White Oblivion
Authors: Amirah Bellamy
White Oblivion
A Novel
by Amirah Bellamy
White Oblivion. Copyright © 2015 by Amirah Bellamy. All Rights Reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. For information contact
[email protected]
.
White Oblivion
is dedicated to the the fallen young heros of our time that were brutally, savagely taken from this physical realm and graciously welcomed into the ancestral and spiritual realm. May you enjoy your ascent to the highest heights and your evolution into your true god essence in immortal bliss….
Ashe…. Freddie Gray, Walter Scott, Anthony Hill, Akai Gurley, Tami Rice, Victor White III, Dante Parker, Ezell Ford, Michael Brown, Tyree Woodson, John Crawford III, Eric Garner, Yvette Smith, Donitre Hamilton, Jordan Baker, Barrington Williams, Carlos Alcis, Deion Fludd, Jonathan Ferrell, Kimani Gray, Kyam Livingstone, Larry Eugene Jackson, Jr., Miriam Carey, Tyrone West, Chavis Carter, Dante Price, Duane Brown, Ervin Jefferson, Jersey Green, Johnnie Kamahi Warren, Justin Slipp, Kendrec McDade, Malissa Williams, Nehemiah Dillard, Ramarley Graham, Raymond Allen, Rekia Boyd, Reynaldo Cuevas, Robert Dumas Jr., Shantel Davis, Sharmel Edwards, Sgt. Mauel Loggins Jr., Shereese Franci, Tamon Robinson, Timothy Russell, Wendell Allen, Alonzo Ashley, Jimmell Cannon, Kenneth Chamberlain, Kenneth Harding, Raheim Brown, Reginald Doucet, Aaron Campbell, Alyana Jones, Danroy Henry, Derrick Jones, Steven Eugene Washington, Kiwane Carrington, Oscar Grant, Shem Walker, Victor Steen, Tarika Wilson, DeAunta Terrel Farrow, Sean Bell, Henry Glover, James Brisette, Ronald Madison,Timothy Stansbury, Alberta Spruill, Orlando Barlow, Ousmane Zongo, Michael Ellerbe, Timothy Thomas, Early Murray, Malcolm Ferguson, Patrick Dorismond, Prince Jones, Ronald Beasley, Amadou Diallo, Nicholas Heyward Jr., Malice Green, Edmund Perry, Eleanor Bumpurs, Michael Stewart, Ron Settles, Eula Love, Mark Clark, Fred Hampton & James Powell
Acknowledgments
I thank my beautiful spirit guides who are always around me urging me on lovingly throughout my creative journey and inspiring me to realize more of who I truly am. I also thank my beautiful inspirational, creative soul group for keeping me humble.
1
I inhaled deeply taking in my first morning breath still gleaming from the night’s glow. Enjoying the feeling of having been awakened by the beautiful song of the birds just outside my window I snuggled my head deeper into the nook of Doran chest. After all of this time I still loved the feeling of mornings like this. I squeezed my eyes shutting them tighter and inhaled deeply again just to take in the goodness of the feeling again with all of my senses. It was bliss.
I knew that Doran was my soul the day we saw one another and briefly exchanged words at Everlasting Life Cafe three years ago. Everlasting Life Cafe was a popular vegan restaurant in DC on Georgia Ave., N.W. that I went to maybe two to three times a year to treat myself. It was a bit pricy so I didn’t go there often, but the food was absolutely delicious!
That day when I saw Doran he was looking breathtakingly gorgeous and so I struggled to maintain my composure trying not to gawk too much. He stood in line in front of me wearing a white t-shirt, blue sweatpants and black sneakers. I thought to myself, this man is a god!
Though externally everything about him was mediocre, he had an irresistible, strong magnetic energy that pulsated miles outward so much so that it swept me up off of my feet and hurled me into his outer space. I swear it was in his eyes.
Doran was a chocolate brown complexioned dream! He was average build and height and stood about 6’3. He wore his hair in a short close cut with a goatee. Though he seemed quite average to the passerby to me his aura was absolutely magical and I was instantly captivated by him. Yet it was the gaze of his eyes that I
felt
before I saw that drew me in for the kill. His eyes whispered to my soul requesting that I invite them in. Unable to resist their magnetic pull I obliged and looked back at them. Then once our eyes met it was an etheric explosion!
I could see that he felt it too because as he placed his order, ordering a couscous side, marinated mushrooms and a rising sun shake, he kept looking over at me as he spoke, seemingly a little distracted. Then once he completed his order and as if reading my mind he looked back at me and said “Peace goddess.” In awe of the god before me I nodded and replied, “Peace god.”
That was all that we said to one another, but it was a greeting that I never forgot. Then, surprisingly after placing his order and getting his food Doran left and I never saw him again until about 6 months later. We were both at Everlasting Life again. When I saw him again I thought to myself that it was just too good to be true.
