Authors: Daniel Arenson
"They're... they're made of trash," Jamie said.
The creatures cackled. Their limbs, torsos, and faces were cobbled together from countless objects: doll parts, broken jugs, old clothes, washboards, purses, torn scrolls, rotten food, and many more things. One creature shuffled toward them. Its fingers reached out, made of cutlery. Its eyes were two glowing beads, a mop formed its hair, and its lips were a sliced orange peel.
"We are not made of trash." The creature spoke in a raspy crone voice. "We are made of beautiful, lovely things."
A second creature shuffled toward them. It wore mismatched boots over wooden legs; one a table leg, the other a broomstick. Its eyes were two silver coins set in long head made from a bellows.
"We are
hoarders
," this second creature said, expelling its creaky, windy voice through the bellows's nozzle. "We collect only the nicest things."
Three other hoarders stood behind these two, cobbled together from countless items. They nodded and muttered agreements. Jamie saw that vials of potions were embedded into their bodies of trash, glistening like glass boils.
"They have the potions," she said to the elflings. "That's what we need."
Grumbledook peeked into the tower and sniffed. "I'm not drinking anything taken off those things." He snorted.
Jamie glared at him. "You will drink what I tell you!" She marched up toward a hoarder. Its body was built of the potions, nuts, bolts, boot soles, crusted shoelaces, coins, a bracelet of seashells, and sundry other items.
Jamie looked at the potions covering its body. She saw potions labelled "Healing", "Strength", "Death", "Love"... and buried deep between crumbled handkerchiefs and apple cores, a vial of purple potion labelled "Growth". Jamie reached toward it.
"You will not take my things!" the hoarder screeched. It slapped Jamie's hand away. "Not my beautiful, beautiful things."
Jamie shook her hand; it hurt. She glared at the hoarder. "Your things aren't beautiful, they're junk! Can I just have that one vial?"
The hoarder reached toward her with hands made of forks. It began to rummage through her pockets.
"Hmm, things, yes, more beautiful things!"
"Hey, let go!" Jamie cried. She tried to back away, but a second hoarder approached behind her and reached into her pack. A third joined them. They rummaged through her belongings, muttering and whistling.
"Ooh, lint, I like that, yes. Nice pretty copper coins! And she's got a lovely candle, oh yes, that'll look nice here, wouldn't it, lovelies?"
More hoarders were similarly mobbing the elflings, rummaging through their packs and pockets.
"Nice elfling things, yes! Acorns and silver thread, and ropes and kindling and buttons and needles, yes lovelies."
Jamie squirmed and kept beating their hands away. "Let go! Those are mine."
The hoarders glared at her, their eyes made of buttons, seashells, beads, and coins.
"Our things! Ours now. Lovely, beautiful things, yes lovelies."
Once the hoarders had emptied the companions' pockets, they began adding their treasures to their bodies. They stuck the candles, coins, and acorns onto their torsos. They strung the threads, buttons, and rope through their hair. One placed Noelyn's necklace of riverstones around its own neck.
"Oh, yes, we are so pretty, aren't we lovelies?" The hoarders cooed to one another. "We are so beautiful."
Jamie sighed. "Yes, you're lovely. Now that you've stolen our things, can we have the potion?"
They hissed at her. "Be gone! You want to take our things! You want our beautiful treasures."
Jamie groaned. "Just the potion! And you can have the vial back afterwards. We only want the liquid inside."
The hoarders began shoving her. "Back, back! That's what they all say, yes they do, lovelies, yes they do. They only want to take one thing, they say. But then they want more. Then they want to take all our things. We needs them, lovelies. We needs our beautiful treasures, yes."
"It's not beautiful, it's crap!" Jamie shouted. "You own nothing but garbage."
They snarled, baring teeth made of wooden chips, broken knives, and shards of glass.
"They are treasures. Now leave, thief. Leave our room of treasures!"
Jamie had heard enough. "I'm taking that potion."
She held her shield up, plowed her way forward, and reached toward the hoarder with potions on its body. Her fingers grazed the growth potion vial, and she was just about to clutch and tug it, when the other hoarders leaped onto her.
"Jamie!" the elflings cried in fright.
