Authors: Toni Aleo
Later that night Fallon lay against Lucas’ chest, listening to his rapid breathing. They only made it to the living room before they were at it again. It was glorious and Fallon was sure that Lucas could do no wrong with that mouth of his. Yeah, he was a yeller and cocky as hell but when that mouth was on her, she didn’t even think of the wrong it did. He was the perfect lover. He was giving and compassionate while still giving it to her hard and rough, the way she loved it. She lay with a satisfied smile on her face as she ran her fingers up and down the abs of his stomach.
“Well that was fantastic,” Lucas said, causing Fallon to giggle.
“Basically,” she said quietly as his arm came around her, pressing her closer into him. “You worked me to the point of starvation.”
Lucas chuckled as he kissed her temple. “Did I now?”
“Yes and I’m pretty sure I won’t be walking right tomorrow.”
“Good,” he laughed with a smack against her naked butt. She let out a little cry before moving away from him and picking up his black dress shirt. She felt his eyes on her as she buttoned each button and when she glanced down at him, seeing the lust swirling in his eyes, she knew she had to get away or she would never be able to eat.
Fallon walked slowly to the kitchen with Lucas watching every move she made. She looked through the fridge and saw that he had chicken in a bowl marinating. She smiled as she brought it out; smelling it to make sure it was good. She proceeded to take out a pan and veggies to make a dish for herself and Lucas. At one point she glanced over to see Lucas still watching her every move, and when their eyes met, he smiled lovingly at her. She returned it but felt bad for it. It was all going to be so hard tomorrow when she left but she had to stop thinking about it. Enjoy the time she did have with him.
She was stirring the chicken when Lucas said, “He died from a heart attack.”
Fallon glanced up to see Lucas standing beside the counter in only a pair of white boxer briefs. Of course, he looked like a damn underwear model. Fallon had to actually force herself to look up at him and not his package. Lord, he was hot.
He took a deep breath in before looking back up at her. Fallon turned down the stove and lifted herself up on the counter as he leaned against the one across from her. He crossed his arms against his chest before looking down at the ground. She wanted to know what happened, but did she deserve to know when she planned on leaving? Did she deserve the right to know everything when she knew there was no future — outside of Aiden — for them?
Before she could stop him, he said, “I remembered looking out the window because I heard him go outside. I knew he was getting the mail because he had ordered something for me for my birthday.” A small smiled formed on his lips. “It was this amazing stick that I didn’t even realize was delivered until a week after his death, but anyways, I watched him reach into the mailbox, and then he stopped. The most awful look came across his face and I stood up. When he fell I was already out the door, running down the driveway to him.”
Fallon covered her mouth with hand as she took in quick small breaths. Lucas had nothing but raw emotion all over his face, and Fallon could see the tears gathering in his eyes.
“I was screaming ‘Dad? Dad, wake up!’, when my mom came running down the driveway. He had died instantly and I guess Mom could tell because she tried to pull me away, but I wasn’t going. I tried crawling to him, but my mom had a death grip on me. The only reason I stopped fighting her was because I noticed my bloody fingers. I had popped two of my nails off and the rest were all so jagged that during the funeral I kept running my other fingers along them, feeling the jagged edges and the scabs from the cuts.”
Tears ran down Fallon’s cheeks as she watched Lucas run his thumb along his fingers the way he described. She had seen him do it time after time before but now that she knew why he did it, it destroyed her inside.
“I shut down and didn’t tell anyone that I felt like I was dying. My dad was my best friend, my coach, the one person that understood me. Losing him was almost as bad as losing you.”
“It had to be worse, Lucas,” she gasped out, running her hand along her cheeks to brush away the tears.
“No,” he said quickly, “When I lost you it was because of my own stupidity.”
“Lucas stop, you’re killing me here,” Fallon said, looking away. Lucas came over to her, going between her legs and leaning his head against hers. “I’m sorry about your dad; I wish I would have been able to meet him.”
Lucas nodded against her forehead. “Me too, he would’ve loved you and Aiden so much.”
Fallon’s heart broke as she wrapped him up in her arms. “I’m so sorry.”
“I know you haven’t said you’d give me another chance yet, but I hope that you know how sorry I am and how I’ll never hurt you again.”
Fallon sighed before saying, “I know Lucas, and believe me, as much as I want to trust you, it’s just so hard.”
Lucas nodded as he met his lips against hers. “We’ll just have to work on your trust issues.”
“We?” she asked, because wasn’t that
her
problem?
“Yeah, when you agree to give me another chance, it won’t be just me anymore, it will be we. Always and forever.”
