Accidental Crush (19 page)

"Hey, Ash." Just the sound of his voice
makes me melt and I love when he says "Ash"; it sure beats "kiddo."

"Hey," I
say, acting as if this is a normal occurrence when, in reality, it feels like an entire gymnastics team is in my stomach.

"Same plan as yesterday," he
says nonchalantly as he runs his fingers through his hair.

"Well, is Rebecca going to do her part today?" I
can't hide my anger as I glance down the hall at her.

"I didn't say anything else to her. I don't want to make it a big deal and I don't want anyone else to know, especially since we're not sure what's really going on."

"Good point," I agree. Just then, Shane comes up to his locker and gives Todd this smile I don’t quite understand.

"Hey guys." Shane
says, obviously surprised to see us together.

"Hey, Shane!" we both
say. Unfortunately, Todd also sees this as his cue to leave.

"I’ll see you at practice later, Shane. Don't tell her what song we're singing. She keeps trying to get it out of me." Todd
smiles his beautifully crooked smile as he walks back down the hall to his group of friends.

"Wow, Todd came over to say hi?" Shane
asks, as if he is pleased with himself.

"Oh, please, that's so not what happened," I
try to lie, unsuccessfully.

"Really? Well, what did happen?" Shane
isn’t buying it, but Sid comes over with Simon so he drops it. He definitely gives me a look that says the questioning isn’t over, though.

***

All through lunch, Todd is really good at keeping Brian’s attention away from Gretchen. Ryan and Gretchen are together the entire time, but Ryan is paying more attention to what everyone else at the table is saying. Part of me wants to tell him what Brian is up to so he’ll pay more attention to Gretchen, but I think Todd is right, if Ryan finds out, it’ll be a bigger issue. My brother won’t just let it go; his face yesterday at practice when Brian was openly flirting with Gretchen is proof enough of that. I really hope Todd can stop Brian before Ryan ever has to know. 

Practice
this afternoon is a bit of a mess. Brian is all over the place; he isn’t listening to the coaches and even when Ryan is wide open, he doesn’t pass to him. When coach pulls him aside, it looks like a heated conversation; both of their arms are flailing and there is definite shouting.

For another twenty minutes, Brian
avoids passing the ball even remotely close to Ryan who finally storms up to him in the middle of the field. They both take their helmets off and get right up in each other’s faces. 

“What’s going on?” Ryan
shouts loud enough for us to hear in the bleachers with his face only inches from Brian's.

“What’s going on with you?” Brian
shouts back, stepping even closer to Ryan.

“Nothing, throw me the ball and I’ll make the play. I can’t do anything if you don’t pass it to me,” Ryan
shouts and pushes Brian in the chest.

One of the trainers
tries to separate them right as Todd is coming out on the field. When he sees what is happening, he goes into a full sprint to get to them. “Guys, break it up. What is going on?” He pushes Ryan back to separate the two of them before the trainer grabs Ryan by the waist and pulls him back further to get more space between them.

Todd
is holding Brian back, but he keeps struggling to break free and shouting at Ryan, “I’ll give you the ball when I want to give you the ball.”

“Calm down, Brian. BRIAN!” Todd
shouts inches from his face, trying to get his attention to take his focus off Ryan.

Things
are unraveling so fast. I realize I’ve been holding my breath this entire time. So much for trying to keep everything under control until after the big game. I look around and the entire field is frozen. Everyone is in shock.

Sid practically
trips, she is coming up the bleachers so fast. “What's going on?”

“I don’t know, but it isn’t good.” I
say with my eyes locked on the field. That’s the truth. I really don’t know and this definitely is not good. This isn’t about Gretchen; well, at least not directly.
Gretchen!
I completely forgot about her. I look over and she is frozen like the rest of the field. As soon as both boys are secure, she runs straight to Brian. Todd is still holding him back, but he is struggling to break free.

“Brian. You’ve got to stop. STOP!” She
grabs his face to get his attention. “The game is two days away,” she shouts.

Ryan
seems just as surprised as everyone that she chose to run out to Brian first. The trainer is still holding Ryan back, but he is able to break loose. He calmly picks up his helmet and starts walking off the field. Todd lets Brian go now that Gretchen is standing there and he runs over to Ryan. Sid and I just look at each other, speechless, and then look right back towards the action. We don’t want to miss a second.

Whatever Todd
says to Ryan, it gets him to go back out on the field and Gretchen is able to talk Brian down. Todd and Ryan finally walk back to where Brian is standing in the middle of the field. Even Gretchen is smart enough to give them space.

“Don’t mess this up. The game is in two days. Scouts are coming to see you play, not fight.” Todd
is probably the only person who can talk sense into them at this point. Luckily, they do listen and start playing. They also seem to be more in sync after the blow up. Brian is at least throwing the ball to Ryan, and Ryan is making big plays, as usual.

Once the drama
is over, Sid and I both look at each other in shock.

“WHAT. WAS. THAT.” Sid's eyes
are twice their normal size.

“I’m not sure, but something is definitely going on.”
Honestly, I really don’t know what that was all about, although I have an idea.

When
Shane comes up and joins us, he takes one look at our faces and knows something is up. “What happened?”

“Pretty big fight between Ryan and Brian. Todd broke it up,” Sid
answers.

“Why, what happened?” Shane
probes.

“We don’t know. Something about Brian holding the ball back and not throwing it to Ryan when he
was supposed to.” I try to downplay it as much as possible.