The hoarders slammed her onto the piles of trash. She sank into the dirty clothes, broken toys, beer mugs, and other items. The trash heap rose to her chest. The hoarders above began biting and scratching, and Jamie cried and tried to shove them off with her shield, but they kept attacking.
"Let go of her!" Ellywyn cried. Jamie glimpsed a flash of red hair and silver. A hoarder squealed. Jamie floundered and tried to swing her sword, but only cut garbage. She glimpsed a second flash of movement—a moon goldencharm glowing, and purple eyes, and she heard Noelyn's voice.
"Get off Jamie!" Noelyn too slammed into a hoarder, shoving it off.
Lightning crackled, and Jamie heard Rowyn uttering spells. A hoarder above her shook, purple lightning racing across it. Jamie screamed and shoved it with her shield. It fell off her, and she crawled atop the trash heap, sword swinging.
Her sword slammed into a hoarder, scattering bracelets, cups, bottles, and bolts.
"My treasures!" it screeched. "My things, my lovelies!"
It knelt and began collecting the items. Jamie swung her sword again, breaking off more trifles. Rings, a baby's shoe, a bladeless hilt, forks, a brooch, and coins flew. The hoarder wailed.
"Jamie, the potion!" Ellywyn cried to her right. She was thrusting her dagger, holding back the hoarders with the growth potion. It lashed its cutlery fingers and snapped teeth of shattered glass. Ellywyn kept trying to grab the vial, but couldn't reach it.
"I see it!" Jamie cried. She ran toward the hoarder through the piles of garbage. The trash rose to her knees; she could barely move through it. Rowyn fought at her side, tossing spells against two hoarders. Noelyn was swinging a candlestick at another hoarder, shouting at it. Blood ran down her thigh.
"We will have your bones!" cried a hoarder and leaped onto Jamie. "We will have your beautiful, lovely bones for our treasures."
Jamie gulped. She noticed that behind the trash comprising the hoarder—rags and doll heads and socks—it seemed to have human bones held together with strings.
Did it take those bones from humans it killed?
Jamie wondered.
The hoarder's hands were made of garden shears. They sliced at her. Jamie raised her shield and blocked the blades. She swung her sword, and it slammed into the hoarder's neck. Bones snapped. Jamie swung her sword again, and the head rolled. Buttons, chess pieces, seashells, and beads spilled from it.
"My things!" it cried. "My things!"
Jamie leaped toward the hoarder attacking Ellywyn, the one with the growth potion on its body. She slammed her sword down and severed its arm. Eggshells and toy soldiers spilled from the wound. When the hoarder knelt to collect them, Jamie grabbed a vial that was attached to its stomach. She yanked it free.
She looked at the vial, but it was the healing potion.
Damn it!
She growled and tossed it aside. The hoarder leaped onto her, one arm missing, teeth snapping.
"You want to steal our lovely treasures!"
She swung her blade into its head. It screeched and fell. Jamie leaped onto it and began tearing the vials off, seeking the right one. Around her, the elflings still fought the other hoarders.
"Got it!" Jamie said. She lifted the purple vial over her head. "Growth potion. Now let's get out of here!"
The wounded hoarders were busy rebuilding themselves. They were rummaging through the trash, picking broken toys, jugs, beads, and sundry other items. They began attaching them to their bodies, building new arms, legs, heads, and patching up wounds.
"Lovely things!" they cried. "Beautiful treasures."
Jamie grunted and ran toward the doorway. The elflings ran at her sides. They burst out of the tower panting and bloodied. The hoarders screeched inside.
"They are stealing our treasures!"
Jamie turned her head and saw them at the doorway. They peered outside with narrowed eyes, but dared not follow. They blinked and hissed in the sunlight.
"Ah, sunlight that burns!" one said.
They began retreating indoors, covering their eyes and whimpering.
"The outside world is bad."
"The outside world wants our treasures, lovelies."
Soon they disappeared back into the piles of trash and closed the door behind them.
Jamie took deep, shaky breaths. Her head spun. She had never seen such creatures.
God, one had bones under the trash of its body.
Jamie had thought it collected the bones from dead humans, but now she wasn't sure. Maybe it
was
human, or had been long ago. She shuddered.
"You are a great warrior," Ellywyn said, staring at Jamie with somber eyes. A scratch ran down her cheek, seeping blood. She placed a hand on Jamie's shoulder. "You are my sister in arms."
