Aligned (17 page)

She is standing there with her hands on her hips, daring them to defy her. I’m sitting across the room and even I am terrified. Masters is chuckling under his breath and Natasha’s eyes look like they are about to pop right out of her head.

“I said move it!”

The two friends rush to their buddy, who is still sprawled out on the floor, pick him up, and they are gone before I can blink. Andi calmly walks back to her seat and picks up her salad like nothing happened, takes it to the garbage, and walks right out the door.

Masters bursts out laughing so loud it makes me jump. He has tears rolling down his face and can hardly catch his breath,

“Really, Masters? Pull yourself together, man!”

Natasha looks over at him with a smile of her own. “That was rather shocking, not to mention out of character.”

“You’re bloody right it was. That was fantastic! I’ve never even seen Andi kill a fly or raise her voice. Did you see that hit? It was beautiful and fluid and she knocked him right on his—”

Natasha gave him a pointed glare and he shuts up, but is still grinning from ear to ear.

“What in heaven’s name made her act so barbarically? Not to mention completely insane?” I ask.

Apparently Natasha finds this question funny. “As if you even have to ask. Come on, Wesley, for being a genius you sure are dense sometimes.”

This earns a scowl from Masters.

“Drop it, Natasha.”

“Oh, so now you want it dropped. What happened to the pride shining in your eyes only seconds ago? A little violence will perk you right up, but throw in romance and mum’s the word?”

“Yep, that about sums it up. Well, this was fun, but I have a job to get back to…and some men to humiliate,” he adds with an evil smile.

“Come on, Wes,” Natasha says, picking up her tray and getting ready to leave. “Time to head out. I think we’ve had all the excitement we can stand for one day.”

Truer words have never been spoken.

CHAPTER TWENTY

“Stop it, stop it, you’re killing me! She did
not
knock him straight over. He didn’t move, just lay there staring up at her?”

“I’m pretty sure he was too terrified to move,” I say to Molly. She’s on the floor rolling over in a ball, trying to keep from peeing her pants, she says.

“I can’t take it…oh this is too much! I would have given anything to see Andi take that guy out. Why do I miss all the fun stuff?” she whines.

“I’m not gonna lie, it would have been awesome to see,” Dex chimes in.

I look back at both of them in horror. “What’s so awesome about violence and unstable mood swings?”

“Oh stuff it, Wes. You’re just scared now you know Andi can kick your butt!” Molly so elegantly throws at me.

I must turn two shades of green. “You don’t think she’ll beat me up if she’s mad, do you?” I ask, completely serious. Somehow both of my horrid roommates find this question absolutely hilarious. Dex is only moments away from joining Molly on the floor.

“Can’t you see her now? ‘Wesley Sanders, I told you to put your socks in the hamper, not the floor. When I get hold of you I’m going to beat you into next Tuesday!’” Molly taunts.

Dex bursts out laughing. “Cake? You brought me cake? You know I wanted cookies!
Smack!
”

I stand up, having about as much as I can take of their shenanigans. “I’m going to bed now,” I announce, and make a hasty exit.

Right as I am getting ready to go to bed I hear a knock at my door. It’s odd since Roz is usually the only one who comes to my door. I open the door to find a sheepish Dex standing there.

“Sorry, Wes, we got a little carried away out there. We didn’t mean to upset you.”

I sit down on my bed and wait for Dex to take the chair across from me.

“All joking aside, I think that was a pretty cool thing she did, Wes.”

“You do?”

“Totally. It’s hot when chicks go all momma bear.”

“It is?”

“Of course it is! Come on, you mean you weren’t even the slightest bit proud of her for standing up for you?”

Now that he mentions it, it
was
pretty neat that she defended me, not that I needed it. That has always been Roz’s role, and she’s done it so well, I never really thought anyone else cared enough.

“I haven’t really given it much thought.” Normally I would discuss it with Roz. Or should I say Roz would discuss it with me and inform me the best way to handle the situation. Since she isn’t here I should probably talk to Dexter about it.

“What’s bothering you, Wes? Obviously I can tell you’re upset. Is it because she defended you?”

I sigh. How is he supposed to understand how I feel? He is built like a god for goodness sakes, and is scary as all get out. Who would ever mess with him? I doubt he’s been taunted a day in his life. My first instinct is to shut down and go to my safe place of algorithms and far off places in my mind. However, Dexter isn’t one to want to have a heart to heart, so since he’s trying I guess I can too.

