“Now is what counts.”
“Fine, what kind of a parent lets a child badger him into a gift, let alone one that cost hundreds of dollars?”
“Susa didn’t badger me. In fact she didn’t ask for a single thing. She’s so darned well-behaved sometimes she’s scary.”
“You don’t know anything about her or raising a little girl. Speaking of which, routines are important to children. Tonight you disrupted Susa’s routine, and I won’t have it.” Tam stepped around the corner of the sofa, coming close enough to jab at his chest with the edge of the envelope.
“Kids need variety too, Tam.” Refusing to back down, he moved forward. Barely an inch separated them. “Are you certain you aren’t straight-jacketing Susa’s creativity with slavish adherence to a routine?”
“Are you saying I haven’t raised my child right?”
“Our child, Tam. Ours. Together. If you imagine I’m suggesting that there’s something wrong with the way you’re raising Susa, then you must have some doubts about your own parenting. I’m new to the parenting business, so maybe I’m allowed a mistake or two. What’s your excuse?”
“I don’t need an excuse. Susa’s my daughter, and I’ll raise her as I see fit. However, as long as we’re on the subject of mistakes, where do you get off trying to solve my business problems for me? Trying to steal Susa’s affections isn’t enough for you? You have to undermine my confidence in my business abilities too?”
The daggers had turned to flame. Her face flushed, and her chin jutted in challenge. Lord, she was beautiful, and angry. “What in Hades are you talking about?”
“I got a call from Buddswell today. He wants to meet in two weeks to discuss the proposal I gave him in Montana. He also said to tell you hello. What did you do?”
Con had forgotten all about his call to Buddswell. “I just gave him a nudge. I called him Saturday and suggested that if he was really interested in the Four Corners Native American market that he ought to call you or he’d miss a good opportunity.”
She stopped bristling but held her ground. “You didn’t tell him I was in trouble, or suggest he come down here and make a killing?”
“I told him no such thing.” Although Con had implied that an in-person visit might be more productive than trying to deal long distance. He eyed Tam and her barely-there shorts. Maybe he’d been wrong. Good thing he was sticking around a few more weeks, if Buddswell was coming to Phoenix in person. Con would have time to smooth over this misunderstanding and still prove to Tam that they belonged together.
“Well thank you for that, but you had no business interfering.”
“I’m Susa’s father. How is it wrong for me to want the best for her and help that happen?” He took one step forward, forcing Tam to move or be plastered against him.
“Wanting the best for Susa isn’t wrong. Interfering in TLC Distribution is.” She backed away, but her chin still had that stubborn set. “There are limits, and you crossed them. If I can’t trust you to respect my work, how can I trust you to respect my parenting? If you and I are constantly at odds, Susa will end up with the worst parenting instead of the best. Is that what you want?”
She’d pushed him too far with her doubts and accusations. Between her damn restrictions, and those shorts, and the passion that she gave to everything in her life, his control crumbled. He’d had her passion for himself once. He wanted it back. “What I want is this.”
He dragged her into his arms, crushing the envelope between them, bent his head, and plundered her mouth.
Tam gloried in the deluge. One of the best parts of living with Con had been the moments like this when Con’s laid back control burst, then need, desire, longing drenched them both.
She answered his flood of kisses with a tidal wave of her own. Sensation welled, overflowing any resistance.
He touched her everywhere at once. Where his fingers trailed, she burned. Where his palms stroked she went up in flame. So intense was her response that her own attempts were less than polished. She grabbed his butt, yanking him to her and ground her pelvis against the hard length of him. She sank her tongue into his mouth, licking and savoring the dark edgy flavor of him. She pressed closer and closer, hooking one leg over his hip unable to get close enough. She pulled her mouth away from his to mark his neck.
Too soon, Con raised his head from where he sucked on her earlobe. He labored to breathe. “Whoa. Slow down a bit, please.”
Her breathing just as labored, she lifted her gaze to search his face. What was he saying?
“We have to stop.” He leaned his forehead against hers.
“Why?” Unquenched longing strangled her. With the exception of that night in Montana and a few all too brief kisses, she hadn’t felt this alive since before she’d left him in Chicago.