Noelyn and Rowyn stood holding each other. The archer rested her head against the wizard's shoulder. He was smoothing her silver hair and whispering into her ear.
Grumbledook stared at them all, puffing smoke through his nostrils. "Well, it's about time you found my potion." He coughed. "All that fighting and shouting hurt my ears. Bring it here."
Jamie stomped toward the small, shrivelled up dragon. She grabbed his snout and stared into his eyes. "Now listen here, you old bastard. If I give you this potion, no more excuses. You grow big, and you start fighting for us. Next battle, I want to see you lashing your claws and blowing fire. Understood?"
He snorted smoke onto her. "I am a dragon of my word. You have a deal."
The elflings gathered around. Jamie sheathed her sword and uncorked the vial. Green smoke rose from it, and a scent like raisins and wine tickled her nose. Grumbledook opened his maw and stretched out his white tongue.
Jamie tilted the vial over the dragon's mouth. Purple liquid spilled. Grumbledook gulped and made a face.
"Disgusting!" he said. "It tastes like grapes. Couldn't you find any elf-flavored potion?"
Jamie narrowed her eyes and stared. Grumbledook stared back. The elflings crowded closer.
"Nothing's happening!" Rowyn whispered.
"Just wait," Jamie said. "Watch."
Grumbledook's eyes widened. The clouds parted, and sparkling rays of light fell upon him. Harps played and angels sang. Jamie caught her breath. Grumbledook was growing!
"A miracle!" Noelyn whispered and a tear ran down her cheek.
Grumbledook grew... and grew... and grew... until he was about ten percent larger.
The light dimmed.
The angelic choir fell silent.
Grumbledook coughed.
Noelyn shouted for joy and hugged him. "Hooray!" she said. "You've grown very slightly larger!"
Jamie rubbed her eyes and gasped. "Is that
it
?" She stamped her feet. "Bloody hell. I was expecting more." She squinted at Grumbledook. "You were the size of a pony. Now you're the size of a very small horse."
Grumbledook unfurled his wings and roared to the sky. "Behold! I am a mighty dragon! Cower around me!"
"I'm still taller than you," Jamie said. "And I'm four-foot-ten."
He seemed not to hear her. He blew wisps of fire at the sky. "Cower, world, at the might of Grumbledoo—"
He began to snore.
Jamie sighed. She sat down and buried her face in her hands. The elflings patted her sympathetically.
"What now?" Rowyn said.
Jamie peeked between her fingers at the sleeping, slightly larger dragon.
"Maybe if he flies very high above the battle, he'll appear larger," she said and clearly heard the misery in her voice.
"Maybe," Noelyn agreed, stroking Jamie's hair. "He's not much bigger, but... he's all we've got. He might be a little small and shrivelled, but he's still a dragon. That's got to be worth something, right?"
Jamie stood up and heaved a sigh. "Let's go meet the other Bullies. Maybe they fared better." She kicked Grumbledook. "Wake up! We're going to fight."
They walked into the sunset, Grumbledook's rings of smoke floating above them.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Montage
Scruff kissed his wife's cheek.
"We will save our home," he whispered to her, stroking her hair. "I promise you."
Cobweb cuddled against him. "We wiww, Scwuff. I know."
They sat on a mossy log, trees rustling around them. Fifty spiderlings stood around them, sharpening spears and fletching arrows. The giant dragonflies stood tethered to trees, drinking nectar from piles of flowers the spiderlings had picked.
"It's only a small army," Scruff said quietly. "Fifty spiderlings against hundreds of monsters. But the other Bullies should be here soon. They'll bring more help."
Cobweb kissed his cheek and held his hand. Her hand was so small in his, not even half the size, soft purple against his rough, calloused skin.
She's so pure, so perfect. She deserves better than to live like this, a hunted outcast.
He looked around the forest, waiting for the other Bullies to appear. Where were they? They had agreed to re-gather here a moon after leaving on their quests. The full moon had been two nights ago, and they still lingered. Worry coiled in Scruff's belly. What if they had died?
"Maybe I should go look for them," he said to Cobweb. "I'll climb the mountain where Jamie went. I'll find the volcano to Hell and find Neev. I—"
Voices came from between the trees, interrupting him.
"Mommy, can you carry me? Please!"
"No, Romy, I told you a million times. You can walk."