Breathless (20 page)

I sit back on my knees and stare at the shell of my brother.

When this over, and we save Gracen and Lucien has gone to the great beyond, I’m going to make it my mission to make Seth pay. I don’t know how or when, but I know that I will. If there’s anything I’m good at, it’s waiting for revenge. I waited years for my chance to get back at Lucien. I can wait an eternity for my chance at Seth.

If things don’t go my way, and Gracen dies along with the Abomination, even if the Earth is saved, I’ll find whatever way I can to become a demon again. I’ll get my power back, and I’ll destroy Seth, one way or another.

Then I’ll destroy myself.

I owe them that much.

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

The Abomination

R
ED.

Amelia tried very hard to play me. She wanted me on her side, and she wanted me to play by her rules.

She thought she was important.

She was dead wrong.

She’s staring at me.

Her eyes all big and open.

Her jaw ripped from her body.

Her head on a spike.

She thought where she led me I would follow.

I smile at her in the Abyss. She’s just like all the others. Alone and scared. Alone with no hope. Alone where no one who can ever hear them or help them.

Red.

I see red.

A vibration starts at my toes and rolls up my legs toward my belly, toward my heart.

Let it end.

Let it burn.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

Gracen

H
ART IS SCARING ME.

I know that’s a strange thing to say about Hart because he’s spent the better part of forever scaring me. This is different. I’ve never seen him like this. He hasn’t taken his eyes off of his brother’s body, even though I’ve told Hart that Lucien’s not in there anymore.

Truthfully, Lucien is currently pacing the kitchen. Even he knows that something bad is going on. Worse than we could ever imagine.

Seth used the one thing Lucien wants more than anything—getting into Heaven—against him. Using it to control Hart also. I hate Seth. And I hate that we need him.

I turn to go talk to Lucien and nearly run into Seth, who just happened to pop back in.

“We have to hurry.” He throws the book down on the coffee table and throws Hart out of the way like he’s a rag doll. “Gracen, get me a bowl from the kitchen.”

I don’t move. I can only watch as he pulls the big knife, the demon-killing knife I used to kill Hart, out of the waistband of his pants and falls to his knees in front of Lucien.

Hart, of course, is having none of that. He runs over to Seth and tries to pull the knife from his hand. Seth, as we tend to forget sometimes, is a powerful psychopath angel and pushes Hart so hard that he lands against the wall. As he slides down, a trail of red is left in his wake.

“Children!” Seth roars. “We don’t have time for this! Our time is up! The Abomination has already killed Amelia.”

Oh God… if she killed Amelia then that means… “Your mother was long gone already, Gracen. She was dead the moment Amelia took over her body. She was playing you. It was all a stupid trick, and you fell for it. But if you don’t want even more people to die, good people, get your ass in the kitchen and grab me a bowl. We’ve got to do this. Now!”

I know our time is up. No more talking. No more blaming. No more anything. This is it, and Seth has the only plan in town. I head into the kitchen and start looking for a bowl. It’s difficult to open cabinets, not having a body and all, and I have to concentrate very hard on actually opening them. Lucien tries to help. Frankly, he’s more of a hindrance. I can’t explain to him about how to open things. I don’t have time. I have to find a bowl so Seth can cut his heart out.

I’m going to be sick.

I find one, grab it really tightly, and head toward the living room where I hear whispering.

“No…” It’s Hart. The fact that Hart is whispering—and to Seth—makes me pause and listen closely. I don’t think they’re sharing any girly secrets.

“Yes,” Seth says a little louder and then corrects himself. “Yes, Hart. This is how it has to play out. This is our plan.”

“There has to be another way.”

“There is no other way. It’s this or everything dies. I know you don’t like it. Trust me, I don’t either. But know that it’s the only way.”

Even I’m convinced, and I don’t know what the plan is.

“Fine,” Hart pauses. “But let me tell her.”

“Not in a million years.”

“You owe me that much. I’ll tell her while you… cut the heart out of my brother. You get everything you need and fix your little whatever, and I’ll talk to Gracen and make her understand.”

“You don’t think she will?”

“Do you?”

There is a pause.

“Fine. You tell her, but I swear to you, Hart Blackwell. If this goes south in any way, and if she doesn’t complete the mission, we’re all dead. And it’ll be on your head. Do not make me regret this. And don’t think I won’t go over the plan with her before we begin. Just to make sure we’re on the same page.”

“Wouldn’t expect any less from you.”