“Just for a little while.”
“Why?”
“Mommy, did you and Con decide that he’s gonna be my daddy?”
“That’s why.”
Tam peeked around the side of Con’s shoulder. Her loving, precocious daughter stood at the arched end of the living room, holding her new doll close to her chest. The expression on Susa’s face was the same one she wore just before opening her first gift on her birthday—eager, anticipating, curious, with just a shade of doubt.
Slowly Tam let her leg drop from around Con’s hip, straightened her shoulders, and pulled her rumpled clothes into order.
Con’s hands were busy making adjustments to his pants as she wiped her mouth on the back of her hand and stepped around him. “No, Susa, we haven’t decided anything yet.”
Doubt won over anticipation, and Susa’s brow wrinkled. “But you were kissing and stuff. The kissing’s okay, I guess. But Nancy says that only married people or people who are gonna get married can do that other stuff.”
Tam swallowed, horrified that she’d been so careless and might have scarred her daughter for life.
“I don’t think Nancy’s right,” Susa continued. “‘Cause people who aren’t married do stuff on TV all the time.”
Clearly Tam needed to screen her daughter’s viewing habits with greater care.
“You know that what you see on TV isn’t real, don’t you Susa?” Con spoke from behind Tam.
“I know. But if TV isn’t real, and you and Mommy haven’t decided anything, then you have to go on a date.”
“A date?” Tam asked the question in unison with Con.
“A date is how two people find out if they like each other enough to be married, and to be a mommy and a daddy together you should be married, so you need to go on a date.”
“Susa, it isn’t appropriate for you to discuss whether or not Con and I should date.” Tam tried to issue the reproof as gently as she could, but sheer nerves tightened her voice.
“Susa, I promise your mother and I will go on a date. Now go get some pizza. Your mom and I will be right behind you.”
Her daughter flew toward the kitchen. At a slower pace Tam and Con followed.
“You shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep.” She glared back at him.
“Oh, but I can keep this one.”
“How do you know that?”
“Because you won’t want to disappoint our daughter or have her see you break a promise for no reason.”
“My daughter—and I have plenty of reason.”
“Anything you’d be willing to share with Susa?” he leaned forward to whisper in her ear.
His breath tickled her nape, and her skin buzzed. She couldn’t think. “No.”
“See. Now let’s have dinner. We can discuss our date after Susa’s asleep.”
Chapter Fourteen
Tam started negotiations by refusing to go anyplace with Con where she might get trapped into a repeat of that kiss, or worse. Not that she didn’t trust him. No, the person she didn’t trust was herself, and she was very much afraid that he knew it.
Con declined her offer of a mid-week lunch date at a sandwich shop near her office. “That’s a business meeting, not a date,” he remarked, then countered with “how about a picnic a week from tomorrow, Saturday evening? We’ll go to a public park.”
Tam could find no fault with the plan, so she gave cautious agreement. “On one condition, we come home the minute I say the date is over.”
“C’mon, Tam. You’ve got to give me at least an hour. I promise not to do anything you don’t want to do.”
She knew he wouldn’t. He’d always been true to his word, but could she rely on her own treacherous heart to keep emotional and physical distance between herself and her too-tempting ex?
The next Saturday, despite every effort to fill her time with date delaying demands, Tam was ready a good half hour early. The negotiations with new clients were going smoothly. The report for the loan approval committee was ready with an entire section waiting to include the results of her discussions with Buddswell. The house was cleaner than it had ever been with her aunt away. Even her daughter had deserted Tam. Nancy was having a slumber party, and the girl’s mother had agreed to welcome Susa early. Con was dropping Susa off now. As soon as he returned, he and Tam would head for the park.
****
It didn’t take long for her to realize his intended destination. “We’re going to the Apache Trail scenic drive. That’s one of my favorite spots in the world. How did you know?”
“I wish I could pretend that I’m simply very sensitive to your likes and dislikes, but the truth is I pumped Susa for information about where you take her for outings. She mentioned about ten places, but every other one was on the Apache Trail. We should get there in time to have our picnic and watch the sunset.
