The excitement in Sergeant Flynn’s voice was obvious as Sergeant Kami opened the top of the plastic container and withdrew the first name.

“The first rider of the day is….Kyrie!” There was complete silence as all eyes turned towards sweet, innocent little Kyrie.
Oh shit!
I carefully slapped on my poker face as Kyrie instinctively turned in my direction, seeking me out for guidance. Sergeant Ramsey, who was still standing beside me, nudged me gently with his knee as he commanded, “Go escort Kyrie over to where the bulls are penned. See if you can calm her fears down, okay girlie?”

“You got it, old man.” I stood and made my way halfway down the bleachers to where Kyrie was standing. The faint tinkle of Mercer’s dog tags was a relief as I realized he had followed me. His presence might also help to calm down her nerves. When I stopped directly in front of her, I looked down at her face and saw that she had a determined expression pasted on, although the full body tremble betrayed her true emotions. She was scared. I turned to face the arena and crouched down in front of her, ordering, “Hop on, Shorty!”

Standing, I made my way down to where Amos and Sergeant Honda waited with the three rodeo clowns. I figured it was their job to help the riders mount, and to give last minute words of encouragement. Whispering for Kyrie’s ears only, I said, “I believe in you, Kyrie. No matter what happens here today, remember that you are loved. I will stand by you, to cheer you on, and to remind you not to give up. No matter how many times each of us might have to take this test…we are
not
quitters, okay? Let’s remind each other to stay strong and persevere. Just do your best. Nothing else matters.”

Kyrie wiggled on my back, signaling that she wanted to be put down. Wrapping her arms around my waist, she buried her face in my side as she squeezed me tight. I rubbed her back for a moment, but the hug ended as quickly as it began. When next she turned her face up to meet my gaze, she had an angelic smile there. Catching hold of my left hand, she swung it back and forth as we strolled towards Amos where he waited to boost Kyrie onto BS.

Both Sergeant Honda and Amos were coaching and guiding her on how to sit, and how to grip the strap that went around the bull. “Why can’t I hold on with two hands?” Kyrie’s plaintive question caused the corners of Amos’s mouth to twitch in amusement.

Suddenly, Wyatt was there at my side. I wouldn’t have been able to tell it was him at all if it weren’t for the green glitter of his eyes. That and the involuntary shiver of awareness that overcame my body every time I was in his presence. He held my gaze, a small smile flirting from his mouth as he leaned forward to give his own piece of advice to Kyrie. Finally transferring his attention to Kyrie, he said, “Make sure to lean back when BS jumps. The key is to maintain your balance and hang on to the strap with all your might, for as long as you can. Once you hear the buzzer sound, loosen your grip and dismount. If you start to fall, one of the clowns will catch you, so never fear little one.”

Kyrie’s mouth was hanging open as she just stared back at Wyatt, seemingly as mesmerized as I had been the first time I had met him. Wyatt’s smile grew bigger as he saw that he had rendered young Kyrie speechless.

“Nod your head if you understood my instructions.” Immediately, Kyrie’s head bobbed forward in understanding. Flicking one last caressing glance at me, Wyatt hopped over the fence and was gone. Instantly, Kyrie seemed to snap out of her trance as she leaned closer to stage-whisper to me, “Is that the guy you were talking about the other night when we had our pool party? He
is
hot!”

Amos and Sergeant Honda were still both
right there
, and I had to close my eyes momentarily as a feeling of mortification came rushing up to burn my cheeks at their quiet chuckles. There was also no doubt in my mind that Wyatt had heard Kyrie’s innocent observation.

To save face however, I retorted breezily, “I dunno… I don’t really like clowns. I find them
extremely
creepy.” To my satisfaction, there was a slight falter to Wyatt’s step on his path to the far pen where Thundershanks awaited.

In the background, while Wyatt had been talking to Kyrie, I had heard Sergeant Kami announce the names of the other two finalists for the Round One ride. Hearing footsteps approaching, I turned my head and saw Gabe walking towards us with Aidan trailing behind him. Making eye contact, I smiled and nodded at Gabe as I said, “Good luck Gabe!”

In an attempt to bury the hatchet, I made eye contact with Aidan as he was walking past, and the surprise on his face was comical when I said, “Good luck out there Aidan.” He just stared at me for a moment as if trying to gauge whether or not I was being sincere. Whatever he saw in my eyes must’ve reassured him as he mumbled back, “Thanks.”

Looking up, I saw that Sergeant Ramsey had led the congregation closer to the “bull pens”, and I smiled in greeting when my friends took seats all around me. Kyrie smiled bravely when everyone (except Zima and Leif) cheered for her and wished her good luck. Suddenly, Sergeant Kami came back on the microphone and announced, “Let’s set the clock for five seconds please. Rodeo clowns, at the ready!”

Everything was happening so fast, and I suddenly felt my heart leap in my throat in fear for little Kyrie. She looked so small and cute and
totally
out of place on that big beast, especially with her pink sneakers and pink raglan shirt with the narwhal on the front. When she glanced again at me for reassurance, I flashed her the thumbs up sign and smiled wide, trying to hide my fear for her welfare. It worked as the look of determination reentered her eyes.

