“You’re right, all of that and more is trust that we’ve built between us. I trust you with Susa’s life, her wellbeing. I even trust you not to break her heart by neglecting her. She’s half in love with you already. If we told her she could call you Daddy, she’d be over the moon. That’s not the kind of trust I’m talking about.”
Con managed to look both pleased and upset at the same time. “Thank you for telling me. If we aren’t talking about my willingness and ability to be a good father, what are we talking about?”
“You and Susa want us to be a family. Each of us would die before we let anything harm my daughter. But what about ourselves? How can you trust me after I hurt you, as I’m more than willing to admit I did? How can I trust you when you pull underhanded, manipulative tricks like you tried in Montana and when you interfere in my business life without consulting me?”
“I didn’t…”
She raised a hand. “You called Buddswell, and whether you asked him for a favor or merely suggested he time his visit to Arizona earlier than anticipated doesn’t matter. If you believed in me, really believed in me, you would suggest to me that I contact Mike, then leave it up to me to decide how to handle my business. You’ve treated me pretty much like a green intern with no business savvy whatsoever. The root of all of this seems to be my resistance to marriage. Regardless of the fact that I felt I had good reason, you said it yourself, I hurt you deeply. That kind of hurt destroys trust and doesn’t heal easily. If we can’t mend our relationship then we’d make Susa a lousy family, and she’s probably better off with separated parents.”
Con stared at Tam. She’d just shattered his dreams for the second time. He was a damned fool. Nothing he could do would convince Tam they belonged together. They’d never be a family.
When she disappeared seven years ago he swore he’d never again allow anyone to hurt him like that, but she had. She pierced him to the quick before he had the chance to bare his heart and prove his trust in her and her love. Now, with a few short sentences, she laid waste every hope. She was wrong about so much, but she was right about one thing, if he couldn’t gain her faith in him, if she couldn’t see his faith in her, then any marriage between them was doomed, and Susa would suffer most when the marriage failed.
Sick with grief, he shifted away from Tam to face the road. Turning the keys in the ignition, he pointed the car toward the house that Susa and Tam called home.
“I’ve lost my appetite. Do you still want to stop for breakfast?”
“I’m not hungry anymore.”
“Fine.”
They finished the drive in silence. Once home, they unloaded the car together. Tam put things away, while Con washed dishes and other items. Then they parted, burrowing into their separate rooms like wounded animals, waiting for Susa to come home from her overnight and bring back the illusion that they could be a family.
****
The loan proposal was due at the lender’s office by end of business the day after her meeting with Buddswell. Tam would meet with Mike for lunch, then work at a frantic pace to get details of their deal included in the proposal. Despite that disastrous date and the hopeless situation with Con, she plunged into a flurry of activity that filled the next few days.
The morning of her meeting with Mike she received a call from him. He’d had an unexpected delay, and could they move their meeting to that evening? He would like to take her to dinner to begin discussions about the business deal between the companies. Panicked because she had plans to spend the evening with Susa, she asked if they could meet early Tuesday morning. She’d still have time to cobble together something about the Buddswell deal for the lender.
“Sorry, darlin’. I want to spend Tuesday visiting local Native American communities to get a feel for the market. This is short notice, but I’d like your office to set that up for me, if you don’t mind, since your company has the contacts. Then I have meetings all day every day until Friday. I wanted to get our deal rolling so that your legal guys and mine could work out the details and have everything ready to sign just before I leave that weekend.”
“I’m sorry too. While I’m certain that TLC can arrange for your visits to the Native American nations, I won’t break my promise to my daughter.”
“So this deal’s gonna fall apart because of a kid?”
“No, you’re going to join us for dinner Monday, and as soon as Susa is in bed, we’ll negotiate the deal.”
“I’ll bring my secretary to take notes.”
“You’re welcome to do so, but I have someone at the house who can take notes.”
“You got a secretary at your home?”
“You know better. I’ve got Connor O’Neal.”
“Whoeee! He still there? You two really are getting together?”
