Unbroken (Unarmed Trilogy #2) (33 page)

“You’re just as active out here as you were in my womb!” Tamzin smiled as she placed a kiss on Liam’s forehead. “You are going to be just as strong as your Papa. Why, I think you already have his hair and lips!” She looked away from Liam’s face and to Will, where she smiled. She was weak and so pale, but she was alive. Will felt his resolve crumble as he collapsed on the bed next to her and cupped her face with his hand. She leaned into his touch and Will heard Liam gurgle in her arms. He peered over her shoulders and finally saw his son truly for the first time.

He was tiny, impossibly small, and was wrapped in a white sheet-like blanket. His eyes were open and were a strange navy color with pink cheeks and red lips. He squirmed against Tamzin’s arms and kicked the blanket off his legs, revealing chubby legs and his nappy.

Will could not believe that he was staring at his child, that this little being was the one that kicked in Tamzin’s belly. Liam stared at Will for a moment, like he was an intruder, before he extended his arm to him. Will laughed and offered Liam his finger, which the boy took. Will was shocked by Liam’s strong grip and sat up from the floor and joined his family on the bed.

“Isn’t he so beautiful?” Tamzin asked as she stared down at her son and pressed another kiss to his brow.

“He’s a boy. He’s handsome,” Will smiled as his other hand grabbed Liam’s small foot.

“I will call him what I want. When he is grown and has his own children, I will remember how beautiful I thought he was when he was born,” Tamzin giggled as Liam struggled against her. “He’s a true Northman. I think he hates the heat as much as you do!”

“He may have a Southern mother, but he is nothing but a son of the North,” Will said as he continued to stare at his newborn son. “I have never seen such a small baby before.”

“Have you never seen a newborn before?” Tamzin asked.

“No. I never saw myself having a wife or a child. That’s not the kind of man I thought I would be,” Will said as he ran his thumb over Liam’s foot. “I didn’t think I would have someone in my life that it would kill me to lose. And I didn’t think I could add to that brood,” Will laughed through the tears in his eyes and watched Tamzin offer Liam to him.

“Do you want to hold him?” She asked with a smile.

“No, no, I can’t. I don’t want to hurt him. I’m not gentle. I have never held a baby before,” Will babbled as he put his hands up in a defensive measure, like he were terrified of a seven-pound newborn.

“There is no better time to learn to try than with your own child. Liam knows who I am, but he needs to get to know his Papa,” Tamzin continued to smile as she extended her arms to him with Liam. “Just keep his head supported with your arm. You will know what to do.” Tamzin didn’t wait any longer and passed Liam into Will’s arms.

Liam cried for a moment from the shift and Will felt the weight of him. His head rested in the crook of Will’s elbow and he stared down at Liam. He wasn’t sure how he could describe the feeling of seeing his son for the first time, but it was unbelievable. Will traced Liam’s feature with his index finger, amazed at how much smaller he was in comparison. Liam cooed for a moment before he grabbed Will’s finger and began to suck on the tip.

“He must be hungry,” Tamzin said as she opened her arms for her son again. As Will shuffled Liam in his arms, Tamzin pulled down the sleeve of her shift to reveal her swollen breast. Will watched as Tamzin took Liam into her arms, like she was an expert already, and pressed Liam’s face into her chest. Will watched as Liam began to suckle from her and Tamzin sighed. “He wants to eat so much.”

“Does it hurt? Should we try to find a wet nurse to help?” Will asked as he continued to stare at his son. It was all so surreal for him.

“No, I do not wish for a wet nurse. I am his mother and I will be the one to take care of him. I don’t want him to know anyone else as his mother,” Tamzin said as she scratched Liam’s scalp. “He likes it, like you do.”

“I’m very partial to your breasts as well,” Will joked and smiled when he heard Tamzin’s laugh. “Are we not going to speak about what has happened?”

“It’s over. What is there to talk about?” Tamzin asked as she settled against the pillows and switched Liam to her other breast. “I could hear you, after I passed out.”

“I thought you were dead. I have never seen you so pale before and I couldn’t hear you breathing,” Will said, his voice pained and his eyes tired. “You are truly a sight for poor eyes.”

“If I told you something, would you believe me and not believe I’m crazy?” Tamzin asked as she adjusted Liam in her arms.

