Authors: Daniel Arenson
She nodded and wagged her tail. "Yes sir!" She patted the demon hugging her left leg. "This is Annie." She patted the demon hugging her right leg. "And this is Mandy."
The girls grinned at Neev. "Hello, nice mister human!"
Neev cleared his throat and waved hesitantly. "Uhm, Romy, they're... little children."
Annie blew him a raspberry. "I'm not little, I'm eight."
Mandy stuck out her tongue. "And I'm eight-and-a-half, I'm
big
."
Romy hugged them close. "Don't listen to him, he's just a cranky warlock. Come on! Let's play marbles like we used to."
"Okay!" the demon girls chimed together. Soon the three demons sat on the floor, squealing and laughing as marbles rolled. Mandy opened a box of chocolates, and soon Romy's face was covered and her belly full.
"Have some chocolates, Neev!" Romy said. He was still standing in the corner, eyes wide. "Join us."
Hesitantly, he sat down on the rug. Mandy and Annie leaped onto him and kissed his cheeks.
"Eat some chocolates, Uncle Neev!" Mandy said.
Annie held out the box to him. "They're yummy."
He did not eat but looked at Romy. He opened and closed his mouth several times before he could speak.
"Romy," he finally said, "we came to Hell to find help defeating Madrila. You said your friends are fierce warriors."
"They are!" Romy said. "Show him, girls."
The two little demons shoved Neev down and began pummelling him with their fists. They roared and kept punching him. Neev lay on his back, sighing.
Romy leaned down and whispered, "You have to pretend to be hurt, that's how it works."
His face grew red. He leaped to his feet, knocking the girls back. His hair was wild.
"Romy, for heaven's sake!" he shouted. "I'm done pretending! Our town needs us. Our friends need us. My siblings need us. Doesn't that mean anything to you?" He glared at her. "Was all this just an excuse to visit your friends, these little girls?"
Annie and Mandy stared at him, mouths open. Tears filled their eyes, their bottom lips wobbled, and they began bawling. Their tears flew in fountains.
"Look what you did," Romy said. She put her hands on his shoulders. "Neev, I..." She felt tears fill her own eyes. She hated her weakness. She didn't want to cry! She wanted to slap Neev, to yell at him, to be strong and right and angry. But her tears did fall, and she turned her head aside in shame. "Oh, Neev," she whispered. Her body trembled. "I'm so sorry."
"I just—" Neev pulled his hair. "I don't know, Romy. I don't know anymore. What should I do with you?"
She hugged him and leaned her head against his shoulder. Her tears wet his cloak. "I'm sorry, Neev. I'm sorry I'm sorry so very much." She trembled against him. "I want to save Burrfield, really! But... I guess I also wanted you to see my home. You know?" She sniffed, looked into his eyes, and touched his cheek. "I love you so much. With all my heart, so much that it hurts sometimes. So much that... when you're away from me, I'm so sad, because I miss you so much. And when I'm with you, I'm always happy. No matter what. Even in the great dangers, and through the toughest times, I'm happy when I'm with you. Because I love you that much. And... well, you showed me Burrfield. You showed me your family and friends. And I wanted you to... to see my home, and meet my friends, and...."
She could say no more. Sobs racked her body and she could only cling to him, drenching him with her tears.
He sighed and patted her hair. For a moment they stood holding each other.
"I love you too, Romy," he finally said, voice soft. "Now and always. But what will we do now? How will we find help here to save Burrfield, to save our house, our home?"
She held him tight. "I don't know, Neev. I thought Annie and Mandy could help us, but... they couldn't even beat
you
up. Not even
you
, Neev! How would they fight grunters or Madrila?"
He bristled and cleared his throat. Before he could reply, Mandy squeaked up.
"If you need help fighting somebody, we can bring the hellhogs."
Annie nodded. "Mhm. We have lots of them. After you left, Romy, the girl hellhogs all had babies. And they've grown. Quickly."
"We trained them!" Mandy added. "They'll do whatever we say."
Romy's eyes widened. She gasped. "Hellhoggies!" She jumped up and down. "Squee squee! Me wants to see the hoggies!" She grabbed Neev's hand and pulled him. "Come on, Neev, let's go see them!"