That day I was there with my homegirl Cre. We were on our way home from a day of light shopping and both wanted to grab a bite to eat before heading in. We’d already stopped by Sweet Green where Cre had already picked up a salad, but I wasn’t in the mood for salad so we also went to Everlasting Life, though it was a bit out of the way. I just had the most intense craving for their Garvey Burger so I sacrificed the extra gas and headed over to Everlasting Life to satisfy my craving.
“Girl I can’t believe you drove all the way over here just to get that burger. Is that all you’re ordering?” Cre asked.
“Yeah. It’s the only thing I’m craving,” I answered.
“Yeah, but damn girl if you drive all this way you may as well order something for later too. Aren’t you at least gonna get a side?” Cre insisted.
“I guess you have a point. I’ll go ahead and order some of their mac n cheese for later then. If I don’t I’ll beat myself later,” I agreed.
Just as I walked up to order I felt it. It was that familiar stare. I didn’t even have to look because I knew who it was.
“How may I help you today sis?” the waiter asked walking toward the counter where I was standing.
“Yes, I’d like to order ----” I began as my words trailed off.
The instant I felt it I became distracted by it and could barely even remember where I was, why I was there and most importantly what I wanted to order. Everything just went blank! I thought to myself, “Oh my God!!! What the hell!” I quickly scrambled trying to remember what I wanted to order. I was so embarrassed!
“Oh my God I’m so sorry, but I forgot just that quick what I wanted to order. I must have gotten a brain freeze,” I said jokingly trying to make light of my embarrassment.
“It’s okay I understand. Happens to the best of us,” the waiter said smiling.
“Oh yeah, I wanted to order a Garvey Burger and a small mac n cheese to go please,” I said remembering again.
Cre looked over at me and snickered. She saw all of what was happening and I knew that I would hear about it once we left out of the restaurant.
Just then Doran came up to me and said, “Hello again goddess! It’s a pleasant surprise seeing you again!”
In shock I quickly regained my composure after experiencing near paralysis of the mouth and replied, “Peace god. It’s good to see you again also. How are you?”
“Well after seeing you I am well. How are you?” Doran responded.
“I’m well also,” I answered.
I was so nervous that I had no idea what to say next. I didn’t want things to end where they did last time and run the risk of never seeing him again so I wanted to come up with something to say to keep the conversation going, but I was frozen. Nervousness had taken me by the throat and I was paralyzed by it. This god was my soul and I had to stay connected to him this time. However, I didn’t want to come off too desperate so I maintained my silence. I was so nervous that I stopped breathing. Noticing that I was holding my breath as I waited for my order I slowly inhaled than exhaled deeply trying to relax myself.
Seeing the calmness return to me Doran gazed into my eyes and spoke again, “So beautiful what are you getting into later?”
His gaze was so intense that it nearly made me hyperventilate. By then my nerves were shot! I had to get it together. This was my chance and I did
not
want to let him get away again.
“Just probably gonna hang out for a while at a friend’s. Why do you ask?” I answered holding it together as best I could.
“Hoping that you’d like to share the time with me,” Doran responded with a sexy smile that nearly made me lose my balance.
“Hmmm that could be a possibility,” I replied smiling back at him.
“Well I’m a firm believer in making possibilities become realities so what do you say to us meeting back here at 7 o’clock this evening,” he suggested.
His confidence, his sexiness and his peaceful demeanor had the butterflies in my stomach doing the cupid shuffle. There was just something so intriguing about him that grabbed me by the heart and made me melt at the mere sight of him.
By then I was so nervous that I could barely find the words to respond. I’d never experienced anything like that before. Usually I was so controlled, confident and sure of myself. I was a master at communication, but at that moment words had completely escaped me.
He stood gazing into my eyes with that hypnotic gaze of his patiently awaiting my response. My mind was racing. In fact, I felt as if I was outside of my mind and body looking on as an observer. Then the room went silent and everyone else disappeared.
Without any further hesitation I answered smiling back at him, “Yes, let’s.”
“Ok then I’ll see you at 7 and enjoy your Garvey burger,” he said grinning as he stepped up to the counter to place his order.
I was frozen in awe of the god before me, but I had to will myself to walk out of that restaurant. It helped to see Cre looking at me from the doorway grinning from ear to ear.
Once I made my way to her she said to me, “Wow! So that was
niiiice
... very nice.”
“Whew! Girl let’s go I need some air!” I said waving my hand to gesture for Cre to follow me out the door.
“So girl who was THAT?” Cre pryed.
“I don’t even know, but I have a dinner date with him later,” I said still in shock.
“What!?! Girl you didn’t even get his name and you’re having dinner with him later?” Cre asked.
“I know crazy right!” I said smiling at my own insanity.
I couldn’t believe how badly I let my nerves get the better of me. Cre just looked at me and laughed as we headed out of the restaurant.