“Of course,” Will said as he crawled into the bed completely and laid in the pillows next to Tamzin.

“I think I saw my mother,” Tamzin said as she began to burp Liam before she laid him down on her chest. Will reached over and stroked his son’s back as the boy faced his direction. He was sleepy and let out a big yawn. “I know it sounds mad, but I was walking on the beach and she was there. I know it was her.”

“Did you talk to her?” Will asked.

“Yes,” Tamzin replied before she stared down at her son. “She said it wasn’t my time and that you and Liam both needed me. She said I turned out better than she could have ever dreamed of and that we make beautiful babies,” Tamzin said as she tried to hide her tears. “It could have been a hallucination, but I kind of wish it was real. My father always said I looked like her, but this was the first time I saw her. Or think I saw her.”

“I think you did and I don’t think you are crazy. Before I knew Nicola was alive, I used to dream about seeing her. I know what you’re feeling,” Will said as he turned on his side and pressed his body against her.

“I know it’s hard and I wouldn’t be say this normally, but I really, truly want you to try and mend your relationship with Nicola and bond with Willem and your siblings. Liam needs them. I want them in his life, especially with Gregory as he is,” Tamzin said as she touched Liam’s head. He was sound asleep on her chest.

“I will try. I promise,” Will said as he snuggled into her side. “Let me put him in the bassinet. You need your sleep.”

The white bassinet had been put in their room the week before. Nicola told Tamzin she had tried to save the one Will had slept in, but Gregory had destroyed it and sent it to Nicola in pieces. Aidan had commissioned the bassinet as soon as Tamzin and Will had arrived as a welcome gift, as his gifts had been turned away at the wedding. Neither Tamzin nor Will had any idea.

Tamzin smiled to herself as Will gently lifted Liam from her chest and cradled him against his own chest. Will kept his arms locked around Liam’s tiny body; he had never held anything so precious before in his life. Softly and quietly, Will placed Liam in his bassinet and adjusted the blankets around his son. He laughed as he watched Liam flailed his legs about to kick the blankets off of him and extended his arms over his head. From where he stood, Will looked out the window, over the walls of the territory and the sky was dark. The sun would rise in the coming hours and Will sure it would be the dawn of war.

But he couldn’t worry about that now. With his son comfortable in his crib and Tamzin safe in their bed, Will stripped out of his clothes and climbed in next to her. Though she was sore, Tamzin pressed herself against him and rested her head against his chest. Will stared up at the ceiling under sleep overtook him.

Liam woke them up multiple times that night, but Will found that he did not mind. A part of him wondered if his sleepless nights were just in preparation for this? When Liam didn’t have to be fed, Will took it upon himself to care for his son. It was the middle of the night when Will called on Nicola for help.

He had never changed a nappy before.

“We have servants for this. You both truly need your sleep,” Nicola said as she removed Liam’s soiled nappy and tossed it in the bin next to the table.

“Tamzin doesn’t want that. I’m obeying her wishes,” Will said as he watched Nicola clean Liam with a wet cloth. The baby gurgled as Nicola pinned the nappy together on him and she took Liam into her arms.

“It’s like looking at you again as a newborn. You screamed just as loud, your hair was just as dark and thick; everything is the same. One difference is that your father didn’t bother to join me in the birthing bed. But you didn’t bat a lash,” Nicola said as she put Liam against her chest and patted his back.

“My wife was in pain. I wanted to do what I could to help her,” Will answered as he stared at Liam. He was beginning to fall asleep as Nicola continued to rub his back.

“He doesn’t seem like a fussy baby, but if he has trouble sleeping or becomes colicky, have Tamzin rub him down with some lavender. It will soothe him,” Nicola said as she walked over to the bassinet and placed Liam back inside. “The first day is the hardest.”

“Thank you for your help. I don’t want Tamzin to have to do everything, but I have never handled a baby before,” Will said as he gently touched Liam’s bare feet. “There aren’t a lot of things I have no experience in.”