Mandy and Annie led the way, skipping and wagging their tails. Romy and Neev followed. They passed through a doorway, down a tunnel, and into a great chamber the size of a mountain. The girls led them over a craggy stone bridge. Lava bubbled below, and rocs screeched above. Other demons lived here, glaring from alcoves that filled the chamber walls. Neev pulled his hood close down over his head, but if anyone noticed a human walking through Hell, they only muttered.
The girls sang as they skipped ahead. "We're off to see the hoggies! The wonderful hoggies of Hell!"
One old demon, who stood on an outreach of stone above, waved a cane at them. "Be quiet, damn kids! And I thought I told you to stop bringing sinners down here."
They ignored him and kept walking. Across the bridge, they walked down a twisting tunnel, and soon entered a great shadowy chamber. The air smelled of fur and fire. Hundreds of eyes filled the shadows. Hundreds of tails wagged and hundreds of mouths slobbered.
"Hoggies!" Romy said. "Look, Neev!"
The hellhogs filled the chamber. Some were older, the size of rhinos on Earth; they had black fur, red horns, and long tusks. Most were the youngsters, half the size but still larger than Romy, their fur red and their tusks still short.
"These things will fight for us?" Neev asked, raising an eyebrow.
Romy nodded. "Look at those teeth! Look at those horns!"
"And we've trained them well," said Annie and Mandy, tails wagging. "They're also available for dancing routines, if you're interested."
"We're most definitely interested," Romy said. "But first we have to save our town." She tugged Neev's sleeve. "Can we take the hellhogs to Burrfield, Neev? Please please please? They'll be really good fighters, I
promise
."
"Pleeeeease," said Annie and Mandy. "Please please please let us take the hoggies!"
"I don't know...," Neev said.
"Pleeeeease," Romy begged and tugged his sleeve violently. Mandy and Annie hugged his legs. "Please, Mommy Neev, pleaseeeee."
The hundreds of hellhogs looked up, snorted, and stamped their feet.
"Peeeeeeees," they snorted, smoke rising from their nostrils. "Peeeeeeeeeeeeees."
Neev looked at Romy, looked at the demon girls hugging his legs, and looked at the snorting hellhogs. Finally he heaved a long, deep sigh that left his shoulders stooped and his eyes weary.
"Oh, all right."
"HOORAY!" the three demons cried. They leaped onto him and knocked him down. The hellhogs swarmed around him, licking him with slobbery tongues.
"Get off!" Neev said. "Off, the lot of you!" He struggled to his feet. Hellhog drool and fur covered him. He shook himself, spraying the drool. "Disgusting."
Romy grabbed his shoulders. "Let's go back to Earth! Come, through this door."
She walked across the room to an old, wooden door. She opened it to reveal a landscape of grass, sunrise, and a stream. She breathed in the fresh air.
"Ah, good fresh Earth air!"
Neev stared with wide, unblinking eyes. His mouth opened and closed like a fish. It was a long moment before he could speak again.
"We could... this is... there's a door between Earth and hell here?"
"Well, duh," Romy said. "It's only a mile away from Burrfield, actually. There, you can even see Burrfield behind that tree."
Neev gasped. He blinked a few more times, then shouted. "So why didn't we just come in this way! Why did we fight hellsnakes, and molemen, and lava whales, and devil ducks, and walk for hours through a hundred chambers? Why couldn't we have come through this door!"
Romy snorted. "Oh please, Neev. This entrance is
boring
. I figured we'd take the scenic route."
She walked outside into the sunlit valley. The hellhogs followed, fur bristling and nostrils sniffing. Mandy and Annie skipped alongside, singing tunes. Romy turned to see Neev still standing in Hell, gaping.
"Well come on, slow poke!" she cried back to him. "For somebody who's in such a hurry, you sure do move slowly."
He stepped outside in a daze, mouth still opening and closing like a fish's. Soot covered him. When they were all outside, Romy closed the door behind her; it was covered in grass, and blended in with the hillside.
She kissed Neev's cheeks and mussed his hair. The hellhogs crowded around them.
"And now," she said, "we can go fight Madrila."
Chapter Twenty-One
The Hoarders
She hung from the trees, wrapped in cobwebs. The spiders clicked around her, crawling over their webs toward her. They surrounded her as far as she could see.
"Back!" Willow screamed between strands of cobwebs. "Stand back!"
