The thing was… I didn’t know if I would ever be ready.
I dragged my hands down my face and beard. Addie was already walking away. I took off down the driveway. I wasn’t ready to go back. Only when I had reached the highway did I realize how far I’d actually walked. From here, it was at least eight miles to Hawk Mountain. With a defeated sigh, I turned and headed down the road. Thank God I’d left the truck keys behind. They were still hanging in the ignition. Of course, Miley would be pissed at me for leaving, but I couldn’t fucking help it.
My phone began to buzz again in my back pocket, but I ignored it. For the past fifteen minutes, off and on, it had been ringing. I was a fucking coward and knew it, so I did what I did best… I ran.
“You’re not worthy of them,” I told myself and stuck out my thumb.
An older model pickup truck was heading my way. There was a man behind the wheel. He was alone, and as he slowly drove past, he eyeballed me. He was lucky he hadn’t run his truck into the ditch. It came as a surprise when he slowed down up ahead and pulled over onto the shoulder of the road. I couldn’t believe my luck. I jogged toward the truck.
Didn’t that old man know better? You’re not supposed to pick up hitchhikers.
For an instant, I experienced a moment of regret at the thought of leaving Miley and Sierra behind without even a word, but it only proved that I’d been right all along… I wasn’t the man that they needed.
The man they needed, he wouldn’t run.
The truck’s windows were rolled down. Icy blue eyes regarded me curiously. I walked closer noting the gray hair sticking out from underneath his blue baseball cap. I was a big man, but he didn’t seem the least bit unnerved by me or my size.
“You need a ride?” he asked, staring at me.
“You ain’t afraid of picking up a stranger?” Even though I desperately needed a lift, I was unable to stop myself from cautioning him. It was second nature to me.
His lips curved into a grin, deepening the lines of his wrinkled face. “I ain’t afraid of nothing, boy. Besides, I saw you coming from my son’s driveway. Hop on in,” he ordered, and I found myself walking around the front of the truck. I opened the door and climbed inside. Lying between us on the seat was a pistol. It was pointing straight toward me. His eyes held mine as he reached for the gun while wearing a shit-eating grin.
“Safety’s on,” he reassured me, and then he slid it up underneath the front seat. “Where you headed?”
“Can you give me a lift to Hawk Mountain?”
His gaze briefly flickered to me before he pulled out onto the road. “You any kin to Reva Lucas, boy?”
“Yes, sir. She was my granny.”
“She was a good woman.”
After that, I didn’t make any attempt at conversation. While I was staring out the window, I felt my phone buzz once again. I chose to ignore it and, instead, focused on the scenery as we crept slowly up the road at a snail’s pace.
It might actually be faster walking
.
“You gonna answer that?” the old man asked, but I ignored him. I didn’t know him, and he didn’t know me. This was just a ride. It wasn’t any of his business. Anyway, I didn’t feel much like talking, especially not after what I’d just done. “What were you doing coming out of my boy’s driveway?”
“I was visiting friends,” I said and gritted my teeth.
Couldn’t the old man take a hint? I didn’t want to talk.
“Did you drive there?” he asked.
Hell, he was too nosey for his own good. It was just my luck to bum a ride from Kara’s father-in-law of all people.
Images of Miley’s face flashed through my mind. Thoughts of her and Sierra had me questioning myself. It was a shitty thing I was doing, running away and leaving them behind. I’d done the exact same thing to my gran.
“Listen, do you care to turn around? I forgot something.”
The old man slowed down the truck and then pulled over onto the shoulder of the road, coming to a complete stop. He looked over at me, frowning. “I ain’t no damn taxi service,” he grumbled, his eyes narrowing. “What did you forget?” he asked, and my lips flattened into a thin line at yet another question.
Damn, he could try the frigging patience of a saint.
“Is that really any of your business?” I asked, eyeing him back.
“Well, the way I see it boy, if a man, who obviously had a ride to visit friends left out on foot, then he’s running from something or someone. What are you running from boy?” he asked, and the tone of his voice along with the way he called me boy had me clenching my teeth. I took a deep breath and prayed for patience.
“Myself,” I admitted, and his eyes slightly widened at hearing my confession, but the reply seemed to satisfy him. He nodded his head like it was an answer he could live with, and then he looked both ways and whipped around making a U turn.
