Trapped with the Blizzard (8 page)

After taking Dani to the ticket office to get her a season pass, I checked the conditions. Even with the surprise dump, the base was alarmingly shallow. We were running at almost full service with two trails still yet to open, so a couple feet of free snow was a godsend but not enough. Judging by the new forecast, we’d be choking on the stuff before long.

It was early morning on a Tuesday, which meant the lift lines were as short as you’d ever find them on Powder Mountain.

I clicked into my skis and adjusted the goggles on my helmet. We stood in front of the big trail map at the center of base camp. “So, where do you want to go?” I asked her. “We could get a few runs in on Devil’s Gulch or head straight up to the top. Your mom didn’t mention how long it’d been since you…”

“Let’s just go to the top,” she replied, skating off on her board before I could respond.

I gritted my teeth as I watched her glide away toward the wrong lift. A part of me wanted to correct Miss High and Mighty, point out she’d actually made a mistake, but the adult in me kicked in.
You need to rise above, Liz,
I thought with all the calming energy I could muster.

I pushed myself along and swiftly caught up with her as she approached the lift. She tried to grab a chair on her own, but I deftly slipped in beside her. I reached out as the chair swung around and plunked my ass down, ensuring a wonderfully private and awkward ride up the mountain together.

“Well, here we go,” I said with fake cheerfulness.

She looked at me as if I’d appeared out of nowhere before snapping her gaze straight ahead. As we rose above the ground, I lowered the safety bar across our laps, settling the bottom of my skis on the narrow footpad.

“So! When
was
the last time you were out on the slopes?” I asked.

She replied with a half shrug, her eyes anywhere but on me. I’m not sure what I’d done to earn such ire, but I’ll be damned if it didn’t make me try harder.

“Sorry, I didn’t hear you. My helmet kind of muffles things,” I said, leaning forward.

“I don’t know,” she finally muttered. It was the eloquent response I’d been waiting for.

I nodded to myself and decided to fill the silence with enough inane chatter she’d have no choice but to listen. She didn’t have to take part, but maybe if I kept it up, a conversation would magically materialize.

“I haven’t actually been skiing since the accident,” I said. It just came out, but even as I said it, I was shocked by the truth. “It didn’t intentionally work out that way, but everything happened in New Zealand, and it was the middle of summer when we got back here. Bryan and I got married pretty quickly, and by then, I was already pregnant.”

“Your mom must be so proud,” I heard Dani mutter under her breath.

My patience can only run so thin. Since she was so fond of shocking people, I thought I might try to shock her myself. “My mom is dead, actually.”

When Dani looked at me, I didn’t see an ounce of surprise. I saw a glint of dark humor in her hazel eyes. “Funny that. We have so much in common. My dad is dead.”

“Your dad isn’t dead,” I replied slowly.

“Might as well be,” she said as she looked away.

Again, choosing to ignore the anger dripping from her tone, I thought I might embrace the shift in conversation.

“Actually, you and I have a lot more in common than you think,” I smirked.

“God, I hope not.”

“Oh, I’m not all that bad.”

I tried to lighten the situation by rocking the lift. Maybe if I startled her, it might bring out a little more personality. I swung my legs back and forth, the chair bouncing along on the thick cable above us until I got a good rhythm going. I expected she might squeal or maybe even get pissed off, but I was greeted with neither of those reactions.

Instead, a deep sadness filled her eyes. “Please stop,” she asked quietly.

I stilled my legs, feeling like I’d done something horribly wrong without understanding. As we ascended the mountain the last five minutes, I kept my mouth shut. Maybe it was a little too much, too soon having a day by ourselves. By the time the top of the lift came into view and I moved the safety bar in its upright position, I reassured myself that she was just a hurt girl lashing out at the world. Of all people, I knew what that was like.

“Sometimes it can be a little tricky getting off with a skier, so I’ll push off first and you can follow after.”

The steep drop of the lift came quickly. I instinctively rose from the seat and glided down, ski poles in one hand. I turned in time to see Dani place half her foot on the stomp pad between the bindings on her snowboard. The heel of her boot grabbed the snow as she tried to slide down. She wobbled, throwing her arms out for balance as she ungracefully stuttered down the slope to my side. I knew any comment would just make her more upset.

“Since I know you don’t care, I figured we could go down this route,” I said, pushing away before she responded. I checked over my shoulder twice to ensure she was clicking into her bindings, going slow enough she’d be able to catch up.

I’d loved skiing since the moment I tried it, in no small part because my mother had, too. As silly as it might sound, I felt connected to her on the mountain, like she was with me somehow. I tried snowboarding once or twice, but there was something about the awkward sideways movements I could never get the hang of. As much as I would rather have soft snowboarder boots, the ability to just slide off the lift and ski was enough to make me never want to switch.

I took long, sweeping turns down the intermediate slope. With no one around, I didn’t have to worry about impeding any other skiers. One last look over my shoulder, I was glad to see Dani slowly gaining momentum over the top of the ridge. I thought she might try to ditch me.

I gained momentum as I took tighter turns, feeling the edges of my skis cut through the powder. Ever since the first snowfall, I’d been having dreams about getting back on the mountain. The attacks from a year and a half prior actually hadn’t been detrimental to my love of skiing at all. No matter what happened in our lives, the snow and the slopes would always be my therapy.

Trees encroached from both sides, narrowing the trail into a thin chute. With skis being inherently faster than snowboards, I didn’t tuck and dive into the run as much as I could have, not wanting to leave Dani behind. Apparently, I didn’t need to concern myself with that.