The spiders kept crawling toward her. Their mouths opened, drooling. Their legs clacked and their eyes blazed. Willow struggled, screaming. Cobwebs bound her arms to her sides. Her legs were wrapped together.
"Food... foooooood," the spiders said. They crawled nearer and placed their legs upon her. Their mouths opened wide.
"Back!" Willow cried. "I am a powerful witch! I will hurt you if you don't move back."
Grunting, she twisted her hand and reached for her belt. Her fingers grazed the top of her wand. A spider bit her shoulder, and she screamed. Squirming and bending her fingers, she managed to grasp and draw her wand. Arm still pinned, she pointed the wand and uttered a spell.
"Now die, spider!" she said. "Die with fire!"
Magic crackled across her wand... but instead of deadly fire, a cupcake flew from it.
A spider opened its mouth and swallowed the treat.
Damn it!
Willow struggled in her bonds. She had meant to roast the spider, not feed it! But at least she had sated its hunger, and it wasn't eating her at the moment.
A second spider approached below her, clacking up toward her legs. Willow twisted her wand.
"Eat lightning!" she said and uttered a lightning spell.
A stream of candies shot from her wand, hitting the spider's face. The spider's mouth clacked opened and closed, catching candies and chewing.
When more spiders approached at her left, she cast an enchanted arrow spell, which made cookies shoot from her wand. Next she shot honeyed almonds, lollipops, and gingerbread men. Soon the spiders were all munching and ignoring her.
"Now release me from these cobwebs," she said once they had eaten the treats.
The spiders growled and raised their legs over her. They opened their maws, revealing sticky teeth.
"Do it!" she said. "Release me and I'll give you more treats."
The spiders howled. Their legs rose and fell, shaking the cobwebs. Their mouths opened and closed, and their eyes blazed.
"I mean it," Willow said. "No more treats unless you release me. Cut these cobwebs loose!"
The spiders roared. The fur on their abdomens bristled. They looked at one another, looked at Willow's wand, and slammed their legs down onto her. Willow screamed, expecting them to rip into her flesh, but their legs were tearing off the cobwebs. They spun her around, tearing webs, releasing her limbs, and Willow fell from the spiderweb.
She crashed through branches, yelped, and landed in a pile of dry leaves. Moaning, she struggled to her feet and wobbled. Her head spun. Everything hurt. Cobwebs and spider drool covered her.
She looked up and saw spiders racing down the tree trunks. Her first instinct was to run, but they were fast. They would catch her. Their mouths clanked open and shut, and they cried out.
"Foood.... foooooooood."
"Stay back!" she shouted.
The spiders froze.
Willow raised her wand.
The spiders jerked, mouths opening wide.
Willow cast a spell, and fireworks of gumdrops exploded above her. The spiders raced around the trees, gobbling them up.
"Now freeze!" Willow called. The spiders froze, watching her eagerly. Crumbs covered their faces and filled their fur.
"Come down here," Willow said. "Stand on the ground before me." She pointed. "Here! Stand here."
The spiders scurried down the trees, dozens of them, each one the size of a pony. They crowded together on the forest floor, watching her and drooling.
"Sit!" she said.
They sat, and she tossed them cookies and cupcakes.
"Follow me," she said. She took three steps, and the spiders followed, never removing their eyes from her wand.
"Stop!" she said and they froze.
Slowly, hesitantly, a smile spread across Willow's face.
These creatures are powerful. They are evil. And they are mine.
"Follow me," she said. "We're going back to Burrfield."
They followed, squealing and cackling and begging for treats.
When Madrila sees the army I bring her, she'll have to take me back.
She'll have to make me a real witch.
Willow laughed as she walked through the forest, a hundred spiders following her.
* * * * *
Jamie gasped, sword held before her.
Hills of trash filled the tower. She could not see the floor. Rag dolls, plates, rotting fruit, old clothes, torn books, necklaces, stale bread, boots, hammers, cutlery, and countless other items—they piled up inside Dry Bones's old tower, threatening to collapse and bury her.
The strangest creatures Jamie had ever seen stood atop the piles of garbage. The elflings gasped around her and raised their weapons.
"What are they?" Ellywyn asked in disgust. She clutched her silver dagger.
The creatures looked at them and hissed.