Authors: Pet TorreS
“There will be a presentation at the College this weekend. My class will present a cultural dance inspired by the Dutch culture. I want you to see me dance the
Natan furrowed his brow. “I have never heard that word.”
We started to walk side by side in the College courtyard.
“This is the name of a Dutch dance! I love it! I remember my father, after all he was Dutch.”
Denise saw us and came to us almost immediately.
“Peta!” She looked at Natan who was beside me and smiled at him kindly, knowing he was the guy I had spoken about.
“Hello,” she said first.
“Hi,” Natan answered and the three of us remained standing.
“Peta, do you want a ride home?”
I looked at Natan and said, “I’ll see you this weekend at my presentation.”
“Okay,” he replied.
“Bye.” Denise nodded her head to him.
“Bye,” Natan replied and stood still in the courtyard, looking at both of us going in the direction of the College parking. Sometimes Natan took the subway to go to college. And when he took his father’s car, usually he gave me a ride to my house.
“He is handsome! I think you hooked a good one but he is quite a timid guy!” Denise exclaimed, walking beside me. She walked like she was waddling whenever she was wearing a dress and high heels.
“I met a guy this weekend. He asked me go out on Friday night.”
“But before that you will attend my presentation at the College Field, you cow
Cow was a nickname that we both had when we were referring to each other from time to time.
“Sure I'll be at your presentation.”
Her arm went across my shoulder.
“I am always there to support you in almost everything in your life. Do not forget that,” she said looking ahead.
“I think it is good!”
We smiled at each other.
I could not see myself without Denise’s friendship. We had been friends from our teenage years. When Denise lost her virginity, I was the first person to know about it, just as she was the first person to know when I lost mine. She was the only one to know about it. Our secrets were kept only between us.
There was never a third person between us.
Presentation at College Field
Due to the Cultural Anthropology Work, we students of history had to do a presentation where the topic was a dance inspired by the Dutch culture. We had to do a performance of a dance called
The space was packed with people. There were several tents with Dutch food and workmanship inspired by the Dutch culture.
In the front of the stage were several girls and guys dressed in costumes for the
dance. The women were dressed in long skirts, petticoats, blouses decorated with pleats, lace, buttons and strips and aprons. The young men wore a typical costume called
The accordionists were also wearing the costume used for the
After the speech of the college dean and some of the faculty members, the dance finally started.
I looked at the audience and saw Denise. She smiled at me. She was wearing red lipstick on her lips. She lifted her hand and looked around, trying to show me that the field was full of people. But my eyes searched for Natan. I still had not seen him.
After a few seconds, I saw someone standing close to the front. He was dressed in a dark shirt and dark jeans and was near a couple who were next to the stage. It was Natan. His eyes were paying attention to me all the time during the dance. He could not watch the dance as a whole. His attention was absorbed only by my body’s movements on stage to the sound of the accordions. There was a young man who was my partner during the dance and he was dancing in front of me, holding my hand. We had to smile and exchange glances constantly. This was part of the dance.
Natan witnessed everything.
He seemed to become nervous during the presentation. His hand reached his nape and scratched it several times. After that he put his hands into his jeans’ pockets and shrugged at the same time as he watched us.
Natan did not seem satisfied with that presentation.
With the end of the dance, I came down from the stage and walked through the university field. I looked at the place where Natan was standing during the presentation but he was gone. I turned my body sideways and glanced around at the stalls and the crowd of people but did not find him.
I kept walking. My head was spinning. I looked all around. I wanted to find him so much. I wanted to make sure he was still there, waiting for me.
It was then, looking ahead, that I saw someone leaning on a dark car parked in the university car park. He had his arms crossed over his chest and was staring down at the floor. During my approach he did not look up at me.
“Natan,” I muttered as I stopped before him.
He raised his head and looked at me seriously. He seemed annoyed. His melancholy gaze analyzed my costume and then he looked to one side, quickly removing his gaze from my image that clearly upset him for some reason.
“I hated that presentation,” he confessed coolly.
“Why?” I approached him more and stopped before him. Natanael raised his head and looked into my blue eyes which I had outlined with black pencil.
“I felt jealous to see you dancing with that guy! You two exchanged smiles and intimate looks, I ...”
He shook his head and looked away.
“What bullshit!” I shook my head. “All that was part of the dance and for your information that guy has a fiancé.”
Natan looked at me again. His anger seemed to diminish. I took another step forward and came face to face with him. Natan’s hands held my face on both sides and he confessed to me, “I want you to be my girlfriend!”
“Girlfriend?” I asked.
I smiled, quite surprised. We didn’t know each other well and I felt that Natan was being quite forward. I did not know if something serious between us would be the best decision to be made.