Just as I was coming out of a sharp turn to the right, a blur in a purple jacket flew past, spraying snow all over my skis. I gave a shout to Dani, telling her to slow down, but she was too far ahead.

“Oh, that’s it,” I muttered. This girl can try to challenge me all she wants, but out here, I’m the boss. I tucked into a tight crouch, keeping my knees together, and pinned my eyes on Dani’s back.

I caught up with her as she navigated a sweeping turn to the left. The snow on this part of the course had become a bit icy and she was forced to slow down. My skis, however, ate ice for dinner. I threw myself into the turn, the edges grabbing the ice and flinging me around the corner. My leg muscles screamed with sweet exertion.

Almost as a last thought, I passed her from behind and gave her a slight whack on the ass with the end of my pole. I heard her squeal, and I chuckled to myself. After putting a little of distance between us, I slowed to give her a chance to catch up. No amount of aggression could beat physics. I thought maybe the competitiveness might give us something to bond over finally.

Unfortunately, I underestimated her mean streak. I tried to keep an eye on her with quick glances over my shoulder, but I still had to concentrate on the trail ahead. Our trail had been empty at the start, but the further down the mountain we went, the more trails joined in. We were no longer the only ones on the slope. As my attention behind waned, Dani flew up from behind and zagged in front of me. The edge of her board cut straight across the top of my skis. Without looking, I knew she’d left horrible gouges. Not only was it incredibly dangerous, she just ruined a couple hundred dollars’ worth of gear.

“Hey, you little bitch!” I shouted.

Dani smiled over her shoulder, the first true joy I’d seen from her since we’d met. She tucked into a tight ball, pointed her snowboard straight down the slope, and flew down the mountain. I could’ve caught up to her, but instead, I let her go. I was in such a rage I didn’t trust myself.

By the time I joined her at the bottom of the mountain, she was just stepping out of her bindings. When she looked up to see me approach, I saw a second bright smile.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I spat, wanting to wipe the grin from her face.

“Oh, I’m so sorry. It’s just that I haven’t been out on the mountain in so long, I’m not really in control of what I’m doing,” she said in a sickeningly sweet voice.

I inspected the damage for the first time, a deep gouge running right across the molded tips. While the slashes were merely cosmetic, it pissed me off something horrible. I swallowed hard, looked at the blue sky as if I could find an answer there, and let out a shaky breath.

“That’s okay. I know you find it difficult to control yourself,” I said with as much double meaning as I could muster. “But I think you need to slow down because you might hurt somebody.”

She chuckled and gave me a mock salute. “Oh absolutely, Officer Blizzard ma’am.”

I was the closest to slapping a teenager I think I’ve ever been in my life. She met my gaze, challenging and full of anger. I bit my lip hard enough I thought I might draw blood, but I held onto my last shred of patience.

“I think it might be best if we go our separate ways for a little while,” I said in a monotone voice.

“Gee, you sure you trust me on my own?”

Frankly, I couldn’t care less if you topple off a cliff, darling.
She knew she’d gotten under my skin, but I wasn’t going to give her the pleasure of showing it. “As long as you can prove you can be trusted, I’m willing to give you the chance. I need to pick Jack up by three, so if you can meet me by the big Adirondack chair out front around 2:30, that would be good.” I reached into my pocket and pulled out a $20 bill. “I have a lot of things to do tonight, so it’s really important we leave here by half past three,” I scolded as I handed her the money.

“Yeah, yeah.” She took the money and shoved it into her pocket.

Again, not trusting myself to remain the civil adult I was supposed to be, I gave her a quick nod and skied towards the gondola. I clicked out of my skis, smiled to the liftie as I handed him my gear, and found a spot at the end of the bench.

It took the entire journey up the mountain to regain control over my anger. That girl had the innate ability to press all of my buttons. No, she didn’t just press my buttons. She smashed her fists against the proverbial keyboard. I’m not sure if it was because I could see so much of myself in her, or that I knew deep down she could be a great, empathetic girl. Seeing her with Jacky proved there was a good person inside. But she straddled a tenuous line. If she tipped in either direction, it could determine the rest of her life.

At the top of the mountain, I took a deep, calming breath. The cold air stung my lungs and I savored the rare moment of solitude. Not that I would trade my life for anything in the world, but it’d been a long time since I was just Liz. Not Liz the Wife, not Liz the Mother, not Liz the Public Personality. Just Liz with the snow, the mountain, and speed.

I felt a pang of guilt when I thought about Jack down at the base. I reassured myself he was probably having the time of his life. I adjusted the goggles on my face, secured the strap under my chin, stomped the snow off of my now damaged skis, and pushed towards a black diamond run I hadn’t been on in almost two years.

It wasn’t pretty and it wasn’t my best form, but I attacked that trail like it owed me money.

I watched Liz powerfully push herself over to the gondola and step out of her skis. I still couldn’t make sense of her. Was she trying to be my mother? Was she trying to be my best friend? There was something about her that just grated my nerves the wrong way. Even though I tried to keep my temper, she had a knack for pressing all of my buttons. I’d agreed to the day out because of my conversation with Bryan, but I couldn’t get through an hour with the woman before snapping at her.

I shook my head clear and took a fresh look around the mountain. It was smaller than I remembered from the last time I’d been there. I guess it’s like that with a lot of things as you get older. As I loosened the bindings and picked up my snowboard, I tried to remember the last time we had come to Powder Mountain. It was close to my thirteenth birthday and I wasn’t exactly excited about going on a family vacation with my parents. I remember them not wanting me to go off by myself. Mom was afraid I’d get kidnapped, while I think Dad just wanted to spend time together, make it a true family outing. Even then, all I wanted was to be treated like an adult, like my opinion had merit.