“Well, that’s not good,” Shane clearly
states the obvious. “Looks like they made up,” he says, right as Brian purposely overthrows the ball, making it impossible for Ryan to catch.

“Yeah, it seems like things are back to normal.” Sid
shakes her head and rolls her eyes as she points to the field. Brian and Ryan are both in each other’s faces again.

“You guys are on the same team,” Sid
shouts, not that they can hear her. The coach pulls them both to the sidelines, he is not happy. His face is turning bright red and I can see the spit flying out of his mouth as he screams back and forth between both of them. Although, after that "talk", they finally seem to play as if they know the biggest game of their lives is only two days away.

***

Gretchen
waits for Ryan to come out of the locker room after practice. She seems upset, but she still looks flawless, even after an hour and a half of cheerleading practice. As soon as Ryan comes out, she runs up to him.

“Are you okay?” She
reaches for his hand. 

“I’m fine.” He
pulls his hand away.

“Listen, I just thought Brian needed more help calming down. I know you can handle anything.” She
tries to capture his attention, but he just keeps walking straight ahead without making eye contact.

Finally, he
looks down at her and runs his hand over her hair. “Gretch, you don’t need to explain anything to me. I’m fine.” He almost convinces me, he is so sincere, but I can see the anger on his face. Then he looks in my direction. “Ash, let’s go.” He continues walking toward the parking lot. I know that look and I better go or he will definitely leave me here.

“Ryan, can you still give me a ride home?” she
asks, intending for only him to hear, but we all do. She is trying to keep up with him as he walks briskly toward the parking lot.

He
looks at her and without skipping a beat he says, “Why don’t you go home with Brian? I think he still needs help calming down.”

“Ryan, I want to go home with you.” She
steps in front of him to get him to stop walking and he makes eye contact with her again before finally slowing down.

“If that’s what you want.” He
shrugs and runs his hands through his hair, which means he is either angry or nervous. Right now, I'd go with angry. He clearly isn’t interested in arguing with her or getting into a deeper conversation in front of everyone.

“It is what I want, Ryan. I love you. Is it what
you
want?” It seems like she really needs the answer to this question. I know what she means, but she doesn’t actually say Blythe's name. I’ve always known Gretchen isn’t the brightest, but she is continually surprising me. She really knows how to get what she wants. Maybe I’ve underestimated her.

Ryan finally
stops walking. “Gretch, I will always give you a ride home.” He gently rests his hands on her jaw and kisses her. I mean,
really
kisses her. For the first time, I don’t feel awkward. I want Ryan to get whatever he wants and if he wants Gretchen, then that’s what I want for him.

There
is a lot of awkward silence as we drive Gretchen home. I think mostly because I am there. Once we get home, I fall right into the carrying my cell phone wherever I go routine just in case Todd calls. My phone doesn’t ring, but the doorbell does and, by some miracle, I answer it. Todd is standing on the other side of the door, he is here in person!

“Hi.” I
say, trying not to sound as excited as I am; this is even better than a phone call.

“Hey, Ash!” He
sweeps his hair out of his eyes; it is still wet from his after practice shower and he is wearing that same beat-up EHS grey shirt. For some reason, his eyes look so beautiful when he wears grey. They are a lighter blue with flecks of grey reflecting the color of his shirt. If only he knew how much I study his eyes.

“Is Ryan home?”

“Yeah, he’s here. Come in.” I step back to make room for him. “Ryan, Todd’s here!” I scream upstairs. “He’s in his room. Just go up.” I gesture for him to go in front of me. This day just got a whole lot better. Watching his butt down the hall or across the field at school is one thing, but seeing it up close as he is climbing up my stairs is another thing entirely. This close up view is way better than I’ve ever dreamed; his jeans hug his butt perfectly.

“Thanks, Ash.” He
looks back at me and smiles.

Unfortunately he
’s here to see Ryan. Fortunately, they hang out in his room and I can hear everything thanks to the vent.

"Hey,
Ry, what was going on with you and Brian at practice today? You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good. I don't know. Maybe the pressure is getting to us? I really don’t know what’s bugging him.”

“I talked to him yesterday and he said everything was fine, but it doesn't seem fine." I can tell Todd is sitting on his bed because I can hear him perfectly.

“Yeah, we talked last week and I thought we were good.” There
is a moment of silence and then I hear Ryan again, “He's a loose cannon out there. I never know what he's going to do when I usually know every move he's going to make. Has he said anything to you?"

“Not really. I only know what I saw at practice
when you were ready to kill each other. Scouts are coming and you two need to get it together and stop acting like it’s a joke.” I can hear the anger in his voice.

"What am I suppose
d to do if he doesn’t throw me the ball?”

"Just keep playing; he's going to throw it to you. He wants to win."

There is another long break of silence, and then I hear Ryan, "Do you think it has anything to do with Blythe?" My heart sinks. We've been trying to hide this from him the entire time and he
knows
!

"What do you mean?" Todd
asks cautiously.

"Blythe said she told Brian she just wanted to be friends," Ryan
says nonchalantly.

"Did she say anything else?" Todd
asks with trepidation.

"No, but I don't think Brian has ever been rejected. I'm not sure he can handle it."

"Yeah, well, that's true." I can tell he is relieved Ryan doesn’t know any more.

"Think we should talk to him?" Ryan
asks innocently.

"Maybe?" Todd
knows this isn’t a good idea before the game, but he keeps playing it cool. “Just play hard. Brian will throw the ball to you in the game, you know that. And the scouts will see what a good player you are.”