“You wouldn’t understand, Dexter. It’s not that Andi defended me, it’s that she felt she had something to defend me from. Guys like you wouldn’t understand,” I say, unable to hide the contempt from my voice.

“Guys like me?” he echoes, sounding more than offended by my remark.

“Yes, guys like you. Big, strong, good looking, smart, fits in with everyone kind of guys. You don’t even have to work for it, people gravitate toward you. Even dark and broody like you are doesn’t seem to affect it.”

“Oh really? You’re right, I don’t know what I was thinking. I’ve never been an outsider, people never judge me or look at me like I don’t belong, whisper about me behind my back, right?” he says contemptuously. “I don’t know who you think I am, Wes, but I’m not that guy. I’m the guy that wasn’t able to save his mom. I let her die right in front of me. You don’t think that got the tongues wagging? I’m the guy that’s barely squeaking by raising a little girl who doesn’t speak and is afraid of her own shadow. I’m the guy whose father tried to kill the love of my life right in front of me! I’m the guy whose body matches the torment and scars on the inside. Don’t think because people don’t taunt me to my face that they aren’t doing it at all. We might have different lives, and I will never understand how hard it is for you…but that doesn’t mean I can’t understand you, sympathize with you…feel for you.” He is looking at me now with so much hurt in his eyes. I’m not one for reading people, but right now I feel closer to Dex than I have anyone. I can tell he understands me on a level I didn’t think anyone could.

“I’m sorry for underestimating you, Dex. I miscalculated.”

Instantly his face transforms into a smile and he pats me on the back. “It wouldn’t be the first time someone has, and most certainly won’t be the last. I don’t open up much, Wes, something I’m trying to work on. I do know what it feels like to walk around feeling like you have a target on your back, knowing the world will never understand your pain. I know Roz isn’t here right now, and that’s gotta be wrecking you, but you do have friends, okay?”

This is probably a hugging moment. If it was one of the girls I’m sure I wouldn’t have a choice in the matter. Luckily Dex isn’t a big hugger, and lord knows I don’t need anything else panic attack inducing today so I awkwardly tap his back twice.

“Thanks, Dex, I really appreciate it.”

“So as much as I understand not wanting Andi to fight your battles for you, how awesome was it seeing that guy get what he deserved? And from a tiny little chick, too? Man, I wish I coulda seen that!”

I laugh when I think back to the shock on that guy’s face, not to mention everyone else in the room.

“Yes, I guess it was pretty cool.”

“On a scale of one to ten how mortified do you think Andi is now?”

I think about reserved, sweet Andi and can’t stop my own smirk. “Probably close to the thousand range.”

“That’s what I thought too,” Dex chuckles. “That’s pretty awesome though that she cares enough about you to do that.”

“Oh, like Roz wouldn’t do that for you!” Dex raises his eyebrows and gives me a skeptical look.

“Oh come on! You don’t buy that indifferent act of hers, do you? And here I thought I was the ignorant one when it came to women!”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Roz might not have punched them, but I guarantee she would have made them go through enough sensitivity training to last them several lifetimes! Not to mention she would probably have snuck a laxative into their food. Nobody messes with anyone she cares about, and whether you want to believe it or not she cares about you, Dexter.”

“She does?” he asks, looking genuinely surprised.

“Of course she does! How can you not know this?”

“Who understands women? Certainly not me!” Dex throws his hands in the air.

Well, he’s got me there. I for one sure don’t.

“If you don’t think she cares for you, replace Karl with a beautiful woman for a week. Roz will breathe fire.” I see an evil glint in his eye and decide now would be a good time to shut my mouth. Dex must have read my mind or decided it was time to start plotting because he stands up.

“Look at us sitting around talking about our feelings like a couple of girls. I need to go lift weights or something to get my manhood back.” He grins and walks out of my room.

“Hey, Dex?” I call after him.

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.”

“Any time, Wes. And for what it’s worth I think you found a keeper. Now it’s time for me to find a hot assistant.”

Roz is going to kill me, but I think I made my first friend without her help, so I’m feeling pretty good.

CHAPTER

TWENTY-ONE

The next morning I walk with my roommates as usual to the Ministry. Out of habit I head up to the Career Department and run into Natasha.

“Good morning, Wesley! I didn’t think we would be blessed with your presence again so soon since you already launched.”

“I came up here out of habit, but there really isn’t a need for me is there?”

“We can always use someone with your talents, Wes. Now that you’re done with the launch what are your plans? Have you given any more thought to your career choice?”