The horn sounded and suddenly the gates were opened, and out darted Kyrie atop Buttcracker. The bull kicked and bucked, jumping high in the air in an effort to dislodge Kyrie’s slight weight. To my surprise, Kyrie started shrieking in laughter as she was spun around and around. Just that fast, it was over, and the buzzer sounded to announce her ride was over.
SHE DID IT!!!
Getting off the bull was another matter entirely. One rodeo clown yelled at her to let go of the strap, and when she finally summoned the courage to do it, she was bucked off at the next jump and went flying through the air. One of the clowns moved with lightning speed and caught Kyrie before she could hit the ground. The sound of her exhilarated laughter had us all laughing along with her in relief.

Sergeant Ramsey was jumping up and down in excitement, thoroughly enjoying the “show”. Turning to face us, he beamed as he chuckled, “See? Nailed it on the first try!! If she can do it, I know y’all can do it too!” He started clapping and stomping his boots on the bleacher steps as Kyrie came jogging back towards the seating area. The rodeo clowns herded BS back into his pen to await the next rider.

When Kyrie reentered the row of bleachers where I was seated, she ran to me and threw her arms around me in a great big hug, giggling the entire way. “I did it Teagan! Did you see me?” She was grinning from ear to ear, the excitement sparkling clearly in her eyes.

“Good job, sweetheart! I knew you could do it! I’m so proud of you!”
Thank God I don’t have to sit through that again.
I realized that even though I was practically beside myself with excitement for
my own
turn, when it came to the others, I would probably be a nervous wreck too. In the short time that I had gotten to know them, I had really come to like and respect the majority of my comrades in the program. And even though I wasn’t close with everyone yet, I still didn’t want to see
anybody
get hurt. Due to the nature of these trials, it was inevitable that someone at some point was going to suffer an injury. It was why Jamie and Doc Duffy waited on the sidelines with their medical equipment at the ready.

Our attentions all jerked to the side when Sergeant Flynn announced that it was Gabe’s turn to ride. “Set the clock for 8 seconds. Clowns at the ready!” The sound of the horn blared through the arena as the gates opened. Out shot Gabe atop Stomperosa, and once again, everyone shot to their feet as the adrenaline within the arena reached a crescendo. Possibly, it might’ve been due to Gabe’s obvious panic at finding himself atop a real live bull, but he got bucked off at only 3 seconds in. The expression of relief on his face at being safely within the bleachers again was pretty funny, and the other guys couldn’t resist giving him a good-natured ribbing.

When Aidan’s turn came, he looked startled when others started cheering for him too. The positive vibe of sportsmanship reverberated around the tent, and I was gratified when I saw him give a slight nod of acknowledgement before his gate opened.
Maybe there’s hope for him after all
. The cheering for him was loud because he got bucked off at 7.4 seconds.
So close!!

The names for Round 2 were called in order of Gideon, Zima, and Marisol bringing up the rear. Gideon was pumped up for his ride and hardly needed any encouragement. Nevertheless, as he was passing by to approach the bull pen, I reached out and squeezed his shoulder in a show of support as I murmured, “You got this!” The clock was set for 15 seconds, and everyone held their breath as they watched Gideon on the arena floor atop Buttcracker. His muscles flexed as he seemed to effortlessly manipulate his body to sway with the movements of the bull’s bucking. His ride was truly a beauty to watch.

When the buzzer rang signaling that the 15 seconds was up, everyone cheered wildly. As he climbed back into the bleachers and approached where I stood with Kyrie and Sam, his smile practically lit up the entire room. Catching my eye, he held out his arms as he joked, “Do I get a hug too?” Because he asked so cutely, and partly because I didn’t want his feelings to get hurt, I reached up to give him a hug but squealed with surprise when he lifted me off the ground and twirled me around.

My eyes met everyone else’s over Gideon’s shoulder, as they watched the entertainment that Gideon was ignorantly providing. I felt my cheeks burn when Gideon lingered with his hug much longer than was necessary. Swatting at his shoulder, I said, “Alright, time’s up. Hugs should only be three Mississippi’s in length.” Sam rolled his eyes at me as he snorted in amusement.

Laughing in exhilaration as he released me, he commented, “Whew! What a total rush!”

We all heard Logan in the background as he mumbled teasingly, “Are you referring to the bull ride or the hug?” Sergeant Ramsey tried to muffle his laughter but was unsuccessful, and his shoulders shook with his mirth. In an effort to get everyone’s attention off me and back onto the arena floor, I said, “Come on guys, get your heads in the game. It’s Zima’s turn.”

The clock was reset for 8 seconds, and everyone turned their attention back to the next ride. I felt bad for Zima because although she tried to hide it, she was even more terrified of the bull ride than Gabe was. It was obvious in the way her eyes were bugging out of their sockets, and how her upper body was trembling in fear. Her ride was over before it even began and she got bucked off at 1.5 seconds.

Everyone turned their attention to the last bull in Round 2 to where Marisol sat atop Thundershanks. Earlier, I had heard Kyrie giving Marisol the same exact pep talk I had given her, and I saw that Marisol had put on a brave face. Catching our eye, she smiled and flashed us a thumbs up sign. The gates opened as the horn sounded to begin her round, and as the bull made the first two jumps, to my horror, I saw that the latch hadn’t been properly secured from the previous ride, and Stomperosa had just gotten loose.

As if in slow motion, I saw all the rodeo clowns converge on Stomperosa in a desperate effort to herd him back into his pen before he collided with Thundershanks. Understandably, Marisol panicked when she saw the second bull in the arena headed her way, and her grip on the strap loosened. I knew in that moment that Marisol was at serious risk for injury since she was unprotected and vulnerable without anyone to assist her.