I hear the floorboard creaking, and I lose concentration on the bowl, which falls to the floor. Lucien is there, trying to pick it up. He can’t, of course. I bet he feels as useless as I do. I don’t think he heard the conversation, though. If he did, he isn’t commenting. I guess he has enough things on his plate, lots of other things to consider. His life, his afterlife I guess, is literally in someone else’s hands. He has no say in it. He’s totally at our mercy. I can’t imagine it’s very pleasant. It’s Hart that picks up the bowl for me. He stands. So do I. So does Lucien, though Hart can’t see him. “Gracen, we need to talk. Outside on the porch.” He moves his eyes around like he’s looking for Lucien. “Alone.”

“Don’t mind me. I’ll just stay in here and watch an angel cut my heart out. No big deal.”

I smile the best I can at Hart. “Lucien says he totally understands.”

“Oh, yes.” Lucien rolls his eyes. “I totally do.”

Hart takes the bowl to Seth and throws it at him. “I need your blood first, Hart.”

Without hesitation, Hart grabs the knife, cuts his arm, and lets his blood—blood tainted by the Abomination—flow into the bowl. I think he gives too much. Seth doesn’t seem to think so. He squeezes Hart’s arm to get every last bit before it clots over.

When Seth seems satisfied, he yanks Hart’s coat from Lucien’s eyes and throws it at Hart. “Cover it up. Stop the bleeding. We need you healthy. Now, go and tell her the sacrifice she has to make.”

Hart throws down the jacket, grabs a lantern, and doesn’t stop until we’re outside on the porch, down the stairs, and under our tree.

“I’m sorry,” he fidgets. “I’m sorry about your mother.”

“And your mother too. Amelia. The Abomination killed her too.”

He flinches. “That bitch was never my mother. Even when she was human. The things she did, the way she acted, like I was the Devil himself. When Lucien and I would get into a fight, it was
me
she’d lock in the closet and
me
she would break broom handles over. She said I was needy and whiny and she wished to God she’d never been cursed with me. I knew it from the time I was three years old and she put blisters on my ass because I dared to touch her old, stupid book. She carried that thing around with her everywhere at home. She finally laid it down. I got curious. I got caught. I got blistered. That was just the beginning. The things she did to me… So, no, I’m not sorry Amelia is gone. I hope she rots in agony.”

I can’t imagine having a mother like that. My mom wasn’t perfect, but I knew she loved me. Hart, he never had a mother to love him. It’s sad. Very sad. Thunder claps overhead. We don’t have much time. “What sacrifice am I going to have to make?”

Hart faces me now. His gaze is warm, but firm. He rubs his fingers through the skin of my face again like he did before. For a second I allow myself to lean into his touch and just feel him. I’d give anything to be able to touch him again. To give him a hug. To give him a kiss. I wish I could tell him I love him and convince him it’s true. I wish for a lot of things, but before I can tell him any of them, Hart gently places his lips to my cheek.

“I don’t have a lot of time to tell you this, but Seth has a plan.”

“I gathered that.”

“And, as much as I hate to say it, it’s a pretty good plan. And he thought I’d have a better chance of convincing you to go along with it than he would.”

That’s not how I heard it. I heard it like he asked to tell me, but I don’t stop him. “That doesn’t make me feel hopeful about it.”

He smiles sadly. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to worry you, and I wish I had more time to make this not as horrible for you to hear. But it is what it is, right?”

“Hart, tell me. I promise I can take it.”

I hope I can. I hope to God I can.

Lucien

I
T ISN’T EVERY DAY
a person watches another person cut his heart out.

I can’t say it is a good feeling or even a healthy feeling or even a feeling I can put into words. It’s… well, strange.

“It’s for the greater good, Lucien,” Professor Mitchell says as he cuts open my chest and moves a few ribs out of the way. I kneel down beside him, fascinated and freaked out all at the same time.

“What’s the plan? I mean, I get having all of this blood and getting Gracen back inside her body. What I don’t get is what good that will do. What happens then?”

Gracen

“
T
HE PLAN IS VERY
simple actually. Remember how you can turn back time, and not in a Cher way?”

I nod. I don’t think I like where this is going.

Lucien

“
I
T’S A VERY SIMPLE
plan, simple as any of this is.” Professor Mitchell digs around inside my chest some more. “Gracen, before she turned, could turn back time. She did it on a few occasions, if you remember. She could turn it back, slow it down, speed it up. I believe that if we put her soul back into her body, she will have all the power of the Abomination behind her and can turn back time… turn it all the way back before any of this ever happened. A few weeks should do the trick.”

I don’t like where this is headed. “Then what? If we still go on the same path, we will end up here no matter what. Nobody ever learns from history.”

“We’re going to change that.”