Good question. I’m pretty sure besides Roz, Natasha is the only one of our friends who knows the Council wants me. Part of me feels maybe I should join them. It would be a few years of training to start with anyway, but a huge part of me is holding back. One of my biggest fears is of being inactive and not able to use my mind. I understand being on the Council is a huge honor and an important job, though at the same time I think it would bore me.

“Earth to Wes? Are you there?”

“Oh, sorry, what?”

“I asked you if you were coming back with me.”

“Oh right. Um, no you go on back, Natasha. I’m going to see Dex.”

I head to Dexter’s office and am shown right in to see him.

“Wes, to what do I owe this pleasure?” Dex asks with a knowing smile.

“As I’m sure you know, the Career Department launched my program, so it looks as though I am officially done there. With Roz gone, she won’t be giving me any jobs to research for her, so I thought I’d come to you and see if there was a place that needs my expertise.”

Dex sighs and rubs his forehead. All traces of our joking from last night are gone. I have learned this is a sign whatever comes next I’m not going to like.

“Listen, Wes, while I understand why you are leery about joining the Council, you really would make a superb addition. Have you given any more thought to it?”

It’s my turn to sigh now. “This is me we are talking about, Dex. Of course I’ve thought about it. Thought, agonized, charted, pro/con listed. I keep coming back to the fact that I thrive on discovery, research, developing, and creating. It doesn’t just make me happy, it’s like my air. The idea of sitting in a room all day every day passing laws or whatever it is you guys do makes my throat close and I break out in a rash just thinking about it.”

“I get it, Wes, I really do. Some of the other members might not but if anyone understands I do. You’d be surprised how much Leon has filled them in about you and we all still believe that you would best serve on the Council.”

I am about a second from banging my head on the desk. “And if I turn it down? Where will they place me?”

“Wesley, that’s never happened before. There is absolutely no precedent because nobody has ever turned it down. Being chosen for Council is the highest honor you can get. We don’t want you to feel trapped and we understand your feelings on the matter, but the Council hasn’t changed and you can’t float around forever. Now that Roz is gone you literally no longer have a job position.”

My throat feels like it’s going to close. He’s right. Without Roz here I technically don’t have anything to do. I can’t go from department to department begging for projects. Can I really give up everything I love, everything I am? I don’t realize until Dex comes up beside me and tells me to put my head between my legs that I am hyperventilating. I’m no stranger to panic attacks. Anytime my world seems out of my control I instantly spiral downwards. I look down at my fingers tapping out a rhythm on my leg, and noticed I am counting out loud. Once my breathing evens out I jump up and begin to pace, counting my steps as I go.

“Wesley, calm down. We will figure this out, okay? I’m not going to let anything bad happen to you. Your biggest fear is that you will no longer be productive right?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, let me think about this for a second. So you don’t need to work for a specific department or with other people right? You only want to continue to develop formulas, and do research, continue on with projects, but you can do this on your own?”

I’m not following where he is going at all.

“If you mean do I need help, the answer is no. I’ve always been an independent worker.”

A wide grin breaks out on Dex’s otherwise serious face.

“Okay then, this could be good. So it’s not a department placement you want then, it’s just to stay productive?”

“Yes, we’ve established this, Dexter. Move on.”

“Right, right…I’ll be back in five minutes, all right? Please don’t go anywhere.”

Before I can even answer him Dex is out of his office. And people say I don’t have any social skills, ha!

I count the floor tiles three times and am about ready to leave when Dex walks back in.

“Wesley, my man, I have your problems all figured out.”

“Enlighten me,” I say skeptically.

“I talked to the Council and they agree as long as you keep your position a secret, with Roz being the only exception, you can have a dual role as Council member and consultant. Since you are so diverse in what you know and can do you, can basically be an asset to any department. Anytime there is a case in which your expertise can be used they will call you in as an outside consultant. To the rest of the public that’s what your job title will be.

“Your first duty will be to the Council, of course. But the duties won’t be so hard that you won’t be able to continue your projects. You can fit them in on your downtime, or if there is nothing pressing with the Council even during business hours. What do you say?”

I am rolling the idea around in my mind and it does have merit. I am not one to jump into anything lightly or without a great deal of thought and planning first, though. This is where Roz and I hugely differ. Roz always goes by her gut, she goes on impulse; I don’t have an impulsive bone in my body.

“It could work. Let me think about it and work out the details and I will let you know. I don’t want to agree to anything permanently until I do a trial run, is that fair?”

Dex doesn’t appear happy with my response, but he nods.