Lucas looked up at her and Fallon’s heart broke. He wanted her so bad, and she wanted him, but how? How could something work when everything was against them? Fallon cupped his face with her hands, and he brought his own hands up over hers. He turned his face, biting into the palm of her hand. He glanced up at her as he ran his tongue up her palm to her ring finger, where he bit softy. Fallon took in a sharp breath, getting wetter by the second by just the sight of his mouth on her. He bit down her palm to her wrist, where he left a nice little mark before smiling over at her.
“I want to eat you up,” he whispered against her wrist.
It was hard for Fallon to form words when he looked at her like that, with such hunger in his eyes as he slowly bit down her arm and along her shoulder. She loved it when he bit her; it turned her on beyond belief. Fallon pushed aside her thoughts of their issues and focused solely on her need for him. Tomorrow would be the day to worry, tonight was the night to enjoy the love that was between them.
Lucas woke to the sound of Fallon moving around the room. She was dressed in a pair of jeans and her old Stanford tee as she continued to stuff things in her bag. As he rubbed his eyes, he thought about complaining at her for not being snuggled up against him, but then it clicked that she was packing.
Quickly.
Lucas’ pulse picked up in speed as what she was doing became apparent. She was trying to leave without saying goodbye.
“You were never going to give me another chance, were you?” he asked after watching her for a moment. Fallon looked up startled before looking back down at the things she was packing. He moved out of the bed, pulling on a pair of boxers before looking back over at her.
“I told you I didn’t know!” Lucas yelled, startling her. She looked back at him and he knew she heard the desperation in his voice. “I didn’t want to sleep with her, Fallon.”
“I saw her last night, and she told me, but even so, I’ve spent the past seven years hating what you did to me. Blaming myself, and to find out that you were sick and then to find out you never even slept with her,” she slowly shook her head as she continued, “I feel like everything was set in motion to keep us apart. That we weren’t meant to be together.”
Fallon rolled her eyes. “Please, you came on to me, and I couldn’t resist. It’s undeniable that I want you, Lucas, I do, but I can’t do this.”
“This is bullshit,” Lucas said, collapsing into a chair. “I just don’t understand. Are you trying to hurt me? Is that what you are doing?”
Fallon shook her head. “No, I’m trying to protect you. I can’t fully give myself to you because I don’t trust you. I am fine when it is just me and you in this house, but this isn’t reality. We both have lives, and I will constantly be worried you’re fucking someone else while you’re gone. I can’t do this Lucas. I can’t.”
“You won’t even give me a chance though!”
“Because I’ve already been burned by you. Yes, the situation was fucked up then but you burnt the bridge of us. I’m too scared.”
A long moment passed as they stared into each other eyes. Fallon’s eyes filled fast with tears as Lucas looked at her, feeling nothing but defeat. He knew he was losing her. Fallon turned, picking up her bag to leave. When she looked back at him, he looked down at the ground, taking in another deep breath, willing himself not to cry.
Lucas was a mess.
Not only had he already been in the sin bin four times, he had thought of Fallon nonstop as he continually took his frustration out on all the Sharks players. If he wasn’t throwing them against the boards, he was smashing their faces in with his fist.
Bishop only got out the first part of the offending word before Lucas’ fist connected with his mouth. Bishop dropped to the ground and before Lucas could go after him, Jakob and Phillip were pulling him back as the referees skated around blowing those stupid ass whistles.
“Both of you, box!” one of the referees said. Lucas shrugged his shoulders and skated towards the box again before taking a seat next to the box attendant.
“Not your game tonight, huh Brooks?”
Lucas shook his head. “Not looking that way.”
“Looks like Bacter is pissed,” the attendant said. Lucas looked across the ice where Coach Bacter was throwing his clip board and waving his arms above his head.
“I think you are right,” Lucas said with a shrug before letting out a long breath. As he leaned against the back of the penalty box, people slammed their fists against it, trying to provoke him. Since he knew he couldn’t fight a fan, he took in another long breath and closed his eyes.
The image of Fallon walking out of his house and getting into the taxi appeared and Lucas had to open his eyes again. He couldn’t handle the image, but it didn’t stop it from still being there. Her tear-streaked face haunted him, and he hated that she was doing this to him. Was it his payback? Was this how she figured she could hurt him? He told her everything, he basically gave her his heart again, and she threw it in his face. All because she didn’t trust him, which was bullshit! She hadn’t even tried! She hadn’t even given him the fucking chance he deserved!
He didn’t even cheat!
Lucas threw his stick down and his gloves soon joined it before he ran his hands through his hair. He was so fucking mad, so hurt that he wanted to leave and go home. He wanted to march up to her front door, pound on it until she came to it, and then promptly shake the shit out of her until she realized she had made a mistake! Didn’t she realize that he loved her? Had he told her? No and damn it, he wasn’t going to either! She would probably just throw that in his face too. She drove him fucking insane.