Tam bit back the mix of anger and regret that thoughts of Con inspired. “I’m unwilling to discuss that with a business associate.”
“Well, Connor’s a smooth talker. You hold out until you get everything you want on the table.”
“I’ll consider your advice, but Connor taught me the art of the deal, so I know all of his tricks and a few of my own.”
“Then I’d better watch out, or you just might steal my shirt during our negotiations and leave me glad that you did it.”
What had begun as a busier than normal day at the office suddenly ratcheted into high gear. The moment she ended the call with Buddswell, she called the loan approval office, getting a one-day extension so she could include information on a new revenue stream. After that she held meetings with legal, marketing, shipping, and any other TLC staff involved in the Buddswell deal. She had her assistant draft notes on the existing Buddswell files while Tam herself reviewed the proposal given to Buddswell and decided on changes she wanted. She took a quick break for lunch and called Con while she wolfed down a salad. Their argument from the morning after their date had lingered gloomily for days but was now pushed to the farthest back burner.
“Donal residence.”
Tam smiled. “I always get a kick when you answer my phone like that. Makes me think I have a butler.”
Con chuckled, then put on a snooty accent. “In that case, how may I serve you, Madam?”
“I need you to go to the grocery store for me and get four steaks, a half dozen ears of corn, some deli coleslaw, and a six pack of beer.”
“Sounds delicious. I’ll get the stuff on my way to pick Susa up from school. What’s the occasion?”
“Buddswell’s been delayed a few hours.”
“No kidding. I heard he puts a kink in the itinerary sometimes as a way to test new business colleagues.”
Her hand jerked, and the phone bumped her ear. “You knew that he pulls this short notice stunt? How come you didn’t tell me?”
“I knew you could handle it, even before you repeated your warning that you didn’t want me interfering in your business dealings.”
Tam took in his comment for later reflection and moved on. “We’ll want to eat by six-thirty. I’m going to try to leave work early enough to come home and grill the steaks myself, but I need to count on you to fill in if I’m not able to break away.”
“No problem. Anything else?”
“Yes, I promised Susa we would have a story night tonight.”
“I can read to her.”
“Story night isn’t just reading to her. She reads to me. I read to her. We make up stories separately and together. We also paint our nails and play with makeup. On story nights I give Susa the entire night from dinner to bedtime. Buddswell knows I have this commitment, though I didn’t tell him the details, so he isn’t expecting to talk until after Susa’s in bed. I want you to entertain Mike while I’m with Susa.”
Silence from Con’s end of the line told Tam he was hesitating. “Aren’t you afraid that I’ll interfere?”
“Yes, I am, especially because Buddswell may make it impossible for you not to interfere. What other options do I have? I have to trust you.”
“Let me deal with Susa.”
“No. I’ve never broken a promise to her, and I don’t intend to start now. If I’m lucky, Buddswell will be satisfied with having you tell him that since
Tam is the owner of TLC, she’d better respond to whatever it is that he’s asking for
.”
“Fair enough. I’ll get him started talking basketball, and he’ll carry the conversation until you force him to stop.”
“Sounds like a plan. I’ve got to run. With any luck I’ll see you in an hour or so.”
An hour or so turned out to be more like three and a half. Tam walked into her kitchen while Con was still unloading the car.
She gave him a hand with the groceries, and bussed Susa’s cheek as the child barreled through the kitchen on her way to Nancy’s house three doors down.
“You haven’t forgotten story night, have you Mommy?”
“Nope, I’m ready. How about you? Did you get your homework done? No story night until homework is done.”
“All I had was spelling. We got a test tomorrow. Con and I practiced in the car, so I’m done.”
“Fantastic. I want you home by six. We’re having company.”
Instantly Susa started to bounce. “Who? Do I know them? Who is it, Mommy?”
“A business associate.”
“But tonight’s story night.”
“Don’t worry, fairy girl. My associate knows about story night. Our business will wait until you’re in bed. However, I do need you to be extra good tonight.”
“As long as I get story night, I promise. I’m going to Nancy’s house.”