“Yeah!” he said looking into my blue eyes. “I want you to be my girlfriend.”
After the presentation I took Peta home in my father's car. As always, she convinced me come into her house and as always I couldn’t refuse her invitation. There was a very strong chemistry between us which prevented our bodies from wanting to be separated from each other for a long time.
Peta opened her front door but she had no time to turn on the light in the living room. The house was dimly lit. She closed the door again behind us and when she turned to face me I came up close to her, pulled her by the waist and surprised her with a kiss on the lips.
Our tongues dueled. Peta opened her lips against mine and moaned into mine softly. My hand held the sides of her face and I kissed her with a burning desire, in order to know where all that fire would take us and how far we would burn with it.
I crossed my arms over her lower limbs and brought her up, her legs crossed at the top of my waist. Peta could feel my erect penis even inside my dark jeans. I knew that because she looked at me and smiled. Not ungluing my lips from hers, I walked with her to the couch and sat down with her on my lap.
I closed my eyes and rested my neck against the body of the sofa when I felt Peta start rolling over me. Quickly she pulled the shirt from my body and started kissing, sucking and biting my nipples. I firmly held her by her hair and pulled to bring her face to my mouth up to mine. My tongue slid down her chin and then back up her lips.
She groaned into my mouth.
Peta lifted her head and stared at me in the eyes then she began to slowly unbutton her lacy, white blouse with ribbons. My eyes were fixed on her finger’s movements.
She removed her shirt from her body and then she unhooked her bra back and brought it down slowly. My eyes were on a pair of beautiful breasts with a few freckles and with rosy nipples.
Without interruption, my face slammed into them. I began to lick them in full after biting them carefully.
Peta moaned softly and strongly held onto my straight, dark hair.
“Make me yours!” She whispered and her hands went down to my waist and opened my belt. She unbuttoned my jeans and lowered the zipper. Her hand came into my pants and felt my hardness in her palm.
“I want you to make me yours tonight!” She whispered touching her lips to my left ear and then thrusting her tongue into it. I shuddered and released a groan which I had tried to contain.
“I cannot!” I exclaimed and quickly took her off my lap.
Peta looked rightly confused and then frightened and protected her breasts with her own arms.
“What’s wrong?” She asked confused.
I bent forward, leaned my elbows on my knees and stared at the floor, trying to get control over my breath. My desire to continue that artful game was so strong. I so wanted to take Peta in the direction of the bed and make her mine as she had begged me.
“I cannot go to bed with you,” I confessed looking at the floor through my open knees.
She still did not understand my words and pulled her blouse up from the couch. She quickly put it on again, forgetting to protect her breasts.
“The reason is…I’ve never gone to bed with any woman before.”
I had finally confessed the reason and waited for a response but she remained silent, looking shocked with my revelation.
In our generation was not usual for a young man after twenty-one years to still be a virgin. It was unusual not to have had his first sexual experience.
Regardless of the cost to my ego, I continued talking with my head bent.
“For me, being from a conservative family, I always heard my parents say I should guard my first time and give it only to the woman who would be my wife. And she should also have to be that way.” I looked to one side, but not to her.
“My shyness has also contributed to it. I never had a girlfriend before. I got involved with some girls, but never got to consummate the relationships. Nothing ever got that far with any of them! I always had in mind that I should follow my parents’ example. They married pure and I must do the same.”
“Okay.” Peta rose with the blouse hiding her breasts. “I respect your will.”
She walked to the window and opened it to look at the starry sky while muttering something.
“One thing is certain. You will have to look for another girl to date and marry her ...” She paused and looked at me as I was sitting on the couch, watching her standing in the open window. “Because I'm not the perfect woman for you.”
She looked down and continued saying, “I’m no longer pure ...”
At that moment I looked down to the floor and I bent my head even further. My head began to shake. I looked up at her. She hadn’t moved.
“I think you'd better go and forget that you asked me to start dating.” She looked out the window. “Go away and forget that I exist! It will be best for you!”
Peta turned her back to me and remained standing at the window. I continued sitting on the couch in a state of shock. I could have sworn Peta was a virgin despite the way she dressed and behaved.
Irritated by my lack of initiative to leave the couch, she hurriedly turned, walked to me and pulled me from the seat, clutching my arms.
“Go away, damn it! Don’t you get it?”
Her hand took my shirt off the couch and threw it on my chest with anger. Her tears ran down her face.
“Go away! Please!”
Her arms crossed over her breasts. She began to sob quietly.
“I do not want to ruin your life,” Peta said keeping her back to me.
Completely silent, I put on my black shirt and looked sadly at her back. Peta was still crying quietly. Cowardly I left her home without saying another word.
For the first time, our differences had been revealed and ruined everything.