Thank fuck, I’d finally managed to shut him up
.
We headed back up the highway in blessed silence. I’d never been so anxious in all of my life, and Miley had to be worried. It wasn’t long before the driveway came into sight. “You want me to take you on up to the house?”
“No, here’s good,” I assured him, and he pulled to a stop at the bottom of the drive. When I climbed out of the truck, I reached into my back pocket taking out my wallet.
“Don’t need your money,” he stated, eyeing me hard. “Did you figure out what you left behind?”
Ignoring him, I tossed a twenty onto the seat and closed the door walking away. The sounds of his cursing followed after me as I started back up the road I’d just left behind. “I don’t want your damn money!” I heard him yell after me. “What did you forget?”
“My heart,” I mumbled beneath my breath and kept right on walking.
My thoughts drifted with each step I took as I considered what I’d almost done. The phone in my back pocket buzzed again and this time, I answered it. “Hello.”
“Where are you?” Miley asked. She sounded worried.
“I walked a little farther than I realized,” I lied, instead of telling her the truth. It would only hurt her. “I’m on my way back now.”
“I see you,” she said, and when I looked up, she was heading straight toward me. Our eyes met, and she started running. The sight of her alone stole my breath. My steps quickened. My heart was pounding. Then the next thing I knew, I was running, running straight to her. No matter what happened, I couldn’t abandon Miley. I couldn’t abandon Sierra. I would not desert them.
Her scent engulfed me when my arms wrapped around her. She felt so good. “I was worried,” she confessed, her face buried in my chest. Her words were muffled, but I heard her loud and clear. I pulled back and slid my hands into her hair. Bright blue eyes met mine.
Fuck me, I was so screwed.
This woman held my heart in her hands. That thought alone should have terrified me, but here, in this moment with her… there was a sense of freedom unlike any I’d ever known.
She felt like home to me.
“I’m right here.” And I lowered my lips to hers.
WE WERE SITTING
on the back deck, laughing. Miley wasn’t shy, so we sat in one chair with her draped across my lap. We’d ended up spending the rest of the day at Kara and Devon’s. I had to admit, I was envious as hell of Devon’s new toy. Sure, she was a little rough around the edges, but Devon, the automotive visionary that he was, had explained his plans to transform the classic Chevy he’d christened as Bertha into one bad ass machine.
Even though it was a Chevy, I’d cut him some slack.
The picture he’d painted with his words alone left me with no doubt that when he and Jake had finished with Bertha, she would be hardcore. Jake had started in monopolizing the conversation by detailing a new design he’d like to build for the custom bumpers and rims.
Between the two of them yakking, I’d barely managed to get a word in edgewise. We’d ended up walking back down the driveway, allowing me the chance to show off my baby.
Hey, I needed bragging rights, too
. I’d seen the look in their eyes when they’d gazed at my Ford. Jealous as hell they were, but she was mine and they weren’t getting their grubby little hands on her regardless of the suggestions for modifications. She was perfect just the way she was.
The deck where we sat overlooked rolling pastures that ended at a fence line butting up against the forest’s edge. It was peaceful and secluded. The front open and wide; the back, a hidden sanctuary surrounded by nature. Below us, Sierra and Jagger were playing on a swing set. I couldn’t see them, but every now and then, I could hear them arguing. It didn’t sound like anything serious, plus Miley was right here sitting on my lap. She didn’t seem worried. Anyway, Sierra could more than hold her own with Jagger.
The sound of Miley’s laughter shook me from my thoughts. Her face was lit up by whatever Devon had just said. It not only had her amused, but also everyone else. I’d only caught the tail end, but whatever he’d said had Kara blushing. She’d turned in his lap and swatted his arm. My lips twitched and curved upward.
Just like a woman
.
Acting like they were all mad over a little bit of teasing when they actually ate that shit up.
Devon brushed a quick kiss on her lips, and all seemed forgiven for the moment. His hand lay possessively across the gentle swell of her stomach. My own tightened at witnessing the protective gesture.