“Be good and be home on time.”
“Yes, Mommy.” She was out the door before Tam could more than think about giving Susa a hug and a kiss.
“It must be hard to think of not having Susa with you always.”
She nodded, still looking out the door, watching to make certain her independent little girl made it safely to Nancy’s. “Yes.”
Con’s hands settled on Tam’s shoulders and began rubbing at the tension knots in her upper back. “It doesn’t have to be that way. Neither one of us has to miss another minute with her. Marry me, Tam. Let’s be a family.”
Her heart ached. If she believed they could succeed, she’d marry Con in an instant, but she wasn’t certain.
She needed certainty.
For Susa’s sake and her own, Tam needed certainty that he truly wanted them and wasn’t guided by his vaunted determination to always achieve any goal he set.
“I can’t think about that now, Con. I need time, and right now providing for my daughter is tops on my priority list. Let me get through this business with Buddswell and the loan approval, and I promise I’ll think your proposal over seriously.”
“I want what’s best for Susa.”
“So do I, Con. So do I.”
Chapter Sixteen
Tam closed the door to Susa’s room and headed for the living room.
“Naw. Jordan was good, but the game was way different then. Cazzie Russell’s still got my vote for greatest all around ball player ever.”
“Better even than Bird.”
“Hell yes. The Celtics team made Bird great, not the other way ‘round.”
“All right, gentlemen, let’s suspend the greatest player debate while Mike and I discuss the most advantageous way to get Buddswell’s products into the Four Corners Native American market.” She sat in a club chair opposite the former basketball star. “I’m sorry your secretary came down with a cold at the last minute. Is it okay with you if Con sits in for her and takes notes?”
“Sure, I trust Con to represent our conversation honestly. Though I’m not sure I trust his spelling.”
They all chuckled.
“We’ll both complete a full review before we sign off on the notes and allow our legal offices to make use of them,” Tam assured Mike.
“That suits me just fine.”
Con took out his tablet computer and prepared to take notes. Then he settled back into the couch to watch two of the best negotiators he knew trying to finesse advantages from each other. For Con this was akin to watching a world championship boxing match. The strategies were set ahead of time based on what each opponent knew about the other. The tactics, feints, jabs, hooks, body blows, etc, were put into play as the bout progressed—and as each combatant got more information, he or she used knowledge gained about the foe’s personal weaknesses to undermine any attack and ensure victory.
At one point the negotiations seemed in danger of breaking down. Then Tam surprised Mike with the assertion that, “Your bottom line will increase every year for at least five years.”
“Why five years?”
“That’s how long my marketing department estimates it will take Buddswell’s to dominate the Four Corners Native American market. Of course, we haven’t even discussed projections of what your company gains as my share of nationwide Native American distribution increases.”
“I’m impressed. Don’t suppose you’d like to work for me?”
She grinned but shook her head. “Not on your life, Mike. I thank you for the offer, and your confidence, but I like being my own boss too much to work for anyone.”
“I actually understand that. I think we’re agreed on the general nature of our deal. Let’s iron out the major details.”
They worked on the individual pieces of the deal, marketing, scheduling, price points and such for the next two hours. By the time Con sent a copy of the notes off to Buddswell’s e-mail address and put away the tablet computer, all of them were exhausted.
“I better get going. Your team did a great job putting together that itinerary for visiting the reservations tomorrow. I’m meeting informally with the advisory councils of every nation within reasonable driving distance of Phoenix. You’re both welcome to join me.”
Con knew the invitation for what it was—a thinly veiled suggestion that Mike wanted his new distribution partner to cater to his every whim. Tam had already done that once by having her staff arrange, on very short notice, the meetings with the Native American nations. Mike wanted to know how hard he could push and how badly Tam wanted the deal they’d just shaken hands on. Con wanted to know if Tam could be pushed or would she stick to her guns and fight for what she really wanted—Buddswell’s recognition of her not as a lackey or a female but as an equal, intelligent business professional.
“Sorry, I have other clients who need my attention,” she declined with a smile.