“We’ll be coming back after sundown. The trail is full of switchbacks and sharp drop-offs, are you sure we should drive it in the dark?”
“If we leave right after sundown, we should have enough light to get to the bottom of the trail before full dark.”
“And if we don’t leave promptly?”
“Then we might be stranded for the night on another mountainside.” He gave her a lopsided leer.
“Arizona nights can be cold, even in the summer, and this time we wouldn’t have a concrete tram shack for shelter.”
“No, we’d have this car, and I’m sure we could find ways to keep each other warm.”
He was right, and clearly he knew her weak points.
“If you’re looking for a repeat of our adventure in Montana, I’m uncertain I want that to happen.”
Who am I kidding? I can’t wait to get naked with Con.
“I’ve already promised not to do anything you don’t want, and frankly your lack of trust disappoints me.”
She tried not to wallow in the guilt that washed over her. “I trust you, Con. I always have.”
“Not in everything. You didn’t trust me to be a father to Susa. You didn’t trust us enough to come back, to fight for us and O’Neal Corp.”
“Isn’t it sufficient that we’re working on trust now? Please, let’s not spoil the evening with recriminations.”
“Fine.” He shot the word from thin tight lips.
“Excellent.” Her temper flared at his sour response, so she folded her arms across her chest and focused on the view. If he wanted to be crabby and spoil their date, let him. She intended to enjoy herself no matter how surly he became.
When Con pulled into the parking area at Fish Creek Hill the tension had eased.
Tam grabbed her tote and the picnic basket and, while Con manhandled the cooler, led the way to a secluded spot she knew.
In no time they had the picnic cloth spread on the ground, anchored at the corners by the tote, the cooler, the basket, and a spare blanket. They dined on salad, salmon pâté, and whole-grain crackers, washed down with lemonade.
The light began to dim, and an orange-gold hue washed the edges of the few fluffy clouds sighing through the evening sky. The pale roses and grays of the rock formations came alive with flaming reds and searing purples.
Con’s fingers twined with hers. Nervous, Tam tried to distract him. She put all the used containers and dishes in the basket, insisting that he load it into his vehicle.
“We’ve got pound cake and lemon sauce for dessert,” she announced as he returned to sit beside her.
She leaned toward the cooler. Con’s hand sliding up her arm held her back.
“I had something else in mind. If it’s all right with you?”
“What?” She shifted back toward him, questions in her eyes but certainty in her heart that she wanted this, wanted to make love with him, hold and cherish him. Her body had missed his. Her mind ached for the challenges he offered, and her heart? Her heart had been his always. Leaving him to finish her education had been the hardest thing she’d ever done. Leaving him in Montana had nearly killed her. But even her heart’s desire would not be allowed to threaten her daughter. So she wanted tonight with Con. Tomorrow would be soon enough to decide if they could have more.
“This.”
His kiss was gentle, tender, like the soft mountain breeze ushering in the night. He kissed her lips, cheeks, closed eyes, poured kisses over her face. Each caress lingered, a small tingling heat that fired need and longing. His aroma enveloped her. She clutched his shoulders and sought his mouth, capturing incandescent joy between them.
Placing his hands on either side of her head, he tilted her face, aligning their mouths. His tongue licked into her, and the glow of his kiss burst into all-consuming flame. She pressed herself to him, rubbed her aching breasts against his chest, wanting, needing and unable to help herself.
The world tilted, and she lay on the blanket. Braced on his arms, Con hung above her surrounded by a thousand brilliant stars, as if joy exploded her heart and the pieces lit the sky above him.
He stroked one hand over her hair. “You are so beautiful, such an amazing woman. I’ve missed you, Tam.”
“I’ve missed you too, Con. You have no idea how much.”
“Show me?”
“Yes.” She nodded, smiling, then reached for the buttons of her shirt. As she released each tiny disk, eagerness bloomed in his eyes. She felt the heat grow between them where his hips pressed against hers.
His eyes, hot and eager before, grew wild as she slowly bared herself. His gaze stroked; his glance licked and sucked.
Tam gasped. Desire raged against aching emptiness. Her hips lifted, increasing the pressure of their bodies, but she couldn’t reach him. His clothing and hers armored them.