“Very well, take some time to think, only not too much please. We will go ahead and start your training. We will fast track your training most likely from two years to one, possibly even sooner if we need to fill a position. As for now you are a Ministry consultant. Let me know when you have come to your decision.”

“Thank you, Dex, I will. And thank you for trying to make everything work. I will see you tonight.” With that I walk out and go home early so I can think.

I spend the rest of the day doing nothing but thinking about what I should do. I make my lists, weigh the pros and cons, measure in every variable I can contemplate, and yet I still don’t have peace one way or the other. I can’t figure out why until I decided to e-mail Roz. I rarely ask Roz for her advice, especially pertaining to work, but that’s when it hit me. I’m having such a hard time making a decision because I don’t know all the variables. The only Council member I know is Dex, and he is the only one I will know until I agree to take the position. Yet, there’s no way I can take a position with people I know nothing about. It goes against everything ingrained in me.

I open up my message box and see that I already have one from Roz.

Wesley,

You are lucky I love you. I promised I’d write you every day so I am. Every single muscle on my body hurts…even my fingers so you better appreciate this! ;) I can’t remember a time I’ve ever worked so hard in my life. My body physically aches and the labor we’ve done here is so much more intense than I ever dreamed. But that’s not all. Emotions have been running high as well. People are scared of the unknown, they all want to do things their own way without listening to others. It’s a good thing I came. I have no clue how the original compound was able to settle and set up as peacefully as they did. I’ve had to pull rank several times and it’s apparent I’m going to have to appoint a leader, at least until this process is done.

I miss everyone so much my heart aches along with my body, and it hasn’t even been long. Not a day goes by where I don’t think about you and Molly, how Grace is doing, and yes, even Dexter. (Don’t you dare tell him!) As hard as these last few days have been for me they have done a lot of good as well. I’ve been able to see people in their lows; I’ve been able to really see what it feels like to trust people with everything you have, to work together for the same purpose. I’ve never felt more proud to represent this dear country than I do at this moment.
:-)

So enough about me, how is everything going there? How did things with Andi turn out? Have you talked yet? Have you decided if it’s something you want to pursue? Has Masters killed you yet for liking his niece? Give everyone my love, it’s time for me to pass out and hope the pain fades by the time I wake up. I love you to the moon and back!

Roz

I miss my best friend. We couldn’t be any more different if we tried, but we have embraced our differences and it really makes us appreciate each other even more for them. I would never in a million years choose to leave the Ministry to go do menial physical labor, but Roz sees it as a labor of love. One of my biggest fears when we found out she was going to be president was that she would outgrow me, that she would become too important to need her silly childhood best friend. I’ve never been happier to be proven wrong. Then again, I can’t think of another time when I have been proven wrong.

Roz,

I’ve missed you too. The Ministry is very different without you here. It feels wrong, and weird, and really you should just come back. I’m sorry to hear you are in pain; this is why physical labor has never held any appeal whatsoever to me. I’m hoping you hurry it up already so you can come home…oh and so those people have a home and all that.

Moving on, everyone here is fine, nothing of consequence happened between Andi and me, (except she punched a guy and told him and his friends off for messing with me).

I’m more worried about my career than my personal life. I had a discussion with Dexter today and the Council still wants me. I hate being in limbo and not having a job. Without you here I have nothing to do. However, I don’t think that’s a good enough reason to join the Council. Dex figured out a way for me to be on the Council and still be a freelance consultant so I can work and use my mind. You would think the best of both worlds would make me happy, yet I’m not. The idea of being in a social situation day in and out gives me hives. I prefer to work independently, and now they want me to work with nine other people consistently. I hate people! Not only that but I don’t even know these people or anything about them. What if I don’t like them? What if we don’t get along? What if they are mean and think I’m weird like everyone else? I guess what I really need to know is who they are. I know you can’t tell me, but can you tell me if you think I could work with them? About their personalities? That kind of thing. You know me, I can’t be expected to make a critical decision of this caliber without all of the data. Looking forward to hearing what you think.

Wes

P.S. I read that if you can find some Epsom salt and a way to take a soak in a hot bath with the salt, it will help relax your muscles.

It is now almost time for dinner. I go wash my hands and ready myself for dinner. I desperately hope Roz checks her email and writes me back before work tomorrow. I have a hard time letting things go. Well, let’s be honest, I have no clue how to let things go, nor do I have the desire to do so. I will be a complete mess until I come to a final conclusion on the matter. After dinner I think I will go pay Masters a visit. It’s a good time to do my workout and maybe it will help distract me if nothing else.