Baby Althea sat swaying gently back and forth in a portable swing beside Jake and Addie. There was no shortage of chairs even though we’d all ended up with our women on our laps. I wasn’t complaining, though. Miley’s curvy ass felt pretty good resting against me. I reached down, shifted her closer, and grabbed the beer sitting on the deck near the leg of my chair. Miley glanced over at me with those luscious lips of hers curving into a grin. I winked at her and she winked back.
“Nate, you need to stop by the shop, man,” Jake said, and I nodded at him in agreement while swallowing the swill of beer.
“I plan on it.”
In fact, I actually looked forward to it.
“Mommy!”
The loud scream had Miley jerking in my lap. It was Sierra. My hands instinctively gripped her hips, steadying her before she fell and busted her ass on the deck. “What in the world?” she wondered aloud.
Both she and Addie were already on their feet, but Devon had to help Kara up from her seat. Sierra was crying, but before anyone could investigate further, she and Jagger appeared at the top of the steps.
“What happened?” Kara asked. Jagger looked guilty as hell. Sierra was sobbing.
Miley knelt down on one knee, holding her arms open wide. Sierra launched herself into them and began crying even harder. She cried so hard, she started to hiccup. “Little man,” Devon warned, his voice stern. He cocked a finger and motioned Jagger forward. He walked slowly across the deck with his head downcast.
“What did you do?” Devon asked.
Suddenly, Sierra pulled away from Miley and ran to me. Without saying a word, she climbed up into my lap. Miley’s eyes met mine over her head. “Are you okay?” I asked, whispering those words near her ear. Sierra didn’t answer, but, instead, she nodded her head and snuggled in closer against my chest.
“Jagger Devon McGraw, explain,” Devon ordered, staring down at his son.
“Dad,” Jagger began, but then he fell quiet and glanced guiltily over at Sierra. His expression was one of concern.
“Now,” Devon prompted, and Kara stepped around Devon to stand beside Jagger. She placed a reassuring hand on his tiny shoulder shooting Devon a dirty look. There was no mistaking the silent message that passed between the two of them. She was clearly telling him to back down.
Sierra sniffled against my chest. “He threw a frog at me,” she whispered, barely loud enough for me to hear.
Did she just say what I thought she just said?
I couldn’t help myself, my chest began to shake with laughter.
Hell, it was all I could do not to chuckle out loud.
“Tell me what you did, son,” Devon asked, and though I wanted to come to the little guy’s defense, I remained quiet. It was time for him to fess up because in this life, you had to deal with your own shit. Jagger’s face suddenly scrunched up and he appeared as if he might cry too at any given moment, but surprisingly, he straightened his shoulders and looked his dad square in the eyes.
“I threw a frog on Sierra,” he confessed. Devon’s lips twitched. It was easy to tell he was trying hard not to laugh.
“That wasn’t a nice thing to do, Jagger. You know that Sierra is afraid of frogs,” Kara scolded. Jagger shuffled back and forth beneath her stern gaze, looking remorseful and guilty all at the same time.
“I know.” He shoved his hands into his front pockets.
I glanced at Miley, and she held her hand over her mouth trying hard to hide a smile.
“Well, she’s not scared of worms,” he stated, as if his logic made perfect sense. “Why is she scared of frogs?” he asked, appearing confused.
“You need to apologize, now,” Devon insisted, and Jagger hesitated a brief second before walking over to where Sierra and I sat.
She was eyeing him warily; almost as if she expected him to pull another frog out of thin air and throw it at her. “It’s okay, baby,” Miley said, reassuring her. She patted Sierra’s knee then smiled encouragingly at Jagger.
“I’m sorry, Sierra,” Jagger said, his expression remorseful. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
Sierra nodded her head against my chest then began to squirm in my lap so I let her go. She slid to her feet to stand before Jagger. She stared at him with watery eyes while wearing a timid smile. “It’s okay,” she said, and all was forgiven. Just like that; the two hugged one another.
“Aww, that is so cute,” Addie gushed. I saw her and Jake exchange a secretive smile and then glance at baby Althea. Someday soon, she’d have her share of frog throwing little boys chasing after her.
“Sorry about that. He’s a handful,” Devon apologized.
“Sierra’s fine,” Miley insisted, and reached out ruffling Jagger’s hair. “We should probably get going. The sun’s staring to set, and those two have had a big day together. They’re probably tired.”