“You have to start somewhere,” Nicola said as she drifted away from the bassinet and pointed to the clean sheets. “In the morning, the sheets need to be changed again…”

“I want you in his life. In Liam’s life, as his grandmother. I want the same for Willem and Ethan and Katya. Liam needs an extended family, and I know Tamzin wants us to be a family for him,” Will interrupted before he ran his hand through his hair. “I never knew anyone loved me until Tamzin. For every second for the rest of his life, I want Liam to know that he is loved. He will know that his father loves him above all else.” Will’s teeth mashed down on his lip as he fixed Liam’s blankets.

“Your father has never been remotely humane to you, but if he treated you any differently, you would not be the person you are now. When Liam grows up and when you have more children, you will see that every experience has molded you to become a great father and husband, as well as an exemplary king. You need to look back at your past and remember the good misery has brought you,” Nicola said as she gently touched her son’s arm. Her voice cracked slightly. “I know our relationship may never be mended truly, but know that I never stopped loving you from the second I knew I was carrying you.”

“I know that,” Will said as he looked up from Liam’s sleeping body and looked his mother in the eye. It was the first time he could see the small resemblance between them. “You should get some sleep.”

“I imagine I’m going to have to show you how to change a nappy again,” Nicola said before she laughed softly. “Get some sleep, Will.”

Nicola left their chambers and Will returned to the bed. He wrapped his arm around Tamzin’s torso, still swollen like she was still carrying Liam. Her back was warm against his chest and he buried his face in her neck. He dreamed of her in the wildflowers again.

~~~

It was dawn and the fog was still thick in the air when Will awoke to the booming sound of the war drums. He sat up abruptly and then Liam’s squeals and cries awoke Tamzin from her deep slumber. Will bolted from the bed and to the window, where he could see the few people still outside the gate are being ushered inside. He saw no sign of his father and his army, but someone had, and now the warning drums were ringing just as loud.

“What’s happening?” Tamzin asked as she stood on shaky legs and walked to the bassinet, where she took the crying Liam into her arms. “It’s okay, sweetness. Mama will protect you.”

“My father has been spotted in the area. I need to get you in the safe zone,” Will said as he ran to the armoire in their chambers and tore the doors open. He immediately began to put on his armor and slipped his sword into its sheath. His movements were marred by clangs now, which only irritated Liam more. His cries grew in volume.

“What will you do?” Tamzin asked as she cradled Liam to her chest and tried to hide her nervousness.

“Let him know that he cannot hurt my family or the people under my protection,” Will said as he made the final adjustments to his armor. He saw the uneasy look on Tamzin’s face and he approached her swiftly and cupped her face. “As long as there is breath in my body, no one will harm you or our son. As the mother of my child and heir, the Bradfords will protect you, as will my aunt, and obviously your father. Fear nothing and no one, my love.”

“What if you don’t come back?” Tamzin’s brown eyes filled with tears before Will pressed his lips against hers.

“I will come back and we will be a family. I will finish this; I promise,” Will said before he kissed her again and grabbed her robe, which he wrapped around her shoulders. Tamzin had just been slipping on her sandals, when Garrett walked into their chambers.

“Your father’s army is making their way through the passageway in the mountain. He obviously remembered it when he came for Nicola twenty years ago. His men are having issues making their way through passageway very slowly. It appears that they are unmanaged,” Garrett said with a grin. “And my plan has worked. It only looked like he has brought one thousand men or less.”

“Perhaps you should continue writing my father. I want you to stay with the Roth archers. I need to make sure Rolf follows my exact orders,” Will said as he began to rub Tamzin’s arms to comfort her. “Come along. I have to take Tamzin to the bowels of the palace.”

With Will’s arm around her shoulders, he led Tamzin out of their chambers and down the various stairs and twists and turns. The hallways were empty, save the soldiers, and Will led her underground, to a separate wing for the royalty and high class nobles. Will immediately found his sister and mother, along with his grandmother and her ladies. Will sat Tamzin down in a chair, where he sat on his knees in front of her.

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Liam’s forehead and inhaled his son’s clean scent. Tamzin had told him once that all little babies had a nice smell to them and he wanted to remember it. Liam squalled in Tamzin’s arms as Will took Tamzin into his arms and hugged his family tightly to his chest.

“You have to come back. I want a husband, not a hero,” Tamzin whispered in his ear as her fingers swept through his curls and scratched his scalp. Will nodded before he kissed her again and their entwined hands squeeze together.